Inside Bipolar

Why is schizoaffective disorder so often overlooked — even by mental health professionals — and how does it relate to bipolar disorder? In this episode, Dr. Nicole Washington sits down with guest host Kit Wallis (aka SchizoKitzo) to discuss Kit’s life managing schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type.Kit shares her decade-long journey through multiple diagnoses, from cyclothymia to bipolar I, before finally receiving the correct diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder. Kit explains why this diagnosis finally made sense and how she educated herself on her disorder.If you’ve ever wondered about the blurry lines between bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and schizoaffective disorder — or just want to hear a powerful story of self-advocacy — this episode is for you.Cold Open Transcript: Dr. Nicole: Some people will tell me that their voices are not all bad, and they don't necessarily want to get rid of them.Kit: Oh, man. That's a can of worms. That is a can of worms. When I was telling my psychiatrist that I was experiencing religious delusions, and I went on antipsychotics to get rid of the god who hated me, but not necessarily for the voices who helped me so much. I ended up losing the others and I think about the voices that I don’t hear anymore all the time because I miss them that much.We have a guest host (Don't worry, Gabe Howard will be back!) for this episode:Our host, Kit Wallis, who goes by SchizoKitzo, is a content creator who advocates for schizoaffective and bipolar disorders. She uses long-form videos on her YouTube channel and short-form content on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Her content centers around her personal experience with schizoaffective disorder and often includes deep dives into research topics regarding mental health.Kit was diagnosed with the bipolar type of schizoaffective disorder in late 2020 and has struggled with symptoms since she was in middle school. Schizoaffective disorder is a mental health condition where someone experiences symptoms of schizophrenia--such as delusions and hallucinations--but also symptoms of a mood disorder--either major depression or, in Kit's case, bipolar. Realizing there was a lack of schizoaffective advocates, she decided to start her SchizoKitzo project to raise awareness for this complex condition.The mission of SchizoKitzo is to raise awareness of schizoaffective disorder and all of its aspects, from the mood side to the psychotic side. Kit works to bridge the gap between life and science so she can help break the stigma around mental health.Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions.Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever wonder what happens when two complex mental health conditions collide? In this episode, host Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and board certified psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington, peel back the layers of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and bipolar disorder, challenging the clichés and misconceptions that have long overshadowed these conditions.Using humor, candor, and expert insight, they share personal anecdotes and surprising research that illuminate the hidden battles behind intrusive thoughts, relentless rituals, and shifting moods. This conversation dives deep into how misinterpreting symptoms can lead to confusion and missed diagnoses — making it a must listen for anyone seeking clarity on the comorbidity of these two conditions.  Whether you’re navigating these challenges yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode invites you to rethink what you know about OCD and bipolar disorder.“It's very difficult to have an episode about OCD and bipolar disorder because they're two unique illnesses that present in very unique ways. And I'm not sure what it looks like when they blend together. You may or may not have it. The things that you're describing as OCD may very well just be personality traits or just part of bipolar disorder. So I want to ask you very specifically, is there anything unique about OCD and bipolar disorder put together that our audience needs to know that our listeners should be aware of or concerned about?”~Gabe Howard, HostOur host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Many people with bipolar disorder experience trauma — either from external events or even from the disorder itself. In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive into the deep waters of managing trauma with bipolar disorder.They cover the differences between trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), debunking common misconceptions. They explore how experiences like suicidal episodes, hospitalization, job loss, and manic behavior can leave lasting emotional scars and why it’s important to manage them.Most importantly, they discuss how to validate your experiences, communicate with loved ones and medical professionals, and take steps toward healing. If you've ever felt dismissed or struggled to explain how bipolar-related trauma affects you, this episode is a must listen."People with bipolar disorder have trauma because of it. So much of this is driven from the fact that people aren't taken seriously. I want to say, as a person living with bipolar disorder, it is real. Bipolar disorder caused you trauma. You are traumatized because of your experiences with bipolar disorder." ~Gabe Howard, HostTo learn more -- or read the transcript -- visit the official episode page. Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bipolar doesn’t just impact mood — it can take a toll on your sex drive, too. In this frank conversation, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, break down how both depression and mania affect libido, the frustration of losing sexual desire, and the pressures of maintaining intimacy in relationships.They cover why some people care deeply about their loss of sexual desire while others barely notice and seem not to mind. How do medication side effects and the emotional weight of bipolar disorder complicate sex and intimacy? And what about the expectations partners place on each other?This episode tackles it all — including the unspoken struggles of men and women navigating sex while managing mental health and the symptoms of bipolar disorder. Whether you're personally affected or supporting a loved one, this episode offers crucial insights into an often overlooked topic."When it gets right down to it, hyposexuality is simple. Your libido is lowered and you don't know why. You need to follow this up. I know people are listening to this because bipolar disorder is what they feel is causing their issue." ~Gabe Howard, HostTo learn more -- or read the transcript -- visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) often conjures extreme images — either as a medieval torture method or a miraculous cure. But what’s the reality? Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive deep into the facts, debunking myths and exploring the nuances of ECT as a treatment for bipolar disorder.In this episode, they discuss the effectiveness of ECT, why it’s not a first-line treatment, and the barriers patients face, from logistical challenges to fears about memory loss. With candid insights and personal reflections, they tackle tough questions: Is ECT worth it? What are the real risks? How does it compare to medication? Whether you're curious, skeptical, or considering ECT for yourself or a loved one, this episode offers a grounded perspective on a complex, life-changing therapy. Don’t miss this enlightening and thought-provoking discussion.  Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: Controversy aside, I don't understand how zapping somebody's brain makes them better. It just doesn't make any sense. Are electrical currents magic? Do they have some sort of medicinal capabilities?Dr. Nicole: No, [Laughter]. Well, no. Gabe, electro-currents are not magical. But the seizure that they induce is what can be valuable to the person with the disorder.Gabe: So the electrical shock stimulates the seizure. And the…Dr. Nicole: Yes.Gabe: Seizure is where the treatment comes inDr. Nicole: The seizure is the treatment. The shock is just how we get there.To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author.To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Does "bipolar rage" exist, or is it a misunderstood concept? In this episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, tackle bipolar rage and discuss why it’s not a clinical symptom of bipolar disorder.They explore the differences between anger, agitation, and rage, offering insights for those with bipolar disorder and their loved ones. Learn why violent outbursts can't always be attributed to bipolar disorder, and why personal accountability matters.This episode also empowers loved ones to prioritize their safety and set boundaries if they feel threatened, whether the behavior stems from bipolar disorder or something else. With practical advice, myth-busting facts, and a touch of tough love, this conversation offers clarity and actionable steps for managing tough emotions. Hit play to uncover the truth and start making meaningful changes today!“The best time to have a fire drill is when there is no fire. Don’t try to have a fire drill after the house is on fire. So many people try to work out how to prevent rage issues or arguments in the middle of arguments. Now is the time to do it. Not during, but before it happens.” ~Gabe Howard, HostTo learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

ADHD and bipolar disorder often share symptoms, but are they truly co-occurring conditions or just two sides of the same coin? Join Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and psychiatrist Dr. Nicole Washington as they tackle one of the most perplexing topics in mental health. They dive into how these diagnoses overlap, how doctors differentiate between them, and why ADHD might sometimes be over diagnosed.Discover the challenges of treating ADHD in someone with bipolar disorder and why the right diagnosis matters for effective treatment. With engaging analogies and personal insights, this episode explores the fine line between labeling symptoms and focusing on wellness. If you or a loved one are navigating ADHD, bipolar disorder, or both, this is a must-listen conversation.Cold Open Transcript:Gabe: Hey, you're saying that I have bipolar disorder, but couldn't this just be ADHD or ADHD symptoms? You're saying that I have mania, but isn't that just hyperactivity? You're saying that I'm having racing thoughts, but isn't that just lack of ability to focus?Dr. Nicole: Yeah, yeah.Gabe: And they’re like, well, wait a minute. I just have ADHD. What’s this bipolar stuff that’s coming up?Dr. Nicole: It is possible that those symptoms that look like ADHD could be untreated mood symptoms.To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author.To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever heard someone say they miss the “old you” — the life of the party, the one who could stay out all night and keep everyone entertained? For people with bipolar disorder, those “good old days” were often fueled by mania, bringing hidden chaos, risk, and pain. In this candid episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive into why some friends and family romanticize manic episodes, ignoring the struggles beneath the surface.They unpack the emotional toll of hearing, “You used to be so much fun,” and explore how to set boundaries, educate others, and navigate feelings of nostalgia. Whether you're managing bipolar disorder or supporting someone, this episode offers invaluable insights into maintaining stability while addressing the pressures of the past. Tune in to uncover the truth behind the “good old days” and why the “new you” deserves to be celebrated.Cold Open Transcript:Gabe: If somebody's like, I miss the good old days. I miss your mania. I miss how you used to be.Dr. Nicole: Yes.Gabe: You know, obviously I'm going to cut you off, you ignorant fool, is something you can say back.Dr. Nicole: [Laughter] Not if you want them in your life. I mean, if you're ready to cut it off, say what you need to say and walk away, in very dramatic fashion. But if this is a relationship that you want to salvage, I think then you have to be willing to put up a little bit of vulnerability, as hard as that may be.To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Does your psychiatrist really understand what you're going through? Navigating conversations with your psychiatrist and other professionals helping you manage your mental health can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be! In this episode, Gabe Howard and Dr. Nicole Washington tackle the communication disconnect between patients and mental health professionals. Learn why vague terms like "nervous breakdown" can hinder your treatment and how to provide the specific details your doctor needs to help you effectively.They discuss the importance of sharing family mental health history, breaking down symptoms, and offering clear examples — even if you don’t know clinical terms. Packed with practical advice, this conversation will empower you to self-advocate, build stronger doctor-patient relationships, and get the care you deserve. Whether you're living with bipolar disorder or another mental health condition, this episode is an essential guide to speaking the same language as your healthcare professionals. Tune in and take the first step toward a stronger partnership with your psychiatrist and clearer, more effective communication!Cold Open Transcript: Gabe: Although I imagine from your vantage point, Dr. Nicole not annoying your psychiatrist is probably a pretty damn good reason. [Laughter]Dr. Nicole: [Laughter] I mean, annoy is a strong word. I don't know if it annoys me.Gabe: Fair.Dr. Nicole: I don't know that I'm annoyed when people come in not knowing these things or not being able to communicate these things. It just lets me know that I have a lot of work to do, that I have to be the one to do that education that was missed somewhere along the way.To learn more -- or read the transcript -- please see the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author.To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Love can be exhilarating, but for people with bipolar disorder, it can sometimes blur the lines between infatuation and mania. In this candid episode, Gabe Howard, who lives with bipolar disorder, and Dr. Nicole Washington, a board certified psychiatrist, dive into the complexities of new romance through the lens of bipolar disorder.How can you tell if it’s true love, fleeting infatuation, or a symptom of mania? From grandiose declarations to the red flags of unhealthy expectations, they discuss how bipolar symptoms can amplify the highs and lows of relationships. They also explore how age, life experiences, and emotional milestones shape how we approach love.Whether you’re navigating your own relationships or supporting someone with bipolar disorder, this episode offers relatable insights and practical advice to help you find clarity.“Grand love gestures are absolutely my jam. And I know the world is filled with people who love romance. So I don’t want anybody to hear that all types of grand gestures and falling in love and soulmates are bad. But, if you are all consumed by that grand gesture and you can’t figure out anything else but to do that right now, then it could be mania.” ~Gabe Howard, HostTo learn more -- or read the transcript -- please visit the official episode page.Our host, Gabe Howard, is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, "Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations," available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from the author. To learn more about Gabe, or book him for your next event, please visit his website, gabehoward.com. You can also follow him on Instagram and TikTok at @askabipolar. Our host, Dr. Nicole Washington, is a native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she attended Southern University and A&M College. After receiving her BS degree, she moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma to enroll in the Oklahoma State University College of Osteopathic Medicine. She completed a residency in psychiatry at the University of Oklahoma in Tulsa. Since completing her residency training, Washington has spent most of her career caring for and being an advocate for those who are not typically consumers of mental health services, namely underserved communities, those with severe mental health conditions, and high performing professionals. Through her private practice, podcast, speaking, and writing, she seeks to provide education to decrease the stigma associated with psychiatric conditions. Find out more at DrNicolePsych.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices