The Allender Center Podcast

When you hear the words “surrendered sexuality,” what comes to mind—loss, shame, control? In this conversation, you’ll hear a different vision. In this week’s episode, Dr. Dan Allender is joined by clinical psychologist and author Dr. Juli Slattery. Together, they open up a vulnerable and hope-filled dialogue about sexuality—one that goes far beyond rules or “right answers.” Drawing from her new book Surrendered Sexuality: How Knowing Jesus Changes Everything, Juli shares how her own journey, through disruption, prayer, and deepening intimacy with God, led her to recognize the unspoken pain so many of us carry around sexuality. Rather than focusing on behaviors, Dan and Juli invite you to see sexuality as a core part of being human: your body, your emotions, your longing for connection, and ultimately, your intimacy with God. They also reframe what it means to surrender. Instead of shame or control, surrender becomes a gentle, ongoing invitation into the goodness of God—an opening to more pleasure in life, meaningful healing, and deeper trust in Jesus.  This isn’t an episode with tidy conclusions or quick fixes. It’s an invitation to step into the mystery of sexuality as part of your discipleship journey, and to discover that in surrender, you don’t lose yourself. You find life: a life that is more whole, more connected, and more deeply rooted in the goodness of God.

What does it look like for the Church to become a true place of hope, healing, and care when it comes to mental health? In this week’s conversation, Dan Allender and Rachael Clinton Chen are joined by Laura Howe, a clinical social worker and founder of Hope Made Strong and the Church Mental Health Summit, a free online event coming up on October 10, 2025. Laura shares her journey into bridging faith and mental health—born out of frustration and a longing to see the Church rise to its calling as a safe, caring community. Together, they explore the unique role the Church can play in mental health support: not as a replacement for clinical care, but as a vital presence of peer support, belonging, and discipleship that helps people feel seen and held. This episode touches on: How churches can move beyond programs to cultivate a culture of care The power of peer support as the “missing piece” in mental health conversations The theological and cultural obstacles that keep communities from engaging suffering honestly The very real challenges of compassion fatigue and burnout for leaders—and practices for resilience Whether you’re a pastor, ministry leader, caregiver, or someone longing to see your church embody greater compassion, this conversation offers both hope and practical wisdom for building communities where people can truly experience the canopy of care we all need.  

For many, theology brings to mind dusty bookshelves, abstract arguments, and rigid dogmas. But what if theology wasn’t static? What if it could move, breathe, and shape the way we live, love, and lead in the world? In this episode, Dr. Dan Allender and Rachael Clinton Chen are joined by Dr. Lauren D. Sawyer to talk about living theology—a way of engaging God and Scripture that doesn’t stay confined to the context of books, a classroom, or even church, but instead has “feet” that walk into our everyday lives. Lauren shares about The Seattle School’s new Certificate in Living Theology, a one-year online program designed to bring theology into conversation with psychology, culture, story, and community. Together, they explore why theology is never neutral, how our contexts shape what we believe, and why listening and dialogue are as essential as doctrine. You’ll hear how living theology is less about arriving at final answers and more about cultivating a faith that is reflective, embodied, and responsive to the complexities of our time. If you’ve ever longed for a way of doing theology that feels deeply connected to life, justice, and relational depth, this conversation is an invitation to consider what it means for theology to truly come alive. Learn more about the Certificate in Living Theology: theseattleschool.edu/programs/living-theology-certificate

Joining the conversation is Linda Royster, Strategic Alliance Manager and lead instructor at the Allender Center, who specializes in healing racial trauma and sexual abuse for women of color. Linda shares her transformative journey with The Wounded Heart and emphasizes the importance of culturally specific healing. They delve into the intersections of shame, sexual abuse, and racial trauma, highlighting how these layers impact survivors. The discussion centers around the courageous act of naming trauma, fostering a pathway toward redemption and healing.

John Cunningham, a thoughtful therapist and potter, and his wife Sue, a poet, join Dan and Becky Allender for a deep dive into creativity in relationships. They explore the delicate balance of nurturing artistic expression within marriage, discussing the vulnerabilities involved and the joyful collaboration it can inspire. Insights include the importance of patience, curiosity, and meaningful feedback to support one another's creative passions. Their conversation highlights how embracing creativity can enrich not just personal lives, but also strengthen connections with loved ones.

Join Becky Allender, Dan Allender, Steve Call, and Lisa Call, authors of The Deep-Rooted Marriage, as they explore the complexities of marital relationships. They discuss how even small disagreements can reveal deeper insights and strengthen connections. The conversation emphasizes the importance of kindness and curiosity in navigating life transitions, household dynamics, and emotional challenges. With personal anecdotes and insights into the impact of oxytocin on intimacy, they offer hope for fostering resilience and a deeper bond in marriage.

In this engaging discussion, Christa Hardin, a therapist, coach, and author of "The Enneagram in Marriage," shares her insights on thriving relationships. She introduces the concept of Glow Stages in marriages, discussing how joy can be more challenging than conflict. The conversation emphasizes the Enneagram's role in fostering self-awareness and curiosity in relationships. Christa explains how nurturing love can transform not just partnerships but also extend blessings into the world, offering wisdom for anyone in different stages of their romantic journey.

Brian Lee, a pastor, coach, and founder of the nonprofit Broken to Beloved, shares his journey through spiritual abuse. He discusses the deep impact of betrayal on trust in God and community. The conversation emphasizes the transformation from feeling broken to recognizing one's inherent worth as beloved. Lee highlights the importance of collective healing and the role of communities in creating safe spaces for survivors. This candid dialogue encourages compassion, curiosity in faith, and the reclaiming of spiritual agency.

What does it look like to stand with a community through fire—both literal and systemic?  In this conversation, Rev. Marcos Canales and Rev. Dr. Robert Chao Romero join Rachael Clinton Chen to share their experiences leading and loving the Latino community in the Los Angeles area, especially during recent times of crisis. From homes lost and families displaced by devastating wildfires this year to the crushing weight of recent unjust immigration policies that threaten daily survival, these realities are urgent and relentless. Amid these challenges, they share how they create space for lament, fierce hope, and necessary rest in their lives as leaders. They show what it means to bear witness with empathy, stand in true solidarity, and nurture resilience when the world feels like it’s falling apart. Beyond politics, agendas, and policies, their witness points to a deeper hope in Jesus—one that sustains, heals, and empowers communities to keep moving forward. We invite you to listen, learn, and be moved by their wisdom—shaped by personal and communal healing. You can learn more about La Fuente Ministries and how you can support their work: https://www.lfmpasadena.org/

Join licensed therapist and award-winning author Eli Harwood, known as the 'attachment nerd,' as she shares insights on cultivating secure attachments with kids. She discusses the impact of personal attachment stories on parenting and the power of being 'good enough' instead of perfect. With a focus on emotional connection over control, Eli emphasizes the importance of repair and consistency in relationships. Get inspired by her practical advice for navigating parenting challenges while fostering empathy and resilience in children.