The Allender Center Podcast Marriage in the Midst of Difficult Seasons
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Nov 14, 2025 Join Becky Allender, a seasoned ministry partner and wife of Dan Allender, as she shares heartfelt insights on navigating marriage during life's toughest challenges. They discuss how trauma and stress can stretch relationships to their limits and the importance of mutual care and humor in overcoming these trials. Becky reflects on personal experiences with loss and the couple's journey towards acceptance and healing. Their candid conversation reveals how kindness and empathy serve as vital lifelines, even in the darkest moments.
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Extremity Defined By Capacity Overload
- Extremity is when demands consistently exceed our capacity to meet them.
- Trauma often creates prolonged seasons of extremity that reshape daily life.
Small Disruptions Trigger Big Fears
- Small, everyday disruptions can trigger disproportionate existential fear when extremity is present.
- Lack of quick resolution compounds feelings of loss of control into deeper crises.
Misheard Medical Alarm Sparks Radical Acceptance
- Becky recounts mishearing a chiropractor's warning that Dan "could lose his arm" and immediately imagining life without an arm.
- She quickly moved to practical acceptance and dark humor as a way to steady herself and Dan.
