The Meaning of Men

Could connection be the missing prescription in men’s health? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Dr. Henry Aughterson, junior doctor, researcher, and advocate for community-based healthcare. We explore the concept of social prescribing, a growing movement that connects people with local activities to improve wellbeing and address the root causes of mental distress. Dr. Henry explains why men often find it easier to connect shoulder to shoulder through shared activities. From football clubs and gardening groups to choirs, these spaces reduce loneliness, foster purpose, and help men feel part of something bigger. His research highlights real stories of men who describe these social groups as the single most important step in their mental health journey. In this episode you will learn: How social prescribing can improve men’s mental health, reduce isolation and build community Why shared activities are a powerful way for men to form meaningful connections The role of vulnerability and self-care in men's emotional wellbeing How community, purpose and belonging support resilience and life satisfaction Practical ways to find or create spaces that strengthen mental health and connection This conversation is a guide for anyone interested in men’s health, loneliness, emotional wellbeing, and how connection, community and meaningful activity can transform lives.   Timestamps: 01:50: Journey to Medicine 04:44: Life as an NHS Doctor 04:50: Mental Health Challenges 11:39: Understanding Social Prescribing 22:29: The Role of Social Prescribing for Men 28:49: Addressing the Needs of Young Men 38:04: The Importance of Meaning in Healthcare

What if the key to raising healthier men starts with teaching boys to trust their emotions? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Kimmi Berlin, founder of Build Up Boys, an organisation dedicated to helping young boys retain and develop their innate emotional intelligence. We explore how boys, sometimes as young as five, begin trading pieces of their emotional wholeness for social acceptance and the long-term effects this has on mental health, relationships, and identity. Kimmi shares practical strategies for parents, educators, and mentors, including how to replace phrases like “you’re okay” with curiosity, teach body autonomy, foster empathy, and build conflict resolution skills through play. These early interventions can help boys grow into men who are confident, emotionally aware, and capable of forming deeper connections. In this episode you will learn: Why supporting boys’ emotional intelligence is critical for long-term mental health How societal pressures encourage emotional suppression and what parents can do to counter it Tools and exercises to help boys develop empathy, self-awareness, and resilience How early emotional education leads to healthier friendships, stronger families, and more connected men The impact of nurturing vulnerability and emotional honesty on boys’ future wellbeing This episode is essential listening for anyone interested in raising emotionally healthy boys, men’s mental health, and creating a generation of men who can connect authentically with themselves and others.   Hear more from Kimmi: www.buildupboys.com   https://youtube.com/@buildupboys7351?si=Wi9ObA8jXFE5z0tO   https://motherwellmag.com/2025/04/09/adolescence-call-to-action-build-up-boys/amp/   https://www.popsugar.com/family/promising-young-woman-illustrates-need-to-teach-consent-48213626   Timestamps:   07:04: The Importance of Early Emotional Education 13:09: Navigating Emotions: Anger and Beyond 21:17: Consequences of Emotional Suppression in Adulthood 25:13: Building Emotional Awareness in Boys 30:22: Fostering Emotional Intelligence at Home 32:55: Small Changes for Big Impacts 37:25: Positive Changes Observed in Boys 42:26: The Power of Kindness in Raising Boys    

How can we redefine masculinity in a way that empowers men and boys? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Dr. Brendan Kwiatkowski-Hartman, researcher, educator, and consultant, about one of the most complex and debated topics in modern life: masculinity. Brendan’s work is driven by personal experience, including the tragic loss of a student to suicide, which inspired him to explore how boys’ struggles are shaped by both biology and social pressures. We discuss why terms like toxic masculinity often create division, and why men and boys need guidance on embracing masculinity positively instead of simply being told what not to do. Brendan shares how reframing masculinity around safety, authenticity, emotional awareness, and self alignment can help men lead healthier lives and build stronger communities. In this episode you will learn: How societal expectations influence boys and men from an early age The difference between restrictive and empowering forms of masculinity Strategies for educators, parents, and communities to support positive male development How embracing authenticity, responsibility, and emotional literacy fosters resilience and wellbeing Why curiosity and nuance are essential when talking about masculinity today This conversation offers insight for anyone interested in men’s mental health, positive masculinity, emotional wellbeing, and creating environments where boys and men can thrive.   Hear more from Brendan: www.remasculine.com   Timestamps: 02:01: Brendan's Journey: From Teacher to Masculinity Advocate 03:50: Defining Masculinity: Beliefs, Behaviors, and Roles 06:32: The Demonization of Masculinity: Impact on Society 10:03: Toxic Masculinity: A Misunderstood Concept 11:58: Restrictive Masculinity: Harmful Beliefs and Behaviors 15:45: Reframing Masculinity: A Personal Evolution 19:18: The Fluidity of Masculinity: Personal Experiences 23:48: Authenticity in Masculinity: Finding Inner Confidence 25:58: The Balance of Masculinity 27:53: Navigating the Gray Areas of Masculinity 32:49: Understanding Rites of Passage 38:37: Breaking the Trauma Triangle 46:11: The Epidemic of Male Lonelines

What do men really want and need from therapy? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Dr. Zac Seidler, Clinical Psychologist and Director of Research at Movember, about why therapy often fails men and how it can be improved. Drawing on groundbreaking research, Zac explains that 44% of men drop out of therapy early, not because of cost or inconvenience, but because they do not feel a genuine connection with their therapist. We explore the unique challenges men face in seeking help, including cultural expectations, societal pressure, and therapeutic approaches that do not reflect men’s lived experiences. Zac shares practical strategies for therapists, including being direct, goal-focused, and culturally aware of masculinity, to better engage male clients. We also discuss Movember’s Men in Mind programme, which trains therapists to understand men’s mental health, improve connection, and reduce dropout rates. In this episode you will learn: Why men are less likely to seek therapy and the barriers that prevent engagement How traditional therapy models can fail to meet men’s needs Practical approaches for therapists to create a safe, effective space for male clients The role of masculinity and cultural norms in shaping men’s mental health experiences How programs like Men in Mind are improving outcomes for men This conversation is essential for anyone interested in men’s mental health, therapy for men, reducing stigma, and creating supportive environments where men can access the help they need.   Hear more from Dr Zac: Men in Mind programme: https://meninmind.movember.com/   More research and articles from Movember: https://movember.substack.com/   Timestamps: 13:24: Understanding Therapy: Men’s Experiences and Expectations 22:50: Creating Safe Spaces: The Importance of Connection in Therapy 24:58: The Call for Help in Men's Mental Health 27:31: Understanding Vulnerability and Communication 29:53: Navigating Traditional and Contemporary Masculinity 30:34: Stereotypes and Therapy: The Masculinity Barrier 33:28: Personal Connection in Therapy 36:30: Redefining Therapy: A Strength-Based Approach 41:46: Movember's Initiatives for Men's Mental Health Awareness  

What truly defines being a man today? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Richard Reeves, founder of the American Institute for Boys and Men, chair of the UK Centre for Policy Research on Men and Boys, and author of Of Boys and Men. Richard is one of the world’s leading thinkers on the challenges facing boys and men today, offering insights into how society can better support male development, wellbeing, and purpose. In this episode you will learn: Why this moment represents a turning point in how masculinity is understood and discussed How solutions are being built to tackle education gaps, male mental health, and systems that support fathers Why progress for men does not have to come at the expense of women The importance of positive role models and countering negative online influences on boys and men How work, family, and community can help men reconnect with purpose Why fatherhood is transformative not only for children but for men themselves This conversation offers insight into men’s wellbeing, masculinity, fatherhood, and creating cultural solutions that empower the next generation. It is a must-listen for anyone curious about what it means to be a man today.   Hear more from Richard Reeves: Book - Of Boys & Men: https://www.brookings.edu/books/of-boys-and-men/ Organisation - The American Institute for Boys & Men: https://aibm.org/ Timestamps: 03:43: The Evolving Conversation on Boys and Men 06:35: The Thermometer of Societal Conversations 09:45Z: ero Sum Game: A New Perspective 12:30: Cultural Shifts and Their Impact on Men 15:31: The Need for New Masculine Scripts 18:27: Agency and Confidence in Modern Masculinity 21:39: Mental Health Challenges Facing Men 33:37: The Cumulative Impact of Male Suicide Rates 39:52: The Gender Gap in Education 45:24: Addressing Developmental Differences in Boys 47:22: The NEET Crisis: Young Men Disconnected 52:35: The Importance of Fatherhood 01:01:26: Advocating for Boys and Men: Policy Changes      

What if the struggles you face are really symptoms of hidden trauma? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Michael Baldwin, author and survivor, about EMDR therapy and its transformational impact on healing trauma. Michael shares his personal journey of living with the unresolved effects of childhood abuse, including anxiety, phobias, nightmares, and a relentless drive for achievement that never filled the emotional void—until he discovered EMDR, an evidence-based therapy that helped him finally process and release trauma. In this episode you will learn: How “hidden trauma” from experiences like bullying, neglect, or parental divorce can affect identity, relationships, and self-worth The science behind EMDR therapy and why it is recognised by leading health organisations How trauma symptoms often show up in everyday life without being recognised as trauma Practical insights into how processing trauma can improve emotional wellbeing, relationships, and personal growth Michael’s story of transformation and how healing trauma can repair important relationships and foster resilience This conversation is essential for anyone interested in men’s mental health, trauma recovery, EMDR therapy, and understanding how early experiences continue to shape our lives. Hear more from Michael:  https://www.everymemorydeservesrespect.com Timestamps: 03:15: The Journey of Healing: Personal Experiences with Trauma 05:38: The Impact of EMDR Therapy: A New Approach 08:37: The Book: Every Memory Deserves Respect 08:40: Defining EMDR Therapy: A Simplified Explanation 11:07: The Structure of an EMDR Session 13:47: Recognising Unresolved Trauma: Signs and Symptoms 16:22: The Path to EMDR: A Personal Journey 18:59: Common Patterns of Unresolved Trauma in Men 22:51: The Journey Through Therapy 25:53: Understanding Trauma and Identity 30:42: Shame, Self-Compassion, and EMDR 36:19: Healing Relationships Through EMDR  

What does it really mean to be yourself when the world tries to define you? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with award-winning poet and author Dean Atta about identity, masculinity, and living authentically. Dean shares his personal journey growing up in a mixed-race, single-parent family, how writing helped him process emotions and claim his identity, and his experience coming out as gay while navigating stigma and societal expectations. In this episode you will learn: How personal identity is shaped by family, culture, and society The role of creative expression and writing in processing emotions and building self-confidence Why traditional stereotypes of masculinity can be limiting and harmful How vulnerability, authenticity, and creativity are forms of strength for men Ways to embrace openness, self-acceptance, and resilience in everyday life This conversation is a heartfelt exploration of masculinity, mental health, and authentic self-expression, offering insight and inspiration for anyone interested in identity, personal growth, and rethinking what it means to be a man today.       Hear more from Dean: www.deanatta.com Confetti: A colourful celebration of love and life https://www.hachette.co.uk/titles/dean-atta/confetti/9781408362082/ I Can't Even Think Straight: A queer coming of age story https://www.hachette.co.uk/titles/dean-atta/i-cant-even-think-straight/9781444960969/ Person Unlimited: An Ode to My Black Queer Body https://buythebook.online/person-unlimited-dean-atta   Timestamps: 03:09: Identity and Background Exploration 04:57: The Journey of Coming Out 12:02: Support Systems and Chosen Family 15:10: Redefining Masculinity and Queerness 16:54: Navigating Identity and Safety 18:53: Redefining Masculinity 23:50: Exploring Strength and Vulnerability 26:21: The Role of Poetry in Identity 33:18: Acceptance and Healing Through Writing  

Are UK dads being set up to fail before they even start? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak with Alex Lloyd Hunter, co-founder of The Dad Shift, about the urgent need for better paternity leave in the UK. Alex highlights how our outdated system affects fathers, mothers, families, and society, and explores the benefits of reforms already proven in other countries. In this episode you will learn: How limited paternity leave impacts men’s mental health, family bonding, and gender equality The positive effects of early father involvement on children’s emotional and cognitive development How countries with generous, well-paid paternity leave create stronger families and healthier societies Why reforming the first weeks of parenthood can transform relationships, parenting, and even the economy Practical steps for fathers, partners, and employers to advocate for meaningful change This conversation is essential for anyone interested in fatherhood, men’s wellbeing, gender equality, and family policy, offering insight into how supporting dads from the start benefits everyone.   Hear more from The Dad Shift: https://action.dadshift.org.uk/a/back-better-paternity-leave??utm_source=&utm_medium=&utm_campaign=12-08-25-podcast-MoM   Timestamps 03:06: The Birth of The Dad Shift 06:15: Paternity Leave: A Comparative Analysis 09:39: Success Stories from Abroad 10:32: The Ripple Effects of Paternity Leave 14:24: Facing Resistance to Change 17:59: The Importance of Fathers 20:20: Benefits of Paternity Leave 23:15: The Evolving Role of Fathers 24:37: The Importance of Bonding and Relationships 26:41: Postnatal Depression and Its Impact on Fathers 29:31: The Pressure of Returning to Work 31:53: Presence vs. Attendance in Parenting 34:52: Workplace Support for Paternity Leave 38:20: The Dad Shift Campaign and Future Goals

When was the last time you did something purely for the joy of it? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I speak to behavioural scientist and author Mike Rucker about why fun is essential for men’s mental health, wellbeing, and resilience. Drawing on scientific research and his book The Fun Habit, Mike explains how prioritising fun—like sleep or exercise—can improve mood, relationships, and overall life satisfaction. In this episode you will learn: Why fun is not a luxury but a necessity for a meaningful, fulfilling life How deliberately prioritising enjoyable activities supports mental health, presence, and resilience Ways to create space for fun with children, friends, and partners Practical strategies to make fun a repeatable habit, even with a busy schedule How embracing joy can transform your perspective, energy, and relationships This conversation is ideal for anyone interested in men’s wellbeing, emotional health, life balance, and personal growth, offering insights and actionable tools to make fun an intentional part of daily life.   Hear more from Mike: The Fun Habit Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Fun-Habit-Pursuit-Wonder-Change/dp/1529054303 Timestamps: 03:35: The Importance of Fun in Daily Life 06:30: Reflections on Life Goals and Happiness 08:35: The Concept of Fun Habits 11:25: Intentional Fun vs. Passive Fun 13:19: The Neuroscience of Fun and Its Impact 15:43: Fun as a Tool for Well-Being 27:07: The Power of Fun and Laughter 30:40: Finding Your Unique Path to Happiness 35:25: Building Connections Through Shared Experiences 40:55: Incorporating Fun into Busy Lives 45:34: Reframing Parenthood and Fulfilment 52:16: The Importance of Fun in Life

What can Viktor Frankl teach us about finding meaning in life? In the season finale of The Meaning of Men, I speak to Alex Vesely, filmmaker, psychotherapist, and grandson of Viktor Frankl, the legendary Holocaust survivor and author of Man’s Search for Meaning. Alex has dedicated his life to preserving and sharing Frankl’s work, exploring how it can guide men today in building purpose, resilience, and fulfilment. In this episode you will learn: The fundamentals of logotherapy and how it helps individuals discover meaning The three key paths to finding purpose in life, even during struggle Why fulfilment often arises from challenge, suffering, and growth rather than comfort The role of humour in healing and resilience How Frankl’s philosophy remains relevant in modern life for personal development, mental health, and emotional wellbeing This conversation is essential for anyone interested in men’s mental health, purpose, resilience, personal growth, and Viktor Frankl’s philosophy, offering practical insights on how to turn challenges into meaning and strength. Hear more from Alex:https://viktorfranklamerica.com/ https://logotherapy-online.com/ Timestamps: 00:00: The Legacy of Victor Frankl 04:15: Understanding Logotherapy and Its Origins 06:47: The Search for Meaning in Adversity 09:50: The Role of Meaning in Human Existence 11:59: Existential Vacuum and Its Implications 14:22: The Importance of Fulfilment and Meaning 17:12: The Distinction Between Happiness and Fulfillment 19:32: The Second Mountain: A Journey to Meaning 21:37: Finding Meaning in Everyday Life 22:55:The Objective Nature of Meaning 23:46: Finding Meaning in Life's Challenges 24:25: The Three Paths to Meaning 26:50: Responding to Unchangeable Suffering 29:13: The Power of Perspective in Grief 30:26: Universal Suffering and Personal Growth 35:03: The Timelessness of Meaning 39:10: The Role of Humour in Logotherapy 44:24: The Ongoing Search for Meaning