The Terri Cole Show

Struggling with boundaries? Attachment expert Daphna Lender reveals why "gentle parenting" trends miss the mark. Learn the neuroscience-backed technique of parental self-regulation that transforms difficult moments with your kids. Discover why your own nervous system holds the key to effective boundaries. With 30 years of clinical experience, Daphna shares evidence-based strategies for managing challenging behaviors in children and teens. Learn how to "clear your screen" before setting boundaries, why listening with curiosity changes everything with teenagers, and the surprising power of disengagement. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/783

Be honest. Have you ever felt your walls go up when someone gives you feedback? Maybe your partner says, "You're always on your phone," or your boss points out a mistake, and before you even realize it, you're explaining, justifying, or firing back. You are not alone. Defensiveness is a profoundly human response. It is our nervous system's way of saying, "I feel threatened." But while it may feel like protection, defensiveness actually builds a wall between you and the people you care about most. Let's talk about why it happens, how to shift it, and how to give feedback in a way that strengthens the connection rather than breaking it down. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/782

Your mother-in-law isn't the problem. The lack of clear boundaries is. Dr. Tracy Dalgleish reveals why 85% of women fight with their partners about their mothers-in-law and what to do about it. The biggest mistake: when your husband blames you for the boundaries ("She doesn't want to come for Christmas"). Learn how to communicate as a team, establish your own traditions, and stop being the "people-pleasing victim" or the "villain." Concrete strategies for newlyweds and new moms. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/781

Do you ever shrink, freeze, or overreact with authority figures? It could happen with a boss, a professor, or even a doctor. Your heart races, your thoughts scramble, and afterward you think, Why did I react like that? You are not alone. For many women, interactions with authority can trigger strong emotional responses that may not make sense in the moment. Today, we are breaking down why this happens, how it shows up, and the practical steps you can take to change the pattern. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/780

You keep attracting the same relationship patterns and don't know why. Psychotherapist Jessica Baum explains it's not your fault—your body remembers childhood dynamics through implicit memory and unconsciously recreates them in adulthood. Insecure attachment lives in your nervous system, not just your mind. Discover why healing happens through safe relationships (not isolation), how to develop "earned security" even if your childhood was chaotic, and why depending on healthy people is the counterintuitive path to inner safety. True healing is somatic, body-based, and possible at any age. Connect with Jessica Baum on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. Also, here is the freebie link that Jessica mentioned in the episode. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/779

Tired of mixed signals and emotional rollercoasters? In this episode, Terri Cole breaks down what real relationship green flags and red flags look like—so you can stop guessing and start choosing better. Learn how to spot inconsistency, emotional immaturity, and genuine care before getting too deep. Healthy love isn't about drama—it's about steady effort, respect, and shared growth. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/778

You think love is about luck and chemistry. It's not. In this episode, award-winning psychologist Dr. Sarah Nazadeh breaks down her Emergent Love Model—6 evidence-based ingredients that build thriving relationships through intentional design, not chance. From the difference between attraction (renewable) and desire (temporary) to rebuilding trust after betrayal. Learn the A.A.R.M. method for repairing ruptures, why sexual chemistry must evolve into sexual harmony, and how your shared vision is proven by actions, not words. Love takes pleasant work—here's the framework. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/777

You feel disconnected from your own pleasure. Sex becomes a duty instead of desire. In this episode, licensed sex therapist Shadeen Francis breaks down why women especially struggle to connect with embodied wanting and how shame keeps you trapped between "should" and "want." Learn why your partner actually wants you to feel desire, the psychology behind self-abandonment in relationships, and practical steps to reclaim your pleasure and your voice. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/776

Your heart races, thoughts spiral—anxiety has hijacked your nervous system and it feeds on itself. In this episode I break down why spirals happen, early warning signs, and the exact toolkit to stop panic before it takes over. Learn the breathing technique that calms your system, why logic doesn't work, and how to build prevention practices that stick. You've survived 100% of your anxious moments—now make them less frequent. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/775

He's spent his career interviewing the world's leading mental health experts, but Kyle Kitson still struggles with depression, codependency, and self-sabotage. The difference? Now he has the framework to actually work through it. From marine animal training to mental health education, his journey proves that knowledge without application is just entertainment. This conversation covers the tiny habit formula that actually sticks, the animal training rule that stops you from setting yourself up to fail, and why approaching your mind with curiosity instead of judgment changes everything. Real talk about doing the work. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/774