The Art of Charm

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: At this point, if you aren't aware there's an election going on this November in the United States until a celebrity or your favorite podcast (ahem) tells you about it, maybe you should just sit this one out? Robert Cialdini's Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion was exactly that for Jordan growing up -- an influence. But was it also an inoculation? (Incidentally, you should check out our episode with Robert Cialdini here!) If you're always the one reaching out to friends and family, is it wrong to feel ticked off when they don't check up on you now that you've moved away? Related listening from the AoC toolbox: Moving to a New Town (Episode 400) A listener asks last week's Passion or Paycheck question: "Can't you do both?" When the dynamic in a casual relationship changes, it's easy to wonder what caused it. It's harder to identify yourself as the possible catalyst. If you're a no-nonsense type who never looks back, would a permanent social media purge be an effective B.S. cutter, or a shot in the foot? Related listening: Cal Newport | Deep Work (Episode 515) Is it fair to pursue new relationships when you're still pining for your ex? Quick shoutouts to Jacob Brady-Walker and Asha (perhaps our youngest fan so far!) and Grumpy Old Geeks -- producer Jason DeFillippo's other podcast with new episodes every Friday! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/fan-mail-friday-86-doting-on-the-voting/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jon Levy (@JonLevyTLB) is a behavior scientist who studies influence and adventure. He returns to the show to talk about his latest book, The 2 AM Principle: Discover The Science of Adventure. The Cheat Sheet: What is adventure and why should we seek it out? Learn the four stages of any adventure. What it takes to filter the right people into your circle. How to politely cut ties with the wrong people. Breaking self-imposed limitations in our lives. And so much more... Don't like to shop for clothes? Let Five Four Club be your personal fashion stylist. Complete a short style quiz and receive a monthly curated package at your doorstep! Go to fivefourclub.com and use promo code CHARM at sign-up to get 50% off your first package! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/jon-levy-the-2-am-principle-episode-560/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kevin Kelly (@kevin2kelly) is the founding editor of Wired magazine and, most recently, author of The Inevitable: Understanding the 12 Technological Forces That Will Shape Our Future. The Cheat Sheet: Technology is an extension of the natural process of evolution. What's driving technology; what will the future look like? Why Artificial Intelligence (AI) is the biggest thing since electricity. Ways humanity will interact with future technology and AI -- and how it will change our lives in ways we can scarcely imagine. How technology will actually make us better humans. And so much more... Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Avoid trips to the post office with Stamps.com -- The Art of Charm listeners get a postal scale and $55 of postage for free here! Working with other people? Struggling to keep everyone on the same page? We use Basecamp 3 at The Art of Charm, and it's the only platform you're going to need to organize all of your company's projects and communication in one place -- Art of Charm listeners can try Basecamp 3 for free here! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/kevin-kelly-inevitable-future-episode-559/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. In this Minisode Monday, Clay Hebert joins us to talk about what makes a perfect day, month, or year and working backwards to make this happen. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Whatever motivates you toward action -- no matter how lame someone else might think your methods -- is fair game. Think of what a perfect day looks like to you. For Seth Godin, it's being home by a certain time every night to cook dinner for his family -- and he builds the rest of his day toward that goal. Design a day with structures that support what makes it perfect for you. Eliminate, automate, and outsource the hitches that disrupt perfection wherever possible. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text CHARMED to 33444. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Leave a comment below, tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response, or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he reads everything)! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-24-make-perfect-day/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: Sometimes a workplace bully is best defeated by the kind of precision and persistence usually reserved for military endeavors. After all, this is war. Speaking of the military, should you put in another eight years to get half-salary pension for the rest of your life, or get out now and use your GI Bill benefits for film school? How can you tone down your hyper-competitive nature and just have fun playing games instead of trying to dominate everyone who dares to oppose you? How can a leader control their stress levels to keep a positive and strong face for the people who look to them for guidance? Quick shoutouts to Clint, Brandon Clift, and -- last but not least -- Ronsley Vaz in Australia at the We Are Podcast event in Gold Coast. Jordan had a blast with you guys and can't wait to do it again next year (if he's invited back, of course)! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/fan-mail-friday-85-war-bullies-stress/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nancy Duarte (@nancyduarte) and her agency have been transforming Silicon Valley companies into movements for 25 years. She is the author of several books -- most recently Illuminate: Ignite Change Through Speeches, Stories, Ceremonies, and Symbols. The Cheat Sheet: How to persuade by speaking in a way that tells a story of contrasts. What great communicators have in common and how to borrow from their playbook. How to frame yourself as a leader -- aka a torchbearer -- in your business (even if you don't consider yourself the figurehead type). How to learn and master the highest leverage communication skills for the quickest and most dynamic return on your time and effort. The five stages of a venture scape: dream, leap, fight, climb, and arrive. And so much more... Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! Want three free rides up to $10 each? Download the free Lyft app today and enter promo code AOCPODCAST in the payment section! If you want the most amazing shave possible, take it from us: use a fresh DSC Executive blade and Dr. Carver's Shave Butter -- two reasons to join Dollar Shave Club here today! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/nancy-duarte-ignite-and-illuminate-episode-558/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Joshua Fields Millburn (@JFM) of The Minimalists tells us how we can make do with less of what we don't need to have room for more of what we value most. The Cheat Sheet: What is minimalism, and how does putting it to practice give you more from less? How can letting go of things enhance creativity and improve your health? What's the 20/20 rule? Can you and a friend endure the challenges of the 30-Day Minimalism Game? Do you have what it takes to be a packing party animal? And so much more... Avoid trips to the post office with Stamps.com -- The Art of Charm listeners get a postal scale and $55 of postage for free here! Don't like to shop for clothes? Let Five Four Club be your personal fashion stylist. Complete a short style quiz and receive a monthly curated package at your doorstep! Go to fivefourclub.com and use promo code CHARM at sign-up to get 50% off your first package! Hate grocery shopping but you love to cook? Blue Apron delivers recipes and farm fresh ingredients to you. As an Art of Charm listener, you get your first two meals free here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/joshua-fields-millburn-the-minimalists-episode-557/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. In this Minisode Monday, Ryan Holiday -- author of Ego Is the Enemy -- joins us to discuss how we can become qualified experts in our field by sharing some of his favorite tricks of the trade. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: How do you become qualified to dominate a niche and establish expertise in a given area? Ryan tells us how he used the uncompetitive space of universities to promote his first book and gain a foothold as an expert in his field. Tracking verified Twitter mentions of his book allowed Ryan to expand his reach by offering free copies for people to share with their friends and colleagues. Always treat people as if they can get you on the front page of The New York Times -- because they might actually be able to someday. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text CHARMED to 33444. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Leave a comment below, tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response, or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he reads everything)! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-23-makes-qualified/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Kimberly Seltzer (as featured in our Toolbox for Women episodes) joins us for this one, so lets cut to it! In this episode: How can a hopeless romantic stay willfully single without feeling empty? What do you do when your significant other gives you the silent treatment instead of telling you when you've done something to upset them? How can an intimidating person become more approachable? How do you exude confidence rather than desperation when you're looking for romance? What can you do to get your groove back when you find out your ex was hiding a secret family? A quick shoutout to Anavel from EMSI who hooked Jordan up with an opportunity to give the keynote for its annual conference this year. He says: "You are all a great crowd and I hope AoC has some new fans!" Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/fan-mail-friday-84-cold-shoulders-and-secret-families/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oliver Burkeman (@oliverburkeman) is the author of The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking; he joins us to explain why it's healthier to accentuate -- rather than ignore -- the negative. The Cheat Sheet: How does a pessimistic skeptic of positive thinking culture find himself pumped up with 12,000 other people at a motivational seminar in Texas? How can the avoidance of negative thinking make us unhappy? Are the tenets of the Ironic Process Theory slowly driving you insane? Negative Visualization: a healthier way to worry with purpose. Affirmations often go beyond just being silly -- they can actually be harmful. And so much more... Don't like to shop for clothes? Let Five Four Club be your personal fashion stylist. Complete a short style quiz and receive a monthly curated package at your doorstep! Go to fivefourclub.com and use promo code CHARM at sign-up to get 50% off your first package! Working with other people? Struggling to keep everyone on the same page? We use Basecamp 3 at The Art of Charm, and it's the only platform you're going to need to organize all of your company's projects and communication in one place -- Art of Charm listeners can try Basecamp 3 for free here! Whether you're a lady or a gent, you don't need to know what MicroModal fabric is to enjoy the comfort of MeUndies; you just need to wear them -- support this show (and yourself) with MeUndies here for 20% off! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/oliver-burkeman-antidote-positive-thinking-episode-556/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices