Art Creativity & Wellbeing

When my husband Ben went grocery shopping this weekend, there were empty shelves instead of many things we normally get. Earlier in the day there had been not one but two fistfights in our local grocery store over supplies! If you're worrying about interruptions in the supply chain, the stock market, and other factors related to (or attributed to, anyway) coronavirus, you are not alone. And right off the bat I want to say: we will get through this together. How we get through this is how we get through any crisis: by not panicking. By staying positive. With LOTS of handwashing. And by helping our family members feel safe. Today I'm sharing ideas for talking with your kids about coronavirus, as well as the best ideas I've learned regarding prevention and containment. I am a child development expert, not a doctor, so I am linking here to several resources that have excellent information on stuff that is out of my purview, such as: Number of cases; who is most likely to get infected; how can you limit your chances of getting coronavirus; and how can you keep kids from getting it, or the flu. Read on for 14 ideas to help your family, watch the video above to round out those ideas (and check the bottom of this post for the bonus podcast episode I'm doing; should be out sometime late in the first week of March 2020) – and most of all take heart. We will get through this, together This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

Screens are here to stay – which is awesome on the one hand, and completely frightening on the other. Especially when it comes to little kids. It's so hard to know: – what is the right amount of screen time – what is damaging or detrimental – how to come up with guidelines about this in the first place – how to implement those guidelines in the second We discuss all of this today – in fact, we are talking kids and tech all month! Join us as we kick off with a show about the basics: Good guidelines to keep in mind with kids and technology, and also how you can implement those guidelines. Click play to dive in! Here's a cheat sheet for this episode: The guidelines – 1. We all need boredom in our lives. Having digital (or nondigital, for that matter) distractions for every moment when we might feel bored creates people who do not know how to amuse themselves. It even creates people who don't know themselves. So while it might not feel great, making sure that kids have a chance to be bored and need to figure out how to amuse themselves is super important. 2. Less is more. The more time digital devices spend turned over and put away on a high shelf, the better. 3. Don't let tech interfere with human connection and bonding. How to implement the guidelines – 1. Pick your time with care. 2. Put the tech away, for lots of every day. 3. Always, ALWAYS be sure to watch YouTube along with your kids. As kids and media specialist Devorah Heitner says, "there is no safe way for young children to watch YouTube alone." 4. Mind your own tech use as well. Here are the links that come up in today's episode: – The newsletter I did about YouTube, the most dangerous place on the Internet. (And here is where you can sign up to get future newsletters delivered right into your inbox : ) – Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, a great PBS show – Anti-bullying expert Brooks Gibbs invites kids to try and bully him – https://weturnedoutokay.com/joinnpc, the place where you can work closely with me to solve your biggest parenting challenges, feel happy inside, and truly enjoy family time Today's episode is sponsored by the amazing Janine Halloran, expert in teaching kids coping skills, who has created a great resource to help your child handle it when the going gets tough! Listen to today's show to find out how to get 15% off your order, and then Click copingskillsforkids.com/okay to check out Janine's Coping Skills for Kids Cue Card Decks.   Thanks for listening and reading! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

What do you do when: – Your six-year-old witnessed a traumatic event, and is so traumatized that he feels he can never be away from your side – Your four-year-old "really misses mommy and daddy" and cannot enjoy his enrichment class – You fear your three-year-old's "declining independence," because she increasingly needs you by her side as she is going potty, getting dressed, and going to sleep at night – Your seven-year-old is afraid to be alone in the upstairs of your house, while you are downstairs – Your 11-year-old is feeling anxious about getting separated while skiing Each of these situations come up in today's Live Case Study… Join us and find out how to handle each! PS - 50% off the annual Ninja Parenting Community rate NPC member BabyBrain worried about her daughter's fear of being alone in any room in their new house – so, she asked for help. And I created an entire course on handling your child's clingy behavior. This course is a drop in the bucket of all the resources available for you there, to help you enjoy family time more. This Leap Year, take the leap – 50% off Annual NPC membership! Jump into the Ninja Parenting Community and start enjoying family life for real! Click here for details, and to join at this amazing rate! The following links come up in today's Case Study: My conversation with Dr. Laura Markham in episode 255 of the We Turned Out Okay podcast, https://weturnedoutokay.com/255 Some fantastic downloads by Dr. Deborah MacNamara, including one about "what kids worry about at different ages" http://macnamara.ca/downloads/ The link where you can learn more about how to work closely with me, solving your biggest parenting challenges to get you feeling happy inside yourself and also enjoying family time: https://weturnedoutokay.com/joinnpc Cheers! And thanks for watching/listening! Karen Karen Lock Kolp, M.Ed. Website: https://weturnedoutokay.com Facebook: http://facebook.com/weturnedoutokay Helping parents change kids' behavior from bad to good, feel happy inside, and TRULY enjoy family time : ) This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

So, there's a tiny swear, the word bada**, in the break of today's episode… while I'm sharing about last week's hospitalization of one of my sons. (There is also an invitation to you, to join the Ninja Parenting Community at 50% off the standard annual rate! Click here for details : ) – A parenting book about showing up – A new action-adventure podcast for kids ages 8 to 12 – An awesome ninja tactic for handling your child backtalk and disrespect – A manifesto for parents by a beloved author What do these all have in common? They dive into the positive and important beliefs their creators have about raising kids – and being parents – in today's busy and frazzled world. Listen in to this week's episode for lots of parenting news that will help you formulate and live your beliefs! (Here is the link to this episode) Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each Wednesday I send out a Parenting Newsletter, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. Past editions have included how to make it so your child wins the parent lottery (even if you did not), and helping when your child is frightened. Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

Welcome! To listen to today's episode, scroll down to the very bottom of this post and hit the triangular "play" button. Enjoy the show! Recently an NPC member brought up a hugely important issue, and it sparked a whole line of thinking for me that led us to this video! Here's the issue: "It would be interesting to hear some data/facts on how harmful NOT disciplining your kids can be. So many times we focus on the negative effects of discipline – spanking, timeouts, etc., but what's easy to forget is just how dangerous it is to take a backseat parenting your children." So let's have a parenting-style smackdown: Which is worse, Passive or Dictatorial Parenting? The winner is… Both! The worst parts of passive parenting – the lack of boundaries and having any expectations about our children's behavior – and the worst parts of authoritarian (which here I'm calling dictatorial or autocratic) – exerting control, simply for control's sake – both amount to a kind of neglect. The passive parenting amounts to neglect because it is terrifying for children to not have any boundaries or expectations for good behavior. The authoritarian parenting amounts to neglect because in this style, no thought is given to the child's experience, thinking, or ability to reason. What should we do instead? We should try to hit the middle of the spectrum. Somewhere between the extremes of Passive, and Authoritarian, lies Authoritative, also called Wise. It's the kind of parenting that will help you raise healthy and happy kids. "The children of psychologically Wise parents," Angela Duckworth writes in Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, fare better than children raised in any other kind of household." We dive into all that today! I hope it helps you garner the courage to make any necessary changes in your parenting style. Links and notes at: weturnedoutokay.com/318 Special thank you to the ninja parent who asked this question. I hope this helps Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. I just wrapped up a series on "Kids gone sideways," all about what to do when with meltdowns, disrespect, and potty training challenges… Useful stuff! Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! Today's episode is sponsored by the amazing Janine Halloran, expert in teaching kids coping skills, who has created some great resources to help your child handle it when the going gets tough! Listen to today's show to find out how to get 15% off your order, and then Click copingskillsforkids.com/okay to check out Janine's Coping Skills for Kids Cue Card Decks. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

Will you be my Valentine? I have a special gift exclusively for newsletter subscribers… Click here to read my most recent newsletter (all about Valentine's Day) and to subscribe! "Schools are way, way behind the times when it comes to what kids need today," one of today's guests, educational psychologist Dr. Rob Reiher, shares during our conversation. Rob and his podcast cohost, Wayne Yercha, teamed up because they saw a disparity not just in schools, but in children's entertainment. So they created two shows! Live Above the Noise is the "for parents" show about helping kids find, and listen to, their inner voice – and speaking personally, it's a show that survived my 2019 digital reset because they give real insight into how we can best raise our little kids. Their other show, Shieldstar Knights, debuts this week! It's an action-adventure show for kids ages 8 to 12, and differs from most other kids' entertainment by solving problems in other ways besides violence. (It's definitely geared towards kids between eight and 12, it would be pretty scary for younger children! Maybe listen, before you introduce it to your kids, just to be sure : ) We dig into both, and lots more, in this episode of We Turned Out Okay. Join us! Click weturnedoutokay.com/317 for everything we talk about in today's episode : ) Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (This one is about enjoying Valentine's Day when you've got littles running around and includes the link to become a subscriber yourself.) I just wrapped up a series on "Kids gone sideways," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge! Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! Click here for the We Turned Out Okay Facebook group. And if you need some extra support for the tough parts of your parenting journey, join the private coaching community that I run! Click here to find out more, and to join. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

What we believe influences everything: our thoughts, our interactions, our relationships, and in the end our reality. But it can be really hard to nail down what we actually believe. In today's episode I take you into my beliefs, show you how I figured out what they are, and most importantly help you clarify your own. It's a master class in getting the reality that you want most – both as a parent and as a person. I hope you find this episode helpful! Click weturnedoutokay.com/316 for a cheat sheet on how to define your beliefs, and on the links that come up in today's episode. Also – Throughout February, in Instagram, I am posting my beliefs! Click Instagram.com/weturnedoutokay (or find @weturnedoutokay in the app) to see them! Thanks for listening! Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (In today's episode I talk about the most recent newsletter, on the role kindness plays in improving my health, as I have lived with a tendon disorder for eight and half years.) We're doing a series right now on "Kids gone sideways," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge! Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! Today's episode is sponsored by the amazing Janine Halloran, expert in teaching kids coping skills, who has created some great resources to help your child handle it when the going gets tough! Listen to today's show to find out how to get 15% off your order, and then Click copingskillsforkids.com/okay to check out Janine's Coping Skills for Kids Cue Card Decks. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

Hey friends! I'm excited to be a part of the launch of a new podcast, FAM – For All Moms. In this quickie bonus episode, you get to hear from Susan and Sharzad, the creators themselves, about their journeys to motherhood. (Click here for the trailer and additional information about FAM.) The podcast is available right now, so if you like what you hear, be sure to find FAM - For All Moms in your favorite podcatcher! Enjoy!! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

FYI: If you need support keeping your sanity while raising kiddos, try out my private coaching community (called the Ninja Parenting Community)! You can spend your whole first month in the community for just $1 -  but only when you join by Friday 1/31. Click here for details!) -------------------------------- Welcome to our first ever Parenting News Roundup! Over the month of January a theme has developed around here, with the interview and podcast episodes all relating to the idea of self worth. This month I wanted to focus on parenting news that also had to do with us parents, feeling worthy and in tune with ourselves. So, what does that have to do with boys, and medication for ADHD? You'll have to listen to find out : ) Click weturnedoutokay.com/315 for links to everything I talk about today, including the articles featured in today's Parenting News! I'm teaching a Free Online Parenting Class on successful potty training this coming Thursday, January 30! Go to weturnedoutokay.com/successful for details and to register. Ideas and Tools that Matter as You Raise Your Kids Each Wednesday I send out a Parenting Newsletter, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. I've written newsletters on everything from remaining calm when they are throwing dirt at each other, to handling hangry meltdowns and what that has to do with our own self-worth. Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe

"My dad and stepmom are, simply put, selfish and controlling. They guilt me about not seeing my son more often, and usually want us to drive an hour out to their very not-kid-friendly house. How do I find a line of how often to see/talk to them that works for me and my kid?" So writes one of our most beloved ninja parents, known in the Ninja Parenting Community forums as Mama Llama. Maybe her feelings are familiar to you? In this episode, I outline 5 ways for you to get control of your relationship with your folks (or your in-laws) – on your terms. Join us! Cheat sheet of the five ways, plus key links and other good stuff, are located at: weturnedoutokay.com/314 PS This subject is covered far more deeply in the community that I run, NPC. During January 2020 you can spend your whole first month in the community for just $1! Click here for details.) Parenting News that Matters as You Raise Your Kids Each Wednesday I send out a Parenting Newsletter, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. I've written newsletters on everything from remaining calm when they are throwing dirt at each other, to last week's, on handling hangry meltdowns and what that has to do with our own self-worth. Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kaylockkolp.substack.com/subscribe