Typology

Every personality style has a story that includes a catalog of false beliefs about themselves and the world. But what happens when you take those false beliefs and pain from your younger years and turn them into purpose? Our guest today, award-winning personal trainer and host of the Adversity Advantage podcast, Doug Bopst, explains how he went from hopeless and emotionally bankrupt to helping others overcome adversity to achieve greatness. His inspiring story of transformation is a prime example of what happens when we learn to re-interpret our past and choose to lean into a new narrative. 

If we're trying to change a million things about ourselves at once, we're only going to find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and discouraged. So, what do we do? Today on Typology, I’m going to walk you through the daily practice I use to help me change the false beliefs and old messages that support and perpetuate my old, broken story. I call it my "New Story Jar." My New Story Jar contains slips of paper with a new message on each that I'm trying to integrate into my life. I pull one (and only one!) of these slips out each day and work on incorporating the new message or belief written on it into my life. That's it—one new belief or practice that I work on each day that helps support my journey toward living a new and better story. And it can work for you too! What you write on the slips is entirely up to you. For example, right now I'm working through my struggle with fear, so one of my slips states, "Do not be afraid." Another asks the question, "What would I do if I wasn't afraid right now?" You get the idea, but here are a few more examples to get your New Story Jar started: Today, I will make mistakes, and that's okay. Just say no. The present moment contains everything I need to be happy. Disappointing others is a misdemeanor, not a felony. Difficult feelings won't kill me. At first, your New Story Jar doesn't need a million slips in it, but you'll be surprised how quickly your jar fills up. One new message or belief that we reflect on, and practice daily gradually will change us! As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Sow a thought, and you reap an action; sow an act, and you reap a habit; sow a habit, and you reap a character; sow a character, and you reap a destiny." Want to make your own?  Click here to download a few statements you can use to start your own jar today!   Cheers,  Ian

How do you find your “perfect match” during a pandemic? Over the past two years, dating etiquette has changed and transparent and to-the-point conversations out of the gate are now welcome. More singles are making time for self-reflection, therapy, and finally figuring out what they want in a relationship. So, what role does the Enneagram play in helping people develop deeper, more meaningful connections? Today’s guest, Global Chief Marketing Officer of OkCupid, Melissa Hobley, joins me to explore different Enneagram types in relationships and how she sees the Enneagram being used in dating.  Melissa shares a few basic tips for dating and gives two important insider tips, before asking Ian a few questions of her own.   Melissa Hobley is the Global Chief Marketing Officer of OkCupid, one of the largest dating apps in the world. Under her direction, OkCupid has become famous for its message of inclusion and affirmation, winning numerous awards for its breakthrough social campaign. In this role, she is responsible for global brand advertising, marketing, social media, and partnerships. Melissa was the first CMO at OkCupid and brought the brand from decline to being one of the foremost leaders in a competitive space. She regularly appears as an expert on tech and relationships in media like The New York Times and NPR. Currently, she is a regular guest on NBC’s “Today Show” discussing relationships in a digital era. She’s on the list of “Forbes Most Influential CMOs in the World,” is on AdAge’s “Women to Watch” list, and was recently featured on AMA’s “40 Under 40.” (AMA= Americian Marketing Association).

How do you repair that which is broken? You must first be willing to see the truth. We all have broken stories that directly impact the choices we make today. But, when we take the time to reflect on and see the whole truth of who we are, only then can we choose to do things differently. Only then can we craft a new narrative…one that is fueled by forgiveness, kindness, and love. Activist, author, and founder of Freedom Project, Lisa Sharon Harper shines light on the connection between the choices we make and the stories we tell ourselves, reminding us that truth-telling, repentance, and forgiveness are just a few basic things that can begin the process of healing a nation. Leading activist, author and founder of the consulting group Freedom Road, Lisa Sharon Harper has spent three decades researching ten generations of her family history through DNA research, oral histories, interviews and genealogy. In her new book, Fortune: How Race Broke My Family and the World—and How to Repair It All (Brazos Press, February 8, 2022), Harper draws on her lifelong journey to know her family’s history to recover the beauty of her heritage, expose the brokenness that race has wrought in America, and cast a vision for collective repair.  Her work has been featured in the New Yorker, Relevant, Essence, HuffPost, The National Civic Review, and CNN, and she has appeared on PBS's Religion & Ethics NewsWeekly, TV One, Fox News, NPR, and Al Jazeera America.

How does the Enneagram help you grow spiritually?  We’ve indirectly touched on this on Typology but I’ve always wanted to specifically explore the Enneagram as a useful tool for profound spiritual formation.   Today, pastor, Enneagram teacher, and author AJ Sherrill joins me to talk about the Enneagram and Spiritualty.  With two Master’s in Theology and a Doctorate in the area of Spiritual Formation, AJ shares spiritual practices each type can adopt to gain clarity and access to a more virtuous life.   AJ teaches courses on preaching and also the Enneagram at Fuller Theological Seminary, offers workshops on spiritual formation around the world. 

Each Enneagram Type occupies a story about who they are and how they think the world works.  The Enneagram Nine’s story is built around the mistaken belief that they’re not really as important as other people, or sometimes it’s just that other people just seem to have more energy and investment in their own opinions, preferences, desires, and viewpoints than Nines do.  Coupled with their desire to preserve connections with other people and preserve inner and outer peace, Nines adopt a strategy of avoiding conflict and merging with others.  The risk of this story is that they can become self-less…without a self.   The healing journey for the Peacemaker is to decouple themselves from that story to rewrite a new one. So, today, one of my favorite singer-songwriters on the planet and long-time student of the Enneagram, Andy Gullahorn joins me in the studio for a conversation about how the Enneagram has helped guide his healing and growth.  In this episode we talk about: Character defects or defenses Doing Enneagram work in community Finding a different relationship with anger, and Learning to feel things and form opinions in real-time He also shares a special Enneagram song during the interview.  You’re going to love it!   Cheers, Ian

As you can imagine, when you’re in the middle of a book launch, you talk to your publisher quite frequently. One of the things that kept coming up in our conversations was a desire to serve our Typology listeners with some great content from my new book. After batting some ideas back and forth, we finally decided on what I think is a great ‘thank you’ to our loyal listeners…. and that is to do a bonus episode of Typology where we actually include an entire chapter of the audiobook version of The Story of You. In this episode, you'll hear the entire first chapter of The Story of You, recorded by yours truly from a beautiful studio here in Nashville. Recording an audiobook is really one of the coolest parts of writing a book, so I’m very excited to be able to share a sneak peek of that with you all!  We'll have another great episode coming your way on Thursday with my friend Andy Gullahorn. Stay tuned for that episode and if you like what you hear of the audiobook, please consider heading over to Audible and picking up an audiobook copy of The Story of You.

In today’s episode, Becca Stevens joins me for a conversation about embracing the divine in our everyday ordinary and extraordinary experiences. She recounts her observations of sacredness when she opens her heart and truly listens to the stories of others and shares how redefining and rewriting our own stories leads to lasting transformational healing. Becca Stevens is a speaker, social entrepreneur, author, priest, founder of 10 justice initiatives, and President of Thistle Farms. She has been featured on PBS NewsHour, The Today Show, CNN, ABC World News, named a CNN Hero, and White House Champion of Change. Drawn from 25 years of leadership in mission-driven work, Becca leads important conversations across the country with an inspiring message that love is the strongest force for change in the world. 

Do you long to enjoy your spouse over a lifetime but you don’t know how to get there? How do you identify where you want to be in your relationship and what practices can you implement to help you get there? In today’s episode, Chris and Jenni join me for a conversation about the habits and rhythms that shape a strong relationship with your spouse. We explore how understanding the Enneagram can set your marriage up for success and help you awaken to the things we each can do differently to improve our relationships.  Chris and Jenni also explain: The 5 core rhythms to help a marriage thrive Important ways to support each other through different seasons of growth, and How different orientations to time can impact your relationships

This is a first! In five seasons of Typology, we finally have our first pair of siblings….who share the same type!  What better way to explore the inner workings of The Enthusiast than from two siblings who share the same Enneagram number? Raised in a home where creativity and deep thinking were celebrated, Nathan and Joy Clarkson join me for a conversation about all things Seven. In this episode, we share:  Tips for raising an Enthusiast from two Sevens The communication style of Sevens The role orientation to time plays in all our relationships We also discuss their new, aptly named book, The Clubhouse: Open the Door to Limitless Adventure, where they draw on their own childhood experiences and show that imagination is the best way to play and learn.   Tune in on Apple, Spotify, or your favorite podcast player then share your feedback on Instagram.  We’d love to hear your insights.