Enneagram and Marriage

Christa Hardin, MA
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Aug 27, 2025 • 12min

The Hidden Drama: Why Protest Behaviors Sabotage Love

Uncover the hidden drama sabotaging marriages everywhere! Marriage coach Christa explores protest behaviors - the unconscious patterns where spouses criticize, withdraw, create drama, or become passive-aggressive instead of directly communicating their needs. Discover why your partner acts out instead of speaking up through specific protest behaviors for each Enneagram type, from Type 1 criticism when feeling unappreciated to Type 9 passive resistance when feeling unheard. Learn why we protest instead of asking directly (fear, past rejection, learned patterns) and discover the "protest to request" translation guide that ends sabotage and creates real connection. Includes practical solutions for recognizing your own hidden drama patterns and responding to your partner's underlying needs rather than their difficult behavior. Watch on YouTube! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 25, 2025 • 51min

From Dropout to Doctorate: A Marriage on a Mission w/Dr. Terence Lester and Cecilia Lester, 8-7 Pairing

Discover an extraordinary journey from gang violence and homelessness to a PhD and community leadership in today's pod! Dr. Terence Lester and his wife, Cecilia Lester share how he went from high school dropout living in his car to earning five degrees and becoming a powerful advocate for educational justice and how they, as a couple, have been helping those with debilitating trauma. This dynamic duo love in motion Type 8/7 marriage reveals how they channel their different energies into founding Love Beyond Walls nonprofit and fighting systemic barriers in education. Based on his book "From Dropout to Doctorate: Breaking the Chains of Educational Injustice," learn how a trauma-informed approach to helping those in dire need can transform lives and communities. How does a busy couple like this stay strong? Learn also how their marriage survives the demands of advocacy work. Perfect for you as you aim to get healthy for yourself and for those who desperately need your combined gifts, too. Watch on YouTube! https://youtu.be/ipNAK9cBy54 Get Terence's brand new book here on Amazon! https://www.amazon.com/Dropout-Doctorate-Breaking-Educational-Injustice/dp/1514011484 Get it on InterVarsity Press (IVP) website: https://www.ivpress.com/from-dropout-to-doctorate?srsltid=AfmBOortg_k40kfA45eBEUoWE_Y1G6TDPvHhpB8ujEL37J4ej6g-jI9H Find Terence 100K+ account here! https://www.instagram.com/imterencelester/?hl=en Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 20, 2025 • 27min

Creating Weekend Rhythms That Actually Restore You

Transform your weekends from exhausting catch-up time to genuine restoration! Marriage coach Christa explores how to create weekend rhythms that actually renew your energy, strengthen relationships, and feed your soul. Discover why constant stimulation prevents emotional processing and learn practical strategies for restorative movement , delicious slow food pairings, putting good things in your mind, and including something special that's uniquely yours. This episode is perfect for individuals and couples wanting to build stronger marriages through intentional weekend time and families seeking rhythms that restore rather than deplete. From spiritual practices to practical implementation, discover why weekend restoration isn't selfish but strategic for showing up better in all areas of life. Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment is here as we feature Ken and Kathleen who walk us through their favorite parts of it! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Watch on YouTube here! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 18, 2025 • 23min

The 5-9 After Your 9-5: Creating Evening Routines That Actually Stick

Transform your evenings with sustainable routines inspired by Benjamin Franklin's daily reflection practice! Here in this fast-listen Fall opener, Christa shares her personal 5-9 routine and Reddit research on how people actually spend their after-work hours. Discover evening frameworks for Head, Heart, and Body types, plus the critical fitness reminder for those on GLP-1 medications (like Ozempic) about preventing muscle loss. Learn about "Goldilocks Hours" - your daily 3.5-hour Sabbath period - and how to create marriage rhythms that support both partners. From morning foundations (prayer, journaling, exercise) to evening connection (6-10 hours weekly for couples), this episode offers practical wisdom for making your after-work hours intentional without being perfectionist. Includes the 7-minute workout app recommendation and insights on work and rest as well! Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment begins back up soon! Details coming Wednesday Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 13, 2025 • 1h 19min

An E + M Vacation Special: The Great European Adventure Audio Diary

Join marriage coach Christa for a delightfully honest audio diary of her European family adventure! From London subway mishaps to finding her great-grandmother's mysterious grave on the Croatian island of Mali Lošinj, this episode captures the beautiful chaos of ambitious travel with heart and humor. Experience the highs and lows of trains through the English countryside to inside of Jane Austen's home where she wrote all of her books, experience Parisian haircut disasters, Venice joys and navigation challenges, and ferry rides to family history. As a 749 tritype with big dreams and bigger heart, Christa shares how travel mishaps became meaningful memories, why following family mysteries across oceans matters, and how adventure can deepen both family bonds and marriage connection. Perfect for anyone who loves travel stories, family legacy exploration, or just needs a good laugh about the reality behind Instagram-perfect vacation posts. Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 11, 2025 • 39min

What We Find in the Dark w/Aubrey Samson, 4: Finding God in the Midnight Hours of Our Lives

Navigate the midnight hours of life and faith with profound wisdom from author Aubrey Sampson, Enneagram 4 (4-7 pairing), as we discover what we actually find in spiritual darkness through Aubrey's soul-wrenching journey of losing her best friend Jen and encountering the "dark night of the soul." Learn why spiritual dryness isn't failure but invitation, how to support others through their darkest seasons without trying to fix them, and why some of our most profound encounters with God happen when He feels most absent. Aubrey offers honest hope for anyone walking through grief, spiritual darkness, or seasons when faith feels impossible - showing how the midnight hours can become places of sacred encounter rather than spiritual failure. Based on her book "What We Find in the Dark," this conversation provides hard-won wisdom for finding God's presence in the very places where He seems most hidden. Watch on YouTube! Get Aubrey's book, "What We Find in the Dark: Loss, Hope, and God's Presence in Grief" here: https://a.co/d/3fRiNDg Get The Message Devotional Bible for Women by NavPress that Aubrey contributed devotionals to here: https://a.co/d/6ms07oQ Check out Aubrey's Substack here: https://aubreysampson.substack.com/ Visit Aubrey's Instagram here! https://www.instagram.com/aubsamp/?hl=en More about Aubrey: About AubreyAubrey (M.A. Evangelism and Leadership)co-planted and co-pastors Renewal Church in Chicagoland. She speaks across the country at churches and other ministry events. She is an award-winning author, the host of the Together We Rise podcast (Women Speakers Collective), and host of the What We Find in the Dark Podcast. She also coaches women in ministry with Propel Women Cohorts.  Aubrey is passionate about helping hurting people find God’s presence in their pain. She and her husband Kevin, and their three hilarious sons, live, minister, and play in the Chicagoland area.Aubrey is the author of several books, including What We Find in the Dark: Loss, Hope, and God’s Presence in Grief (NavPress, 2025), children’s book Big Feelings Days: A Book About Hard Things, Heavy Emotions, and Jesus’ Love (NavPress, 2023), Known: How Believing Who God Says You Are Changes Everything, The Louder Song: Listening for Hope in the Midst of Lament (NavPress, 2019) and Overcomer: Breaking Down the Walls of Shame and Rebuilding Your Soul (Zondervan, 2015).  Head on over to ⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠ | ⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠ here!⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 6, 2025 • 44min

How Superhero Teams Shine Together: Jurassic, Fantastic 4, Cobra Kai & Superman Show Us The Glow

Discover your relationship's hidden superpowers through summer blockbuster wisdom! Christa (7) and Melody (9) explore how storylines and superhero teams demonstrate the best and worst of personality . Analyze the way the SP, SX, and SO instincts in Jurassic World Rebirth go right and wrong, Fantastic Four's perfect type diversity, and dive deep into Cobra Kai's complex dynamics (shadows and shine) where Johnny's Type 8 journey from domination to protection pairs with Daniel's Type 1 evolution from rigid perfectionism to flexible excellence. Best of all, notice the ultimate glow happens when former enemies combine their different approaches. This fun summer episode proves that your differences aren't obstacles - they're your secret weapons for creating legendary love together! YouTube: https://youtu.be/UkgRctJODLs Head on over to https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage Have a specific question? ⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Aug 4, 2025 • 53min

From Observation to Transformation: The Enneagram in the Natural World w. Dr. Angela Rosenberg, 2

Have you noticed humans learn better through story, metaphor, and the five senses than through thinking alone? Discover the fun of personality growth through the extraordinary lens of personality patterns we see mirrored in nature this late summer with Dr. Angela Rosenberg, Type 2, author of her book "Being on the Wing: Feathered Reflections on the Enneagram Subtypes." Whether we are lively and animated or more calculated and affirming, learn why observation and stepping into nature can help us to accelerates personal growth as we learn from both metaphor and what we can see so obviously in nature about styles of engagement. This end of summer episode is perfect for nature lovers, Enneagram enthusiasts, and anyone seeking to understand their personality through the wisdom of the natural world. Watch on YouTube here! Read Dr. Rosenberg's Enneagram book here! https://a.co/d/2rMRr55 Read Dr. Rosenberg's other book, Nine Perfect Petals, here (flowers): https://a.co/d/2sVNZi9 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Jul 30, 2025 • 22min

Sexual Integration: Accessing Your Intimate Superpower

Discover your intimate superpower through sexual integration! In this finale episode, marriage coach Christa reveals what healthy sexual expression looks like for each Enneagram type - from Type 1's relaxed presence finding perfection in imperfect moments to Type 8's gentle strength and vulnerable power. Learn how sexual integration isn't about becoming someone else but accessing your most authentic self in intimate connection. Explore each type's integration path: Type 2's balanced giving and receiving, Type 5's generous energy sharing, Type 7's present-moment depth, and more. When both partners practice sexual integration, intimate life becomes a laboratory for wholeness and spiritual practice. Watch on YouTube! Head on over to ⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠ | ⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠ here!⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Jul 28, 2025 • 22min

When Types Collide: Navigating Sexual Shadows and Growth

Navigate sexual challenges with compassion through understanding Enneagram shadows in intimacy! Marriage coach Christa explores how each type's protective patterns create predictable conflicts - from Type 1 perfectionism blocking pleasure to Type 8 intensity overwhelming partners to Type 9s disconnecting during intimate moments. Discover common type conflicts like structure vs. spontaneity (1 vs. 7), emotional connection vs. space needs (2 vs. 5), and performance vs. presence (3 vs. 9). Learn why sexual shadows aren't flaws but growing edges, and how intimacy accelerates personal development by revealing protection patterns. Includes the transformational Shadow to Light Practice for turning challenges into connection opportunities. Stop taking sexual difficulties personally and start seeing them as invitations to grow together. Head on over to ⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠ | ⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠ here!⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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