Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy

In this episode, we’re answering YOUR questions!! We find that the questions can be repetitive because couples are struggling with the same sexual and emotional issues… Let’s talk about a common theme we hear from our listeners: Willing vs wanting. Couples find themselves at a sexual "crossroads" with two options: breakthrough or breakup. How can you avoid the latter and instead find an opportunity to connect on a deeper level both emotionally and in bed? People get separated and divorced… not because they don’t love their partner, but because the distance gets too great. The mistrust gets too great. They become stuck in the negative cycle.  But you can BRIDGE that distance and have a breakthrough with higher levels of engagement, more love, and better sex!  We love hearing your feedback! Ask us your questions on our website: www.foreplayrst.com/contact Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How can you better approach and communicate with your partner about your feelings and needs? Reflect, Evocative Response, Validate... In this week's episode, Laurie and George give you concrete tools and bridging exercises to build your connection and understand each other on a deeper level. R- Reflection - You’re telling me how sex makes you feel alive in your body.  E - Evocative response - Can you tell me also what you feel about me in your heart when we have sex? V - Validate - It makes sense that orgasm makes you feel merged with me and kinda one with the universe. Starting these conversations opens the door to vulnerability; The goal is connection, not to solve the problem. When you experience success in that communication, that feeling of connection is what will eventually allow you to solve the problem. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you experienced a state of “flow” during sex? What is the correlation between flow and sexual satisfaction? A new research study by Jamea, E. N., McCaskill, L.A., & Needle, R. B. (2021) found that flow proved to be a significant positive predictor of both partner-focused and personal sexual satisfaction. In this episode, Laurie and George talk about how to find this sexual rhythm that will help you fall into each other, lose yourself in the moment, and merge together as one.  In general—how do we control happiness and contentment during sex? By entering the zone... Happiness requires a committed, intentional effort. When we become absorbed in a flow: There’s a distortion of time - losing track of time, getting caught up in the present moment A loss of self-consciousness and inner critic Have a beautifully synchronized experience Get in sync with your partner and have passionate, fulfilling, and BETTER sex! Check out the article and research by Dr. Emily Jamea, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC! https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/extraordinary-relationships/202103/can-you-experience-flow-state-during-sex  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dive into the world of female pleasure with groundbreaking techniques that promise to elevate intimacy! Discover how communication and feedback can transform your sexual experiences. Learn about innovative methods like angling, rocking, shallowing, and Kegel squeezes that cater to individual preferences. This insightful discussion also highlights the importance of understanding female anatomy and pairing techniques for enhanced satisfaction. Explore new ways to connect and find out what excites you and your partner!

Anal play, anal penetration, prostate stimulation or anal sex.  While we may feel squeamish about this subject - the anus IS an erogenous zone charged with sexual nerve endings. It's also a body part that from childhood that we've been taught is contaminated and dirty. We may even feel shame about the anus. Especially we might feel shame about our desire to include it in our lovemaking and then never talk to our partner about these ideas. We're not trying to get you to try anything you don't want to try. But George and Laurie are trying to get you to have a conversation about it. We want people to see the opportunity in these vulnerable conversations to share who they are. Even if you don't get what you want, there is something important about knowing yourself and knowing your partner better. If we protect ourselves and don't have these conversations, we ultimately have lower engagement in our partnerships. You can help us by patronizing our sponsors and the products we trust: Uberlube.com with the (-10%) coupon FOREPLAY for the most effective lube on the market! OMGYES.com for excellent instructional videos for female orgasms (doctors and therapists receive free membership by visiting foreplayrst.com) Manscaped.com/FOREPLAY (-20%) - get their new 4.0 Lawnmower! And Addyi.com for pharmaceutical help with female low libido.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Maybe you or your partner is uninterested in or uncomfortable with certain acts, such as oral sex.  Both men and women can resist oral sex. What’s holding them back? The turn off could be anything: smell, taste, self-consciousness, discomfort, cleanliness, or fear of failure. But most of these concerns can be mitigated by change!  However, some things may be off limits entirely and we have to understand and respect our partner’s boundaries… How do we grieve for sex acts that we want but just aren’t on the table for our partners? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we’re talking about erotic blueprints. Like the 5 love languages—but all about sex! We all have different ways that we get turned on… Energetic, Sensual, Sexual, Kinky, and the Shapeshifter. Do you know your dominant style? When partners have different sexual styles, they can be on completely different wavelengths and don't understand what their partner wants. How do you get them talking about it and into flexibility, so that they can meet each other's needs? In a committed erotic life, you have to be willing to meet each other half way. Some of the time, figuring out what your partner's big turn on is and giving them that, keeps it exciting for both of you. How can we meet our partner in a different approach and learn to speak each other's erotic language? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Erectile dysfunction is a common issue and can be caused by a number of reasons such as anxiety, age, medication, and physiological issues. The good thing is, ED is treatable!  Anxiety is perhaps the number one reason for ED. Oftentimes the pressure of performing can become overwhelming and cause a disconnect because they are unable to relax. With unrealistic expectations that come from porn and society, men can be harsh on themselves and worry that they aren’t a good lover. Men are hindered from being in the present moment because they are concerned about their performance and focused on the “end goal” being ejaculation. But what is the goal of sex and intimacy? Is it orgasm or deep connection? The goal is to focus on the love and the connection, not the finish line. Focusing on the connection without expectations can be an excellent anecdote for anxiety. If the goal is connection, there is a beautiful opportunity to use vulnerability to come alongside parts of each other that almost never get connection. When struggling with ED, men need reassurance from their partner and know that they will be loved and wanted regardless of the outcome. Learn to let your partner in during these moments and face those fears together, not alone. There is strength in sharing fears and overcoming them together.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What are the blocks that keep us from each other?  Withdrawer blocks might look like taking space through laughing, walking away, or being too positive to avoid emotional pain. A sexual withdrawing block might be a headache or being busy.  A sexual pursuer block may be angry pressure trying to motivate change or wishing to wake up their partner and drive a sexual action.  Laurie and George show the way to see past the block.  You don't have to be perfect but you CAN get through blocks. Take George's challenge about what to do with the blocks from your partner! Thanks to our sponsors!!  Uberlube.com, OMGYES.com, Addyi.com and Manscaped.com - use our coupon FOREPLAY Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Does your partner feel just outside of your grasp? Are you longing for a deeper physical and emotional connection? Pursuers and withdrawers have different needs and fears that need to be heard and understood... What do you long for?  Fulfilling each other's needs and desires can bring you closer together, but you have to communicate and create the space for this to happen. Pursuers fear rejection and often feel like they're being "too much." They need to feel wanted and fought for. Withdrawers fear failure of "letting their partner down" which is why they are hesitant to engage. They need to feel acceptance and reassurance from their partner. You have to meet each other halfway... Pursuers—create safety by expressing your longing for both sexual and emotional connection to your partner. Be attentive to their needs and give affirmation of their feelings. Withdrawers—you hold a lot of power and being willing to initiate can go a long way. Meet your partner with excitement and reciprocate a desire for deeper intimacy. When the pursuers longings are finally met, it can be very healing for both partners. Enjoy the afterglow moment together! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices