Aww Shift

In today’s episode, our guest is Dr. Alex Wills. He is the owner and a psychiatrist at PERMA Mental Health. He is a native Idahoan but has also lived and spent time in over 30 countries, which gives him a well-rounded approach to his patients. He is happy to be serving the community of Boise. He has seen patients in Sun Valley and his hometown of Twin Falls, and he continues to see people via telepsychiatry, no matter where they are. He has experience treating all forms of mental health concerns including Depression, Anxiety, Mood Disorders, Schizophrenia, PTSD, ADHD, ODD, Addictions, Personality and Eating Disorders, etc. [3:38] Why should I listen to you? Wow, that is a great question. I definitely like to go deeper in conversations with people. I'm not really a big fan of this kind of surface stuff. I get bored pretty easily, which is a great job for me in psychiatry because I meet people and they go really deep and tell you stuff they've never told anybody before. So I guess I kind of like that level of engagement. [4:35] So where do you develop the skill to even have those conversations, let alone the desire to have them? Yeah, I guess I've always had an interest in psychology since I was a kid. I've always just been fascinated with the way people act. It's always been this great mystery, and the deeper you get, the more mysterious it becomes. So it's like a gift that never stops being interesting.   [5:30]  Are there any studies that show that the depth of my ability to be vulnerable creates a depth of connection to a human? Yes, there is Brene Brown material available. Emotionally Focused Therapy is available for couples, and the research is so compelling that if we choose to be vulnerable rather than defensive and raise our shields, we can disarm the other person as if we were tapping into neurons. This physical level is where we can actually elicit empathy from others for those of us who have empathy.   [6:35] Is there something people should worry about?  Yes. That hits on a core concept that I talked about, which is that all of the emotions we have are good. For example, if you are afraid of being vulnerable to someone, they may use that against you. Then that's a very valid threat to be aware of. As a result, we don't want to go around throwing our deep personal stuff around at random. We want to make sure that we have someone we can trust with whom we can discuss something.  [7:30] What's the best way to enter new situations and conversations with people? Do you listen to their conversation and add to it?  I think the approach I take with my patients is to test the waters. You don't have to plunge in right away. You could share something vulnerable or personal with them and observe how they handle and respond. If they respond in a way that develops more trust, then you might take another risk, but you're right, it is scary, and that's part of life. Although it is scary, that doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. But we should be aware that, while there is some risk, it may be worthwhile. It might be worth it to take the risk. I think that at this point in my life, I've realized I can survive worse situations. I can get around, but it's scary for a lot of people. That, I believe, has become a barrier. People put their feet up and walk around all day long.  [9:15] What comes from something you don't want to hear? How does somebody give you an "F," you know, in that space without actually damaging your relationship? The concept is that we don't need to think of our emotions as a problem. If we realize that all of our emotions—the scary ones, the painful ones, the happy ones, and the disappointing ones—are all trying to help us, then we can make the best decision based on our emotional wisdom. So sometimes the correct choice is to maybe not say anything and not act. Or perhaps it's to be daring and say something too, but you're going to make the best choice if you're tuned into your emotional wisdom.   [10:40] How can somebody in today's world show up in ways that make it clear they give f actually about somebody? Yeah, I think it can be big things and small things, and making someone else aware of what your emotions are is very powerful. Perhaps you're at work and, for whatever reason, you're not having the best day, and you decide to let your coworker know that, and with that, you might feel more drawn and more human to him. Because I believe something similar occurs frequently, man, and people simply say, "I'm fine, I'm fine." and I think that that leads to vastly more. I think enjoyment, connection, and fulfillment. Even at work, I believe there is some space because people are constantly surrounded by others. If I'm not connected to them, they end up saying, didn't know, you were like that outside of work.  [10:50] So how does somebody dive into that?  When you first start living a life that's not emotionally suppressed, you're probably going to feel a bit awkward. It's going to be weird and different, and you're going to get different responses from people. It's like learning to walk again. There might be some stumbles; there might be some regrets. But then, after you start to gain more confidence, you can allow people to know where you are and what your emotions are when it might not be the right person or the right situation. But it doesn't have to be a daunting thing. It can be a little bit of a game. You can have fun with it [13:05]  Is that related to what you're talking about, that wall she put up to keep that kind of boundary between people? Yeah, so the F shield That's the first step in the five steps of radical emotional acceptance. And so a typical emotional shield is anger. You know, anger is a very easy emotion to get in touch with because when you're angry, nobody's going to mess with you because you're going to kill them. So it's very empowering. But behind that shield are these more vulnerable emotions: you might be scared; you might be hurt; you might be disappointed. You might be fearful of abandonment or something else going on. So the first step is to recognize when you are using a shield emotion and then be brave enough to drop it and see what's going on, at least for yourself, underneath there.  [15:48] How does somebody handle the feedback from people who are showing up they may gauge it as an angry F shield It's very applicable and powerful to make your kids aware of your emotional state. You know, if we come across as kind of hard, we have, of course, good intentions. They may become defensive or feel threatened, but if we approach them and say, "Hey, buddy, I'm a little nervous," they may become less defensive or threatened. I'm worried about you because I don't want the kids at school to mock you or give you a bad reputation.  What is step two of the five steps of radical acceptance? The five radical emotional acceptance steps Yeah, I nicknamed it Ria. So, my daughter Rhea is launching herself into the world. Like, thanks. Thanks. Yeah. So the second step is that try to keep them simple. So it's just listening, or, sorry, I skipped ahead. I don't even know my second step. is actually to name the letter F. Name your emotion. Yeah, just identify what it is. And I'm scared. I'm afraid I'm disappointed. I feel I have the emotion of hate, disgust, or joy. Just name them, use those emoji charts, you know, and just kind of pick a face that represents what your emotional state is at the moment. [19:35] What is step three? So step three is to listen to the emotion. Realizing that all of our emotions are only there to help us—we wouldn't be having them if they weren't there to help us—we can learn to control them. So we want to become curious and we want to listen; we want to figure out what the emotion is telling us about our relationship and our situation. And, you know, Ria kind of flips everything on its head because we’re going to start with emotion and then try to learn from it rather than starting with our thoughts, rationalizations, and stories. [20:35] How do you kind of unravel it now that you've listened to it, as we'll call it? You just want to spend some time, you know, being curious and listening. Understanding what your emotional truth is telling you You may think you have a great relationship going on with someone, but maybe this emotion that comes up lets you know something's not quite right. And, to really validate something like, "Okay, I'm going to pay attention," that might spur you on to ask more questions or kind of search deeper for other related emotions. [23:58]  Is there some consistency between those who navigate emotions and then climb ladders in life to certain pieces,  Absolutely. In my own life, I've reached a plateau several times, sometimes for years, and I feel like I was able to kind of get to the next level. Only by improving my relationship with my emotions and utilizing the wisdom of my emotional intelligence will I be able to navigate some pretty tricky waters, so to speak. [27:04]  What's the fourth step in the five steps of radically emotional acceptance? Yes, it is to act or not act on the F. So based on your emotional wisdom, and your emotional intelligence, after sort of getting centered and validating your emotional experience, you get to decide that sometimes the right answer is to do nothing at all. Sometimes the right answer might be to fly off the handle. I mean, there are situations where that is necessary, but you can make the most emotionally informed decision using the full wisdom of your emotional intelligence, and there are other better ways, like 36 strategies to use for how to actually process that because it is up to me to act on it. I'm just explaining how, when you're a kid, you hit them back so that those sudden things, like someone cutting you off in traffic, it cuts them out of them, you know, flip them off at this point, I can process it, and I don't want anyone shooting me in my car.  [28:20] How do you get to the point where you are completely unbothered by stuff? Yeah, to answer the first part, I think it comes from practicing, from leaving that emotional door to your heart opens all the time. So no F spilled; you know, little apps, big apps, came and went; I'm not saying you're reactive or doing whatever you want impulsively, but you're very present and aware of what emotions are flowing. However, you know, the goal may not be to feel good all the time or not have things get to us. Instead, the goal might be to learn how to feel good. In other words, we have to be at one with our emotions because, just like the waves of the ocean, they're always going to be coming and going. That's part of life. That's not a bad thing. So, if we can accept that, life becomes a different experience; it can become quite enjoyable regardless of the emotional storm.  [31:00] So what is Step Five? Step five is to think the F or find gratitude for whatever emotions are coming up, and this is my favorite step. This is similar to the magic part. If you can find true, sincere gratitude for a disappointing emotion, a sad emotion, or a scary emotion, then there's no longer a problem, because you realize that that emotion is just part of yourself, and it's trying to help you. You can end the war with yourself, and then you will be whole enough to make the best decisions going forward. [32:05] Is there a way you can trigger yourself to remember to do that in real-time? Well, I like to think about, you know, what if the opposite were true; for example, you could use the example of losing a big sale or something and having extreme anger and disappointment come up about that. Well, imagine if you're the kind of guy who doesn't have any anger or disappointment. a You would not be the guy that's going to go out there and get the next sale. So being thankful is like, "Hey, these emotions are telling me a pretty crummy thing happened, and it hurts because it's not good." It's not the outcome I wanted, and so I should have these emotions because they're reflecting reality, and that's going to help me do better the next time and get my head screwed on straight so that I don't mess it up or I can figure out what went wrong so I can have a better performance. [44:18] What promise did God make to the world when he created you? When i was a kid my mother told me she named me Alexander because i'm the hope of mankind  Key Quotes [24:08-24:12]The higher you go, the more stressed you are and the more emotions you may experience.   How to connect with Dr. Alex Wills Website: https://independentdocsid.com/alex-wills-md/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/alexwillsmd 

In today’s episode, our guest is Jason Yarusi. He is an active Real Estate Syndicator and Real Estate Investor. Jason and his wife, Pili, founded Yarusi Holdings, a multifamily investment firm with over 2000 units acquired since 2016.  Jason also hosts The Multifamily Live Podcast, which provides actionable content and tools to build and strengthen your multifamily business. He is also the founder of the New Jersey Multifamily Live Club, which focuses on Real Estate syndication and MultiFamily investing.  [6:20] Why should I listen to you? You know, that's a good question. Right? And maybe you shouldn't, and a lot of times in life, you have to understand the best value you can get so that you can really go out there and serve others. It's fun to meet a lot of people. If we sat down together and talked honestly from us, we could replace where we built a lot of where we are today.  [12:50] Where did that kind of muscled develop? Was it before this construction gig or at a childhood level?  My dad has a business where he lives in lost buildings. That is what he does. So my brother and I helped him at one point, and it was the serving notion that we were just stepping from one service to the other. It was great to help dad, but I knew it wasn’t the direction we wanted.  [15:10] What best way to set someone up for success when delegating?  It's divided into two parts.  One, you want to know if you want to do that. Because if you're going to delegate and you're going to be on a part, and then you're going to dictate every move of them, well, you might as well not even delegate because then you're dictated being the dictator and just controlling every motion. You're going to only empower them to do if you're going to be a task giver at every point. It's not going to help you. so at every point, you hired 10 people but for every single step they need your approval. They need the next step for you. Well, then, you're defeating the mission. The point of delegation is to have roles and responsibilities and trust me. We could have improved at this. And it took us a minute to set up the roles and responsibilities. And we found that we hire people who fit well with us. And for them, we empower them to help us build with the role needs to help us with the roles and responsibilities.  [18:03] Where was your aww shift moment that constitutes a catalyst to this next stage of your life?  Yes, and it was the combination of doing a lot of activities. We were running the construction business and also doing 12 to 13 jobs. Again, we had our first baby and the second one. We wanted to get into real estate; however, we didn't know what that meant, so we did what we thought was right. We started flipping houses started wholesaling and doing some Airbnbs.  However, we were just stacking the construction activity with more activity of running all these construction projects because here we are in the middle of that. It came to a point where my wife went to a real estate meeting where she met someone who was buying out-of-state rentals. And that was when something went off and we decided to buy this rental out of state, empowering teams to get through.  [21:35]  What was that journey to dive into this new venture? Yeah, I told her about it. I told her all the reasons why they let her sit there with them in it. So we do go to different places. I'll go 27 steps, but I realized that is bad. One of my failures as a husband that I've constantly worked better at is that I talked a lot and then answered for her but we need both sides and that's the power of our success here. However, I had to stop speaking and then answer a different question. I asked her a question and then answered the question before she could answer it. So I let her unravel with that. So I aligned to get mentors around other people that could show me just the steps and the basics. Find a market, find a property, and put a team together. But the power of mentorship is that all these little intricacies are in between that can just destroy you.  [26:46] What has been your journey?  It's a great question, and the honest answer is we had to learn more about the relationship, and we did the work side because we spent our first ten years working together. So that's come more naturally, and all of our disagreements are just a lack of communication. It's not easy raising a family and also running a business. Being your boss is fantastic, but you can never shut off. You can spend all your time working and you have to choose when is that on and off. There's going to be certain times where there's going to be seasons where you have to be all in with certain things too. My wife and I have worked at a bar where they would have on a Saturday 20,000 people and so now it's almost like I'm like this is quiet. So our energy has changed so much, that work pressures are always pressures.  [32:12] What is your routine and how does it allow you to take control of your day?  You know one of my goals is that  I'm going to pick my kids up every day and that's something that I'm doing every day. So I get up, have a glass of water, make a coffee, meditate, and that is the first part then I'll get out. Typically I do kettlebells or some work for 25 to 30 minutes and then run and I've done that to a point very consistently every day. And so no matter how I'm feeling, I get up I do my morning routine and I go and pick up my kids. And from there, our morning has now begun. Like I'm focused on doing what I'm doing but not in a way that will ever be detrimental or take away from my kid's childhood with their father. It's not always accepted in society nowadays. It's hustle, bustle, build, grow. Family is important, but your family never sees you.  [36:55]  So in your experience, Who's the right person for someone like this lifestyle? You have to be patiently impatient and I'll explain that in a moment - that you don't want to be where you are, but you're patient enough to get where you want to be because we get stuck in a life where we expect immediate results. If you wish to change your life, you have to stop what you're doing. Because if you're expected to do exactly what you're doing every day, you will get the same outcomes.  Billy and I both grew up with inconsistency all the time. We worked in bars having a paycheck. There's no consistency in anything from where we got paid, so from us, we learned how to understand that there are always more ways to make more money or survive or do other parts of the puzzle.  [40:30] how are you guiding the people you are teaching and what are you hoping for them? Yeah, that's a great question. So seven figure multifamily is where we teach other like-minded people to go out there and buy their first multifamily property. It could be anywhere from a four-unit to a 400-unit or anything. We help them in power, teach them the steps we've done, and the most important thing is mentorship. We show them what we've done that has worked. We also show them what didn’t work because those steps can be even more critical because they teach you precisely what you shouldn't do. After all, we've already wasted our energy, time, and focus on those parts of the process. Then they can avoid those things so they can fast-track to reaching their goals by doing the steps others have done successfully to get where they want to be. [41:44] What is the thing that separates the good students from the not-so-great students? Take action. Understand that getting outside of your comfort zone is natural. We don't want to be outside of our country. We must take action and surround ourselves with other members who can help fill our superpowers. You can do different parts of the process. But suppose you'll try and do it all out of the gate. In that case, you're going to try and find the deals underwrite the deals, put together the team, find all the capital, go out there and figure out how to do the due diligence, understand the construction, you know, source the market, and you're going to try and do all that yourself. It will take you longer and make it harder for you to reach your goal. Instead of saying okay, here is where my focus is. Here's where my energy here's where I'm best served. Here's where my superpowers are, and who else has the other superpowers I need to win and when I find that people can put themselves in a position to be realistic with themselves, where they can serve best they get to their goals much quicker. [45:34] What promise did God make to the world when he created you? I will leave this earth better than I found it by my choices. They are not always going to bthey'llat, but it'll be the choices I choose to make after that last choice I made. Key Quotes  [37:24-37:30] If you want to change your life, you have to stop what you are doing [46:57-47:00]  If you want to be great, just be consistent   How to connect with Jason Yarusi Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JYarusi/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jasonyarusi/?hl=en  Website: https://www.yarusiholdings.com/ 

In today’s episode, our guest is Felicia Romero. She is a coach who helps other online coaches to sell and scale their online coaching business to create the freedom and wealth they desire.  [4:22] Why Should I Listen to you? First, I love meeting new people, so I'd be the person in the coffee shops talking to the person next to me. [8:00] Can you take me back to the moments when you experienced the aww Shift moment that helped you create and build your skill set? I was a kid in School that didn't make eye contact with a teacher. I was in a perpetual state of not being wanted / side of attraction. You don't have to be confident before you show up but showing up builds confidence. For me, the first state was doing something scary in college. My path was going down a completely different way than it is now. I opened up my first gym at 22 but was a law student before that. I have a bachelor's in political science. I took my LSAT for law school & got an internship where I beat out hundreds of other students, and I got an opportunity to be an intern at the House of representatives. I got different opportunities to speak at events. It's not because I'm confident or there's some hierarchy. It's because I choose to show up even when things are difficult. [10:36] What did you do to jump into the moment most people might be scared of? Preparation is key. I was prepared. I had my notes and did a lot of research, but I also know that I only know some things. I also know failing is okay because it's a stepping stone to the next level. You have to also be okay with not knowing everything. You also have to be OK with everything not going to be perfect. I remember being in front of all legislators, not knowing the answer to a question, and instead of coming up with solutions, I said I don't know but would get back with the correct answer. [13:35] What's the fearful thing you didn't see that opened up a more excellent door? People tend to set realistic goals. They know they can make it, but they never want to think more significantly because many of us are afraid to claim our desires. It's easy to go into the limiting belief of not dreaming bigger because we fear failure. We’re scared to let ourselves down and don't think it's possible. That's why I love mastermind. I'm part of a mastermind, I host it, and I am there with women doing big things.  [37:13] What is the unique source or particular part of you that makes what you do different from everybody?  I wanted to help wellness fitness coaches because I was in that space. Someone who has got her car repossessed was not thriving and didn't have plans for legacy wealth. When I sold my gym, I got questions from wellness fitness coaches and made them realize they could be the CEO of their businesses and life. They can think bigger. I teach wellness coaches to hone their core values.  [43:27] Why is it essential for someone to transit or at least add online to their repertoire? Changing our perspective is essential. The online space is going nowhere, and one of the things holding people back is how it's so saturated, but as we discussed earlier, you are you. People are attracted to you for a reason. Why try to resist when you can just adapt? That's just entrepreneurship. Entrepreneurship is being flexible. When people think online, they often think of Instagram, TikTok, and social media reels, but you don't have to be like everyone else. But you shouldn't expect results if you're not creating and don't create. [51:25] What promise did God make to the world when he created you? The promise was to be generous and kind and pour belief into people who don't believe in themselves. Key Quotes [16:45-16:47) The group you're in elevates your level of perception.  [30:10-30:14] The first million is hard. The second million is inevitable.  How to connect with Felicia Romero   Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/feliciaromero/?hl=en  Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/FeliciaRomeroOnline/   

In today’s episode, our guest is Case Kenny. He is a Chicago-based writer, podcaster, and recording artist behind the New Mindset Journal. His drive and passion for growth inspired him to start the New Mindset, Who Dis podcast in the summer of 2018.  [1:10] Why should I listen to you?  I think for me, I've always lived by a prove-it mentality. If I gave you any advice, it would be backed up by my story, which I take pride in.  [4:50] What was the thing that gave you the drive to go down the rabbit hole that many people would never go down? Honestly, it just felt good to do something different because I think I was just stuck in this turnstile of the key to being happy and fulfilled. I was always under the assumption that to get those things life is about more and better. I had to work harder to get better. I had to work harder to create better, larger outcomes in life. From how I've been taught to think, from what sales had taught me, from what relationships have taught me and it was just very freeing. I was like, this is just so different from how I've felt in the past. And maybe that's something to continue to explore. And then of course, through doing, I was like, this is therapeutic. This is my therapy. I was just giving myself the catalyst to do it. Mindfulness is a muscle. The more you practice it, the better you get at it.  [6:40] What was that place of comfort? And did you have those areas where you had a little apprehension to lose those things? I built an entire character and brand around being successful in sales.  I started at this company, as an account executive worked my way up to the regional vice president, and did very well for myself financially. It was very great and it's very easy to delude ourselves with money. Like I'm making good money so I don't need to worry about these little things like happiness or fulfillment. But to answer your question, what I had to let go of was an identity around that thing. But then you know the term of start over, we're very averse to it. Because when we think about starting over or reinventing ourselves, a lot of the time we think about how we’ve messed up and how we are going to start back from zero. And what I've realized is in a sense, maybe, but you're never starting from zero. You're never ever, ever starting from zero. You're bringing all these things with you. And I learned a ton about myself in sales. I learned a ton about myself in my 20s through, quotes, and failed relationships, and I was bringing all that with me. And that gave me a little bit of wind in my sales.  [8:53] How did you handle that? I work in sales and people count on me for sure.  I remember my parents and I love them. They love me to the moon and back. Of course, we do anything for each other, but I remember a comment that my mom made. She's like, you're gonna throw that all away. And she didn't mean it like that, but just that word, and just like really?  So of course, I had massive doubts from time to time but I had to stay very rooted in the fact. In my life, I've always proven that anything worth having is on the other side of fear, failure, rejection, or some type of friction. It's always been true. I think impostor syndrome is what everyone struggles with so it's not a linear line. I'm constantly up and down, for sure. [11:08] Do you mind in your own words, expressing what mindfulness is and how you used it to get to the position of even just starting before you get to the point right now? I’m very passionate about the topic of mindfulness. I was always very cynical towards the self-development industry. I thought it was for people who go on silent retreats and have crystals in their houses. But what I came to realize, maybe through growth or just maturity is that mindfulness is the most simple practical thing you could do in life when you break it down. Mindfulness is self-awareness. Mindfulness is radical self-honesty in the form of why. That's how I've defined it for myself. When I sit down and I talk about mindfulness, all it is is the application of asking yourself why and challenging yourself to answer the best you can now with a permanent blueprint for your life.  The more you practice why the better you get at it, and I always say that if you practice why you practice mindfulness. It gives you two things in life that I think if you're constantly in the pursuit of these things, you're going to have very few things to regret. Those two things are closure and clarity. It's like when you practice why you get a sense of closure from your past, maybe not closure, but more like peaceful acceptance. And in the present, you get clarity. You can say yes or no. [18;48] So tell me about the podcast and how it came to be? I've been writing online and with some variety for a couple of years but I wanted to do something a bit more vulnerable. There's something more vulnerable than writing, which I think is spoken words. There's more emotion to it and that's literally how I started the podcast. So like my whole journey is kind of meta in that I started the podcast as a means to help myself and then it changed my life. It gave me some authority. It’s always like the podcast has always been for me. It was always my form of therapy and then I started releasing those episodes and they started to do well and I was like, wow, it's helping other people which is pretty interesting.  I've done 40 and 50 episodes and a branch into music now and it just gets more and more rewarding the more I practice.  I'm very passionate about fusing mindfulness with different mediums. So obviously, on the podcast and spoken word, and books and writing the written word, I run a business of creating different journals, and so those that's journaling and mindfulness I have a candle line that's sent to mindfulness. Music and mindfulness I think is the most powerful form of mindfulness in the world. I've always been drawn to house music and dance music and I started doing these things that I called dance music, guided meditations, where I would DJ and put together these mixes and those started to get pretty big that I started to reach out to different producers and DJs. And like now I've done these collabs with Martin Garrix. [22:17] How did you get to the point of taking these next steps? I remember pretty vividly that I was an employee in a company when I started the podcast. I did the classic side which is the hustle thing. I've networked pretty well over the years and I know some people who are great examples. I remember having a call one day with this guy. He's the founder of a very large media company and he was like, So what are you gonna do? I was like, Well, I don't know. I told him I was thinking about building something for my audience,  building a product that they need instead of going out and doing sponsors and trying to leave the corporate world that way. He's like, No, but I was like, I was thinking on maybe a journal because journaling is one of those things that bring my iPhone to life.  But I was like, I don't want to do that everyone has a journal, and I'm over here. I forget exactly what he said. But he was like, just because everyone has created a journal doesn't mean you can't create a new one a different one. So I ended up creating this journal and I released it in January 2020. And then obviously COVID team is really out there and they just became this huge demand for mental health wellness products and, I went from making no money to the journals crossing mid-seven figures in 18 months, and a lot went into that, of course, a lot of hard work in the years prior and then the timing and then the creation of it. Of course, I can't owe it all to luck. But, you know, that was a moment that just taught me one thing. Stop assuming things like just because you want to create something that already exists is such a defeatist mentality.  [31:00] What are your thoughts when you look at the world of like social media at this moment in time?  Yeah, it's such a passionate point for me. I'll keep it short. I don't like advice like social media is not real. Everyone's lying. That sounds so negative to me. But what I have realized is that we need to realize the commonality of the human experience and the most practical way I can describe is with this experience of mine. I posted a question and asked What is one thing that's missing from your life? And I've got 100,000 followers, so I got a ton of answers. And I looked at all the answers and they were big-time life things fulfillment, love, financial security, depth, optimism. But I didn't want to just like get the answers. I wanted to see who submitted the answers and people didn't realize I was doing that. So then I would click their profile to see who submitted it. And then if there are public I would scroll through, and it was so eye-opening, for example, I got one that's like, I want true friends that I can rely on and I click her profile, and she'd have tons of pics with friends smiling pics going out. I think that's my heartfelt way to encourage people to be inspired by other people. Be inspired by their example, listen to their story, adopt something that they said that was valuable, but always come back to the fact that you know, your truth is your truth based on what you've experienced and proven in your life. And until you've done that, just be wary of what you hear. Stay curious, and stay inspired! [35:19] Is that a practice that people can implement that can help clear that out? Absolutely! I think any form of mindfulness and course yoga, meditation, journaling sound baths, and silent walks. There are things you can do to get your head in an honest headspace. That's honest for you, not honest in the sense of what you think you should be feeling but how you're feeling. And I think from that headspace, then you can start to make these decisions about closure about clarity about what you want. I used to think that there was a right way and it's so limiting. But I think we could all prove not only in 2022 and 2023 that you can literally make a living from anything. That's one thing, too. There is no right way to be single. There is no right way to be married, divorced, be a parent so on and so forth. I really do believe that and I like that I have proven it so often with people.  [45:12] What promise did God make to the world when he created you? I think that my empathy is always well served that I was designed with that in mind. No matter where it leads me if it leads me to awkward embarrassing rejection or whatever it is the promise that's been made to me is that it's worth it. That practicing is worth it. The tapping into it is worth it. If anything, it's my life skill. I think the promise I've been given is that I've been given a skill. Key Quotes [11:50-11:52] Mindfulness is the most simple practical thing you could do in life when you break it down. [27:16-27:19] Everything changes when you redefine what is possible for yourself.   How to connect with Case Kenny Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/case.kenny/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thecasekenny/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thecasekenny

In today’s episode, our guest is Jasmine Star. She is a photographer and business strategist who empowers entrepreneurs to build a brand, market it on social media, and create a life they love.  [3:06] Why should I listen to you?  I have the unique ability to hear a story and the end of the story.  [3:36] Where did that come from?  I didn't realize that this was a source of power for me until adulthood. But what I realized growing up is that I'm a brown girl and the daughter of an immigrant. I grew up obese as a child. I wasn't the kid that someone's like, wow, that kid's spectacular. I believe that I'm a professional. People watches, dial in, and drill down on who this person is, what drives them, and what they want. I'm not special. I just pulled a mirror up to what somebody wants and can't find the right words and I make them feel very seen and known and understood at that moment. [7:24] What was the transition of going from being a quiet person to being more outgoing and speaking up?  There are two distinctions and that is there's the girl from the hood, who will do whatever it takes to get where you want to go, and then there's the human that realizes the purpose and power and being 100% who you are.  I will do things other people want to get results that other people don't. My approach is different from anybody else's approach. I find myself in is, I've always learned that I will get more genuinely interested in other people than trying to get 1000 people interested in me. And it is the people who I talk to on the periphery that are never the ones who are the most captivating, but those who are the most powerful.  Good things happen when you are not the center of attention and trying to get other people interested in what it is you do.  [10:42] Was there something as a kid or teenage years where you experienced a transformation?  For me, it wasn't a transformative moment. I did not have the scales rising. I didn't have a family with a deep sense of self-love and purpose. It was like a style. It was just a muscle that I realized the people who had the thing I wanted and the power in which they possessed. I noticed that they would do certain things to get to where they were and I thought to myself, am I capable of doing a little of what they have done? and the answer to anyone asking that question is if you're asking the question, you have the ability, it's just whether or not you'd have the courage to deploy against the very thing you desire. For me, it wasn't overnight. I just realized that every time I exerted a bit of effort. I fell on my face, swallowed my pride, and then continued trying again. I just realized that one of the mantras that have carried me through life is I can't lose if I don't quit.  [13:29] Can you walk us through when you started and what the journey is like? I got a full-ride scholarship to UCLA law school and while I was there, I was sad, stressed, and overwhelmed. My mom had a relapse of brain cancer during my first year of law school and then everything got flipped upside down because she had battled for eight years at this time. The doctor said her time had come and so in addition to being depressed about being in Moscow, I found a deep depression around life, purpose, and God,  and I quit law school. I had three years to go back to reclaim my scholarship. But I said I need to take a medical leave because I need to be with my mom. I moved back home with my parents, and I don't know which way is up but all I know is that I want to marry my high school sweetheart. Someone I've been dating at this point, for about nine years, and I wanted my mom to see us get married. We plan a wedding in like three months. The doctor said she won't walk but she was able to walk down the aisle with me.  After the wedding, my husband asked me if I was still going back to law school and I said no.  He asked a singular question: if I could do one thing and be happy for the rest of my life, what would it be? And I said, I would be a photographer and within the first year, I built a six-figure revenue stream on photography. I started teaching other photographers how to build better businesses. And then slowly thereafter I started teaching other creatives how to build better businesses. And then I started consulting with medium-sized companies and in every iteration of this career, I slowly started realizing I have a skill set of breaking down a big idea into small actionable steps. So then I started creating digital courses that changed my life, and my career. My financial objectives then created a membership on the back of continuous education, and then in 2021, decided to turn the membership into a full-on SAS tech platform where we empower small business owners with the marketing resources that they need for their business.  [18:37] What advice do you have for people that are deadly afraid of creating a business?  As I went through the journey of choosing a photographer for my wedding, I realized that I was not making an intelligent business decision. I wasn't even making a logical decision. I was making 100% emotional decisions for an emotional transaction and it was at that moment I realized that I would lose playing the talent game. I will lose playing the marketing game. I will lose in the business game. I can win in an emotional game. And it was the first time that I flexed that muscle in understanding that I could connect with people on a human-to-human level. And then I quickly distilled that at the time I was working part-time for my daddy's church. So I didn't make a lot of money. So the risks were low. I just thought to myself, Well if I can book five clients, if I can emotionally connect with somebody who believes in my capacity to do a very simple thing on a very special day. I just need five to match what I was making at this church like I said, not a lot of money. So the minute I was able to book the clients, I was then officially in business. And so I didn't have to ask people to make a transaction. What I had to do was to appeal to an emotional aspect or an emotional decision. And every single iteration thereafter can I connect with some of these deepest desires and showcase a transformation? If I do that, then I don't have to ask for a sale. I simply have to make an offer and then they decide based on the equity that had built up.  [21:18] How did you go through the journey of getting those five clients?  My dad is a pastor in East Los Angeles with a sizable church and I thought to myself nepotism at its finest. Let me offer my services for free to people who would say no to free. And lo and behold a lot of people said no because when you offer something for free it isn't. There are three reasons why people will stop business and the number one is money. They have a hard time asking for money because they feel like it's a charitable donation or they feel like somebody's been benevolent because they believe that's a choice and a decision. The second is denial. People have a hard time saying no to receiving a note because they don't receive the note as a note of the offer they see receiving no as a no to them human. And then lastly, it's the belief that even though you love your product and your service, you love your business, you are not 100% sure that somebody couldn't else get something cheaper, faster, better. So these three things are the negative narrative that we keep in our minds as business owners and I decided to break that barrier.  [23:58] How can someone develop that kind of belief in themselves? So if you're so worried about people saying no, I always suggest roleplaying with your friends. Give an offer and have your friends say no and then you have to come back and say but how do we get to a why you strengthen your skills by being told no. I don't ask for a sale, I make an offer and that allows emotional distance. Do you know how many times we say no in a day? I don't want to watch that on Netflix. No, I don't want that meal. No, I don't want to go there. But it's not anything against like the show on Netflix, the food, or the location. It's really like that's not where I'm at right now. So I just really put a distance between that and the belief I simply state the truth. There is somebody better, cuter, wiser, faster, and cheaper that will sell the very thing that I am. But the thing that nobody else has is the way that I see the world, the way that I present things. You present that to somebody if it's an alignment and so yes, it's not alignment to know we continue moving forward.  [27:18] How have you in the recent months or years kind of dove in and noticed and looked at the mindset of people or even of yourself and the success that's tied to it?  I read a book a few years ago that had a radical shift in how I did business and it was I look back at what was like some really big tipping points and it was this particular year that I read this particular book, it was called Mindset by Dr. Carol Dweck. There are two types of people. People with a growth mindset and a limited mindset, and are born fixed. I read the book and I realized that my foundation was fixed. My buildings, my emotions, and my structures were fixed. I realized that that was the greatest disservice that I can do myself. And it was at that time that I started realizing you're playing small to win when you set out to play games, you are unqualified to play understanding, it is highly unlikely that you will win, but losing at a bigger game is better than winning at the world's smallest one. Everything stated for me everything said it is still a challenge every single day.  [35:32] What’s the thing that you hope to create for people who come across you?  I don’t think it’s a great answer. It is just the answer that is the truest version of why I do what I do. I was 26 years old with no idea of what business was. All of a sudden, I saw how big the world was and how the internet democratized the way people showed up. The internet gave unqualified people the chance to work their way into qualification and I was on the curb of that. All I want to tell people is that the very thing you want to do is on the other side of consistency. It might not be as big as you want but if you are consistent, you will improve and do well in it. Be consistent, make an offer and remain attached to what you do.  [46:10] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?  I will be a reminder that you are enough. What you do is enough, who you are is enough and what you say is enough.    Key Quotes  [9:50-9:57] Good things happen when you are not trying to get other people interested in what you do.  [12:52-12:56] If you’re not transparent enough for people to dislike you, you’ll never be transparent enough for people to love you.  [26:22-26:27] If you can separate yourself from what you are doing, it will be a humongous relief.    How to connect with Jasmine Star Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jasminestar/?hl=en Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/JasmineStar/  Website: https://jasminestar.com/   

In today’s episode, our guest is Amberly Lago. She is a leading expert in resilience, transformation, and health wellness. She is the best-selling author of ‘True Gift and Grace’ and empowers people worldwide by sharing how she turned a tragedy into triumph. She is a former professional dancer and athlete, bringing a new perspective on what it takes to persevere. [4:10] Why should I listen to you? I love connecting with people. I love talking to strangers and anybody that I meet. It's my favorite part of my whole journey. And you should speak to me because I've been through so many different experiences, overcome many challenges, and could probably relate to one thing or another. [7:30] Can you share with us your journey?   I was probably the healthiest place in my life mentally, spiritually, and physically in every way. I had a successful fitness career doing fitness videos and fitness modeling sponsored by Nike. I recorded a fitness video the day before and thought life was good.  I'm married. I've got two kids that are healthy things. One day, I was coming home from work and driving down Ventura Boulevard, and an SUV shot out of a parking lot. It boned me, and I was thrown 30 feet sliding across the asphalt. When I stopped, I looked down at my leg, which was completely broken into pieces. And what's so crazy is, well, I immediately had pain. But I looked down and thought one of the first things I thought was, wow, this can't be good. I might have to train clients on crutches for a while. I had no idea how to adjust because it would completely change my life. So I rushed to the hospital.  My organs started shutting down because I had lost so much blood. I was in so much pain that they couldn't control it, so they had to put me in an induced coma. And when I woke up from a coma, I learned you have a 1% chance of saving your leg. This is basically like a war wound. There's not much we can do for you. We're going to have to amputate. There was a 1% chance, and that was my glimmer of hope that I held on to that got me through 34 surgeries and months in the hospital. A lot of pain, and they saved my leg. But then I was diagnosed with complex regional pain syndrome, which is a supposedly incurable nerve disease. I've tried every kind of treatment for it. That's one of the reasons we had, you know, $2.9 million worth of medical expenses.  [11:30] What was the thing that made your mind go like, there's a shot, like when most people would get rid of it? Growing up as an athlete and a dancer helped me with my mindset. And so I was like, if I want something, I will have to work for it. I was never the best dancer. And so I knew I could be better if I took more dance classes. So I just knew that we get to define our future, and it's up to us if we want to be resilient or thrive in life. I was little when my stepfather sexually abused me. After my parents divorced, my mom remarried, so I learned at a young age that if I focus on the things that bring me joy, life tends to get better.  If I focus on the results that I want instead of the ones that I don't, then I will do better in life. So I think that some of the challenges that I went through helped me. [14:20]  Who are the people around you to help you climb out, or were you kind of solo on your own?  I couldn't do it alone. I had an army of people that came to support me.  First of all, my husband was my rock. He was doing everything except paying the bills. We learned a valuable lesson concerning our bank account.  We had two separate bank accounts, and my bank account did not have we didn't have our names on each other's bank accounts. So, when I was in a coma, he couldn’t pay the bills because he couldn't access the report.  So we learned to put each other in everything we own. We're both on the bank statements. During that time my clients showed up for me. I needed my clients more than they needed me, and they were there for me. They showed up for me in the hospital, bringing me food and flowers, and then I was still able to give them exercise. I was still being of service, and that helped me to be able to provide the nurses with exercise tips. When they learned, I was a trainer. They came to me for help on what they could do to work on their body. I was in service even though I was stuck in a hospital bed, Even though I didn't know if my legs would be amputated or if I would make it through surgery. They gave me a purpose and allowed me to keep pushing forward. [17:19] Can you walk us through the points where you felt it wouldn’t work out? Like I said earlier, I survived this horrific accident only to be diagnosed with a nerve disease. I had never done a drug in my life, and all of a sudden I'm being induced with ketamine to try to reboot my nervous system. I was doing Eastern Western medicine at one point. I was on 73 homeopathic pills and 11 different prescription medications. I was on oxygen. I was on every kind of pain pill you could imagine. I even had a spinal stimulator implanted in my back. Nothing was working. I felt I hated myself and hated a four-letter word and our family. I hated myself for what I had become. I felt worthless shame and drinking was helping me numb. I didn't want to live anymore, but I was just too afraid to die. I thought of starting a podcast and I didn't even own a computer. I accepted that I needed help. I went for my first meeting when I heard the word, “hope”. I cried for the first full year but little by little I dove into self-development. I started going to therapy. I worked on myself every single day and started to heal. I decided to write a book. I hand-wrote 90% of the book and bought a computer to type it.   [23:30] Can you unpack the book, how it has gone into the world, and who it serves? I had no idea. Like I wanted to write a book to give some hope and inspiration to others struggling or feeling stuck or dealing with pain or shame. Whether they've been sexually abused or in a horrific accident or lost their careers or they've, you know, had a lien on their house, whatever it may be. I was like, there is a way through this.  I had no idea about the journey. One day, my husband told me that I was pacing myself and I felt bad. I didn’t want to be resilient so I wrote down on this notepad all the different things that I do to be resilient and I wrote down Pacer. First I just wrote down the word pace and then I had to add the last letter. So Pacer stands for perspective, acceptance, community endurance, and rest. And so, perspective is something that I still have to do every day and every morning from the moment that I step. I took my first step when I woke up out of bed in pain. I didn’t know how to be grateful so I started a gratitude practice.  [32:30 What are your thoughts around helping people develop like called muscle of discipline or endurance? I don't depend on motivation. I depend on my healthy habits. I think it is essential to focus on oneself. It's so important to build your confidence, keep promises to yourself and fulfill them. You build your endurance and confidence. I think that endurance can be really simple. It starts with setting your alarm in the morning, not pushing snooze, and getting up. It is setting a small attainable goal and accomplishing it.  [36:50] At what point did you know that this is something you need to take to the world?  I believe that I can provide more value than my words and story. I worked with people for 26 years in the fitness industry. I worked them through a process of workouts and coaching sessions. People started asking me questions about my growth and how I was able to move forward despite my challenges. I started responding to several messages as best as I could and I started paying attention to my audience, I decided to open a playbook and help other women do the same thing as me except for the mistakes that I've made and the money I've wasted along the way.  [45:37] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?  That I would always make people feel loved, welcome, and accepted.    How to connect with Amberly Lago  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amberlylagomotivation/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AmberlyLagoSpeaker/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/amberlylago/with_replies  

In today’s episode, our guest is Corey Yeager. He has navigated his ups and downs. He is a licensed marriage and family therapist, meaning he spends more time with people. He used to have a tie.  [4:00] Why Should I Listen to you?  It will be intentional if I try to talk to you. You should also speak to me because you might sense I have wisdom in my conversation. I would jump into curiosity about your life. My life is to be curious about people’s lives, not change anyone’s life.  [5:06] Where do you see wisdom coming from?  My grandmother, who died at the age of 96 years, had a sixth-grade education but was the wisest person in the world. She taught me the process and gift of discernment, which I utilized in my life. She taught me the difference between wisdom and knowledge. Knowledge is gaining information, while wisdom is the application thereof. It is how I take my information and apply it to benefit myself and others around me. Knowledge is just something on a shelf, but if it’s utilized well, it is wisdom. That’s how I see it.   [7:12] Where did curiosity come into your life?  I think I have always been curious, and I will have to relate this to my grandmother. When I was ten, she took me to her side and told me I had the same gift as hers: the gift of discernment. She began to teach me what wisdom is. She told me to pay attention to what people are doing, be curious, watch and don’t tell anybody you’re doing it, and see if I can predict what’s going to happen with that situation, and I have done that my whole life. I watch people, sit back and watch how events will unfold in their life. So curiosity has grown in my life since a very young age, and I utilize it in everything, and I think it serves me well.  [9:50] How do you handle people that are close to you but don’t listen to you?  I am not sure I can help with forcing anything at all. I think I’ve settled on saying that it’s not my job to convince you to do something or not. I will give you my version, and you can choose to do whatever you want. You can choose to ignore me, and I will watch the situation while you look at me and tell me I was right.  [11:00] How did you become a marriage and family therapist?  I went to Long Beach State and played football. I thought I would be a multi-millionaire offensive guard in the NFL. I had no degree, nor did I have anything to fall back on. I had a friend who bonded well with each other; after football, I met my wife. She saw something in me that was invincible to me, and she kept drawing it out. I followed her lead, went back to school, and fell in love with the academic ground. I got my degree in psychology, went back to school for my master's, and ultimately Ph.D. at the University Of Minnesota. So I kind of fell in love with that rap out. Meanwhile, as I got my master’s degree, I became a therapist and deeply fell in love with the therapeutic adventure-engaging and supporting others. I wanted to be in the helping profession, and it drew me to people. I got to hear people’s stories, experiences, and feedback. That drew me into it and sustained me because I want to be in the helping space.  [13:30] What’s the state of the world’s family base right now?  I think it’s ever-shifting and ever-evolving, so if the state of the family and how we see it is evolving. We will miss a lot if we have the same mindset that we had 40 years ago. So we have to grow with thinking along with the family. The family by choice is something nobody talked about 40-50 years ago, but if I choose to have you as my brother. That is just as strong a bond as if we were biologically connected because I chose you as my brother. So this family evolution begs us to evolve our thinking with it as well. If we also see the importance of a nuclear family as a family unit, that's a unit. There is no normal when you talk about family. It is only normal within the family. If you start to compare families, it becomes abnormal. So if we can understand that the most critical family is my family and if I can finalize and stand on what normal means for us, I don’t have to compare because it’s not my job. If I can make my unit understand how I operate.  [16:00] How do individuals affect the collective family? I think it starts with the concept that the sum is greater than the whole and is greater than the sum of its parts. Individuals are critically important. In the book I’m currently doing, I talk about individuals better understanding themselves. If you as an individual understand yourself, you become a better husband, friend, brother, and so on. So the understanding and curiosity we should have within the individual serve the greater whole. Make sure you understand yourself. The individual is important, but that whole line moving together in unison is much more important than an individual. But it doesn’t diminish the importance of that individual either. One of the struggles is that multiple agendas are competing.  [19:10]  How does somebody get to know themselves?  Just like getting to know another individual. You see other individuals by spending time with them, learning their quirks, learning what they like, where you blend with them, and so on. Knowing the self is quite similar. You have to spend time with yourself to know yourself. Before I can be a good husband and dad, I have to be a good Quarry for Corey. So working to understand myself, becoming aware of how I see the world, and how I develop the system that I move with is essential because, too often, we get value systems implanted in us, and we don’t question them for the rest of our lives. Leaning in to understand better and be curious about who we are and how we came to be who we are is essential. It does a great job of serving us in our relationships with others if we can improve ourselves.  [22:58] How did you balance that with being self-deprecating?  I think this self-deprecation is a space that serves us best with others. I'm self-deprecating with people, and I think it’s a move to be one down with people. It diminishes on purpose. I seek to reduce myself in this conversation with you because I want to be down. After all,  if we’re own down, others will be able to engage.  [28:22] What prompted you to write this book, and who is the book for?  I think the book is for anywhere from a kid from age 13 because I wrote in a way that a young person can get a hold of something. It can be served throughout the lifespan. I think this was inspired by a documentary I did with De Mar DeRozan, one of my dogs that I sincerely liked in league with Oprah Winfrey and Prince Harry. I had said that I wanted to write a book while running my Ph.D. program, and part of me thought of what I was attacking with it. But then, i said, let the reader find you. It will be better if it finds you. The book came to see me because I did what I was supposed to do when it found me. The inspiration built over time as I began constructing therapeutic support, working in the NBA. I think that’s what inspired me to write the book. I think the book is excellent for athletes because athletes have been sold a bill of goods that they should be something. You can do a lot of things. Also, if you are an individual that seeks to know yourself better, the book is definitely for you.  [37:44] How do you navigate the challenges of becoming who you want to be?  You just described a concept in the psychological realm called negative self-talk. Negative conversations move in an echo, pushing out the opportunity for the echo chamber to be full of positivity. So like the book is saying, you do whatever you like with it. It is terrible if you can't figure out what you want as a man. You have to be aware of what’s wrong, and then you can start to make a shift.  [48:26] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?  This is going to be a cat that will be in your corner. If you engage with him, you won't have to wait a long time before you can figure out if you can trust him or not.  Key Quotes [34:04-34:06] According to Nelson Mandela, we never lose. We either win or learn. [40:20-40:22] To be you is to be the authentic you, unashamed    How to connect with Corey Yeager Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drcoreyyeager/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drcoreyyeager/     Twitter: https://twitter.com/drcoreyyeager 

In this episode, our guest is Susie Moore. She is a confidence coach who helps people love their temporary, fleeting life. She is also the author of three books. Everybody who is bright and joyful has had some bad times. Today, we will go through her bad times and how she has been able to make successful shifts.  [1:45] Why should I listen to you?  Do you want to feel better? Hang out with me. My foundational intention everywhere I go is to be an uplifter, so if somebody approaches me, I take them seriously.  [3:45] Can you guide us through the journey that allowed this mentality?  We teach what we need to learn and write the books we need to read. When I was growing up, I had a lot of changes. I grew up with my mom and sisters and saw a lot of chaos. There were constant changes. If you have been abused or have an addiction, you will know what you experienced is about humans not feeling safe about how tomorrow will turn out. As a young adult, I thought I would get a job, have a husband and live a normal life. I thought I would figure out everything in my twenties. I was cool at first, making 500k a year. I got married and divorced. I got married to a new husband, but I was constantly feeling anxious at any moment. I was unable to take a breath, and I think this is very common for a lot of people. We try to control things. We are scared about how things are not in place, and I just don’t look at life from that perspective anymore. Knowing that this is safe and I consciously tune into it, it’s helping me, and there is no going back.  [7:25] Did you ever feel like you didn’t deserve the success you have?  Yes. First, when we grow up with a lot of anxiety and change. We can create expectations in our lives that are familiar. Even if it’s not good, we are comfortable because we are used to it. Secondly, I allowed myself to enjoy whatever it is I create. You need the courage to be happy. Maybe everything good that is happening, I can want while solving other problems. We can look at our background, but it should not be an excuse not to create something different for ourselves. You can choose to decide what your life will be, and for me, this is where the real magic starts from. There is magic available for you to be robust and create something different. What do I believe about this situation? Is it true? What else is true? I look at my younger self and just want to hug her. I have met a lot of women who use the word tierce, and strong but what about a relaxed woman? You can achieve big things in that way too.  [13:22] How did you figure out navigating your experiences, and why did you start teaching others?   I remember when a lady asked a guest speaker how he’s always available for events despite his busy schedule, and he said well, my body is busy, but my mind is still, and I saw that as a revolution. It’s possible. It’s just that we don’t think it’s available. The one calm, simple practice that allows me to retain my steadiness when I experience a negative emotion in my body, I always ask myself what I believe at that moment. Because at that moment, I’m rejecting reality. I think something is wrong or needs to be fixed, but whatever it is, I ask myself what I believe in that situation, whether it is positive or negative, and then like a detective, I will lovingly look to if something is wrong.  [18:42] What’s the first time that happened to you?  I remember having a coworker always flying off the handles when the management changed things. Whenever there is something wrong, she’s always like a machine gun. I was curious about it and noticed her when she was stressed. Through that, I began seeing how I act when stressed. It’s possible to have different reactions to things; through that, I became obsessed with learning different responses. In relationships, I was like, maybe there is something I can pay attention to and see what I’m creating. I have a relaxed husband who helped me get through my fears of something going wrong in my marriage. Sometimes, we are just not paying attention and learning by paying attention to things. I just want to live life and be happy at all times.  [22:35] Do you have a big goal in life?  I have goals, and I remember working towards them. I do my best because my dreams are apparent. What I know is that the actual accomplishments are very short-lived. Whether it's your wedding day or you just got a new job, these moments are important but short-lived. Life is the same. The actual win we get, we become so used to them that it doesn't make us happy as we think it should. So I think about different situations in my life-being present, being available, having great relationships, being silly, trusting my intuition, and being spontaneous. At this stage in life, I've promised myself to be at peace with myself no matter what happens.  [26:00] Do you mind sharing what your book is about and who it is meant for?  The book is a sensual collection of chapters talking about different topics. I speak about grief, the need to defend yourself, strange family relationships, divorce, etc. I said of the reality of living. It is different for everybody, but I speak about my story, which is present in everybody’s story. I shared so many different experiences that revolved around different things. I looked into different problems and different solutions for them. For example, I shared a lady's predicament of not enjoying her marriage, and I gave her different solutions-maybe. You need a little spice in your sex life. Maybe you must stop being too serious and playful with your partner. Various solutions are always available, and I'm obsessed with getting whatever I want. I almost don't care about what happens, even though I care. You are not moved by other boats lurking around you at this stage. Don't let one person be the reason why you are happy.  [45:34] Where can I send people to learn more about you? I have this podcast where we speak about things that can help you improve that we don't even realize. I do daily episodes of about 5 to + minutes, and you can listen when making a coffee or having your skincare routine.  [46:19] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?  I believe that we have something to contribute, which is exceptionally unique and essential, and I think the promise is that whatever happens, I can still have a good time.  Key Quotes [22:13-22:16] Don’t care too much about goals that you ignore your happiness. [42:35-42:37] There are no straight lines in nature How to connect with Susie Moore Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susie.moore Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/susiemoore.writer

In this episode, our guest is Josh Whalen. He is the CEO and founder of Joiwellness. His story is about saving his marriage and how he found a passion for helping others save their marriage. Today, we will learn about his aww shift, how it's shaped his life, and how we can learn from his personal experiences.  [4:30] Why should I listen to you?  Whether on a podcast show or a coffee shop, or we are running into each other for the first time, I think I’m an honest, authentic guy, either good, better, or ugly. [5:21] Can you guide us through your journey to this point?  We have two versions of our brand. We have the men’s side, books, and joy on the women’s side. Stepping back to how the company started was my struggle. I’m one of the men whose wife told him to get his shit together or he’s going to receive a divorce letter, and mine happen to be my sex drive. I was in my early thirties trying to figure out why. I went through my journey, which was a challenging and exciting story. And I finally figured out what hormones, testosterone, are and how important it is for men. I found that there are more accessible ways for many women to get therapists, and that's how my brand was born.  [7:33] How did you find a solution to this?  I have been an entrepreneur in healthcare for 14 years. I like business, adventure, creating, and solving problems. As my struggle started, our clinic shut down for about seven solid months. As that happened, I knew I had to find a way out, and it felt amazing. It changed my life, my wife, my children, and my marriage. With business failing and a lot happening, I had to take advantage of it. I was driven to save other men because I knew I was not the only one going through that. I hate divorce, and luckily, what our company does now keeps divorce. I saw massive opportunities, and it was indeed a combination of many things.  [10:33] What was the initial point of doing this entrepreneur thing?  There are quite a few. One is compliance, knowing health care. This is not my first time in the healthcare industry. Also, knowing that you need a license in each state, a DEA to prescribe and control substances. Everybody knows that we are different. We don’t sell pills alone. We solve the problems from the inside out, but if you need pills, we can help solve those issues. But we are genuinely here to optimize individuals and solve those problems from the inside out. It is a challenge, and you have to conduct in-depth research, and we do that regularly. It allows us to build a solid rapport with our patients, and we do nothing less than 30 minutes call with each patient. So many chemical reactions in our bodies tell us how to act or feel every day.  [15:40] What are the physical benefits of having a sex drive? If I look at the testosterone rate, there is an optimal range, and you don’t want to be on that side. Both the low and high have significant health ramifications. We evolve on what we know about optimal testosterone and how it helps with the heart, energy level, cholesterol, and mood swings. Uch is a pol tool, and we are still evolving to it.  [16:35] How do you know how much is low and how much is high?  This is the kind of issue I have with western medicine. Everything in terms of what we know now is a range; we are based on that range of many other individuals in our general market. For example, healthy testosterone starts from 300 to 1000, and you know when your levels are good or bad. I can tell you that there is a massive difference between 300 and 1000. What we try to do is take a lot of symptoms-based questions and combine them with verifications and confirmation of blood. Most of our guys are somewhere between 700 and 11000 regularly. We don’t like to see people because of what the general population defines. We want the best for every guy out there.  [18:35] How does somebody know when to make this decision?  I think that decisions lie with every individual. I look at testosterone in two buckets: needs and wants. Some guys are genuinely on a spectrum, and some may not feel themselves. Maybe they’ve gained some belly fat, are not working out as much as they want, and so on. You know your body, and sometimes your partner might know you better than you know yourself. She might be giving you these nudges. That happens to me; I think it's an individual or family decision. In my own opinion, there is a lot that goes on with masculinity. We are not taking care of ourselves, and that’s because we are being taught to toughen up, and I think we need to start talking about it more.  [33:10] How did the joi concept come, by the way? To dive back into my own story and why my testosterone level dropped, my wife and I had four miscarriages in about four years. Little do people know that when a woman goes through this process of having kids, the men’s hormones change automatically. I went through the process of trying to make things work. My wife conceived and breastfed the child and wanted to return to her regular version. She saw that my progress with me was not as efficient as before. My wife is a phenomenal part of the business now. Women resolve 80% of healthcare issues, a combination of our struggles.  [40:32] What’s the process people go through, whether with you or somebody else?  I will put them in two different categories. You should start with a lab to determine where you are and begin with one-on-one coaching sessions, and then, at that point, you can collect or determine what is best for you. Our process is easy. They will ask you questions, and then our team will contact you. Then, we will set you up on lab and s, video call, and determine if you are the right candidate for the therapy and drugs. If it requires injection, we also help you make that decision.  [42:45] What promise did God make to the world when he created you? To get the authentic side of me.  Key Quotes [26:08-26:10] We need someone to talk to, whether it’s your guy, wife, or a random person.  [28:40-28:43] The more you do something, the better you feel at it.  How to connect with Josh Whalen Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/whalen_joshua/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/getblokes/videos/our-founder-josh-whalen- .

In today's episode, our guest is Jason Harris. He is the co-founder and CEO of the award-winning creative advertising agency- Mekanism and the co-founder of the creative alliance. He is also the author of a National best-seller, the Soulful Art of Persuasion, and today we will be unraveling how he has been able to make aww shifts happen for himself.  [3:13] Why should I listen to you? I think I have a read on people and give quality sound-based advice based on each individual's experience. [4:05] What made you comfortable about giving quality advice to others?  I've gone through a lot of personal and professional experience. I have done a lot of therapy and love mentoring people. One belief I discussed in my book is that every interaction with someone is meaningful. That's my mindset when interacting with anyone.  [5:15] What were the lessons that taught you that?  When I started as an entrepreneur, I hoarded my contacts. The way you network with people, the way you connect with people, and the way you look out for people. Everyone wants to succeed. It should not be about your success only but your network's success. It's about your community's success. That idea boomerangs effect of giving things freely to others, whether it's advice, counsel, connections, or mentoring. You're giving something to someone but getting something back when you do that. You're getting the power of influence and giving, which is good for your soul and spirit. It was a learned skill for me. I had to practice generosity until it became a habit, which has done so much for me.  [8:15] How did Jason develop as a human to eventually become a CEO in life? Many still struggle with figuring out their passion and what they want to do. I was fortunate because I was a high school kid and knew I wanted to go into advertising. I knew my passion, enabling me to work in other companies. I'd carry a notebook and learn from the people who managed the company and me. I knew I was an entrepreneur at heart. I was eager to learn from other entrepreneurs before starting my company. When I set up my company 17 years ago, I set up values that the company would uphold. I didn't know I would become the world's best CEO, but I see how you treat people and how they feel at your company is essential. That was the culture.  It's about talent and culture, which served me well. I also believe that the other most important thing in leadership is transparency. When things are good and evil, changes you have to make, where you want to go, and what the vision is-the more, you talk to the company along the way, bring them up to speed, not taking decisions with people beyond closed doors. That's transparency.  [10:55] How did you get to the point where you feel comfortable opening up to others in your company? I think you have to get over your ego. There is an old-school leadership style where you always feel like you're totally in control, but I don't think that resonates today. I think what resonates today is being honest about problems you're going through in the company. You can have a plan on how to get through it, but everybody responds to being in the know. I think that's a foundational way of being transparent. You don't have all the answers; you need help as a leader too, which allows other people to be true to themselves even when communicating with a client.  [14:18] Why is taking care of people beyond work important to you as a CEO?  I'm a big proponent of leading with vulnerability and transparency. I want each of our foundational values to be weird. Weird in that we want people to show up as who they are. We do not want a work persona and an outwork person. We want them to come in with their point of view. But in terms of mental health, I think it's essential for leadership to show the importance of healthcare. Mental healthcare is as important as physical healthcare. We're at a time when we went through a pandemic. A lot is going on out there. I schedule my mental health and encourage my leaders to do the same. I have two slots weekly to take care of my mental health through meditation or therapy, which helps flex my emotional muscles.  [18:10] Have you seen the company grow since this was infused? It has created a more collaborative open environment with a feeling of togetherness. There is enough hardship in the world. There shouldn't be battles inside you. We hire professionals, but we fire them if we find out they are working against the company culture.  [20:30] What led to choosing values for your company?  There wasn't a sort of one key catalyst that I could point to. I just got to a point in my career where I know what I'm doing and asked myself if I'm genuinely fulfilled. I started figuring out through therapy what success means to me and how I can balance my personal and professional life. I did group therapy with nine people once a week. It's about learning how to deal with yourself and people's notions about you.  [26:40] What prompted you to write a book? The idea came from starting a business. I'm an avid reader who loves self-help and business books, and I didn't think there was a book out there that talked about how important creating your character is in being successful in the business world. So that's why the soulful persuasion was written. You are selling or persuading in any business, and you've got to do that to build any business. I talked about principles, playing the long game, being successful with character, and so on. For me, it is based on personality, and if you have a good feeling and follow some principles, I think you, too will have success, and that's what prompted me to write a book.  [43:28] How do blindspots show up, and how do you approach them? Blindspots come up at different points in our life but giving yourself space to reflect is not the first thing to do. Someone afraid of getting help could be avoiding difficult conversations. It could be pointing fingers at other people. I think giving yourself space to reflect is not number one. I think jotting down situations that you wish may be handled differently during or at the end of the day is good. You can examine those things and see how you reacted to certain things and situations. Embracing challenges is another one if you are avoiding hard conversations. If you're letting your ego into the way, try to move outside yourself and look at those challenges as growth opportunities. That is where growth comes from because we all have blind spots but learn to overcome them.  [46:09] What promise did God make to the world when he created you?  Treating everyone in the world as if we are all equal because we are all equal on this earth.  Key Quotes [43:18-43:25] If you feel helpless and that there is no one listening to you, this could be opening a blind spot of opening up to someone.   [44:40-44:42] Taking time for self-reflection will help uncover and overcome your blind spots.    How to connect with Jason Harris Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jason_harris/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jasonharriswinter LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jason-harris-29abb12