From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff & Jody Steurer

Avoidance is one of the most common reactions to emotional pain. It shows up as silence, staying busy, withdrawing, shutting down, or convincing yourself that “things will sort themselves out.” At first it feels protective. Over time, it becomes its own form of suffering and keeps couples stuck in the very patterns they’re trying to escape. In this episode, Geoff and Jody explore how avoidance operates in both partners after betrayal and how safely facing difficult truths creates genuine movement in the relationship. What We Cover: For the Betrayed Partner Why avoidance often becomes a survival response How overwhelm, exhaustion, and cultural pressure to “keep the peace” silence your real needs The difference between consciously pausing and unconsciously shutting down For the Recovering Partner How shame and fear fuel hiding, minimizing, and delaying accountability Why avoidance blocks repair and prolongs fear The honest question every recovering partner must answer For the Couple How both partners can slip into a shared pattern of avoidance Why comfort, silence, and homeostasis can feel safer than truth How one partner naming avoidance begins to shift the entire dynamic Remember...avoidance feels safe in the moment, but it interrupts healing. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

The holidays can stir up a full range of emotions, especially when you are carrying the weight of relational pain or the uncertainty of the healing process. In this episode, we step away from our usual structure and simply sit with you, offering a personal message of support for the weeks ahead. We talk about giving yourself permission to be where you are, without pressure to feel a certain way or perform a picture perfect holiday season. We explore the importance of honoring your yes and your no, creating space for relief, grief, joy, overwhelm, and everything in between. We also speak directly to those walking through separation, fresh discovery, or ongoing tension during a time that is supposed to feel warm and connected. Our hope is that this conversation feels like sitting at our kitchen table with us. You get to be honest about what you are holding this year, and you get to build the holiday you can manage, not the one you think you should create. You will hear us talk about:  Giving yourself permission to be exactly where you are this season Why pressure to be okay makes the holidays harder How to identify a strong yes and a strong no Ways couples can coordinate and protect their relational needs Support for those not spending the holidays in familiar or expected ways The unpredictability of grief and how naming emotions brings relief Allowing joy without guilt, even while doing deep work Why small moments of peace matter when you are carrying a lot Explore Courageous Together If you are looking for steadier footing through the holidays and beyond, our Courageous Together program can hold both of you through this process. It is a trauma informed roadmap designed to help couples understand where they are, where they are going, and how to work together while protecting the betrayed partner and supporting the recovering partner’s accountability. Inside the program you will find Weekly group circles for betrayed partners, recovering partners, and couples A full video course that walks you through every stage of healing Anonymous Q and A support with Geoff Tools, worksheets, and a guided path you can follow at your own pace A community that stays with you for as long as you need help   You can learn more and join us at https://www.courageoustogetherprogram.com/ 

After betrayal, even small mistakes can feel enormous. A forgotten detail, a defensive tone, or a moment of old behavior can land like a major setback. In this episode, Geoff and Jody talk about why these moments feel so threatening and what actually determines whether healing moves forward or shuts down. What We Cover: For the Betrayed Partner Why even small slips feel like confirmation nothing has changed How fear and past harm amplify the moment What she’s really looking for For the Recovering Partner What creates defensiveness or hiding Why the response matters more than the mistake The choice points that build or break trust For the Couple How repeated patterns shape safety What actually reveals more than behavior What real progress looks like in moments of rupture ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

One of the most common fears couples face after betrayal is the feeling of being out of sync. One partner seems to be moving faster. The other feels stuck or confused. One wants to talk. The other wants space. And both start wondering, Why aren’t we healing the same? What does this say about our relationship? In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody unpack why couples never heal at the same pace and why that’s not necessarily a sign of failure. It’s a sign that each person is doing different work with different starting points, needs, wounds, and responsibilities. In this episode, you’ll learn: For the Betrayed Partner Why you often feel “behind” early on, and why that feeling is actually a trauma response How being kept in the dark creates an enormous informational gap Why your slower pace is actually your body protecting you Living with integrity means you’re often ahead in emotional maturity and stability For the Recovering Partner Why the early “relief” of truth-telling can create the illusion of being further along How early recovery often becomes performative, focused on checklists and behaviors Why deeper work begins after the secrets end How shame, discomfort, and old coping patterns can pull you back into control or quick fixes For the Couple Why comparing timelines always leads to shame, pressure, or resentment How to stay connected even when your healing paces look completely different Why “doing your own work” creates more safety than trying to match each other’s progress What it really means to share a healing path without forcing your partner into your pace ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

We grow up believing that if someone truly loves us, they’ll just know what we need. That love will automatically teach them how to comfort, protect, and show up in the right ways. But when betrayal or disconnection happens, that belief gets tested—and often shattered. In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody talk about why love alone isn’t enough to heal after betrayal. They explore how this belief shows up differently for the betrayed partner, the recovering partner, and the couple as a whole—and what it really takes to rebuild connection when love is present, but understanding is missing. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why betrayed partners often equate missed needs with being unlovable How the belief “If you really loved me, you’d just know” traps both partners in pain Why recovering partners feel crushing pressure to get everything right The difference between love as a feeling and love as a daily practice How skill-building, vulnerability, and accountability transform love into safety ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

After betrayal, both partners are caught in a storm of overwhelming emotions and survival responses. The betrayed partner feels the instinct to pull away for safety. The recovering partner often feels paralyzed by shame and the fear of doing more damage. Both are protecting themselves—and both feel alone. In this episode, Geoff and Jody unpack why calming down together may feel impossible, but is actually key to long-term healing. They explore the natural push-pull dynamic created by betrayal trauma and offer a roadmap for how each partner can move toward stability, individually and together. In This Episode, You’ll Learn: For the Betrayed Partner: Why distance is a survival response and why still longing for connection doesn’t make you weak or “codependent.” For the Recovering Partner: How your presence is what creates safety, and why allowing your partner to move toward and away from you is one of the most powerful repair actions you can take. For the Couple: How to move out of a cycle of fear, shame, and reactivity and into a shared commitment to safety as the foundation of rebuilding trust. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

We often hear minimizing phrases like “It only happened once” or “Why make such a big deal out of it?” The intention may be to calm fears or move forward quickly—but instead, it often creates more confusion, pressure, and disconnection. In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody unpack why “just once” almost never feels small to either partner, and why minimizing actually blocks healing instead of speeding it up. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why “just once” lands as dismissal for the betrayed partner and activates the body’s threat response How minimizing traps the recovering partner in shame and prevents genuine repair The hidden pressure this phrase puts on the betrayed partner to get over it quickly and silence their own instincts The truth behind one-time breaches: even a single betrayal communicates capability, vulnerability, and risk How couples get stuck in collusion, both wanting to move on but feeling unsafe or unheard What healthy repair looks like instead: honest conversation, space to ask questions, and freedom to explore impact Key Takeaway Even if a behavior happened only once, its meaning is never small. One act communicates capacity, shifts safety, and opens the door to doubt. Real healing starts when both partners face the truth openly—not when they minimize it. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

Most people assume infidelity only matters when it becomes physical, but emotional infidelity can cut just as deep—and often deeper. When your partner gives emotional intimacy, attention, and affection to someone else, it leaves you questioning your place in the relationship and doubting your own instincts. In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody unpack why emotional infidelity is so damaging, why it’s often minimized, and what couples can do to protect their relationship from these subtle breaches of trust. They explore: Why betrayed partners often feel confused or pressured to minimize emotional cheating How “we’re just friends” becomes one of the most common forms of denial The danger of familiarity and unchecked closeness with someone outside the marriage Why protecting exclusivity in emotional connection matters as much as sexual fidelity How couples can set healthy boundaries that protect their emotional bond You’ll also hear Geoff and Jody share personal stories from their own marriage, illustrating how even innocent moments—like sharing music or interests too intimately with someone else—can cross emotional boundaries. This episode reframes emotional infidelity as a legitimate breach of trust that requires care, repair, and clarity. You’ll learn how to recognize red flags, have honest conversations about boundaries, and protect what’s sacred between you and your partner. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

We’ve all heard the phrase “honesty is the best policy.” But after betrayal, many couples find that simply telling the truth doesn’t always bring the healing they hoped for. In fact, sometimes the way truth is shared causes even more pain, confusion, and distance. In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody explore why truth on its own isn’t enough to rebuild trust—and how it must be paired with safety, accountability, and compassion to actually repair a relationship. You’ll hear: Why the way truth is shared can do more harm than good How betrayed partners experience “cold truth” that destabilizes rather than heals Why recovering partners often confuse telling their story with telling the truth How structure, timing, and accountability create safer truth-telling Why full healing requires equal ground, where both partners know the same truth Geoff and Jody unpack the tension between the betrayed partner’s right to know and the recovering partner’s responsibility to share honestly and safely. You’ll learn why disclosure must be structured—not controlled—and how thoughtful truth-telling becomes the foundation for rebuilding trust. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.

If you’re the betrayed partner, you know what it’s like to be hit with waves of emotion that feel impossible to control. One moment you’re holding it together, and the next you’re flooded with anger, grief, or fear. You may even wonder if you’re too much—or if you’re going crazy for reacting so strongly. And if you’re the recovering partner, you know how unsettling it is to face these storms. You want predictability, calm, and a path forward, but instead you feel powerless and defensive. Both of you are left asking: Why does this keep happening, and what are we supposed to do with it? In this episode of From Crisis to Connection, Geoff and Jody pull apart this cycle so you can finally understand what’s really happening underneath these reactions. They explore: Why betrayed partners’ strong emotions are survival responses, not “overreactions” How shame fuels defensiveness and blame for the recovering partner Why this dynamic often gets mislabeled as a “marriage problem” instead of a betrayal issue The different responsibilities of each partner in recovery—and why they’re not the same How couples can begin to work with these emotions instead of against them The key message: You’re not crazy—you’ve been through something crazy. These strong emotions are a normal, human response to relational trauma. And when both partners can understand and lean into this truth, healing and connection can begin. ______________________________ Download the Free Resource: You, Me, Us - A Way Forward After Betrayal When betrayal has shaken your relationship, it can feel impossible to know where to begin. This free 15-minute video and companion worksheet will help you steady yourself, support your partner, and begin caring for the relationship between you. Get your copy here. ______________________________ Join the Courageous Together™ Program Courageous Together™ isn’t just another course, it’s a trauma-informed roadmap that holds both of you in the healing process. If you’ve ever wondered “Where do we even start?” After betrayal, this program gives you the clarity and structure you need. It meets the betrayed partner’s need for safety while guiding the recovering partner toward real accountability, creating a path forward that neither of you has to figure out on your own. Healing from betrayal is overwhelming in isolation, which is why Courageous Together™ brings you expert guidance, practical tools, and a supportive community of couples walking the same road. Inside, you’ll find a step-by-step framework, live support opportunities, and the reassurance that you’re not alone as you rebuild safety, restore trust, and move toward genuine connection. You’ll have access to: A structured healing framework with step-by-step guidance Video lessons and worksheets to build safety, accountability, and connection The option to join live group circles and support calls with me A private, secure community of others walking the same path Learn more and join us inside Courageous Together: www.geoffsteurer.com/courageous-together ______________________________ Stay Connected Website YouTube Instagram Facebook If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review! We’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey. ______________________________ Watch on YouTube Prefer video? You can watch full episodes of From Crisis to Connection on our YouTube channel: youtube.com/@FromCrisistoConnectionPocast. ______________________________About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist (CCPS) with 25+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal from the devastation of sexual betrayal and broken trust. I am the founder of the Courageous Together program, co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, and co-author of Love You, Hate the Porn. My work integrates trauma-informed care, attachment theory, and practical tools for creating lasting safety and connection. I’ve been married to my wife, Jody, since 1996 and we are the parents of four children. About Jody SteurerJody is the co-host of the From Crisis to Connection podcast, where she brings her thoughtful, common-sense perspective to conversations about healing, trust, and connection. She earned her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA-certified coach. Jody has years of experience in corporate training, small business leadership, and family life, and raising four children (two of them neurodivergent). She loves watercolor painting, landscape design, spending time outdoors, and snow skiing.