How to Heal Body Image After Betrayal

After betrayal, it’s common for women to turn inward, blaming their bodies and questioning their worth. In this important conversation, we talk with Dr. Lauren Barnes, therapist, researcher, and director of clinical training at BYU’s Marriage and Family Therapy program.

Dr. Barnes shares how her clinical and personal experiences led her to work with women struggling with body image and eating disorders. Together, we explore the connection between faith, culture, self-worth, and body image—especially in the aftermath of sexual betrayal.

If you’ve ever felt the impact of betrayal show up in your relationship with your body, this episode will help you understand why it happens, how cultural and religious messages shape that experience, and what you can do to reclaim your body as a source of power, connection, and joy.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode (with Timestamps):
⏳ [04:30] – Why Dr. Barnes shifted from betrayal trauma to body image work
⏳ [07:00] – How eating disorders and body image issues are often about control and connection
⏳ [10:30] – Key findings from Dr. Barnes’ study on LDS women, faith, and body image
⏳ [16:00] – How doctrine (like belief in divine nature or the Word of Wisdom) influences body image
⏳ [17:50] – Surprising findings about cosmetic surgery and “costly grace” beliefs
⏳ [30:00] – Why open conversations, community, and connection improve body image
⏳ [32:30] – Practical ways to build a healthier relationship with your body after betrayal

If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it. And don’t forget to leave a review—we’d love to hear how this podcast is supporting your healing journey!

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About Geoff Steurer:
I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.

About Jody Steurer:
Jody has been a strong voice supporting women as co-host of the podcast “Speak Up Sister”. She completed a bachelor's degree in psychology from Brigham Young University and is an ACA certified coach. She runs a small business and has years of experience in corporate training and organization. Jody’s most challenging work has been raising her four children (two of which are on the autism spectrum). She loves to do landscape design, paint in watercolor, spend time outdoors, and snow ski.

About Lauren Barnes:
Dr. Lauren A. Barnes grew up in the Pacific Northwest. During her graduate programs in Marriage & Family Therapy, she became particularly interested in working with individuals struggling with body image, eating disorders, and postpartum depression. During and after her PhD program, she worked as a therapist at Center for Change, a residential treatment center in Utah for women and girls struggling with eating disorders.

Dr. Barnes is currently a Clinical Professor and the Director of Clinical Training for BYU’s Marriage & Family Therapy graduate programs. She also maintains a small private practice. She has researched and presented on family implicit rules in eating disordered and non-eating disordered families.

One of her current passions is speaking at women's retreats where women gather and engage in various adventures from river rafting to canyoneering to hiking and stargazing while having conversations and classes about body image and intuitive eating.
https://www.instagram.com/drlaurenabarneslmft/
https://www.facebook.com/drlaurenbarnes/

The advice offered through Geoff Steurer's podcasts is educational and informational in nature and is provided only as general information. It is not meant to establish a therapist-patient relationship or offer therapeutic advice, opinion, diagnosis treatment or to establish a standard of care. Although Geoff Steurer is a trained psychotherapist, he is not functioning in the role of a licensed therapist during these podcasts, but rather using his training to inform the content. Thus, the content is not intended to replace independent professional judgment. The content is not intended to solicit clients or patients, and should not be relied upon as medical or psychological advice of any kind or nature whatsoever. The information provided through the Content should not be used for diagnosing or treating a mental health problem or disease. The information contained in these communications is not comprehensive and does not include all the potential information regarding the subject matter, but is merely intended to serve as one resource for general and educational purposes.

Episode 292