

Do You F*cking Mind?
Alexis Fernandez-Preiksa
Mindset hacks for a badass life, hosted by cognitive neuroscientist Alexis Fernandez. On Mondays my episodes are a combo of neuroscience and psychology. I deep dive into everything from habit formation and how to live a carefree life, to friendships and heartbreak. And on Fridays we've got Head Noise - where I answer your questions! Email info@dyfmpod.com to submit your questions. Order your copy of my latest book How to Chase Change at https://bit.ly/44xwszR .
Episodes
Mentioned books

Feb 1, 2026 • 53min
470. How to End Comparison and Competition for Good - Psychology tools that work
Why do you keep comparing yourself to everyone else, even people you love?
Why does competition creep into friendships, relationships, work, and social media… even when you know it’s making you feel worse?
In this episode, I break down the psychology of comparison and competition. Why your brain gets stuck in it, why some situations trigger you more than others, and how to end the comparison cycle permanently, not just “manage” it.
We talk about:
Why comparison isn’t the problem, loss of self-trust is
How triggers reveal where you’ve outsourced your worth
The difference between healthy ambition and toxic competition
Why comparing yourself to friends and siblings hurts the most
How social media intensifies insecurity without you realising
The psychology behind competing for validation, attention, and approval
How to stop competing in friendships, dating, and everyday life
The mindset shift that makes comparison lose its power for good
This episode is for anyone who feels behind, constantly measures themselves against others, or is exhausted by the quiet mental competition they can’t seem to turn off.
If comparison is draining your confidence, affecting your relationships, or keeping you stuck, this episode will help you understand why it happens and exactly how to step out of it for good. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 29, 2026 • 31min
469. Silent treatment trauma, identity crisis from stepping back and please break my dating curse! Head Noise
BONJOUR! Head Noise today!
So many questions coming through so we are ramping up these Head Noise episodes.
Today we cover dating curses and how to break out of them, issues with friends who have given you the silent treatment, how to advance at work and stop being a soggy lemon and what to do when you take a step back for the sake of your mental health but it causes your mental health to continue to suffer because of the dreaded identity crisis.
Lets get into it!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 28, 2026 • 42min
468. I suck at choosing the right partner, my mum is a negative drain and I’ve cut my friend out and do not miss her. (Headnoise)
On this HN episode, I get to answer your questions and they are GOOD. We get to the bottom of:
Why you may be so bad at picking the right partner, how to change something within you to make better choices moving forward.
Why you do not have to feel guilty for cutting a friend off even if they have zero friends (ahem, accountability)
How to deal with a painfully negative mother (whom you adore and do not want to cut out)
And what to do if you are at the 7 year mark, unsure if you should stay or leave when there is a house and 2 dogs involved.
Don’t forget to send through YOUR Head Noise questions to info@dyfmpod.com
Sydney Live Show February 4th, tickets are on sale here.
Join the DYFM Facebook Group
Follow @doyoufkingmind on IG
Follow @dyfmpodcast on TT
Follow @alexisfernandezpreiksa on IG
Follow @alexispredez on TT
Follow @mindsetrecreationclub on IG
Follow @mindsetrecreationclub on TT
Order your Brain Journal here: www.mindsetrecreationclub.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 26, 2026 • 44min
467. Why Rejection Feels So Painful (Psychology of Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria)
If rejection (or even perceived rejection) feels physically painful, overwhelming, or impossible to shake, this episode is for you.
In this episode, we explore the psychology behind Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) a widely recognized experience (though not a formal diagnosis) that’s especially common in people with ADHD, and anyone who struggles with intense emotional reactions to rejection, criticism, or disapproval.
This episode covers:
What RSD actually feels like and why it can feel physically painful
The difference between real rejection and perceived rejection
Common triggers (and why perception matters more than reality)
What’s happening in the brain during an RSD spiral
Signs you may be experiencing RSD
Why people-pleasing, avoidance, overachievement, and rumination don’t actually help
How RSD differs from “normal” emotional sensitivity
The link between RSD, ADHD, and emotional dysregulation
This episode isn’t about “toughening up” or stopping emotions from happening.
It’s about learning how to move through rejection without losing yourself to it and rebuilding a sense of control, safety, and self-trust.
If you’ve ever thought, “I know this is irrational, but it feels unbearable,” this conversation will help you understand why and what to do next.
Sydney Live Show February 4th, tickets are on sale here.
Join the DYFM Facebook Group
Follow @doyoufkingmind on IG
Follow @dyfmpodcast on TT
Follow @alexisfernandezpreiksa on IG
Follow @alexispredez on TT
Follow @mindsetrecreationclub on IG
Follow @mindsetrecreationclub on TT
Order your Brain Journal here: www.mindsetrecreationclub.com
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 22, 2026 • 26min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 10. Choosing Peace is the Power Move
Episode 10 – Choosing Peace Is the Power Move
(How Stability, Clarity, and Balance Actually Give You Everything You Want)The Reset You Actually Need
For a long time, hustle culture convinced us that being busy meant we were getting somewhere.
In Episode 10 — the final episode of The Reset You Actually Need , we explore why choosing peace isn’t giving up on ambition, but refining it into something sustainable, intelligent, and far more effective.
This episode breaks down:
Why hustle culture confuses motion with real progress
How constant urgency fragments attention and fuels anxiety
Why peace of mind increases performance rather than complacency
How balance isn’t a compromise it’s an optimisation strategy
Why inconsistency creates anxiety and the illusion of “falling behind”
How overstimulation kills clarity, creativity, and fulfilment
Why slower, long-form thinking leads to better decisions and deeper satisfaction
We talk about the gap between where you are and where you think you should be and how that gap is often the source of chronic anxiety. Not because you’re failing, but because you’re trying to sprint instead of stabilise.
Choosing peace doesn’t mean doing less.
It means doing the right things, consistently, without burning yourself out.
This episode is about redefining success so you don’t have to escape your own life to survive it.
This episode concludes a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, rebuild self-trust, and step into the year calm, clear, and self-led.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 21, 2026 • 24min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 9. Less proving, More Choosing
Day 9. Less Proving, More Choosing
The Reset You Actually Need
So much exhaustion comes from trying to prove your worth.
In Day 9 of The Reset You Actually Need, we explore what happens when you stop performing for validation and start making decisions from clarity, self-trust, and alignment instead.
This episode breaks down:
The difference between proving and choosing and why it matters
Why proving is reactive, while choosing is grounded and powerful
How the need to prove often comes from unresolved self-doubt
Why proving keeps you busy, but choosing actually moves you forward
How choosing makes boundaries feel simpler and more natural
The discomfort that comes with choosing and why it’s necessary
This episode isn’t about becoming cold, dismissive, or disconnected.
When you stop trying to convince people of your value, your decisions get quieter, clearer, and far more effective.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, rebuild self-trust, and move through the year with calm authority and direction. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 20, 2026 • 27min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 8. Until you learn to rest, you will not get ahead
Day 8 – Until You Learn to Rest, You Will Not Get Ahead
The Reset You Actually Need
So many people think they’re resting but they’re actually avoiding.
In Day 8 of The Reset You Actually Need, we explore why confusing rest with avoidance keeps you feeling overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and stuck in the same place, even when you’re “taking breaks.”
This episode covers:
The difference between real rest and avoidance behaviours
Why your mood and energy don’t change when rest isn’t restorative
The kinds of tasks people avoid and why
How to tell if you truly rested or just numbed out
Why sleep alone doesn’t fix exhaustion
Forms of rest that actually restore energy and calm the nervous system
Why some activities are more restful than bed rotting
How to wind down on your own without avoidance
If you feel like you’re constantly tired, overwhelmed, or needing more time off — this episode will help you understand what kind of rest you actually need, and how to get it without sabotaging your momentum.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, rebuild self-trust, and move through the year with clarity and calm self-leadership. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 19, 2026 • 23min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 7. More self trust - stop negotiating with your own excuses
Self-trust doesn’t disappear because you fail.
It erodes because you keep negotiating with yourself and breaking the deal.
In Day 7 of The Reset You Actually Need, we talk about why so many people struggle to trust themselves, even when they’re capable, intelligent, and motivated, and how constant internal negotiation quietly destroys confidence.
This mini episode explores:
Why every excuse sounds reasonable in your own voice
The difference between a valid reason and a repeated pattern
How negotiating with yourself teaches your brain that your word is flexible
Why discipline isn’t harsh, it’s relieving and freeing
The balance between self-compassion and accountability
Why small promises matter more than big goals
Self-trust isn’t built through motivation, grit, or hype.
It’s built through follow-through.
When you stop arguing with yourself, life gets simpler.
Decisions feel lighter.
Confidence starts to return naturally.
This episode is about becoming someone who does what they say, without punishment, drama, or burnout.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, rebuild self-trust, and move through the year with clarity and calm self-leadership. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 18, 2026 • 24min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 6. How to stop feeling disappointed and regain control over your life
The Reset You Actually Need
Feeling constantly disappointed in people, in situations, or in yourself is exhausting.
In this episode of The Reset You Actually Need, we unpack why disappointment is rarely about bad luck, and more often about repeating the same patterns, ignoring behaviour, and abandoning your own boundaries often without realising it.
This episode explores:
Why disappointment is often self-created (and how to stop doing that)
How repeating the same goals or relationships erodes self-trust
Why listening to words instead of behaviour keeps you stuck
The psychology of repeated rejection and loss of control
How taking responsibility restores agency (without self-blame)
Why self-respect is the fastest way back to emotional stability
This isn’t about becoming cynical or emotionally closed off.
It’s about regaining control by changing what you tolerate, repeat, and negotiate with.
If you’re tired of feeling let down, drained, or stuck in cycles that keep hurting you, this episode will help you reset your expectations, rebuild self-trust, and move forward with clarity.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, raise your standards, and step into the year with calm self-leadership.
Episode 217 - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5sXGur29se1TajjfWjMiNB Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 15, 2026 • 23min
The Reset You Actually Need - Day 5. Stop waiting to feel ready: Why action changes identity
Episode 5 – Stop Waiting to Feel Ready: Why Action Changes Identity
The Reset You Actually Need – Day 5
So many people believe confidence, clarity, or motivation comes before they act.
In Day 5 of The Reset You Actually Need, we unpack why waiting to feel ready is one of the most common (and invisible) ways people stay stuck, and how identity is shaped by action, not intention.
This episode explores:
Why the brain doesn’t reward planning, it rewards movement
How repeated action updates self-concept and confidence
The psychology behind hesitation and “I’ll start when…” thinking
Why readiness is a byproduct, not a prerequisite
How to begin changing your identity through behaviour, not self-talk
If you’ve been waiting for motivation, certainty, or the perfect moment before making a change, this episode will help you understand why that moment rarely arrives , and what actually creates momentum instead.
This isn’t about forcing yourself or pushing harder.
It’s about letting action do the psychological work for you.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to help you reset your mindset, rebuild self-trust, and move through the year with calm direction. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices


