Beautifully Complex

Some of the most meaningful shifts in parenting don’t arrive with fireworks or finish lines. They arrive quietly, in the moments we almost miss. I’ve been noticing how much growth hides beneath the surface, both in our kids and in ourselves. And honestly, most of it looks nothing like the traditional markers of success we’re conditioned to watch for.Our neurodivergent kids build skills slowly, internally, and often invisibly. Their progress lives in nervous system shifts, not milestones. It’s in the way they repair a little faster after a rupture. It’s in the moment they come back to the table after taking a breather instead of refusing altogether. It’s in how we pause before reacting, catch our breath, and choose connection over correction. Those small things are not small at all. They’re the roots of emotional intelligence, resilience, and long-term regulation. And roots take time.This episode is an invitation to see the tiny glimmers you’ve overlooked this past year, because you have moved forward, even if it didn’t look dramatic from the outside. You’ll hear why the nervous system learns through repetition, not grand gestures; how micro-wins compound like a snowball; and how the tiniest cues of safety create a very real pathway toward thriving.I’m also sharing a short year-end reflection practice to help you notice the moments that mattered, soften self-doubt, and step into 2026 with intention, compassion, and doable hope.You are not alone. And you’ve done more than you think.Press play to hear the full conversation.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/338Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

There’s a moment so many of us experience standing in the kitchen, staring at the backpack explosion on the floor, the socks in the hallway, the half-finished bowl of cereal on the table and wondering why our kids can’t seem to follow through. It’s not laziness. It’s not defiance. It’s executive function. And for our neurodivergent kids, especially those with ADHD, those invisible skills we rely on to get through the day can feel like climbing a mountain without a map.In this episode, I’m joined by two members of The Childhood Collective, Mallory Yee and Katie Severson — clinicians, moms, and deeply empathetic guides who truly “live it.” Together, we break down what executive functioning actually is (spoiler: it’s your brain’s internal GPS), why so many of our kids struggle with tasks that seem “easy,” and how we can shift from doing everything for our kids to doing things with them in realistic, sustainable ways.We talk about everyday EF supports like creating “homes” for items, teaching kids to close their own loops, using declarative language, and narrating our internal problem-solving so they learn to build theirs. Katie and Mallory share generously from both their clinical lens and their lived experience, reminding us that nothing is wrong with our kids… their brains just need time, scaffolding, and connection.This conversation is hopeful, practical, and validating, especially if you’ve ever wondered why your child can’t “just get ready” or why every day feels like a string of side quests.Tune in for simple strategies, compassionate reframes, and support that meets you right where you are.Press play and let’s walk this path together.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/337Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Every once in a while, a conversation lands in your heart in a way that stays. This encore episode is one of those for me. Luke was around twenty when we recorded it, and listening back now, I’m struck all over again by the grounded clarity he had about his neurodivergence, even in the places where life still felt messy or confusing. He spoke with such quiet certainty about seeing his differences as differences, not deficits. That mindset didn’t come from easy experiences. It came from years of feeling misunderstood, moments of being boxed in by systems not designed for him, and the slow, steady process of learning himself from the inside out.What I love about this conversation is how real it is. There’s no glossy “we figured it out” narrative here. Instead, Luke talks through the way school felt, the times he believed he was stuck, the pressure that shut him down, and the deep importance of finding people who truly see you. And I share what I learned right alongside him: how often I co-escalated without meaning to, how long it took to realize there was nothing to fix, and how essential it is to protect the relationship above everything else.If you’ve ever wondered what your neurodivergent child might say about their experience once they have more language for it, this episode is a gift. Luke’s perspective is honest, hopeful, and full of the kind of wisdom you only gain by living it.Settle in for this special encore and listen through two lenses — your parent heart and your human heart.Press play and join us for this tender, funny, deeply insightful conversation.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/336Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Some of the hardest questions our teens wrestle with don’t have answers. Why am I here? What’s the point? Who am I becoming? When your neurodivergent tween or teen starts circling those big, existential questions, it can feel unsettling and even a little frightening. But what if this discomfort isn’t a crisis to fix—what if it’s an opening for connection?In this conversation, I talk with therapist and fellow neurodivergent parent Matthew Fishleder about helping teens navigate the messy, meaning-making side of adolescence. We explore how “not knowing” is part of growth, how regulation and connection support that process, and why your calm presence matters more than your wisdom or answers.Matthew shares powerful ways to shift from fixing to accompanying—to sit beside your teen in uncertainty instead of trying to solve it. Together we unpack how nervous system regulation, shared curiosity, and honest “I don’t knows” can turn existential anxiety into deeper trust and emotional safety.If your teen is questioning everything—and you’re not sure what to say—this one’s for you.Listen now and learn how to not know together.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/335Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Launching a neurodivergent young adult rarely looks like what we imagined. It’s not a straight line toward independence but rather a winding journey filled with scaffolding, support, and deep personal growth for both parent and child. In this heartfelt conversation with my friend Debbie Reber of Full Tilt Parenting, we get real about what it means to companion our kids into adulthood, not push them off a cliff toward “independence.”We talk about the delicate dance of helping without overstepping, the invisible scaffolding we still build behind the scenes, and how to honor their timeline while protecting our own nervous systems. We also unpack what it feels like when society tells us we’re doing “too much,” and how to trust the long game of growth, connection, and mutual respect.If you’ve ever wondered where to draw the line between support and enabling — or how to be ok yourself while your young adult finds their footing — this conversation will bring relief, validation, and renewed hope.Take a deep breath, pour your coffee, and listen in for part two of this beautifully real dialogue on parenting through the young adult years. Part 1 is on Full Tilt Parenting at https://tiltparenting.com/session474.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at https://parentingadhdandautism.com/334Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

When writing becomes a daily battle, it’s not about laziness or lack of effort. It’s about overwhelm. Writing is one of the most complex tasks our brains can do. For kids with dysgraphia or other writing challenges, that cognitive load can feel crushing. In this episode, I talk with occupational therapist and handwriting expert Kelli Fetter about how to spot writing struggles early, what dysgraphia really looks like, and how you can support your child in simple, practical ways right now.Kelli shares her own journey — from an OT who hadn’t even heard of dysgraphia to a mom on a mission to help her daughter — and the powerful lessons she learned along the way. Together, we unpack five key strategies for helping kids build the foundations of writing without frustration or shame, from multisensory learning to quality practice and collaborative school partnerships.If your child avoids writing, melts down over assignments, or feels “stuck,” this conversation will bring both clarity and relief. It’s never too late to help your child feel capable and confident in expressing their ideas.Tune in to learn practical tools, empowering mindset shifts, and how to build success one letter at a time.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/333Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

The first few weeks of a new school year can feel like a fresh start — hopeful, organized, maybe even easy. And then, just as the weather begins to cool, everything begins to unravel. Mornings turn chaotic again. Homework becomes a battle. The spark in your child’s eyes starts to fade. That October crash isn’t a failure, it’s actually biology.In this episode, I unpack why so many neurodivergent kids hit a wall a few weeks into the school year. The novelty that once lit up their brains fades, expectations rise, and their nervous systems grow tired from holding it all together. What looks like defiance or laziness is often a body saying, “I can’t keep doing it this way.” We’ll explore how to respond when school starts to feel like too much, without slipping into control or consequences. You’ll learn how to shift from asking “How do I make them do it?” to “What’s getting in the way?” and how safety, not structure, helps kids rebuild their capacity to cope.If your child’s school year feels like it’s coming undone, this conversation will help you reframe what’s happening and find your footing again. You’ll walk away with practical tools and a gentler mindset to navigate this season with compassion, connection, and calm. Listen now to learn how to meet your child where they are and bring hope back into the school year. You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/332Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

What if the most powerful shift isn’t a new strategy, but a new story about you and your child? In this heart-forward episode, I offer five truths every parent of a neurodivergent child needs to hear — reminders that land like a soft place to rest: you’re not failing; your child isn’t broken; you don’t have to do this alone; you matter too; and healing takes time. These truths aren’t platitudes. They’re anchors for those messy, brave moments when the plan falls apart, the behavior feels bigger than your tools, and the timeline stretches longer than you hoped.I’m gently reframing behavior as a signal, not a character flaw. I name the weight of comparison and judgment — and then lift it off your shoulders with language that centers nervous system safety, connection, and tiny steps forward. You’ll hear practical reassurance about regulation (yours and your child’s), why your presence matters more than perfection, and how community changes everything. If you’ve been clenching your jaw or holding your breath, this is your permission to exhale.Come for the validation; leave with a steadier nervous system and a quieter inner critic. You’ll walk away believing that one small compassionate choice today truly counts, and that both you and your child are worthy, exactly as you are. Press play and feel seen. Then share this with another parent who needs a hand to hold. Listen now.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/331Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

What if instead of asking, “Why is my child being so difficult?” you asked yourself, “What is my child’s nervous system trying to tell me?” That small shift changes everything.As parents of neurodivergent kids, we’ve all had those moments when our child’s behavior pushes every button we have. The yelling, the defiance, the meltdowns! It’s easy to feel disrespected, rejected, or even attacked. And when that storm hits, our own nervous system often gets swept up, too.In this episode, I share a different path forward. You’ll learn how to pause and anchor yourself in the heat of the moment, how to reframe behavior as a signal instead of a problem, and why repair matters more than perfection. These simple but powerful shifts bring steadiness for you and safety for your child.This isn’t about controlling your child. It’s about grounding yourself so you can show up with the calm presence your child needs. Because when you feel steady, your child feels safer, and that’s where connection, growth, and resilience take root.👉 Tune in now to discover how to handle those button-pushing moments with more calm, compassion, and clarity.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/330Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

What if the “problem behavior” isn’t the problem at all, but a signal? This week, we flip the script on rewards and punishments and lean into tools that actually help neurodivergent kids (and their parents) feel safer, calmer, and more connected. When a child’s nervous system is in fight/flight/freeze, the “thinking brain” goes dim. That’s why lectures, sticker charts, and lost-screen-time threats fall flat. They assume choice and control that a dysregulated brain just doesn’t have.In this episode, I unpack three simple, connection-first strategies you can try today: co-regulation before correction, offering bounded choices to restore a sense of control, and smoothing transitions so the brain has time to shift gears. You’ll hear quick snapshots: homework battles that soften with scaffolding, morning routines that move with choice, and playground goodbyes eased by gentle time warnings. These aren’t magic fixes; they’re nervous-system aware supports that lower threat, build trust, and grow real-life skills like flexibility and problem-solving.We also talk about why this approach is teaching responsibility, without fear. Consistency, safety, and autonomy wire the brain for emotional intelligence, which is what carries our kids into teens and adulthood with the capacity to regulate, adapt, and take ownership. Start tiny, celebrate small wins, and watch the ripple.Ready to feel less like a referee and more like an anchor? Listen now and try one small shift this week. Then tell me how it went. I’m cheering you on.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/329Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.