No More Desire ™ Porn Addiction Recovery

FREE LESSON: Write Your Walk Through Fire StatementWhen I was addicted to porn, I often struggled to know how to respond to a relapse. The amount of shame, fear, and anger I felt when I slipped was overwhelming. I thought that if I relapsed on porn, it meant all of my progress was now down the toilet. I thought, “What reason do I have to stop watching porn now? Afterall, my time clean is zero. So, why not just give in for a while?” Working with other addicts I sponsor and coach has shown me that I was not the only one who felt this way after I relapsed. People often tell me after a slip that they feel like giving up. After a full year of sobriety, one addict recently told me after he relapsed, “I’m just having trouble finding my meaning again. I don’t know why I should stay sober. I know I want to, but I just don’t feel the drive to stay clean like I did before.” I could not tell him how much I understood those feelings. I had been there many times after relapses. The will to go on wanes, as the momentum you previously experienced dies down. Getting it going again is painful. But it can be done. When you relapse on porn, it is easy to feel like giving up and giving in. I understand that feeling, as it happened to me so many times as an addict. One of the things I came to find out after years of sobriety is that this mentality of giving up was not exclusive to my porn recovery alone. I practiced this type of hopeless thinking in multiple areas of my life. It was not until I began changing my mindset - from an addiction mindset to a recovery mindset - that I started to experience more success staying clean. We’ll address these points in this episode. If you’ve relapsed on porn, my prayer is that these teachings will help get you back on track. BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

If you struggle with porn addiction, ever wonder where your cravings come from? Addiction cravings are not simply due to “manly urges” or a genetic predisposition. They are a result of our mental state.Having a recovery mindset is all about leaning into discomfort. It’s also about changing your focus. In this episode, I share one of the greatest tips to overcome porn addiction that I know of. It’s not a magic pill, but it certainly does make a difference. I remember how hard it was for me to quit porn. I tried so many different things to stop - filters, willpower, not thinking about it, accountability buddies. Some of it helped, but nothing taught me how to get rid of porn addiction completely. Today, I talk about how to undo stress, improve mental health, and overcome a specific habit that is driving you to your addiction.For more porn addiction help, be sure to like, follow, and rate this podcast! BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

Have you ever wondered if what you eat affects your addiction cravings? In today’s episode, I’ll tell you how what you eat impacts addiction - more specifically porn addiction and your ability to quit porn. In western biology and psychology, we often overlook the importance of nutritions effects on mental health. More and more, we are coming to understand the connection between digestion and gut health and the health of our brain. In this episode, I explain why this is - including information on the gut microbiome, micronutrients, and certain plants that can help with mental health and porn addiction recovery.  BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

What if I told you to stop resisting your pornography addiction? What if I told you that sobriety didn’t require you to restrain yourself? In today’s episode, I talk about how to break free of porn addiction without resisting cravings.The mistake I’ve watched so many of us make, and that I made for over a decade (still do sometimes), is thinking that the answer to quit porn is to resist urges. When cravings come, we get in the habit of fighting, distracting, forcing ourselves not to think about it…None of these are the answer. There is a better way that involves far less stress. I’ll tell you how to stop watching porn in a way that doesn’t require willpower.BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

If we want to break free from porn addiction, we have to learn how to still the mind. We go to porn as a way to escape our problems. The same is true for all addicts. One of the main reasons we do this is because our minds are so noisy and chaotic, and it seems that intensely pleasurable outlets are the only things that will dampen the constant mental thrumming that pushes us to addiction. Throughout the years that I was addicted to porn, my mind was such a loud and stressed place. I felt like I could rarely get a break from my worries. My emotions were volatile, negative thinking was constantly in my face, and anxiety and depression were always just around the corner.As porn addicts, we use constant distraction as a way to elevate our mood. We attempt to drown out the stress and negative emotions through TV, movies, video games, junk food, loud music, social media scrolling… you name it, we use it. We do this to cope with stress; to soften the mental thrumming that wills us to give in to our destructive behavior. But we fail to realize that constant distraction only increases the frequency and intensity of the beat. If we want to stop watching porn, we need to change our strategy.One of the things I didn’t understand as an addict (and truth be told I’m still learning it), is that constant distractions and stimulation were exactly the opposite of what I needed. I thought that things like TV, food, entertainment, and video games would satiate my need for pleasure. I thought if only I could experience enough fun and enjoyment, my desire for porn would decrease. How wrong I was. This did not and never would help me overcome pornography addiction. BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

Sometimes we as addicts have troubles looking outside of ourselves. We may experience difficulty listening to others' troubles and being present for their physical or emotional needs. This is not because we are inherently selfish, but because our past trauma and shame habits can make it hard for us to connect with others and look outside of ourselves, thus leading to unfortunately selfish acts, such as porn addiction. Empathy and addiction do not coexist very well. This can be a hard truth for many of us addicts to face, but until we do we cannot change. We hold a lot of fear and shame inside, in other words we are afraid that the bad things that happened in the past - neglect, betrayal, failure -  will happen again, and we question our worthiness of love.We get stuck in an endless cycle of detachment and anger, rather than facing the underlying feelings of insecurity and unworthiness (shame habits) that follow us around everywhere we go. We addicts desperately want those around us to feel loved and cared for. We want to be good and do good. It’s just that our own insecurities get in the way, and we don’t know how to overcome them; to get out of the cycle of fear, shame, and addiction that leads to selfish acts. It’s not that we’re selfish, just temporarily damned in our progression, much as scripture states sinners are “damned to hell” - trapped in a cycle of suffering until we experience a fundamental change of heart through voluntary humility and God’s grace. To feel true empathy, we addicts must find a new way of thinking and acting. Our own selfishness will continue to bar us from meaningful relationships until we can humble ourselves enough and be self-compassionate enough to put down our “shame-shield” that blocks us from love, and realize that we and those around us are all worthy of love in God’s eyes.BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To BreaSupport the showNo More Desire

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to addiction and perfectionism lately. About how alike these two mental illnesses are. I’m going to tell you how perfectionism and porn addiction feed off of each other, and how all addictions, to an extent, find their origin in guilt and shame addiction - something you may have never heard of. Both porn addiction and perfectionism have something in common, and that’s that they both originate in guilt and shame. This guilt and shame can become alluring to “the natural man” (the pleasure-centered brain). It can come to crave it over time. Feeling shameful or guilty about a bad behavior is not what motivates an addict to stop. In truth, it is the shame and guilt that drive us addicts to engage in our addiction in the first place. (Don’t try to make sense of our addict brains - God knows we certainly can’t!). Perfectionism feeds off of this guilt and shame, just as pornography addiction does. And because perfectionism increases stress, it can cause us to feel a need to cope in unhealthy ways. In this episode, you'll learn how Porn Addiction and Perfectionism are deeply intertwined.BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

Today I want to talk about how to let go of shame and porn addiction and how living with more simplicity and presence can help us recover. Something I’ve witnessed in myself and others I’ve talked to is that those of us who get worked up over the details or are really hard on ourselves often struggle with pornography addiction. I often see perfectionism and addiction go hand-in-hand - in other words a propensity to expect too much of ourselves and to feel very worried about mistakes - I know I’m that way and it drove much of the addiction in my life - maybe you can relate. So, I want to talk more about how this works - why we get so worked up over little things and how this leads to addiction. And then to talk about how we can stop doing this so we can start working out of addiction. Because addiction, at the end of the day, is not about stopping the behavior - it is about changing your mental state by working through emotional obstacles, feeling more peace, and becoming closer to God and those around us.BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

If you want to learn how to stop watching porn, you need to understand the addiction and recovery trinities. Porn addiction has several causes that play off of each other. They are physical, mental, spiritual, and relational. If you want to quit porn, you need to know what each of these are, how they work, and why it is so hard to break free of porn addiction. I learned how to stop watching porn 8 years ago. It doesn't mean that I never have challenging thoughts or that I don't still deal with cravings from time to time. The difference now is that I understand addiction, and I have the tools I need to work through mental illness and other difficult experiences. In this video, I will teach you how to do this too. BUILD THE NO MORE PORN LIFESTYLEFREE WORKSHOP: The 8 Keys to Lose Your Desire for PornFREE EBOOK: The 10 Tools to Conquer Porn CravingsJoin My Email NewsletterIntensive Porn Addiction Recovery ProgramSchedule a Free ConsultationMORE ARTICLESHow to Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Relapse (Without a Fight) Using The 4-Pronged Ownership ApproachThe 4 Root Causes of Porn AddictionHow to Help Someone with a Porn Addiction in 3 Steps8 Rules to Get You 3 Months Sober from PornStop Porn Cravings | 7 Tools to Overcome Fantasizing & Lust HabitsTrauma, Attachment, Shame & Porn AddictionThe Porn Addiction Funnel: How To Break Porn AddictionSupport the showNo More Desire

Explore the hidden roots of porn addiction, focusing on the core emotions of fear and shame that drive cravings. Discover the pressure-gauge analogy, illustrating how mental states can trigger or alleviate urges for porn. Learn about three fundamental elements essential for long-term recovery: faith, worth, and love. Understand the distinction between self-worth and self-esteem, and how embracing imperfection can foster lasting change. The insights shared offer not just awareness but practical solutions for breaking free from addiction.