Hey White Women

The conversation explores the significance of hair in relation to coercive control, dehumanization, and racism. The hosts discuss the experience of having their hair touched without consent and the emotional journey of embracing natural hair. They highlight the lack of consent and respect in interactions between white women and black women regarding hair. The conversation also touches on the impact of compliments and the importance of language when discussing these issues. Overall, the conversation sheds light on the deep-rooted biases and discrimination surrounding hair and the need for awareness and understanding. The conversation explores the impact of appearance control and surveillance on individuals, particularly focusing on hair and body size. It highlights how these standards are influenced by white supremacy and how they contribute to the dehumanization and objectification of marginalized groups. The discussion also touches on the intersectionality of appearance standards in different contexts, such as the military and corporate America. The hosts emphasize the importance of reclaiming personal style and rejecting societal expectations to truly know oneself. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website:  https://www.whitewomanwhisperer.com Patreon:  https://www.patreon.com/whitewomanwhisperer TikTok: @white_woman_whisperer https://www.tiktok.com/@white_woman_whisperer?_t=8nslhOSSy8g&_r=1     Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/GroupBehaviorGal TikTok: @daniellamestyanekyoung Instagram: @_daniellamyoung https://www.uncultureyourself.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuFRBZ2w3QsYs7Km69keHsg UnAMERICAN Videobook   Get the book: UNCULTURED: A Memoir     "A propulsive memoir delivered in the honest tones of a woman who didn't always think she'd live to tell her story." --NYT     See a Sample Chapter in Rolling Stone Magazine  See a Sample Chapter in The Sydney Herald   Words in: Newsweek & Narratively   Get a copy of UNCULTURED: Digital, Audio, or Hardcopy or preorder the paperback as a holiday gift for a friend. Get an Autographed copy here: https://uncultureyourself.com/pages/uncultured-autographed   Takeaways Hair is a critical aspect of coercive control and dehumanization. Interactions between white women and black women regarding hair often lack consent and respect. Compliments about hair can be problematic and should be examined for underlying biases. Language plays a crucial role in discussing hair-related issues. There is a need for awareness and understanding of the deep-rooted biases and discrimination surrounding hair. Constant surveillance and appearance control have detrimental effects on individuals, including dehumanization and objectification. Standards of beauty and professionalism are often influenced by white supremacy and perpetuate discrimination and inequality. Reclaiming personal style and rejecting societal expectations is essential for self-discovery and empowerment. Intersectionality plays a significant role in how appearance standards are enforced and experienced in different contexts. Recognizing privilege and challenging stereotypes are crucial steps towards creating a more inclusive and equitable society. Sound Bites "White women's pearls: Clutching pearls to calm ourselves down" "Hair is critical in coercive control and dehumanization" "Being called in is not an attack" "There's a reason that constant surveillance is a form of torture and of breaking people." "I battle with some of those things, obviously, still. The internalized anti-blackness that I felt towards myself for so long just for having the hair I have." "Your time in the military gets harder. And when certain men don't understand this, I can just lean into them and say, aren't you short? And immediately they get it." Chapters 00:00 Introduction and the Concept of Clutching Pearls 08:38 Hair as a Form of Coercive Control 15:08 Challenging Microaggressions and Defending Personal Boundaries 28:12 The Emotional Journey of Embracing Natural Hair 33:34 The Significance of Hair in Relation to White Supremacy 39:36 Creating a Safe and Inclusive Environment for Discussions about Hair and Race 41:13 The Impact of Hair on Identity 43:23 Internalized Anti-Blackness and Beauty Standards 48:56 Hair Discrimination in the Military 52:43 Professionalism and Conformity 01:03:28 Challenging Beauty Standards 01:17:03 HWW Intro 16x9.mp4

In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the deconstruction of white supremacy. They explore the stages of leaving a cult and the process of deprogramming from the myth of white supremacy. They also touch on topics such as privilege, racism, and the impact of cult dynamics on society. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection, questioning societal norms, and working towards equality. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca discuss the importance of self-reflection and deconstructing the systems of white supremacy and patriarchy. They emphasize the need for white women to recognize their privilege and actively work to dismantle oppressive systems. They also discuss the power of vulnerability and the role of social media in spreading awareness and creating change. The conversation touches on topics such as the cult-like nature of societal systems, the challenges of living authentically within capitalism, and the role of art and creativity in personal growth.   Connect with Rebecca at:  Website:  https://www.whitewomanwhisperer.com Patreon:  https://www.patreon.com/whitewomanwhisperer TikTok: @white_woman_whisperer https://www.tiktok.com/@white_woman_whisperer?_t=8nslhOSSy8g&_r=1     Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/GroupBehaviorGal TikTok: @daniellamestyanekyoung Instagram: @_daniellamyoung https://www.uncultureyourself.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuFRBZ2w3QsYs7Km69keHsg UnAMERICAN Videobook   Get the book: UNCULTURED: A Memoir     "A propulsive memoir delivered in the honest tones of a woman who didn't always think she'd live to tell her story." --NYT     See a Sample Chapter in Rolling Stone Magazine  See a Sample Chapter in The Sydney Herald   Words in: Newsweek & Narratively   Get a copy of UNCULTURED: Digital, Audio, or Hardcopy or preorder the paperback as a holiday gift for a friend. Get an Autographed copy here: https://uncultureyourself.com/pages/uncultured-autographed   Takeaways There are three stages of leaving a cult: waking up, cracking the brainwashing, and physically and mentally leaving the cult. Deconstructing from the myth of white supremacy requires a process of deprogramming that can take years. White supremacy is like a cult, and deconstructing it involves questioning societal norms and recognizing the impact of privilege and racism. Cult dynamics, such as the need to defend the good intentions of the group, can be observed in white supremacy and other systems of oppression. Recognizing and challenging the sacred assumptions of white supremacy is essential for dismantling the system and creating equality. Recognize and reflect on your own privilege and the systems of white supremacy and patriarchy that perpetuate inequality. Challenge and dismantle oppressive systems by actively working to create change. Embrace vulnerability and use your voice to spread awareness and inspire others to take action. Question and deconstruct your own beliefs and behaviors to ensure they align with your values and promote equality. Find ways to live authentically and resist the pressures of capitalism and societal expectations. Use art and creativity as a means of personal growth and self-expression. Sound Bites "White supremacy is like a booger" "White supremacy starts radicalizing you the second you set foot here" "Deconstructing white supremacy is a process of self-reflection and questioning" "Hey, black women, if you're alone in a conference room and someone's about to walk in and it's gonna be a white person, would you rather be a white man or a white woman?" "White women are the men of women." "Once you can name it, you can fix it." Chapters 00:00Introduction and Background 02:32Growing Up in Diverse Communities and Discovering Cult Dynamics 05:22Creating Safe Spaces for Black People to Share with White People 07:49Leaving Seattle and Deconstructing White Supremacy 10:11White Supremacy as a Booger and Challenging Sacred Assumptions 13:07The Radicalization of White Supremacy and Deconstructing Beauty Standards 20:49The Interconnectedness of Patriarchy and White Supremacy 25:01The Need to Stack Rank and the Impact of White Supremacy 28:18Questioning the Cult of Capitalism and Valuing Humanization 31:04The Con of White Supremacy and the Benefits of Equality 37:02The Power of Vulnerability and Spreading Awareness 48:56Living Authentically and Resisting Capitalism 53:28Art and Creativity as Tools for Personal Growth