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That Hoarder: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding

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Sep 27, 2024 • 59min

#158 What does "trauma-informed" mean when it comes to hoarding? With Dr Jan Eppingstall

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  In today’s episode, I’m chatting with Dr. Jan Eppingstall, a Melbourne-based counsellor, about what it means to take a trauma-informed approach to hoarding disorder. Stick around as we break down why understanding trauma is crucial for effective support and treatment. Trauma-informed approaches to understanding and treating hoarding Importance of understanding trauma's impact Concerns about wellbeing inquiries without adequate support preparation Collaboration in Trauma-Informed Care Practical Implementation for Non-Therapy Roles** Incorporate trauma-informed principles Sensitivity to potential triggers Misconceptions and Communication Fear factor surrounding trauma and its treatment Detailed trauma disclosure unnecessary for effective support Client Autonomy and Professional Boundaries Respecting clients' communication preferences Retraumatisation in Hoarding Harm of forced clearances and strangers touching possessions Negative impact of language and actions on hoarders Respectful Support Practices Building Trust Importance of building trust before intervening in a hoarder's space Ensuring professionals genuinely practice trauma-informed care Over-explaining as a stress response Broad approach of trauma-informed care Factors influencing trauma perception Trauma Definition Trauma and Hoarding Commonality of trauma in hoarding histories A supportive framework rather than a treatment model Five Pillars of Trauma-Informed Care Assuming trauma backgrounds in hoarding behaviour clients Loss of Control in Trauma Trauma involves loss of control; care pillars help restore it Tracking and managing nervous system responses Importance of recognising client-specific signs Term misuse by minimally trauma-informed trained professionals Dangers of Misleading Trauma Informed Claims Proper understanding of trauma to avoid harm Non-therapists adopting trauma-informed principles Importance of feeling present and calm during therapy Teaching clients to feel safe and grounded Clear Boundaries in Therapy Trauma Types and Responses** Variability of trauma Explanation of retraumatisation Managing Retraumatisation
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Sep 20, 2024 • 35min

#157 Dehoarding dilemmas: Swallow the frog or save the worst til last?

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  In this episode, I look at two major – and opposing – strategies for dehoarding: "swallow the frog," where you handle the toughest task first, and "save the worst till last," which focuses on building confidence with easier tasks. I'll discuss the benefits and drawbacks of each approach and offer tips for blending them to fit your unique needs. Join to learn how to break down the overwhelming task of dehoarding into manageable steps. Swallowing the Frog Best when preventing access to essential areas (e.g., cooker, bath). Tackling tough tasks first can improve home functionality and reduce stress. Saving the Worst Till the Last Building confidence in dehoarding. Tasks that are emotionally charged but less visibly impactful (e.g., old photos). Utilising both approaches based on emotional resilience and situational needs. Experimentation with both strategies. Reflect on personality and typical approaches to difficult tasks. Planning strategies based on task suitability and personal motivation. Curiosity and trying different methods. Observing outcomes and refining methods. Balancing approaches for optimal dehoarding progress. Embracing flexible planning and adjusting as needed. Breaking Down Tasks Breaking tasks into smaller, manageable steps. Working for shorter, focused periods with breaks to prevent burnout. Building Confidence Addressing easier tasks first to build capability for more challenging tasks. Sorting manageable items before tackling emotionally difficult possessions. Mixing both "Swallow the Frog" and "Save the Worst Till Last" strategies. Examination of the psychological impact of task management. Discussing mental barriers, procrastination, and overwhelm. Emphasis on efficiency and making progress to avoid demoralisation. Strategies to manage overwhelming dehoarding tasks Identifying the "frog." Two opposite strategies for handling hard tasks. Resolve tasks early to minimise stress and discomfort. Breaking tasks into smaller chunks mitigates overwhelming discouragement. Starting with easier tasks provides steady motivation. Procrastination perpetuates stress from avoiding major tasks. Ease into dehoarding with manageable tasks first. Try both approaches, observe, adapt, and refine. Examining two strategies for tackling hard tasks in the context of dehoarding: "swallow the frog" (address tough tasks first) vs. saving the worst for last, focusing on their psychological impact on barriers, procrastination, and efficiency. Completing tasks alleviates stress and builds momentum for future tasks. Swallowing the frog can be discouraging if tasks are tougher than expected. Break tasks into smaller chunks to avoid demoralisation. Identify and prioritise your most challenging tasks, such as urgent issues or emotionally taxing items. Starting with smaller tasks provides steady motivation and achievement, offering quick wins that boost morale and maintain long-term productivity. Procrastination on the most urgent task causes continuous stress and anxiety, overshadowing achievement of smaller tasks. Start with moderately hard tasks, gradually advancing to harder tasks over time. Adapt approaches based on task suitability. Start with easier tasks to build confidence when dehoarding, and save emotionally challenging items for later. Use both approaches as needed based on your situation. Try both approaches and observe which helps you make the most progress. Keep adapting and refining based on your observations.
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Sep 13, 2024 • 38min

#156 Identifying the shopping triggers that create our urge to impulse buy

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/podcast-ep-156-identifying-the-shopping-triggers-that-create-our-urge-to-impulse-buy/   In today's episode, I’ll help you identify the triggers that make us want to acquire stuff and how to use that knowledge to combat the urges to buy impulsively. We’ll explore practical strategies like observing urges, delaying reactions, and using distractions to curb impulsive buying. Plus, we’ll uncover the deeper emotional and environmental triggers that drive compulsive shopping and how to address them. Emotional Triggers Identifying emotional triggers like stress, sadness, boredom, and anxiety. Understanding the role of dopamine in shopping behaviours. Recognising the temporary distraction of shopping from negative emotions. Environmental Triggers Discussing how shopping environments stimulate purchases through strategic design. Marketing tactics designed to exploit spending prompts. Ecommerce Optimisation Strategies ecommerce websites use to maximise purchases. Seamless and tempting buying experiences. Ease of Access The convenience and immediacy of online shopping. Encouraging impulsive purchases through immediate gratification. Social Triggers The influence of peer pressure, FOMO, and social validation. Buying to fit in or earn social approval. Self-Reflection and Values Evaluating whether purchases align with personal values. Seeking meaningful praise beyond materialistic validation. Journaling as a Tool Identifying and understanding personal triggers through journaling. Noting emotions, activities, and feelings before and after purchases. Pattern Identification Analysing journal entries to identify shopping patterns and triggers. Behaviour Change and Avoidance Adjusting behaviour to avoid known triggers. Implementing stress management techniques to handle stress-induced shopping. Mindfulness for Identifying Triggers Encouraging presence and consciousness in the moment. Observing sensations, thoughts, and feelings without judgment. Enhancing self-awareness for deliberate actions. Observing Urges Acknowledgment of the urge to buy and sitting with it. Comparing urges to waves – they rise and fall. Practicing distress tolerance during unpleasant urges. Delayed Reaction Technique Delaying purchase decisions to avoid impulsive buys. Starting with short delays (e.g. 1 minute) and extending them. Developing longer periods without giving in to urges over time. Distraction as a Tool Engaging in alternative activities. Contacting friends and talking through the urge. Reducing immediate impulses through distraction. Addressing the Root Causes Focusing on underlying issues (anxiety, depression, boredom). Pursuing therapy, self-help resources, lifestyle changes, or medical treatment. Avoiding Triggers Avoiding people or environments that encourage unnecessary shopping. Finding alternatives to shopping activities. Shopping in places that minimise impulse-buying triggers. Complexity and Difficulty Acknowledging the multifaceted nature of combating buying urges. Recognising triggers and managing urges requires effort and practice. Host’s personal experiences with guilt and shame from compulsive buying. Discussing the financial strain and relationship stress caused by impulsive purchases. Emphasising the mental and emotional health impacts. Impulsive shopping causes financial and relationship stress. Emotional triggers can lead to impulsive shopping. Awareness of emotions can reduce impulsive shopping. External triggers and dopamine drive impulsive buying. Question purchases' true value. Praise for values is deeper than material praise. Mindfulness helps identify triggers by observing sensations. Address anxiety holistically, considering therapy and lifestyle. Avoid triggers to reduce compulsive buying impulses. September's update for Dehoarding Darlings includes extras and a Q&A with Jan. Sign up at overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/darling. Bi-monthly dehoarding Zoom sessions: Sunday evenings (UK), Friday mornings (UK). Impulsive shopping causes financial and relationship stress, guilt, and clutter. Today's episode explores triggers to address and mitigate these issues. Emotional triggers like stress, boredom, sadness, and anxiety can lead to impulse shopping as a temporary escape, though this often results in further stress due to added clutter and financial strain. Awareness of evening fatigue helped me stop shopping out of boredom or anxiety. Recognising emotional triggers can prevent impulsive purchases. Marketing and environmental triggers compel people to buy impulsively for dopamine hits, involving extensive research. It feels great to get social validation from buying items, but it's worth questioning if possessions define our identity and relationships. Identify triggers for impulsive buying through self-reflection and journaling to align purchases with personal values. Mindfulness helps identify triggers by being present, aware of feelings, sensations, and thoughts, leading to greater self-awareness and deliberate actions. Address anxiety and depression through therapy, lifestyle changes, and avoiding triggers, rather than impulsive shopping. Avoid environments that trigger unnecessary shopping to break the habit. Find alternatives like meeting friends in different places or shopping online.
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Sep 6, 2024 • 49min

#155 Self-stigma and hoarding with Dr Jan Eppingstall

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  In this episode, Dr. Jan Eppingstall and I are exploring the impact of self-stigma and societal responsibility in hoarding. We look in depth at stigma and how it affects individuals with mental health conditions, especially hoarding disorder, and how self-stigma can damage us and prevent us from seeking help. Plus, we introduce a new segment — "permission slip". Stay tuned for some outtakes at the end! Impact of Public Stigma and Self-Stigma Dr. Jan Eppingstall explains public stigma, including stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination Key facets of public stigma: difference, disdain, and blame Understanding Self-Stigma and Public Stigma How stereotypes can affect self-stigma, using people's reactions to TV shows as an example The implications of self-stigma, including low self-esteem, hopelessness, and reluctance to seek treatment The interlinking of public stigma, self-stigma, shame, and self-consciousness, as well as self-blame and the impact of self-stigma on seeking help Variation in mental illness stereotypes by disorder Introduction of the "permission slip" segment Discussion on the compulsion to keep things and the completionist mindset Influence of Socioeconomic Status on Mental Illness Stigma Conversation about the perception of hoarding based on socioeconomic status and the value of items being kept Comparison of hoarding in different contexts: ample space and financial means versus living in a cramped environment Impact of space and wealth on hoarding, highlighted through a documentary about Celine Dion and her extensive costume collection Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) in Addressing Self-Stigma Dr. Eppingstall outlines the ACT approach, focusing on personal values and psychoeducation on relational frame theory to address self-stigma Cognitive behavioural therapy techniques like reframing and peer support groups to combat self-stigma, as well as radical acceptance through a 10-step process Influence of Cultural Beliefs and Social Factors on Stigma Discussion of the influence of cultural beliefs on mental illness stigma, including the impact of social factors on self-stigmatisation Protective factors against self-stigmatisation: quality of life, social relationships, and cultural acceptance of mental illness The impact of societal influences on self-stigma and the importance of understanding one's thought patterns without trying to banish them External stigma's potential influence on self-stigma, with a suggestion that marginalised individuals facing more external stigma might be more susceptible to self-stigmatisation Internalised social stigma leads to negative self-concept. Self-stigma affects help-seeking behaviours negatively. Questioning stigmatisation and hoarding in media. Cultural stigma influences self-stigmatisation of mental illness. Communities’ response to mental illness. Self-stigma's impact varies based on individual factors. Internalised stigma is the acceptance of negative societal stereotypes. Self-stigma creates harm, deters seeking help. Reflection on hoarding stigma and societal perceptions. Public stigma in different cultures affects self-stigmatisation and attitudes toward mental illness and treatment. Reflecting on community's approach to mental illness and its impact on self-stigma. Practicing radical acceptance, using self-acceptance talk and behaviour changes to move forward. Self-stigma affects people differently based on various factors such as personality, upbringing, and society. Different societies can influence how people perceive and react to self-stigma.  
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Aug 30, 2024 • 26min

#154 We don't need to love it. We just need to do it.

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/podcast-ep-154-we-dont-need-to-love-it-we-just-need-to-do-it/  Today, I explore the reality of dehoarding. From the thrilling sense of accomplishment to the mundane, hard, and sometimes emotionally difficult aspects, I cover it all. Join me as I discuss the ups and downs of the journey and why loving the process isn't a requirement - getting it done is what counts. The Importance of Persistence and Commitment in Dehoarding The need to keep going even when it's not thrilling or empowering Embracing the mundane and boring aspects of dehoarding Understanding that progress is more important than loving every moment of the process Recognising that dehoarding can include both rewarding and difficult experiences Using reminders of the end goal to cope with the challenging days Compassion and Self-Care in the Dehoarding Process Embracing self-compassion during difficult dehoarding days Utilising self-care practices as a way to cope with the process Understanding the importance of acknowledging and validating difficult experiences Acknowledging the necessity of perseverance and consistent effort in dehoarding Coping with Mundane and Monotonous Aspects of Dehoarding Recognising the importance of routine in the dehoarding process Strategies and techniques to cope with monotony and boring tasks Understanding the difference between emotional highs and lows, and coping with routine tasks Utilising rewards and mindful strategies to cope with tedious dehoarding tasks Redefining Success in Dehoarding Understanding that success is measured by effort, home improvement, and personal pride Acknowledging that dehoarding progress is not always thrilling or enjoyable Embracing that progress is still progress, regardless of its size or level of excitement Challenging unrealistic expectations set by influencers and social media about dehoarding Action and Commitment Despite Feelings Towards Dehoarding Encouragement to take at least one step in the right direction, regardless of loving the process Embracing the idea that it's okay not to love dehoarding every minute Recognising that commitment to dehoarding is a significant achievement in itself Affirming the capability to create a space one feels at home in, despite the ups and downs of the journey Dehoarding doesn't have to feel thrilling. Difficulties come, but remember your purpose. Feeling overwhelmed is normal during the decluttering process, but progress matters more than celebrating every step. Self-care involves activities like hot baths, TV time, and walks, paired with self-compassion to be effective. Reward self, be mindful, focus on present, seek support, value effort over success. Embrace the journey, take steps forward.
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Aug 23, 2024 • 28min

#153 Making a noticeable difference: Master the 80/20 rule to tame your hoarding habits

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  In today's episode, I look at how the Pareto Principle, also known as the 80/20 rule, can revolutionise our approach to decluttering. I discuss how focusing on the 20% of our possessions that cause 80% of our problems can lead to more impactful change with less effort, and how identifying the 20% of tasks that show the biggest results can help us to manage our energy and make visible progress. Join me as I break down this principle and explore how it can transform our mindset and approach to dehoarding. Introduction to the Pareto Principle Explanation of the Pareto Principle or the 80/20 rule Relevance of the Pareto Principle to hoarding and home management Impact of focusing on the 20% causing the most problems Identifying Impactful Tasks and Items The impact of expending energy on low-level tasks Importance of prioritising impactful tasks for noticeable change Making a dent in belongings by focusing on impactful items Brief history of Vilfredo Pareto and his observation Various contexts where the Pareto Principle is seen to apply Validation of the principle in different areas Applying the Pareto Principle to Your Home Strategic thinking in identifying items causing disruption Identifying 20% of belongings used most often Energy expenditure and impact of dehoarding actions Emotional Attachment & Rational Decision Making Emotional connection to belongings Encouraging rational assessment of belongings' value The role of emotions in retaining or discarding items Reassessing and Ongoing Vigilance Need for ongoing reassessment as space is cleared Importance of reassessing the 20% causing problems Frequency of reassessment and calibrating belongings Reflecting on the impact of the 80/20 rule in home management Pareto principle for hoarders. Pareto principle: 20% effort, 80% results. Reframe, prioritise, and declutter for efficient living. Identify essential items, discard unnecessary possessions strategically. Identify unnecessary items to make life easier. Reevaluate possessions and focus energy efficiently. Use the Pareto principle to focus on tasks with high impact. Identify and declutter items for a noticeable ease in daily life; use the 80/20 rule for organising and resolving space issues. Reassess belongings, focus on what matters.
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Aug 16, 2024 • 36min

#152 Unpacking Aesop: Misunderstood lessons from The Tortoise and the Hare on hoarding

I look at an old fable from when I was little and how I’ve changed my view on it completely. And, of course, how it relates to hoarding – and dehoarding. Acknowledging reaching 250,000 downloads for the podcast Dehoarding fast vs. slow and steady approach The benefits of dehoarding fast Getting a lot done in a short time Responding to emergency situations Harnessing sudden bursts of motivation The risks of dehoarding fast Burnout Impracticality of sustaining a fast pace in the long term Emphasising the importance of finding a balance between fast and slow dehoarding Acknowledging the benefits and drawbacks of both approaches The significance of Aesop's fable "The Hare and the Tortoise" Initial scepticism about the fable Understanding the importance of perseverance and consistency over speed Drawing parallels between the fable and dehoarding Primary Topic: Slow and steady work for dehoarding Sustained approach for dehoarding the entire home Making habits or new behaviours stick and become habitual Enhancing slow progress with focus and documentation Achieving objective progress through slow and steady work Suitability for long-term planning and sustainable change in behaviours and beliefs Riding the wave when the urge to throw into action arises Recognising when to work fast Potential drawbacks leading to complacency or exhaustion Balancing fast and slow dehoarding approaches Finding a balance for effective and sustainable progress Avoiding the pitfalls of extremes in dehoarding approaches Fast action can be encouraging and valuable. Sustainable pace fosters effective dehoarding. Slow, steady progress towards a liveable home.
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Aug 9, 2024 • 51min

#151 An amnesty on discarding guilt - is it possible? With Dr Jan Eppingstall

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  Dr Jan Eppingstall has had an idea, and it is as revolutionary as it is terrifying. We talk about it! Shifting focus from individual items to the bigger picture Creating a guilt-free zone for a limited time to honour values and experience more joy and fun in the future Putting aside certain values temporarily to create better conditions for the future Introduction of the concept of "household equilibrium" Understanding the emotional attachment to possessions based on lived experiences Behavioural and Emotional Aspects of Discarding Items Reluctance to discard out-of-date food due to guilt and fear of waste Emotional connection to possessions and the importance of using them Encouraging the usage and enjoyment of possessions Trauma-focused approach to discarding clutter Coping with the guilt and shame around wastefulness Making difficult decisions about discarding items Exposure to letting go and small, less risky decluttering tasks Letting go of controlling outcomes and focusing on wellbeing over perfect disposal Starting with low-risk categories when decluttering, such as wrapping paper Prove that terrible things do not happen when decluttering The importance of proportionality in the decluttering process Children's Belongings and Autonomy in Decluttering Clear guidelines for disposing of belongings that are not yours Contacting owners to collect items, especially for children's belongings Revisiting keepsakes periodically to reassess their importance Respecting children's decisions about their belongings Navigating the decluttering process with understanding and sensitivity Creating a Safe and Comfortable Living Environment Implementing an amnesty on existing rules and guidelines Suspending the acquisition of new items to keep the space in equilibrium Allowing space for new interests and hobbies to enter one's life without guilt Desire for perfection leads to unnecessary clutter. Temporary pause for a more balanced life. Stay safe and open to new experiences. Encouraging use of gorgeous clothes in daily life. Helping people cope with guilt and clutter to prioritise their well-being. Desire for perfection in decision making and finding balance. Some people value frugality but need to let go sometimes. Focus on physical safety, declutter for new hobbies, no guilt. Facing fears leads to growth and relief from guilt. Recommendation to limit exposure to items and practice letting go to avoid regret. Encourage using and enjoying clothes, shoes. Expressing love for a cherished mug.
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Aug 2, 2024 • 31min

#150 13 pieces of terrible hoarding advice you're sick of hearing

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  It’s the 150th episode, and I’ve got a special one for you. I’m tackling the 13 pieces of hoarding advice that you're really tired of hearing, and I’m hitting them head on! We've all been on the receiving end of well-meaning but utterly unhelpful advice when it comes to hoarding. From "just get rid of it" to "you're being lazy"… the list goes on. They may seem harmless, but they often overlook the emotional complexities and serious mental health challenges faced by people who hoard. Most importantly, I explain why these pieces of advice do more harm than good. Oversimplified solutions just won't cut it when it comes to overcoming hoarding disorder. Terrible Hoarding Advice "Just get rid of it" underestimates the emotional attachment Emotional attachment to possessions Overwhelming nature of such advice "It's just stuff" overlooks the significance of possessions The significance of possessions to hoarders Dismissal of the emotional connection to items "Get rid of things that don't spark joy" oversimplified and doesn't consider complexities Oversimplification of the decluttering process Failure to recognise the complexities of hoarding disorder Blaming hoarders for being lazy, weak, or selfish is not helpful Stress and shame reinforcement The impact of negative reinforcement on mental health Telling hoarders to be embarrassed or ashamed is counterproductive Exacerbation of hoarding tendencies Implications for mental health and stigma "Just get a skip" advice may create time pressure, anxiety, and public display Pressure and anxiety for hoarders Public display of possessions and potential distress Cleaning up a hoarder's space without consent creates mistrust and anxiety Impact on trust and mental well-being Reinforcement of trauma responses Suggesting to sell or have a yard/car boot sale oversimplifies things Complexity of hoarding disorder Dismissal of mental health issues Decluttering advice of doing one room a day or week underestimates the difficulty Emotional challenges of decision-making Complexity of hoarding disorder Three piles for keep, give away, and throw away is not effective as stand-alone advice Emotional attachment and decision-making Complexity of decluttering for hoarders Telling someone to try harder and give 100% effort at all times is unrealistic Unrealistic expectations and burnout Impact on mental health and sustainability Long-term and complex nature of decluttering Understanding the complexity of the process Mental and emotional focus of decluttering Hoarding as a Complex Process Comparison of decluttering to a marathon The endurance required for decluttering Criticism of advice containing the word "just" Casual dismissal of hoarding tendencies Encouragement to reconsider using "hoarder" casually Impact on stigma and understanding Consider emotional attachment in addressing hoarding issues. Hoarding disorder is complex and deeply personal. Blaming hoarders reinforces shame and hinder recovery. Skips can be a stressful solution. Car boot sale: a communal yard sale. Oversimplifying, dismissing mental health issues - not helpful. Avoid burnout by pacing and considering emotions. Simplify, declutter, and be mindful of health. Reconsider comparing mild mess to hoarding. Advice to declutter doesn't consider emotional attachment; drastic approach may cause fear and anxiety. Hoarding disorder is complex, possessions hold deep meaning, and one-size-fits-all approaches don't work. Blaming hoarding on laziness is unhelpful and untrue. Using skips as a solution for decluttering can create anxiety for some as it puts their possessions on public display. Car boot sales are similar to yard sales, with people selling items from their car boots in a car park on Sundays. Sellers might not get much for their cherished items. Avoid burnout by pacing efforts for long-term decluttering, including handling emotionally charged items with care. Casual use of mental health terms. Hoarding is not just about having too much stuff; it affects emotions and living conditions. Avoid comparing mild mess to hoarding.
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Jul 26, 2024 • 46min

#149 ADHD, hoarding and clutter with Susie Boutal, ADHD and Declutter Coach

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/  Susie Boutal is a qualified ADHD coach and decluttering expert. She joins me to talk about the intersection of ADHD, hoarding, and clutter. Susie shares valuable insights for anyone dealing with ADHD and hoarding. We cover the myth of laziness, the importance of open communication in relationships, managing hoarding behaviour, the impact of self-talk, and the influence of past experiences on self-perception and the responsibility to yourself and others in managing living spaces. Join us as we navigate the complexities of decluttering and hoarding with compassion and empathy, and gain valuable advice from Susie on nurturing a kinder inner dialogue. Negotiations and Agreements in Relationships Compassionate Expression of Needs Impact of Self-Talk and Past Experiences on Self-Perception Nurturing a Kinder Inner Dialogue Offering Yourself Compassion and Empathy ADHD and Clutter Impulsivity Compassionate Approach to Motivate Decluttering Guilt and Shame Breaking Tasks into Microtasks Tips for People Dealing with ADHD and Hoarding Self-Compassion Establishing Daily Non-negotiable Routines Breaking Down Tasks into Small Goals Approaching Uncertainty as a Space of Possibilities Overcoming Procrastination Identifying Procrastination Triggers Breaking Tasks into Achievable Goals Maximise Productivity and Time Management Reassessing Productivity in Small Time Periods Using Small Time Intervals for Decluttering Addressing Impulsivity in Acquiring Items Finding Long-Term Purpose Managing Living Spaces in Relationships Open Communication Setting Non-Negotiable Priorities Overcoming decluttering barriers with 5-minute tasks. Find purpose by identifying goals, prioritise passions. Setting rules, responsibility, and personal growth awareness. Establishing boundaries and agreements in relationships. Recognising patterns Impact of words can last a lifetime. Establish routines, question resistance, break tasks down. Embrace uncertainty as a challenge, not a threat. Clutter linked to ADHD, trauma, mental health, impulsivity, and seeking new things. Focusing on microtasks for motivation and habit building. Decluttering seems overwhelming, but starting with small tasks can be motivating Find purpose, set long-term goals, prioritise over short-term impulses. Setting rules and responsibility to overcome impulses and seek long-term goals. Open communication and defining nonnegotiables is crucial in living together respectfully. Negotiating boundaries and agreements in all relationships, including regarding space and activities. Recognising negative patterns, understanding origins, finding benefits in change, and being kinder to yourself. The lasting impact of hurtful words. Routines, self-reflection, and breaking tasks down. Embracing uncertainty leads to growth, while fear of uncertainty causes paralysis.

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