The Verywell Mind Podcast

Whether you’ve gone through a bad breakup or you’re struggling with a financial situation, tough times make it tempting to feel sorry for yourself.But self-pity is self-destructive. It’s much different than sadness. Allowing yourself to feel sad can be part of the healing process. Feeling sorry for yourself, however, will keep you stuck in a place of pain.So on today’s Friday Fix, I share why it sometimes feels good when we feel sorry for ourselves. I also explain the top five reasons why you shouldn’t do it and the concrete strategies that can prevent self-pity. These strategies can also help you find your way out if you’re already feeling sorry for yourself. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Most of us feel pressure to keep going when things feel hard. In fact, we sometimes think that the harder something is to do, the longer we should stick with it. We’ve been told things like, “Quitters never win,” and “Never ever give up!”Certainly pushing yourself even when things get hard can build character. Grit, perseverance, and hardiness are all key components of mental strength.But does quitting a job you hate mean you weren’t strong enough to hack it? On today’s Friday Fix, I share how to know when you should quit and when you should keep going. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

LeAnn Rimes is one of the most successful recording artists of all time, selling over 37 million records worldwide to date. She also hosts a podcast called Wholly Human which is dedicated “to helping others overcome the fragmentation that keeps us from feeling more complete and connected in today’s world.”On today's show, LeAnn talks about how she takes care of herself and what it means to be 'wholly human.' Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Justin Baldoni is best known for his acting role on Jane the Virgin. He's also a filmmaker, author, and podcast host. His new book, Man Enough, talks about how we can redefine masculinity.In a world where "acting tough" is often confused with "being strong," Justin is paving the way to understanding what it really means to be a man. He’s open about his struggles and the ways in which he gains support. And he is clear that he continues to make mistakes but considers himself to be a work in progress. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you ever thought about how you deal with uncomfortable emotions? Do you start scrolling through your smartphone whenever you feel the slightest bit bored? Do you text an ex who isn’t good for you whenever you feel lonely?We usually don’t think much about these habits we’ve established in life. And we rarely reflect on how little habits affect us so much in the big picture. The way you respond to uncomfortable emotions establishes patterns in your life. You might not even recognize them even though you reach for the same go-to solutions every time.It’s quite possible that some of these solutions actually introduce new problems into your life or make your existing problems worse. This is just one reason we establish unhealthy patterns in our lives. In this Friday Fix, I share the other reasons why we get stuck relying on tempting shortcuts or avoiding the things we need to face.I also share how to break free from unhealthy patterns so we can create the kind of life we actually want to live.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's guest is Dr. Mark Goulston, a psychiatrist who learned the value of listening to people. His wisdom has led him to become a consultant to many major organizations as well as a hostage negotiator trainer.He is also the author of several best-selling books, including Just Listen, Get Out of Your Own Way, and Talking to Crazy. On today's episode, Dr. Goulston explains the benefits you'll gain when you become a better listener, how your listening skills benefit others, and how to start sharpening your listening skills today.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Whether you lost your cool when a telemarketer called you at an inconvenient time or you sent a scathing email you wish you could take back, it’s likely that all of us have had times when our anger caused us to act in an irrational manner.Anger is a normal, healthy emotion. But it needs to be managed. If it isn’t, it can lead to aggressive and destructive behaviors. Whether your anger is a big problem or it just leads to the occasional issue, there are likely things you can do to manage your anger better. In fact, we likely all have room for improvement. On this Friday Fix, I share how to get better at calming yourself down and managing those angry feelings in a healthy way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Jessica Lahey has spent more than 20 years as a teacher, including five years teaching in a drug and alcohol rehab center for adolescents. She is a New York Times Best-Selling author.She's also a self-described alcoholic who set out on a quest to learn how to prevent her kids from falling into a generational cycle of addiction.In this episode, she talks about her new book, The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence. She shares how to empower kids to refuse substances, how to talk about alcohol in an effective manner, and how to decrease the chances that a child will develop a drug or alcohol problem. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why would a med student party all night before a big test? And why would someone who has almost all their debt paid off go out and buy a car they can’t afford? Self-sabotage is a strange concept. We claim we want to reach a goal, and we complain about the obstacles that threaten our chances at success. Yet more often than not, the biggest hurdle to achievement is ourselves. We sabotage ourselves in some pretty clever ways. It’s a phenomenon I see quite often as a therapist. Yet some people don’t even realize they’re doing it.Why on earth would we blow our own chances of success?In this episode, I explain the psychology behind self-sabotage including the seven major reasons why we do it. Becoming more aware of these reasons can help you recognize self-sabotage when it’s happening. I also explain how to fix it so you can get out of your own way and start working toward your goals. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Ramsey is a psychiatrist. But rather than focus solely on prescribing antidepressants or antianxiety medications, he helps people change their diet. He's a firm believer in the fact that most people can help themselves feel better by changing what they eat.In this episode, he talks about his new book, Eat to Beat Depression and Anxiety. Some of the things he talks about are the most important foods you should be eating right now, the nutrients most people aren't getting, and the strategies you can use to take charge of your brain chemistry.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices