EmPowered Couples with The Freemans

Do you find that you are physically together with your partner more than ever, yet still feeling disconnected? How could this be right? Well, connection isn’t just about proximity. Connection also isn’t something that you can just count on always being there. It takes attention and intention just like anything in life that you want to grow.  Today’s topic came from multiple messages that we received within one hour. One of the questions saying: “What to do when you get disconnected? We are really intense, when we are close we are best friends. But sometimes we get into a cycle of and it’s hard to get out of being disconnected. It gets bad enough that we feel like pushing the wedding away...this is not what we want, we want to be partners and make it work” We also did the drawing for the podcast reviews and the winner is…. Betty on Instagram. So Betty please message us on IG so we can get your address to send your gift!    In this podcast episode you will take away:  What really fuels the feeling of connection in your relationship What is missing when you feel disconnected 4 ways to grow and deepen your connection   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.    Resources For Your Relationship: We announced our newest book last Friday and the title is... THE ARGUMENT HANGOVER! 📚 Pre Order your copy of TheArgumentHangover.com now and claim these bonuses: (FREE Mini course, Debrief An Argument Workbook, and FREE event ticket for Valentines Day)📚   Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube Follow us on Instagram

Trust is the feeling of: “you have my back”. When trust is high in any relationship you can feel that you can fly, fail, and yet still be accepted and loved by your partner. This is so foundational for a healthy, happy relationship that wants to be able to grow. When trust has been broken, whether from a big or small event, it harbors doubt, resentment, and suspicion in the relationship.  Today’s topic came from several DM’s and IG poll votes, plus a financial trust question from Teresa: “After repeat offenses running the gamut of petty to severe in nature on occasion; how do you rebuild trust in a real way? I am between being codependent in needing to trust deeply and frustrated because I feel like I never can 100% trust because of the continued offenses and boundary crossing.”  One other question was: “It was about a promise of not doing something, then doing it and lying about it to my face….multiple times. So broken promises/outright lies/secrets. How to make amends and be consistent with everything?” Thank you everyone for the questions and even Alicia from the book club, being honest about wanting to rebuild trust.    Today from this episode you’ll takeaway: What trust really means within your relationship The major effects a lack of trust can have Why you or your partner would break a promise or even lie 4 ways to rebuild trust in your partner and the relationship.   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.   Resources For Your Relationship: Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (Home Edition) to enhance your communication skills together Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube Follow us on Instagram

So you have had a fight in your relationship, now what…? Right after you might feel angry or sad, certainty disconnected, or even that you do not want to be around them. This is a tough place to be in for your relationship; HOWEVER this is not the part you need to be worried about initially. It's about how long are you going to be in this period of being disconnected! This episode is all about how to reconnect after you have had a fight or disagreement.  Today’s topic came from a question on a DM from Isha on saying: “Can you include in your podcast about how to talk after a fight? How to listen and accept each other’s perspectives regarding a situation that has led to a fight?” Thank you for the question Isha as this is a topic we have gotten many questions about too.  Today from this episode you’ll takeaway: The 3 “Don’ts” for after a big fight  For example the action that has you sweep things under the rug Then the 3 things to “Do” after a fight to reconnect together.  For example how to get to the real root cause (and not what you “think” the argument is really about)   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.  Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (Home Edition) to enhance your communication skills together Subscribe and watch The Empowered Couples Show Live on YouTube Follow us on Instagram

All of a sudden the personality differences that attracted you to your partner earlier in the relationship, become the things that frustrate you and cause tension! How can this be? Once you find yourself in this place it can feel like your own needs are not getting met. For example maybe you are naturally more spontaneous and playful than your partner who ‘makes decisions slower’ and likes to structure and plan things out.    Today’s topic came from Heather’s question on Instagram that said: “My partner and I realized a key difference in the way we both operate. I have a need for spontaneity and often throw ideas out and expect him to roll with it. He has a need, however, to think things through and plan things out well in advance. How can we both be sensitive to each other’s needs while still feeling our own needs are met?”   Form today’s episode you’ll takeaway: Why this dynamic of tension happens in your relationship  How you can bring awareness to your differences first to leverage them as a team rather than have them be things you try to change in your partner Two tips you can implement right now to be sure both of your needs get met and you both feel balanced in your decision making together as a true team.  About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.  Wanna take the relationship assessment? First get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping) to join the book club! Follow us on Instagram

Swinging for the fence right from the start here… criticism in your relationship in one of the top four things that lead to disconnection and divorce (*The Gottman Institute). Even besides that fact, being criticized by your partner just sucks! It leads to arguments, conflicts, and a loss of connection at best.  Though it may seem like a topic that you want to tell your partner to listen to, because this is something that THEY need to work on, there are key things that you BOTH can work on to better receive feedback, give feedback, and the major difference between criticism. With this you will be able to use feedback in your relationship at the right time and to evolve your relationship to be even better!  This topic came up from the question that Aaron G submitted in the Power Couple Book Club. He asked: "how can I take criticism better? I tend to get defensive, then nothing is solved and things are weird for a few days.” From this episode you’ll: Know the difference between criticism and feedback How to take feedback without getting defensive How to both give and receive feedback in your relationship to become stronger together   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.  Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping) Follow us on Instagram

So here you are, trying to share with your partner something that is important to you and something that you feel emotion around… Then they say something like: “you are overreacting, it’s not that big of a deal”,  or even “that doesn’t make sense!” You immediately feel invalidated and maybe that your feelings don’t matter, right? This causes many upsets and conflicts for couples and at the very least, disconnects you from love and understanding from your partner.  Today’s topic came from a coaching session we had this week, in which we then posted this question to our couples community: “Do you ever notice that you feel your emotions are invalidated by your partner, what has you feel that way?” There were many replies and great examples of the words and actions that caused people to feel invalidated (we will cover a number of them).  From this episode you’ll take away: What causes you to feel invalidated The 3 reasons why this is used as a  defensive mechanism The new actions to take to keep from invalidating each other’s emotions   Quotes: “Yes there are universal truths, but there are also personal truths, for both you and your partner. What you BOTH are feeling right now are both true for YOU!” - Aaron    About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved. Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping) Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (online home edition) to practice communication skills, resolve recurring disagreements, and connect more than ever! Follow us on Instagram

You know those things your partner says or does that TRIGGER you? YES trigger, meaning you have an automatic emotion that comes up that then causes you to get upset. Then from there you may both do things that hurt and keep you disconnected for hours, days, or even weeks!  You’re not alone, we received hundreds of comments when we asked the community what triggers them in their relationship. This episode comes directly from a post on FB and Instagram about “what does your partner do that triggers you?”   We share what many of those responses were PLUS: The root cause of your personal triggers 3 things you can do differently when you do get triggered And how to talk calmly to your partner about triggers so they can support you   Quotes: “It’s not your partner’s responsibility to tip-toe around your emotional triggers. It is your opportunity to identify them, heal them and then ask them to support you.” - Jocelyn “Become aware, then share!”  - Aaron   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.  Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay shipping) Get 50% OFF The Couples Workshop (online home edition) to practice communication skills, resolve recurring disagreements, and connect more than ever! Follow us on Instagram

Avoiding conflicts in the short term only lead to resentment building in the long term! Though you may have adapted the philosophy of avoiding conflicts from other examples that you saw, or your own past experiences. It hurts your relationship by turning into resentment. You can even be a happy and growth focused couple but can start to build a rift in just a few days time.  So we took this topic of releasing resentment or getting past old hurts from Andrew on Instagram and Teresa on Facebook. They both essentially asked: “How do I let go of resentments or past hurts in my relationship now?”   So in this episode today you’ll takeaway: Why and how resentments build up from avoiding conflicts and withholding communications The steps to take to release any past hurts or resentments How to use the steps to ‘close the circle’ on future arguments, so that they don’t repeat themselves in the future and turn into resentment later on.  From listening you will feel free from keeping things held inside and clear about what you can do next to create connection out of conflict.    About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram   Resources For Your Relationship: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved! Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay for shipping) Start your on-the-go Communication Course For Couples

Facing any time of challenge let alone a global down economy can have you wondering and doubting if you can pursue your passion. You may be wondering is this really the time to start or even grow a business (especially as a couple)?  You are about to find the answer to that and much more as Chris and Lori Harder share how they went from humiliation in the 2008 crash to building the foundation of the multiple million dollar companies they run TOGETHER.  You will hear how the requirements to be successful especially when you back is against a wall, you pivot, and reinvent yourself individually and as a couple! Learn how even having a good economy is the enemy to a great business! Plus how being business partners will take your romantic relationship to levels other couples won’t ever reach.    Questions Ask In The Interview: You two started a business together in the 2008 crash when you were laid off from what many would say is a steady job. How did you get resourceful rather than victims? Can you really pursue what you are passionate about or do you have to do the thing that pays the bills?  Do you think now is a good time to start or grow a business as a couple? Or at least be thinking about additional income streams? What challenge did you two encounter in your relationship because you also become business partners? How do you make financial decisions when you don’t necessarily agree with each other, and what about if that turns into a fight? How do you start to repair any broken trust that comes up whether in your romantic or business relationship?    Quotes: “Good is the enemy of great!” - Chris Harder “You are ever only one conversation away from your desired  outcome” - Lori Harder   Resources From The Freemans: Apply to Become a Certified Relationship Coach & start a coaching business Get a FREE hard copy of the book 📚 The New Power Couple (just pay for shipping) Follow us on Instagram   About The Guests:  Lori & Chris Harder aren’t your average couple, they are truly a power couple for their strengths as individuals and as a couple. Lori Harder is a best selling author, Forbes Top Rated podcast host, founder of ‘Lite Pink’ and ‘The Bliss Project’. Chris Harder is an entrepreneur, investor, avid philanthropist, and podcaster. After an 11-year career as an executive and partner in the banking industry, he retired from banking in 2011 and partnered with his wife, Lori, to start and scale four different multi-million dollar businesses, along with investing in several other successful startups. Connect More With The Guests: Apply for their grant for entrepreneurs Chris Harder’s Instagram  Lori Harder’s Instagram

Ever have those moments that don’t feel like they’re going your way? It could be that you suddenly got into a disagreement on a seemingly great day, your kids aren’t acting like you want them to, maybe one of you lost your job during the quarantine period…..or maybe your dog stepped on a cactus early in the morning (like our story) This episode is all about how to let go of RESISTING the present moment and what is HAPPENING. When you’re resisting what’s happening, you can get frustrated and not have a great attitude.  We’ll share a relatable story from how our day did not go as we expected this week, but how we switched our attitude about it quickly!  Connect More With Us: As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.  Get $50 off the Communication Course For Couples. (use coupon code: PODCAST)