EmPowered Couples with The Freemans

Defensiveness is a learned behavior to compensate for something going on beneath the surface.  A few common sources of defensiveness in relationship: A lack of feeling emotionally safe because they often feel invalidated Taking something personally (and making it mean something different than what was said) Fear of being judged, not loved, abandoned, or punished An attachment to a certain perspective about themselves or the situation Here’s the thing...if you and your partner perpetually react with defensiveness, you will leave conversations unresolved, build up more and more tension, and/or get to the point where you feel like you’re walking on eggshells. So today’s podcast episode goes deeper into understanding why defensiveness shows up in your relationship PLUS how to break this pattern, so you communicate openly and constructively.   Resources For Your Relationship: Book a private Couples Session with us. The first one is discounted so you can get a sense that our style WORKS! Read testimonials, details, and schedule one here. Read our newest book, The Argument Hangover. Get $200 of bonus resources, including a course and workbook. HERE   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.   Please leave a Review of the Show if you have not, it helps us reach even more couples! 

Do you and your partner feel perfectly aligned and on the same page? Do you ever feel caught off guard by a comment your partner makes about being dissatisfied somewhere in your relationship? If so, it's time for a Family Meeting Check-in!  We define a"Family Meeting" as: a designated time to have an intentional, judgment-free conversation together as you discuss your relationship + life. You each get to share your satisfaction in the 9 core areas of your relationship/life, and openly listen to each other. A few critical benefits of these "Family Meetings": it eliminates that frustrating moments where you blindside each other throughout the week to discuss things when it's not the best time you can address challenges or areas of lower satisfaction before it BUILDS up into resentment you ensure you're on the same page as a couple and feel like a team it creates emotional safety and intimacy But here's what a weekly Family Meeting is NOT: a time to defend yourselves, point fingers, complain, or start a fight. In this episode you will hear us go through our own family meeting, so that you have the tools to communicate with each other to be even more on the same page.    Resources For Your Relationship: 1) To get your Family Meeting Worksheet either: DM us on IG @Meet_TheFreemans or Email: connect@newpowercouples.com   2) Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)

No matter the stage of relationship you are in, it can seem like you and your partner have different sex drives. Often we think this means frequency, but in this episode we interview Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, and her husband Xander who collaborates with her on content, to discover just what sex drive and compatability means.  In this episode you will realize the different forms and types of intimacy, how to raise your satisfaction in your sex life, and most imprtantly how to bring up this conversation with your partner. No matter where your satisfaction is now or how compatibility you feel, you will be able to take the steps to having a more open and pleasurable sex life and drive together.   Questions Asked in this Interview:  It would be easy to assume that “sex drive” is just the level of desire and freqency for sex. But what does it really mean?  Do you see that most couple of the same or different sex drives? Is it biologically true that your sex drive diminishes with age (for women)? Or what are things that get in the way of sexual satisfaction? Do you think people should say “YES” to their partner’s attempt to have sex (if they don’t feel like it)? What should a partner say if they aren’t enjoying (or are just bored with) certain things in the bedroom without hurting their partner?  What are two new questions a couple can ask each other to take the next steps to a more understanding and satisfying sex life?   Connect More With the Vanessa:  Instagram: @Vanessamarintherapy Learn more about her courses and sex drive guides: vmtherapy.com   Resources For Your Relationship: The last opportunity for the 5 spots to take the Relationship Assessment and do the call with us. This assessment (paired with the call with us) is literally the most impactful thing you can do for your relationship and it’s discounted from $1000 to just $147. To snag one of those 5 spots, either text or email us: Text: 602-321-5652 Email: connect@newpowercouples.com

What’s the main difference between being just “roommates” with someone vs romantic partners? The answer: the depth of emotional intimacy. Of course you’ve heard us say that a relationship requires all the functional things (the to-do list, things around the house, errands, etc)...but that can easily consume your attention and diminish your emotional intimacy.  In fact, we received a private message yesterday saying, “how do I create more emotional intimacy with my wife?” Which shows that many people don’t know what actually builds emotional intimacy. So we’re answering that question in today’s podcast episode. Tune in to hear 4 Keys to Unlock Emotional Intimacy...that can be implemented no matter how busy you two are in life (or the current level of relationship you are at)!   Resources For Your Relationship: The 5 discounted spots to take the Relationship Assessment and do the call with us went SO fast last episode, that we decided to offer 5 more. Why? Because this assessment (paired with the call with us) is literally the most impactful thing you can do for your relationship and it’s discounted from $1000 to just $147. To snag one of those 5 spots, either text or email us: Text: 602-321-5652 Email: connect@newpowercouples.com   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Are you working to rebuild trust in your relationship? Perhaps a lie was told, or a boundary was crossed….but you’re committed to repairing it and not ending the relationship. Today you’ll meet Joy and Peter Harrington who share very candidly about repairing broken trust after his long term use of porn. They share some radically true things about whether porn use is healthy in a relationship and what to do if your partner denies crossing a boundary.   Resources For Your Relationship: You can connect with Joy and Peter Harrington here on Instagram   To schedule a private coaching session to rebuild trust, go here   Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

A male client was vulnerable last week and said, "we've been together 10 years, have 3 beautiful children, and have great careers. And while I think we should be closer than ever, I feel more distant than ever." This powerfully shows that being emotionally connected does not have to do with time or reaching life milestones together. In fact, couples grow apart emotionally from 4 subtle behaviors that build up over time. We go into these deeper reasons, as well as the 4 levels of a relationship so you can start to notice which level you are at, and how to progress to the next within your own relationship!   Resources For Your Relationship: This month we are giving 5 spots to do Relationship assessment + call with us. Normally you can only take the assessment in our $1000 program. We’re opening up these 5 spots for only $147. To snag one of those spots, either: Text us: 602-321-5652 Message us on IG: @meet_thefreemans Email us at: connect@newpowercouples.com   After June 2021: Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Maybe this is a question you have never thought of! Have you ever taken the time to think about the different types of sex you might be in the mood for? For most the answer is, no… Taking this question one step further, depending on your mood on a certain day of week, you might be more or less open to certain types of sex with your partner.  Ok that was a great thing to think about, but now the next part is to express this whole new world to your partner. Given this area of sex and intimacy often is uncomfotable and vulnerable, you can find it dificult to be fully expressed with your partner without some pushback or defensiveness. So what to do? This episode is the first of three episodes around sex and intimacy that we will be interviewing other relationship experts. In today’s episode you will meet Seth and Melanie Studley who have been married for 16 years and have three kids. Seth is a licensed marriage and family therapist and together they are the hosts of the “Anatomy of Marriage, Family, and Sex” podcast, along with their “Anatomy of Marriage” app!  From them you will realize that there are different types of sex energy and moods, and on your journey of marriage, you will have the tools to express this desires as they come up in different seasons.   Get to Know the Studleys: Anatomy of Marriage App Anatomy of Marriage, Family, Sex Podcast   Questions Asked in the Interview: What has your journey been as a couple in getting more comfortable and exploratory with sex and intimacy? You mentioned that there are different kinds of sex based on the mood...can you describe the types? How should a partner communicate about the energy they are in the mood for? How do you suggest couples talk about this with each other? How should these conversations be approached when you have kids? How and when do you have these conversations with or around them?   Guest Quotes: "Connection & pleasure is the goal, expression can be different based on energy mood" "Clarity is Kindness"   Resources For Your Relationship: You can also sign-up for a 2-on-2 Relationship Breakthrough Session here Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)

You know those moments when you're sharing your emotion, and your partner responds with logic? They might say “that’s not how that happened, that doesn’t make sense, or that wasn’t my intention.”  It can make you feel invalidated and  misunderstood, which hurts because your partner is the one you should feel most understood by, right? You might feel that they don’t listen to you and certainly that they don’t understand you. Or even to the point where you feel that you just aren’t on the same page.  Logic and emotion are both important in relationships and communication....but often at different times! It's important that you two discover how to balance both of them, and know when logic is needed vs emotional understanding.   Resources For Your Relationship: You can also sign-up for a 2-on-2 Relationship Breakthrough Session here Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

Why can’t the past just stay back in the past?! How often in your relationship do you feel that you resolved an issue, only to have it come back up again later? What about making a decision together about a big life event, only to doubt it (or your partner) later?  This “past thing” is a block for many couples that keep them feeling in the same place and not making the progress they really want. In this motivational episode we will cover how to keep your past events from impacting your present.   Resources For Your Relationship: You can also sign-up for one of the few monthly available 2-on-2 Relationship Breakthrough Sessions here Order our newest book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.

How do you two tend to act after an argument? If you don’t have a solid repair process, you likely are keeping the issue lingering and unresolved. When this happens you can lose trust in each other, erode love and connection, and just turn this into an emotional trigger for the future.  In today’s episode, we’ll cover 3 mistakes that couples make after an argument, and you’ll likely find that you have done all 3! But we also share what you need to do INSTEAD to truly close the loop on the conversation.   Resources For Your Relationship: You can also sign-up for a 2-on-2 Relationship Breakthrough Session here   About Us: We’re The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.