Therapist Uncensored Podcast

Pause to add consciousness to your next intention. As a certified Neonatal Therapist, Sue Ludwig has dedicated her life to not only the physical development but the emotional development of her patients. Ludwig brings intentionality to each moment by strategically working to regulate patients’ nervous systems during their time in the NICU. Her process focuses on the interconnection of the mind and body and aims to support the child’s development in vulnerable situations. She explains the importance of proper technique to avoid disrupting the nervous system and the long-term effects on neurodevelopment. Through her personal and professional journeys, Sue Ludwig has learned the value of being present in small moments to build deeper connections and experience lasting results. “Humans are different in that we’re meant to co-regulate, we are meant to be with a parent or adult. The way that we show up as parents and how calm we are – the better the babies are able to absorb our presence.” Time Stamps for “What Tiny Humans Can Teach Us About Adult Relating, with Sue Ludwig (197)” 1:11 – What do we mean by energy 6:05 – The power of bringing intention to energy 10:36 – Regulating babies’ nervous systems 14:09 – Properly performing the “hand hug” when holding small babies 17:58 – A proper “hand hug” for a more developed baby 20:50 – Importance of connection between the child and parent 21:38 – The “hand hug” technique for a full-term baby 27:54 – Co-regulation from the parent’s perspective 30:52 – Sue’s personal introduction to intentionality 42:31 – Embracing that development is never-ending Resources for  Sue Ludwig’s Website National Association of Neonatal Therapists (NANT) American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA) National Coalition for Infant Health (NCFIH)  Hope for HIE – Website   About our expert guest, Sue Ludwig Sue Ludwig is passionate about improving the quality of life for infants who begin their journey in the NICU, and the professionals who serve them. She is a sought-after speaker, consultant, and writer. A licensed occupational therapist and certified neonatal therapist, she is president and founder of the National Association of Neonatal Therapists (NANT), where she uses a blend of clinical expertise, innovation, and leadership to support the advancement of this specialized field on a global level. Sue is the media expert in neonatal therapy for the American Occupational Therapy Association, a member of the steering committee for the National Coalition for Infant Health, and a medical advisory board member for Hope for HIE. She has received the Laura Edmunds Lectureship Award from UMass Memorial Medical Center, the Individual Contribution to Maternal and Child Health Award from the National Perinatal Association, and the Alumni Professional Achievement Award from Eastern Kentucky University. She has also been named a Graham’s Foundation Resilience Honoree. Sue’s book Tiny Humans, Big Lessons was published in March of 2022. Today, Sue lives in Cincinnati, Ohio, with her husband and a few dogs, and has two grown children. Click here to view this episode’s transcripts We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.   Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – please do support them to support us! With HelloFresh, you get farm-fresh, pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep. Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh to make home cooking easy, fun, AND affordable – that’s why it’s America’s #1 meal kit!  Go to HelloFresh.com/tu21 for 21 free meals plus free shipping!  Calm helps you stress less, sleep more and live a happier, healthier life. Their guided meditations, sleep stories, relaxing music tracks, and daily movement sessions are all designed to give you the tools to improve the way you feel. Over 100 million people around the world use Calm. Even if you’ve never meditated before, you’ll get the support you need to reduce stress, improve focus, and uplift your mood. If you go to Calm.com/TU, you’ll get a special offer of 40% off a Calm Premium Subscription, and new content is added every week. Dipsea is an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. They bring scenarios to life with immersive soundscapes and realistic characters. Discover stories about second-chance romances, adventurous vacation flings, and hot and heavy hookups. Radically inclusive, Dipsea has stories for straight and queer listeners, and 56% of stories are voice acted by people of color. Let Dipsea be your go-to place to spice up your me-time, explore your fantasies, relax and unwind, or heat things up with a partner. For listeners of the show, Dipsea is offering an extended 30-day free trial when you go to DipseaStories.com/TU   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Elizabeth A. Stanley, Ph.D., is an associate professor of security studies at Georgetown University and the creator of Mindfulness-Based Mind Fitness Training (MMFT)®, taught to thousands in civilian and military high-stress environments. In 2019, Dr. Stanley published “Widen the Window: Training your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recovering from Trauma” – a highly praised resource known for providing tools to heal and thrive. We are replaying this discussion we shared with Dr. Stanley in early 2022 as a reminder of the power of expanding our windows of tolerance and building resiliency.   To check out the original show notes for Elizabeth Stanley’s episode, click here!   Resources related to Elizabeth Stanley Ph.D.’s Episode  Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s Website “Widen the Window: Training Your Brain and Body to Thrive During Stress and Recover from Trauma” – Purchase “Mindfulness-Based Mind-Fit Training” – Online Courses “Optimizing the Caveman Within Us” – Dr. Elizabeth A. Stanley’s TedTalk Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.    Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Contact Bolte-Taylor to find out how her work is being applied and sign up for certification. Since this podcast first aired, Sue Marriott worked with a very small group of people with Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor in the first round of Whole Brain Living certification. Contact Jill Bolte-Taylor to find out how to participate. Learn about 4 major characters (skill sub-sets) in your mind as a way to understand neuroanatomy and how to best use the power of your whole mind. NOTE: For our private Neuronerd community, don’t forget to check out the deep dive series on Whole Brain Living.  Join to access it for as little as $5 a month at www.therapistuncensored.com/join. Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor is a Harvard-trained neuroanatomist who suffered a stroke that led her on a path to rediscovering her brain. At the end of 2021, we had the privilege of discussing the inner workings of the mind with Dr. Bolte Taylor. We thought this was the perfect episode to kick off the new year, full of eye-opening insights that could help improve the way you live your life.   To check out the original show notes for Jill Bolte-Taylor’s episode, click here! RESOURCES: Check out her TED Talk, My Stroke of Insight (join the inspiration of 28 million viewers!)  How to do a Brain Huddle by Jill Bolte-Taylor. Free Webinar Series and Contact Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor HERE  Hear more psychology and neuroscience in previous episodes: Episode 93 Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Stephen Porges Episode 110 Story Follows State (more polyvagal theory) with Deb Dana   Episode 117 Resilience Trauma and the Brain with Dr. Bruce Perry  Please join us today!  By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.  Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Earlier this year, we had the privilege of speaking with Loretta J. Ross, a world-renowned human-rights activist. In 2022, she was acknowledged by the MacArthur Foundation for her dedication to social justice, human rights, and reproductive justice. As a well-deserving recipient, we couldn’t think of a better episode to close out the year. The holidays can sometimes feel draining and the tension from familial relationships can take a toll. Loretta J. Ross’s words of wisdom and “calling in” are a great extra resource during the season. View her MacArthur Foundation Award here Check out our original show notes for this episode, here!   And follow us on our social media pages to get the latest updates and information: Instagram, Youtube, Facebook, & Twitter! We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Supercast premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper insights into select content, and unique study opportunities. Like what you’re hearing? A great way to help others find these resources is to rate and review wherever you get your podcasts. This is an easy and effective way for those seeking assistance to be able to find it. Thank you so much for your support.

Many answers to our challenges are already inside of us. In today’s episode, find new perspectives on how culture and trauma affect our navigation within the world. Using bottom-up approaches, she explains how addictions are regulation strategies and provides tools to deeper connect to our nervous systems and ourselves. Join social workers Sue Marriott and Jan Winhall as they explore Winhall’s “felt sense” model, where she blends neuroception and interoception through a polyvagal lens. Jan Winhall is a highly experienced therapist and author who has dedicated her life to understanding and challenging dominant structures. From her years of group therapy and studying with figures like Dr. Stephen Porges, she has combined her findings into her recent book Treating Trauma and Addiction with the Felt Sense Plyvagal Model: A Bottom-Up Approach. “Felt sense is all about the capacity in the body to notice what we’re experiencing and to carry us forward in the direction of healing and growth.” – Jan Winhall About Jan Winhall  Jan Winhall, MSW, FOT is an author, teacher, and psychotherapist. She is an adjunct lecturer in the Department of Social Work at the University of Toronto. She is the director of Focusing on Borden, a psychotherapy and training center. Jan presents internationally on trauma and addiction. You can find many resources for both clinicians and clients on her website, including videos, PDFs (see below) and training opportunities. Time Stamps for the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model  3:47 – Tying the autonomic nervous system to addiction 6:02 – Breaking down bottom-up processing 8:13 – The relationship between interoception and neuroception  14:17 – Rethinking the term “sex addiction” 18:46 – Neuroception temperature example 21:16 – Introducing the intervening variable 27:53 – The six F’s and their branches 36:01 – The learning model of addiction 41:34 – Winhall’s perspective on polyvagal theory Resources for the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model  Treating Addiction & Trauma Together – Youtube Video Trauma and Recovery – Book by Judith Herman Jan Winhall Models 6 F’s client and clinician version Revolutionizing Addiction Treatment with The Felt Sense Polyvagal Model – Article International Body Psychotherapy Journal  Jan Winhall Website  The Conspiracy of Silence – Book by Sandra Butler The Politics of Giving Therapy – Eugene T. Gendlin, Ph.D. Stephen W. Porges, Ph.D. – Website Doug Braun-Harvey, Fellowship in Sexual Compulsive Behavior – Website Focusing on Borden – Jan Winhall             Other Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu18-polyvagal-theory-understanding-irrational-threat-responses-in-relationships/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu93-polyvagal-theory-in-action-the-practice-of-body-regulation-with-dr-stephen-porges/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu94-the-science-of-self-regulation-breaking-down-polyvagal-theory/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/tu110-story-follows-state-investigating-polyvagal-theory-with-guest-deb-dana/ CLICK here for Jan Winhall Transcripts – Episode 192 We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper insights into select content, and unique study opportunities.   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Discipline is about teaching, not punishment.  Children are sponges. They are constantly soaking up information about themselves, their relationships and their future.  And parents are the most powerful influences on these messages, so what we do really matters. Knowing this, sometimes we double down on trying to assert our wisdom, hammer a point home, or stop an unwanted behavior in it’s tracks. After all, we want to raise kids who are kind, responsible, caring, and independent. The trouble is, if we are acting out of fear, being fueled by anger and reactivity, it’s likely we aren’t having the impact we truly desire. For kids to learn, they need to feel emotionally safe and cognitively open. For this to happen, parents need to start by cultivating their own self-awareness and emotion management. In today’s episode, learn powerful strategies for parenting even during the most difficult moments. Ann Kelley, Kat Scherer and Elizabeth Sylvester discuss ways of integrating attachment and neurobiology into disciplinary styles that work and build balance in our relationships. Throughout the episode, Dr. Scherer and Dr. Sylvester highlight some of their most effective parenting strategies discussed in their recent book, Relationship-Based Treatment of Children & Their Parents: An Integrative Guide to Neurobiology, Attachment, Regulation, and Discipline.  Specifically, they dive deep into the “7 Essential Attachment Needs” for children’s optimal development, emphasize the importance of repair in relationships, and discuss the building blocks of secure parenting. “When limits are set firmly, but kindly, this fuels healing in the attachment relationship.”  – Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester Time Stamps for Relationship-based treatment 1:05 – Breaking down the title of their book, “Relationship-Based Treatment of Children & Their Parents” 4:43 – The integration between attachment and discipline 8:52 – Finding balance with a high-intense child 11:31 – Rethinking the way we view dysregulation 16:38 – The 7 essential attachment needs 24:58 – Recognizing the importance of “the repair” 35:47 – Discipline is learning 39:08 – The effects of “fear-based” discipline 45:08 – The role of “novelty and play” 51:49 – The power in empowered parenting Resources for Relationship-based treatment Relationship-Based Treatment – Youtube Channel Website Link – Relationship-Based Treatment The Nurtured Heart Institute – Website for the Nurtured Heart Approach  mindGAINS – Website for the Global Association for Interpersonal Neurobiology Studies Dr. Elizabeth A. Sylvester – Website Dr. Kathy Scherer – Website About Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester & Dr. Kat Scherer Dr. Elizabeth Sylvester is a Psychologist and Educator working with children, parents, and families in Austin Texas for over 30 years. She is a practitioner of the Nurtured Heart Approach ®, and has completed advanced training in this system.  Her specialty is providing parent training and child psychotherapy for children and teens who are highly behaviorally and emotionally intense.  In addition to her clinical work, Dr. Sylvester facilitates training for professionals and the public on parenting, and child and adolescent psychotherapy.  She has a particular focus on the interaction of relationships and neurobiological development with mental health and behavior. She has presented in a variety of settings including universities, professional organizations, mental health agencies, and community organizations. In collaboration with Dr. Kathy Scherer (a founder of Austin IN Connection), she created the Heart & Work series of writings, presentations, and workshops. Dr. Sylvester is a co-founder of Austin Child Therapy, an organization whose mission is to support the work of pediatric mental health professionals in Austin. Kathy (Kat) Scherer, Ph.D., MFT, C-IAYT is a Psychologist, Educator, and Author working in Austin for over 25 years. She is a psychotherapist in private practice and offers presentations on topics such as interpersonal neurobiology, family attachment, social-emotional development, and the application of yoga and meditation for stress management. Her presentations have been offered at a wide variety of settings including universities, professional conferences, community centers, and schools. Dr. Scherer is a co-founder of Austin IN Connection and its Family Matters program, both Austin area multidisciplinary organizations focused on emotional health and positive relational attachments. She co-hosts the Heart & Work Series of writings including two collaborative mental health blogs (with Drs. Holt & Sylvester):  Therapy Matters and Heart & Work of Parenting. Episode Transcripts – 192 – Lightly edited for readability 

The intersection of poverty and mental illness – intergenerational patterns that impact one another. Attachment ‘insecurity” is partly a manifestation of unresolved stress patterns in the child and, by extension, the family. Therapists usually think of stress as interpersonal and dyadic, but you can’t isolate individuals from context. We talk about context a lot when it comes to attachment – the circumstances or setting which helps to understand a process more deeply. As Sharon Lambert says in today’s episode, you can’t “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” if you have no boots. Sue Marriott and Sharon Lambert discuss the unconscious bootstraps communities have that cause blame towards those who are struggling. There is no doubt that poverty impacts physical and emotional health, and thus lifting children out of poverty is a direct intervention in their well-being. Today’s session also explores fascinating research on how people use mental health podcasts – join us! “We still have these perpetuating cycles – it’s not the cycle of addiction, it’s the cycle of trauma. It’s not the cycle of poverty, it’s the cycle of trauma. We have to start looking at systems and asking ‘how do we break these cycles?'” – Dr. Sharon Lambert  Time Stamps for Poverty & Mental Health 1:05 – Poverty is one of the biggest predictors of depression 9:56 – The privilege of higher education 11:51 – Differing views of drug and alcohol use between the classes 22:06 – Cortisol levels of parenting in poverty 25:43 – Being aware of differing trauma responses 32:12 – Explanation of the “child benefit payment” in Ireland 39:18 – The risk, rewards & research of mental health podcasts 46:44 – Mental health podcast recommendations 1:00:58 – Trans community and mental health Resources for  Poverty & Mental Health  Dr. Sharon Lambert – UCC Research Profile & list of Studies Podcasts as a tool for enhancing mental health literacy: An investigation of mental health-related podcasts PDF of 2022 article cited “Her Dislike of the Words ‘Addict’ & ‘Clean'” – Youtube Video “Where the Light Enters” – Youtube Video The Blindboy Podcast – Episode The Two Norries – Podcast Twitter Profile About Dr. Sharon Lambert Dr. Sharon Lambert joined the teaching staff at the School of Applied Psychology in 2014 following a number of years working within community-based settings that provided support to marginalized groups. Sharon’s research interests revolve primarily around the impact of trauma on development, its link with substance dependence and mental health, and consequent considerations for service design and delivery. Sharon conducts research with community-based partners such as addiction, homelessness, criminal justice, and education organizations. The research looks at both primary psychological trauma (Adverse Childhood & Community Experiences) and secondary traumatic stress. The impact of trauma on well-being and outcomes is explored and the application of research and theory to service delivery is of significant interest. Sharon is a member of the Psychological Society of Ireland, Silent Voices Advisory Group and was appointed to the statutory Parole Board by the Minister for Justice. View the Transcripts Here – Dr. Sharon Lambert  We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Navigate more securely no matter where you start. Learn to deepen interpersonal connections, heal trauma and even add enjoyment through secure relating! This podcast gives you truly deep dives into attachment and helpful tools to build comfort with intimacy.  Is it possible to have unresolved trauma and still be operating securely in various relationships? Absolutely!! You don’t have to be totally healed from years of therapy under your belt or a history of secure attachment to develop skills for increased intimacy and secure relating. This is something that anybody, no matter their history, can begin to learn. Channeling your inner awareness to recognize a heightened state of arousal or using visualizations to help stay in a regulated place helps tap into your right brain to connect with yourself and your humanity. Ann and Sue navigate their personal examples, self-regulating tips, breaking out of their defensive “competitive head”, and many more useful strategies to explore the ways we can move in the direction of secure connections. “Even if you have a history that leads you to trend toward preoccupied, dismissive or avoidant relating, with effort and practice opening up you can learn to relate from a secure base.” – Dr. Ann Kelley Time Stamps for Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment  3:06 – Introduction to attachment patterns 8:53 – Acknowledging the fluctuation of the attachment spectrum 11:56 – The definition of secure relating 27:09 – Using visualizations as a regulation tactic 29:01 – Abandoning your “competitive head” 34:13 – Utilizing the word “bookmark” 37:36 – The importance of preparing yourself for tough conversations 40:45 –  Implementing Gottman’s “soft starts” 42:45 – Navigating the coexistence of complex feelings Episode Resources for Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment “How to Fight Smarter: Soften Your Starts” – Gottman Institute Article Other Relevant Therapist Uncensored Episodes https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/whole-brain-living-psychology-neuroanatomy-spirit-with-dr-jill-bolte-taylor-164/ https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/thrive-during-stress-172/ Secure Relating vs Secure Attachment Transcripts  – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – support them to support us! $75 credit alert for our listeners!  Ann and Sue aren’t tech-savvy so they appreciate how easy it is to use and navigate Indeed.  It is the hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Find top talent fast with Indeed’s suite of powerful hiring tools like Instant Match, Assessments, and Virtual Interviews. Hate waiting? Indeed’s US data shows over 80% of Indeed employers find quality candidates, whose resume on Indeed matches their job description, the MOMENT they sponsor a job. Start hiring now with a seventy-five dollar sponsorship credit to post your job post at Indeed.com/therapistuncensored With MasterClass, you can learn from the world’s best minds – anytime, anywhere, and at your own pace. With over 150 classes from a range of world-class instructors, that thing you’ve always wanted to do is closer than you think. Get unlimited access to EVERY class, and as a Therapist Uncensored listener, you get 15% off an annual membership! Go to MasterClass.com/TU now.  Interested in even more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  

Hair-pulling, skin picking, and cheek, lip, & cuticle biting are self-soothing strategies that depending on degree can become body-focused repetitive behavioral disorders. Learn about a new attachment-informed psychodynamic model for treating these painful, shame-associated behaviors. While we may not be fully aware when we are pulling and picking, these sorts of unconscious behaviors can be an indicator of dysregulation. Outside factors such as our environment, upbringing, and various traumas can all play a role in these self-soothing behaviors. Stacy Nakell has been an active researcher and pioneer in this field, and has dedicated years to understanding and educating others on how to abandon shame and treat these behaviors. By blending attachment theory and neurobiological research, Nakell has helped rewire the ways in which we navigate these behaviors and brought forward new perspectives like viewing BFRBDs on a continuum and how these overlap with body dysmorphic disorders. Stacy Nakell’s book Treatment for Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors is the first to establish the theory and practice of a psychodynamic approach to treating body-focused repetitive behavior disorders. Follow along as Sue and Stacy discuss the misconceptions, treatments, and science to better manage these behavioral patterns. Stacy Nakell wants to help us talk about these shame-filled experiences “It’s important to look from an in-depth perspective… to really get into the roots and understand what’s driving the behavior” – Stacy Nakell Time Stamps for Healing BFRBDs  2:02 – Introduction to trichotillomania 7:26 – When these behaviors are considered a “disorder” 9:36 – The role of shame in repetitive behavioral patterns 11:56 – Are BFRBD’s considered self-harm? 13:33 – The overlap with body dysmorphic disorders 17:36 – Correlation between grooming and BFRBDs 21:08 – Perfectionism’s influence on BFRBDS 22:54 – The role of aggression in BFRBDs 31:14 – Metaphor of the stress cup 41:28 – Analysis of “psychic skin” Resources for Healing BFRBDs  Click here to purchase Treatment for Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors Stacy Nakell’s Website Stacy Nakell’s Blog Pop Culture Storyline Reference The TLC Foundation Zoobiguity – Barbara Natterson-Horowitz About Stacy Nakell  Stacy Nakell is a psychotherapist in private practice in Austin, TX. For the past 20 years, she has worked with people who struggle with body-focused repetitive behaviors. Nakell is a Certified Group Psychotherapist and provides workshops and institutes locally with the Austin Group Psychotherapy Society and nationally with the American Group Psychotherapy Association.     We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, and very unique study opportunities.   Sponsors who help make these episodes free and available to all – support them to support us! $75 credit alert for our listeners!  Ann and Sue aren’t tech-savvy so they appreciate how easy it is to use and navigate Indeed.  It is the hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Find top talent fast with Indeed’s suite of powerful hiring tools like Instant Match, Assessments, and Virtual Interviews. Hate waiting? Indeed’s US data shows over 80% of Indeed employers find quality candidates, whose resume on Indeed matches their job description, the MOMENT they sponsor a job. Start hiring now with a seventy-five dollar sponsorship credit to post your job post at Indeed.com/therapistuncensored Dipsea is an app that brings you socially responsible sexy stories made by and for those who identify as women. Women often have sexual trauma on top of hurtful cultural messaging around sexuality, so finding a new product that can safely reconnect you to an important essence of yourself is very positive.  Dipsea promotes sexual and sensual health via imagination in a way that is safe, discreet, and respectful.  Reconnect to parts of you that might have been neglected, find things you didn’t know you were into, or just gain more confidence in the bedroom, whether you have someone with you or not.  Check it out totally free using our link – this gives you a full 30 days to explore what they are all about dipseastories.com/tu or just click HERE.   Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight into interpersonal relationships.  An entirely free way to support us is to simply rate and review the podcast on your favorite podcast player, and/or to simply share this episode with someone you think could use the free resources on the show!  

Do you have intimacy hiccups? Let’s find out. Ann and Sue were on a role w disarming defenses so while this one isn’t technically in that 5 part series, let’s call it a hanger-on. OK, an important question: how you make a tuna sandwich. We are sure your way is awesome but… Unless we think about it contextually, we believe our tuna technique is simply the “right” way.  This is true relationally, so how do we recognize interpersonal assumptions that we’ve never examined when they just seem like they are true and right?  When we make assumptions we literally don’t know we are doing it because it just seems true. While having assumptions can sometimes be considered a way to keep us safe, they also can be a strong influence on our “intimacy hiccups”. Assumptions block our view of seeing the whole perspective and equip us with a bias that can make our relationships difficult to navigate. Receiving feedback could become an assumption that you’re under attack or not worthy, and can heighten our defenses. Whether your “moral compass” may get in the way, your assumptions form from cultural influence, or you even feel avoidant of those tougher conversations and just assume the other person is on the same page – no matter which defense resonates with you, this episode will probably hit on something relevant for you. Ann and Sue challenge you to just reconsider so you can relate in the most mindful way possible and not accidentally project your way as the “right” way. “When you apologize… you’re not actually above or below the other person – you’re equal to the person. That’s what being truly empowered is, and that’s the assumption that we’re busting.” – Ann Kelley Time Stamps for Busting Assumptions – Episode 188 3:30 – Navigating “intimacy hiccups” 9:03 – The importance of dropping ego during feedback 10:10 – Healthy relating example in parenting 16:36 – Softening your front to allow uncertainty 19:34 – Roles of cultural differences in assumptions 25:42 – The power in knowing how & when to apologize CLICK HERE FOR BUSTING ASSUMPTIONS TRANSCRIPTS – Episode 188  – Lightly edited for readability We have pledged 50% of all corporate profits & merch sales to organizations that support mental health access to those traditionally left out of mainstream healthcare.  We can only do that with the help of our Patrons. Please join us today! By joining as a Patron premium subscriber, you get a dedicated ad-free feed, deeper dives into select content, extra episodes, and very unique study opportunities Good sleep is related to so many good health and mental health outcomes, but we don’t all have it easy when we try to fall asleep or stay asleep.  Nighttime rituals are important, try a cup of hot cocoa before bed that tastes good and is full of wellness ingredients that will help you sleep.  Beam includes 3rd party tested hemp free of THC, l-theanine, melatonin, and natural adaptogens to help your immunity. Get up to 40% off when you go to shopbeam.com/TU and use code TU at checkout.    Interested in more content? Check out our full episodes and other bonus clips from the show on our Youtube Channel. Please like, comment & subscribe! Thanks for stopping by, we hope the podcast (and these show notes) offer quality education and insight about interpersonal relating.