Belonging: Conversations about rites of passage, meaningful community, and seasonal living

In today’s episode, I am joined by Becca Rich - a trauma-sensitive, certified holistic coach with a background in engineering and mindfulness, who teaches Holistic Time Management. In today’s episode, she shares with us her wisdom on the meaning of time, the role of control, how we can honor the cyclical nature of our bodies within our digital calendars and so much more. She also coaches me on the part that grief plays in experiencing loss of time and freedom, especially with having a child.Tune in to hear more from us on:The perspective on time that it is everything and that it is short but it is longTime anxiety and feelings of grief at the loss of time freedom with having childrenFinding satisfaction at the end of the day and embracing a digital calendar liberation practiceHow to deal with overcommitment and overwhelmThe importance of respecting our natural cycles and working with our bodies, minds, and spirits instead of forcing them into a rigid structureResources + LinksBecca Rich’s podcast Not Too Productive + website TheHolisticTimeCoach.com + Instagram @theholistictimecoachBecca’s Course: Digital Calendars for HumansBlogpost: A practical guide to applying your human design type to your scheduleBlogpost: Top 10 ADHD Time Management ToolsStephanie Burg’s episode on the Belonging Podcast #21 ‘Opting out of Linear Time’ and the book It’s About Time by Leslie KeenanNick North’s Instagram @wethenorthsMy book, Root and Ritual: Timeless Ways to Connect to Land, Lineage, Community, and the SelfConnect with me on Instagram @beccapiastrelliTimestamps[00:00] Introducing Becca Rich and her work[07:40] Understanding & shifting our relationship with the concept of time[11:54] Navigating time in different life seasons[19:08] Finding satisfaction at the end of the day[20:50] Chasing productivity and overcoming disappointment[28:48] Embracing a digital calendar liberation practice[35:44] Creating a weekly template[37:45] Calibrating the calendar with menstrual cycle[42:45] Dealing with overcommitment and overwhelm[44:55] Respecting the cycle[45:53] Different Levels of time privilege[46:23] Divesting from productivity hustle culture[47:10] Healing ancestral stories for the future[49:37] Life is short, but life is also long[50:00] The spiritual component of time[50:19] The simplicity of taking a breath

A lot has occurred for me in 2023 - as I think is true for every year, but perhaps this time around it is a little more visible and this is probably why I received the beautiful question of the lessons I’ve learned this past year. So, I am using the reflective energy of the outer and inner season of Winter I’m currently finding myself in and sharing with you, in this episode, the three lessons I have learned over the course of 2023.Tune in to hear more from me on the three lessons I’ve learned this past year:I can do anything, but I can’t do everything. As a multi-passionate manifesting generator with ADHD, I get lit up and motivated by so many new ideas. But how do you navigate that with limited capacity, in a society that glorifies production? A few of my coping strategies are compartmentalizing, sleeping on new ideas, and exploring how I can feel accomplished and satiated by what I do day in day out whilst also taking care of myself.The vision takes time. More time than you think! It’s not for nothing I teach about how slowness can be the antidote to our suffering. I have so much compassion for the me who gets uncomfortable in the liminal, especially around our renovation. I ask myself: ‘Can I make this messy middle feel easeful in some way?’, which is where ritual comes in.Get slow and quiet so I can get clear on my highest priorities. Last year I had the deep realisation that my biggest priority wasn’t my business, or the farm or the renovation. It was my first home: my body, and my health. Even though it was really hard, I learned how to choose to make it my focus to take care of my body on a weekly and daily basis.Resources + LinksMy book, Root and Ritual: Timeless Ways to Connect to Land, Lineage, Community, and the SelfConnect with me on Instagram @beccapiastrelliTimestamps[00:00] Introducing the question of what lessons I’ve learned over the past year[5:00] How a deer carcass is showing me the real deal of somatic embodiment of the wild experience and the winter medicine in that[07:30] The analogy of the ascending spiral and revisiting inner work when I’m well resourced[08:30] Lesson 1: I can do anything, but I can't do everything[11:00] I have a much more limited capacity since I had my child and the pandemic[18:58] Lesson 2: The big vision takes time[24:00] How nature is teaching me to be patient with our renovation[25:41] Lesson 3:  Get slow and quiet so I can get clear on my highest priorities[30:15] The impact of celebrating my health wins

In today’s episode, our guest, Hillarie Maddox, interviews me (Becca) to get some personal updates on the journey of rewilding and all that unfolds when we take the steps that brought us from the dream to buying and living on our land. I open up to vulnerably reveal some of the grief, the questioning and the spiral of regret that happened when we initially landed on the farm and how we had to really speak the dream alive again each night so that we could move through that resistance. Both Hillarie and I share the trials and triumphs that our rewilding journeys have brought us thus far and the importance of holding a steadfast dedication to the tending of community along the way.Tune in to hear more from me on:The deep truths and feelings that surfaced as a result of our move to the farmWhat rewilding can really feel likeLoneliness and grief along the journeyCultivating community in a rural areaChallenges and obstacles that we’ve overcomeLearnings and advice to take if you’re moving through a similar transitionRESOURCES + LINKS:Hillarie other Belonging episode: Slow Homesteading & Land StewardshipHillarie’s podcast: Black Girl Country LivingFollow Hillarie on instagram: @blackgirl.countrylivingFollow Becca on Instagram @beccapiastrelliBecca’s book, Root and Ritual: Timeless Ways to Connect to Land, Lineage, Community, and the Selfhttps://www.amazon.com/Root-Ritual-Timeless-Connect-Community/dp/1683647726TIMESTAMPS[0:00] Becca introduces today’s guest (Hillarie Maddox) who will be interviewing Becca for today’s special episode.[1:40] Hillarie shares her excitements for having this rewilding, homesteading and community building conversation.[2:55] Hillarie shares her own rewilding story (departing the city with her family to answer the call for rural homesteading) [5:40] Becca touches on living in the dream state (the fresh eggs, the farm, the connection to the land) and how that blends with the reality of the pace of modern times and how we attempt recalibration. [7:15] Becca shares the details of transition from past life (California) to Hudson Valley, NY. [15:10] “What was it really like landing in your dream?” Becca gets real about the experience of arriving on the farm after making the move from California. [24:13] The shifts in community and connection and what Becca has noticed about relationships in her more rural area. [29:13] What felt hard for Hillarie during her phased move from the city to her homestead.[32:10] Mindset shifts and learnings from the physical labor, handwork and the embodiment that comes with homesteading.[41:50] How Becca is finding her people at the right time.[48:20] Trusting ourselves and learning skills that solve problems and sustain the land and our home.[52:28] Slowing down to really listen and deepen connections in the community[54:10] Observance, presence and how this is foundational in rewilding[55:20] Closing and conclusion with an invitation for continued connection

In today’s episode, I give you updates from my new life on the farm (here in Hudson Valley, New York) and share both the challenges and joys of renovating an old house. I share the resources and learnings I have gathered in creating and tending community from the perspective of someone who has just moved to a new place. Tune in to hear more from me on: - Living on a farm and renovating an old farmhouse - Why community is an important value and a vital need - How transitions in life, such as becoming a parent, can lead to a deeper understanding of the leaderships that calls to us - How creating community in a new place requires consistent effort and prioritizing low-pressure, low-stakes interactions - How challenges and moments of rejection can be overcome by resourcing oneself and seeking support Resources + Links -Sarah Wildeman @ Our Common -My book, Root and Ritual: Timeless Ways to Connect to Land, Lineage, Community, and the Self -Connect with me on Instagram @beccapiastrelli Timestamps [0:00] Welcome back to the podcast [4:22] Life updates and the joys & challenges of farm life and living in our caretaker cottage during renovations[9:03] How I am starting over in community creation (and why it's a big priority for me) [12:17] The deep desire for leadership and community tending that emerges in becoming a parent and in becoming a mother [13:17] Yearnings for council, sacred connection and co-regulation, a pull to circle (yes, even amidst the busyness)[14:24] Cultivating connection and community in the age of loneliness (in a culture that tells us it's not possible)[16:27] How to create and go forth in creating community in a new place [19:22] Overcoming the resistance and the challenges in community creation and trusting that we are resourced and supported [20:21] Where to continue this connection together 

Sweet podcast listeners, I’ve been missing you. I’m not quite ready to be back on the mic yet but wanted to drop in here with a little update from my life (moving across the country is a whole thing) and an opportunity to work with me this autumn if you’ve been curious about holding a circle in your community. The link to join us is beccapiastrelli.com/circle-craft

Summer feels like a ripe tomato — the peak fullness of the season where so much is revealed as the light of the sun shines down on us all.In this episode, I complete my series of ancestral rituals for each season, with reflections on summer.I share why summer is a season of work and rest, how this time teaches us the lessons of the Mother, ways to honor our inner wild creatures, and the power of garden time.I also offer ideas for summer rituals, including my favorite herbal tinctures, fire practices, and embodiment practices for the season.ResourcesJoin me for Threshold sessionsExplore the other seasonal ritual episodes— Belonging Episode #92: Winter Rituals & PracticesBelonging Episode #92: Slow Emergence from Winter into Ancestral Rituals for SpringBelonging Episode #106: Autumn is the Season for AncestorsLearn more about rites of passage & transitional times—Episode #90: Rites of Passage for All of UsNorth Sea Medicine Collective

If you’re curious about what village life is like beyond the picture-perfect cottage-core images on Instagram, today’s conversation is for you.In this episode, Sarah Wildeman and I delve into a topic near and dear to my heart — revillaging and community-centered living.Sarah is a leadership & relationship dynamics coach, community-builder, and founder of Our Common — a coaching and consulting practice serving community seekers, community builders, and existing communities.Together, we discuss her experiences with intentional communal living and the many forms in which community can take shape. She also shares her whole-systems approach to relationships—in her family, communities, and workplace— and we have a vulnerable conversation about how to address conflict.More from SarahFollow Sarah on InstagramFollow Our Common on InstagramLearn More + Explore Coaching with Our Common

Living in capitalism while not being consumed by it can feel overwhelming and confusing.Today, I’m joined by Bear Hebert (they/them), a feminist and anti-capitalist business coach who helps small business people (and other beloved weirdos) figure out how to build the world-yet-to-come inside the world-that-currently-is.Together, we discuss making space for grieving our own and others’ participation in capitalism, the ways we internalize capitalism and exploit ourselves in our own businesses, and how white supremacy’s penchant for perfectionism plays a big role in it all.More from Bear HebertVisit Bear’s WebsiteFollow Bear on InstagramPurchase Bear’s class FREELY: An Anti-Capitalist Guide To Pricing Your WorkResourcesTema Okun’s White Supremacy CultureDr. Susan Woodhouse’s Secure Base Provision StudySilvia Federici’s Witches, Witch-Hunting, and Women

If you want more powerful, matriarchal-inspired, healing community in your life, this episode is for you.I’ve been circling for over a decade, but it’s been a while since I’ve talked about the practice of Circle on the podcast. So in this episode, I share what it means to practice Circle — including what it is, how it works, some challenging but important historical context, and how it has shaped my own life.I truly believe that Circling has the power to connect us to each other, heal centuries-old wounds, help us restructure our hierarchical thinking, and affect long-term sustainable change in the world. Join me to circle up and go deeper.ResourcesJoin my free workshop on Weds, April 12th — The Art of Circle Invitation: How to find your people and call them inCultish by Amanda MontellDevoted Way with Sora SchillingCaliban and the Witch by Sylvia FedericiThe Spiral Dance by StarhawkLiz Migliorelli of sister spinsterThe Millionth Circle by Jean Shinoda BolenThe Hundredth Monkey story

If you daydream about purchasing land and relocating to a tiny town far from city life, this episode is the gentle invitation and reality-check you need before taking the leap.Today I’m joined by Alissa Hessler, an author, podcast host, and former corporate tech employee who left the big city to move to a rural community for love.In this episode, we discuss common reasons people choose to leave cities, the importance of being as prepared as possible before moving, and some things to expect if you’re thinking of relocating.We also unpack how the idealized country life we see on Instagram is actually damaging rural communities. And we emphasize the importance of seeking out the communities we enter (even when it feels uncomfortable) and honoring the histories of the lands we inhabit.More from Alissa HesslerListen to the Urban Exodus PodcastRead Ditch the City, Go CountryVisit the Urban Exodus WebsiteFollow Urban Exodus on InstagramResourcesEpisode #110: Slow Homesteading & Land Stewardship with Hillarie Maddox