Girls Night with Stephanie May Wilson

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!Friends, I can’t believe it, but today is our last episode of Season 15! To wrap up this season, we’re talking about a really important topic and that’s how to deal with mean girls and friend drama as an adult. I wanted to have this conversation because I’m such a believer that as friends, we can be the best thing to happen to each other. In so many ways, I am who I am because of the incredible women in my life. Their guidance, and love, and presence in my life has changed everything for the better. But I’ve also experienced the opposite in friendship. The negative experiences I’ve had with female friendship have broken my heart and scarred me more deeply than any other relationship in my life. In fact, if I could go back and give my younger self one piece of advice, I’d tell her that you don’t have to be friends with people who are mean to you. But that’s so much easier said than done, even as an adult, and that’s why I’m excited for this conversation.To talk us through this, I invited my wonderful and brilliant friend, Danielle Bayard Jackson, back on the show. Danielle is a certified friendship coach and a national speaker who works to teach women how to create and maintain better female friendships.Y’all, Danielle has so much great advice on this topic. If you’re dealing with friend drama, mean girls, or friendship hurt — this episode is for you. This conversation would have been life-changing for me if I would have had it just a few years ago, and that's why I’m so happy to get to share it with you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today we’re talking about how to see your value and ask for what you want (in both work and relationships!).Our guest for today’s episode is my new friend Mori Taheripour. Mori is a speaker, educator, negotiation expert and teaches Negotiation and Dispute Resolution at the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. She has a new book called, Bring Yourself: How to Harness the Power of Connection to Negotiate Fearlessly, and when I first came across it, I immediately began to wonder how the things she teaches in it could help us in our relationships — specifically in these three really vulnerable areas of life where we have to put ourselves out there and ask for what we want in order to be successful: dating, friendships, and our careers. And that’s what we’re talking about in this episode. Friends, if you’ve been struggling to see your value and need practical tips on how to ask for what you want with confidence, then you’re in the right place!She is brilliant. I can’t wait for you to meet her. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today we’re talking about the Enneagram and how it can help us grow in our relationships. I shared about the Enneagram way back in episode number seventeen of the podcast and chances are you’ve heard about the Enneagram before, but if you’re not super familiar or need a refresher, it’s a personality assessment that helps you understand your emotions and motivations at a deeper level. The way I have come to understand it, it’s designed to do two things:1. It helps us get to know our minds and our hearts so much better2. It helps us overcome some of the roadblocks in our lives and become the best versions of ourselves It also helps us understand and connect with the people we love, whether that’s a friend or our family, our coworkers or our spouse. And that’s the focus of today’s episode. Because, if you’re anything like me, you want to connect with the people around you on a deeper level, but you don’t always know how to make that happen in a practical way. You might also find yourself disagreeing or feeling disconnected in certain ways and not knowing how to fix it. But adding the Enneagram to my relationship toolbox has been a game changer and I hope it will be for you too! To talk us through this, I invited my sweet friend, Meredith Boggs, on the show. Meredith is an expert when it comes to the Enneagram and has a new book coming out soon called, The Journey Home; A Biblical Guide to Using the Enneagram to Deepen Your Faith and Relationships.In this episode she’s going to teach us: What the Enneagram is (and what it’s not!) An overview of the Enneagram types and how to discover what type we are How the Enneagram can help us communicate in our relationships How the Enneagram can help us in our faith  How the Enneagram can help us understand and connect with our significant others better And that’s just the beginning!  If you’ve been wanting to cultivate deeper, healthier, more meaningful relationships, the Enneagram is a great resource to try and I can’t wait to share more about it! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!So, I was at an event recently when someone asked me what Girls Night is all about. I told them that here on the show we talk about anything and everything that you’d actually talk about with your real life best friends at a real life girls night. That pretty much covers it, right? Well, one of the things my friends and I spend a lot of time talking about is where we’ll live. Where we live is a big deal — our homes are where our lives happen. Our cities are where our people are. And so making decisions about where we want to be located and what kind of house we want to live in — those are really important things to talk about! And because so much rides on this decision from finances to family to lifestyle, I’m so glad we had our friends to help us walk through it.As many of you know, one of my closest friends here in Nashville is Hanna Seymour. Hanna’s been on Girls Night a bunch of times, and she’s actually the one who connected us with her amazing Realtor, Cindy Easley — who also happens to be Hanna’s mom. Cindy has walked Carl and I through the process of buying and selling our home a few times now, and I am SO grateful for her. Buying a home can feel really scary, but it’s been so much easier and less intimidating to have my friends, and one of friends’ amazing mom to walk me through it.And that’s why I cannot wait to share today’s episode with you! We’re talking about how to buy a home for the first time and how to make it less intimidating! In this episode Cindy is going to teach us…How to figure out if we’re personally ready to buy a home and what to consider when starting that processHow to figure out the financial part of buying a home — she’ll walk us through things like down payments, mortgages, credit scores, and loans.How to find a real estate agent and lender that you trust How to figure out your must-haves for a home – what’s realistic and where we might need to compromise a littleAnd so much more! Friends, if you’re trying to figure out your living situation right now, this episode is for you. I can’t wait for you to meet Cindy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!I’m so excited for today’s episode. Today we’re talking about boundaries: How to set them, how to keep them, and why they’re so truly life-changing. If you’ve been a Girls Night listener for a while now, this isn’t the first time you’re hearing me talk about boundaries. And it’s because this has been a HUGE lesson for me.I am historically bad at knowing what I want and what I need — at drawing lines and saying no.And for the longest time, I was okay with that. (Maybe even a little bit proud of it?)I like being helpful. I like being needed. I like feeling useful, and capable, and strong.For years I thought that this was the best way to love the people I love: To always put their needs above my needs, to say yes to everything, to give but never take, and to have everything that’s mine be theirs without limit — whether it was my stuff, my space, my time, or my energy. This is what I thought would lead to the healthiest, closest relationships. But over the last few years I’ve learned that the opposite is true.Boundaries are an absolutely essential part of healthy relationships. They’re an essential part of a healthy life, of a healthy US.And that’s what we’re talking about here today. To help us through this, I invited my dear friend, Dr. Sasha Shillcutt back on the show. Sasha is a renowned cardiac anesthesiologist, professor, bestselling author and CEO and Founder of Brave Enough. Sasha is also a wife and a mother who has walked through seasons of loneliness, anxiety, and complete burnout. Needless to say, she has had to learn about boundaries the HARD way. She has a new book called, Brave Boundaries: Strategies to Say No, Stand Strong and Take Control of Your Time where she helps us find the courage to implement boundaries in our own life. Here are just a few of the things she’s going to teach us in this episode: How to take a personal boundary inventory and identify what boundaries we needWhy saying no to others and yes to ourselves isn’t selfish and can actually help us be a better version of ourselves (and love our people better!)How to kindly respond to someone if we receive backlash for the boundary we’ve setAnd so much more! One of my favorite things that Sasha says in the episode was, "The world will set your boundaries if you don't set them for yourself” and that couldn't be more true. Friends, if you’re feeling anxious, burned out, or overwhelmed in life right now, this episode is for you!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today we’re talking about how to have more fun and why fun is so important. Let’s be honest: being an adult is hard. There’s so much to navigate, so much to balance, so much to figure out. We’re figuring out work, and bills, and health insurance, and our living situations. For so many of us, we wake up FAR earlier than we want to, work all day at school or at our offices, eat lunch at our desk, and then come home at the end of the day feeling totally and thoroughly spent.The things we’re doing are good, and important, and necessary. But as we’re making time for all these important things, we also need to make sure we’re having some fun.Our guest for today’s episode is my new friend, Annie F. Downs. Annie is an amazing Author, Podcaster, and Speaker. She has a new devotional book called, Chase the Fun: 100 days to discover fun right where you are. And that’s exactly what we’re talking about in today’s episode!We’re talking about: Why having fun matters (it actually matters — for our brains, and our bodies, and Annie and I both agree that fun is an important spiritual practice!) How to figure out what sounds fun to us and how to actually do those thingsPractical ways to make more time for fun (even with super busy schedules!) How to embrace the things we find to be fun (even if those things aren’t necessarily cool)How to start a new hobbyAnd so much more!Friends, if you’ve been itching to add more fun and joy into your life, but don’t know where to start, this episode is for you!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls’ Night!I don’t think I’m telling you anything new when I say that there have been a lot of hard things happening in our country and in our world recently. It seems like bad news hits us and before we can even take a breath or process what just happened, it hits us again. And if I’m honest, this has been weighing really really heavily on my mind and my heart lately. It’s something my family and friends and I have all been talking about a lot — we’ve all just been feeling heavy, and tired, and at times even a little bit hopeless about the state of things. (Side note: If you’re wondering what I’m referring to, I don’t have a specific event in mind from this week’s headlines. I’m actually recording this two weeks in advance — so I have no clue what’s happening in the news on the day this comes out. But so much has happened in the last few months and last few years, I’m just feeling the weight of it overall.)And I figured that if I’m feeling this way, and my friends and family are feeling this way, that you might be feeling this way too. And that’s why I’m excited about today’s episode. When I’m trying to process bad news in the world, I always find myself thinking back to one of our Girls Night episodes. It’s the conversation I had with Danielle Coke back in Season 13 of the podcast. Dani has a way of taking really important, really complex issues and making them more digestible and helping us figure out what to do with them. And so today I’m actually going to be re-sharing the conversation I had with her, because I have a feeling we could all use these reminders today. Here are just a few of the things I ask Dani in this episode:When the whole world feels like one big ball of bad news, how do we process this? How do we care about the people who are hurting in the world without getting so overwhelmed by the hurt in the world that we just shut down? How do we identify the cause or mission that is our thing? How do we figure out where and how we can help and actually make a difference?Once we figure out what our mission is, what do we do with everything else? When something crazy or hard or heartbreaking happens in the world, how do we process it? How do we both care and help without losing focus on the thing that is our thing? How do you figure out what to say, when you should speak out, and how to do it? And I asked her about how to get through the fear that you’re going to say the wrong thing. (Does anyone else have that fear? Is that just me?) Friends, if you’re feeling discouraged by all of the bad news or tragic events happening in our world, I’m right there with you, but there is hope! This episode is seriously life-giving and has practical advice on how we can process our feelings and make a difference in our world and community today!I can’t wait to share it with you.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls Night!I’m so excited about today’s episode. Today you’ll be hearing part two of my conversation with my amazing therapist, Christen Reed, from Ready Nest Counseling in Nashville! If you haven’t listened to the part one episode, make sure you go back and listen to that one first.In this two-part episode, we’re talking about becoming a mom — why it’s such a big transition, what you can do to prepare for it, and some really practical pieces of advice and wisdom to help you through it. (Especially in those first few months).Like I said, if you didn’t listen to part one, go back and listen to that part first. But today in part two, we’re focusing on:How to ask for help as a new mom — and why needing help is NOT a sign of failure or weakness or a sign that we’re somehow a bad momWhy it’s so important for us to take care of ourselves, how to actually do that, and how to drop the guilt so many of us feel when we doHow to filter through all of the advice that’s out there for first time moms, so we can figure out what’s best for us, our family, and our new babyAnd moreAnd then at the end of the episode, since Christen is my therapist, we talk about therapy — why it’s so important, how it can help, and how to find the right therapist for you (even if you’ve struggled to find someone who is a good fit in the past!).I said this last week, but this is a pretty vulnerable topic for me. Becoming a mom is by far the hardest transition I’ve ever been through. But I wanted to share the whole story of how this went for me, because if you’re struggling in the same ways I was, it’s so important to me that you know you’re not alone.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls Night!Our guest for today’s episode is Christen Reed. Christen works as a licensed marriage and family therapist at Ready Nest Counseling here in Nashville. And not only is she an amazing therapist, she’s MY therapist. Christen has been there with me every step of the way as I’ve gone through the most gigantic transition of my entire life — becoming a mom. And that’s what we’re talking about today. We’re talking about becoming a mom — why it’s such a big transition, what you can do to prepare for it, and some really practical pieces of advice and wisdom to help you through it. (Especially in those first few months).Now, I have a few disclaimers to share with you before we dive in: First: I mentioned this last week, but it is a tad unconventional for you to be meeting my therapist. (She and I had tons of talks and signed lots of papers having to do with boundaries and confidentiality and making sure that we keep our therapist/client relationship as safe and sacred as it’s always been!) So I just wanted to let y’all know that.Second: I wanted to let you know that this is a pretty messy, vulnerable topic for me. In this episode, you’ll hear why I had such a hard time in the first few months of being a mom — why I say that it’s the hardest transition I’ve ever gone through. And the reason I want to be so honest about this is not to be discouraging (that’s the LAST thing I would want to be), but it’s because I don’t ever want you to have to go through any of this alone.I was actually talking to my sister about this a few weeks ago.Maybe your first few months of mom life won’t be that hard, and if that’s the case, AMAZING! I’m so so happy for you.But if this is really hard for you — I want you to know that you’re not alone in that. You’re not weak, you’re not a bad mom. This is hard. And you’re not alone in feeling that way. One last thing I wanted to say: Christen and I had so much to talk about in this episode that we actually had to split it into two parts. But trust me, it’s so worth it. So today you’ll be hearing part one of our conversation, and next week we’ll air part two.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey friends! Welcome to Girls Night!A few summers ago — the summer of 2018, to be exact — was one of the toughest, darkest, saddest, most difficult times of my whole entire life. I found myself in an absolute tailspin of anxiety and depression.And as the anniversary of this season rolls around each year, I always find myself remembering with striking clarity how it all felt. As the weather grows warmer and summer sets in, I always feel a fresh wave of gratitude for the fact that I'm not stuck in that dark place anymore. And I tear up every single time I think of the women who carried me through it.Our guest for today’s episode is my former therapist — the one who walked me through that dark season in 2018 and so much more — Blake Blankenbecler. And today I’ve invited her on the show to talk about people-pleasing.People-pleasing and how to set boundaries are things she and I talked about a LOT during the years I was seeing her. And I cannot even begin to tell you how much freedom I was able to step into as a result.Friends, if you’re a people-pleaser, if you have a hard time saying no, feel guilty for setting boundaries, worry constantly about how other people are perceiving you, and often feel resentful because you feel so depleted from it all — this episode is for you. (Quick disclaimer here: Confidentiality is something that is taken really seriously when it comes to counseling and therapy. And so it’s pretty unconventional for me to be introducing you to my counselors — both former and current — and for us to be sharing some of what we’ve talked about in our sessions. I just wanted to let you know that we’ve had all of the conversations and signed all the necessary paperwork when it comes to the ethics of having them on the show — especially with my current therapist who you’ll meet next week — we’ve done all the work to make sure to protect my privacy, the work we’ve done together, and the integrity of our therapeutic relationship. Just wanted to make sure to say that.) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices