“It’s not my fault he’s like in love with me or something!” - John to Sofia after he made out with her boyfriendYES SLOOTS…Our king is BACK. 53 episodes later John Like the Bible has returned from war…and by war we mean the one he recently conquered with “Lisa”, Bitcoin, and the metaverse. More on that later. This week Sofia brings us up to date on ALL things John including his ~thriving~ love life, career, AND skateboarding skills. Promise it’s FAR more interesting than it sounds. The duo also dives into some interesting topics such as the “gay best friend” controversy, AND a fun game of “What Kind of Gay Are You?” (PS: If you’re a Lana gay we are JUDGING you - kidding…kinda). Finally, instead of Raya, John has a NEW dating app (website?) for us that is by far the WILDEST shit we have ever stumbled across. Just know going forward: no Macy’s bathroom is safe. Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Dipsea: http://www.dipsea.com/SOFIA for 30 days full accessFreshly: http://www.freshly.com/SOFIA Dadgrass: http://www.dadgrass.com/SOFIA To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get in Sloots, we’re self-acceptingSloots, we are FINALLY getting Sofia to ourselves again this week. So you know what that means: clear your schedule for your weekly dose of debauchery and shenanigans. In the past 7 days, Sofia has managed to embarrass herself in front of the ENTIRE West Village impersonating Neil Armstrong AND was (almost) forcefully removed from her apartment building. Some may call it trouble in paradise, we just call it another day in the office. More importantly, for today's Sloot University we talk about a VERY necessary concept: FUCK SELF-HELP. Yes, you read that right. Throw out the books, unfollow that matcha-drinking, journaling girl on Tik-Tok, and PLEASE do not blow your paycheck at Sephora in the name of “retail therapy”. It’s NOT worth it. The real “self-improvement” begins when you SELF-ACCEPT, not when you throw out all your club clothes in place of the Lululemon BBL jacket. Think about it Sloots, actually don’t think - listen to this episode.Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Download Switchcraft for free and unlock the magical mystery! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

WE JUST WANNA DO CRAZY SHIT AND SEE WHAT HAPPENSDrum roll please…Our favorite Sloot-by-association has returned for a SURPRISE back-to-back episode! Sofia is joined by Stella Barey aka The Anal Princess yet again for an even WILDER episode than last. This week Sofia asks Stella for all ALL of the dirty details regarding well…EVERYTHING your dirty mind can think of. When we say this week is DIRTY, it’s a fucking understatement. Prepare to have your mind blown with the different tips, tricks, and kinks you probably haven’t even heard of yet…and TBH, some you may never want to hear again after this episode. Gynecologist and daddy daughter kinks, golden showers, and even scat play (don’t look it up) - Sloots, we cover it ALL. Together the girls also discuss their relationships with their parents and their jobs since they MAY be considered “less than admirable” by society, AND how you can learn how to orgasm EIGHT times in a row (good luck walking afterwards though). Finally, Stella leaves us with a story about an exclusive topless LA hotel where she left with multiple orgasms, AND gummy bears up her asshole. If we never had to give you a parental advisory before, this is the episode that needs it. Put your headphones in because you may be kicked out if they hear this. Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Bloom Nu: http://www.bloomnu.com/SOFIA for 15% off your purchase today!Green Chef: http://www.greenchef.com/SOFIA130Fit On: Text SOFIA to 64-000 to join FitOn for FREE! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I think I just fell in love with a porn star…turn the camera on, she a born star!SLOOTS, gather around, we have a VERY special guest this week! Today Sofia is joined by Stella Barely aka The Anal Princess. Stella is a top 0.01% creator on Only Fans, a VIRAL sensation on Tik Tok, and a TRUE Sloot. Together the ladies cover A LOT of questionable but expected topics such as: narcissistic fathers, fucking men from homeless shelters, LA’s members only sex parties, and the realization of how many true geniuses work in the porn industry. Next, Stella lets us in on her upbringing by telling us about her history at NYU and UCLA, and about the time her dad bribed her with an unlimited AMEX card so she wouldn’t tell her mom he was cheating. Of course, we get to the good stuff as well. Like her namesake, Stella tells us about her FIRST anal experience and also gives us tips on how we can accept back door deliveries MUCH easier. Lastly, Sofia and Stella discuss making at home videos and how the hottest nude is the one we probably hate the most…raw and uncut. That goes for dicks we prefer too. Get comfy Sloots, there’s A LOT to take in here - and you never know, you may be hearing from The Anal Princess again VERY soon. Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Merit: http://www.meritbeauty.com/SOFIA to get their free reusable makeup bag with your purchaseDipsea: http://www.dipsea.com/SOFIA for 30 days full accessFlex: http://www.flexfits.com/SOFIA To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADEEE OFYES! You heard it right! Sofia is BACK in the city so nice they named it twice…NEW YORK…NEW YORKKK *Frank Sinatra voice* This is a BIG deal…because well, IFYKYK. She barely made it there - but if she can make it there, she can make it anywhere, right? Okay we’re done with corny references, just had to get it out the system. This episode is an EXCITING one. Tune in to hear Sofia take you along her first few days back in New York City. Listen as she takes you through her luxurious new building, and the not-so-luxurious maggots she brought with her (a very traumatic experience for all parties involved). Next, Sofia lets us in on some ground breaking technological advances that literally EVERYONE else in the world knew about besides her. And in true Sofia fashion, the way she learned about this technology was NOTHING short of chaotic. You know how at 3 AM you think back to that REALLY embarrassing thing you did in 2012 and want to die? This is definitely gonna be one of those for Sofia. Finally, we have a not-so-appropriate Sloot University lesson on one of TikTok’s favorite buzzwords: LOVE BOMBING. We know the signs, we know how this is gonna end…but can we have some fun? Like is it THAT bad to be told that you’re someone's sun moon and stars only 36 hours after meeting them? Probably…but let’s use it to our advantage Sloots. Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Ship Station: http://www.shipstation.com/SOFIA Zola: http://www.Zola.com/Download Switchcraft for free and unlock the magical mystery!Ro Derm: http://www.roderm.com/SOFIA To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For a final farewell episode from the Utah home base, Sofia is joined by the people who know her best…Mother and Brother Sloot! Shockingly, all parties were able to make it through this recording with MINIMAL tears shed. Though this episode had every intention of being sentimental, leave it to Sofia’s family to make it fucking CHAOTIC. Together, Drapers Finest discusses Lola’s newfound mental clarity (thanks to a witch doctor?), Sofia’s fugitive status and how it’s actively ruining her life, and the MANY times Lola’s children have nearly sent her into cardiac arrest. We also felt it would be a good exercise for Sofia’s family to go through the men she’s dated and give their HONEST opinion…and to answer what you’re already thinking: YES, we talk about him too. SO much is covered in this episode like Lola’s nudes and Lucas’ take on modern maternity wear? A lot is going on, so gather round Sloots, we’re having a family dinner tonight. Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Bloom Nu: http://www.bloomnu.com/SOFIA for 15% off your purchase today! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It isn’t sex…it’s the next best thing!Sleep-fucking, scamming, and sexting oh my! We cover A LOT this week, so buckle tf up Sloots. This week Sofia had A LOT to say…per usual. Have you ever woken up next to a male creature before and felt *something* poking you ever so slightly in the bum? Us too…well Sofia had a revelation about that this week which may make you hate your significant other. Sorry. Next, we discuss the man, the myth, the legend, Simon Leviev aka THE TINDER SWINDLER (PS…PLEASE check your DM’s sir, we are ready and willing). Sofia discusses her opinion on the swindler and the swindled and that one time she paid a guys phone bill (extremely embarrassing please respect our privacy at this time. Finally, we have a very necessary Sloot University on one of America’s favorite past times…SEXTING! We give you the ins and outs, ways to spice up the most bland sext, AND if you’re as lazy as Sofia, a generated sext-bot that can come up with some spicy things for you on the spot. If you’re listening to this with virgin ears around you, turn this shit UP because it’s time for them to learn a thang or two (if they’re above 18 of course!)Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ OK Cupid: Download OK Cupid from the App Store or Google Play today!Dipsea: http://www.dipsea.com/SOFIA for 30 days full accessDadgrass: http://www.dadgrass.com/SOFIA for 20% off your first order To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Runaway fast as youuuu can…seriouslyWelcome back Slooties! Not to be a hater of love and all things happy, but this week we focus on some of the perks of Valentine's Day ENDING. Don’t lie, you know you’re happy that shit is over too. Next, Sofia unpacks the wild world that is Keeping up with the Kardashians…and Kanye West. We unpack it from a micro level and discuss how dangerous the behavior we’re seeing truly is. Which leads us gracefully into this week's Sloot University which hones in on the MANY various types of abuse, and how it’s not always what you see in the movies. Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sloots - just because he says it, it doesn’t mean he really loves you. We learn behaviors to watch out for and how to really look certain things in the eye, no matter how much it hurts. TW: Domestic violence and abusive behaviorNational Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ OK Cupid: Download OK Cupid from the App Store or Google Play today!Native Deodorant: http://www.nativedeo.com/SOFIA or use promo code SOFIA at checkout and get 20% off your first orderBloom Nu: http://www.bloomnu.com/SOFIA for 15% off your purchase today!Download Switchcraft for free and unlock the magical mystery! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This just in: being canceled is the new blue checkmark!Home is where the heart is, and that’s why Sofia is FINALLY coming at you live from her home base AKA Lola’s house in Utah. Well, for half of the episode at least. Today Sofia is joined by podcasting royalty, Claudia Oshrey of The Morning Toast. Cheers to that! Get? Anyway, together, the two talk about some hard-hitting issues in the world…like how chaotic this season of RHOSLC has been. Get ready for a deep psychoanalysis of ALL of the housewives (when in reality Sofia should probably be doing this on herself). Next, the two shamefully discuss the times they were both canceled, how your embarrassing moment on social media WILL pass, and Claudia’s stint on Say Yes To The Dress. The two also give top tier advice on the reality of being an influencer and content creator, and trust…not all that glitters is gold Sloots. I know, sounds superficial but it’s real. Of course, even though we have a special guest, Sofia needed to talk about herself. She takes us along her NYC trip that she just returned from and explains how it turned into a 3-week bender filled with fireball, Pete Davidson, and a “girl” named Molly. It really never ends with Sofia, but that’s why you’re all still here right? Talk soon Sloots!Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ Ship Station: http://www.shipstation.com/SOFIA The Flex Company: http://www.flexfits.com/SOFIA Zola: http://www.Zola.com/OK Cupid: Download OK Cupid from the App Store or Google Play today! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

F is for friends who do stuff together U is for U and Me…Welcome back Slootiez. This week we’re keepin’ it short and sweet in preparation for doomsday next week…aka Valentines Day. ANYWAYS - we cover the most important news of the 21st century this week aka Rihanna being pregnant. While we are SO happy for our kween, we’re already manifesting ways to figure out how we can come back in our next lives as her second child. We also go into a serious but necessary Sloot University regarding friendship. Not just friendship by itself, but being a friend when it’s HARD to be a friend. Everyone speaks so openly about mental illness, but how much do you really show up for your friends who are suffering from it? Today we’re learning how to show up for others while still saving time for ourselves. If there’s one thing about Sloots is that we stick TOGETHER, even when the going gets tough. National Suicide Hotline: 800-273-8255Follow Sofia on Instagram and Twitter @SofiaFranklynFind merch HERE: https://sofiafranklyn.com/ OK Cupid: Download OK Cupid from the App Store or Google Play today!Dipsea: http://dipsea.com/SOFIA for 30 days full access To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices