Upbuilding The Self

Have you struggled to make a conversation productive because there is some tension in the relationship or because you feel triggered? Do you really want to give someone feedback but feel blocked in giving it to them? Michael, Rasanath, and Vipin break down one of the most important tools that they use in their personal lives and in their coaching work with clients: the meta-conversation. They share personal and organizational examples of how to use this tool to unblock frustrating relationships, help build environments of trust, and give feedback when giving feedback feels hard. They give tips and ideas on how to incorporate this tool in our everyday lives.Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

How do you define your self-worth? Why is it so naturally tied to what you produce? Using Sacinandana Swami’s provocative quote as a starting point, Vipin, Michael, and Rasanath share personal examples of how they fall into the trap of defining their value by what they produce. They discuss the true reason behind our longing for a sense of value, the trap/problem of defining our value by what we produce, the impact of doing that, and healthier alternatives to defining our value.Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

Vipin, Hari Prasada, and Rasanath discuss the ego vs. the self, the connection between the ego and truth, using the ego to overcome the ego, the paradox of progress, and the consequences of living solely as the ego.

Do you consider yourself someone who has difficult conversations with ease, or someone who fears them? What does it really mean to have a difficult conversation? What is the role of the heart and our emotions in having difficult conversations? Michael, Hari Prasada and Rasanath take inspiration from a CEO’s experience of needing to fire someone to look at how the ego prevents us from bringing our hearts to conversations, the difference between intentional and unconscious compartmentalization, and the risks (to ourselves and to others) of not bringing our hearts to conversations. Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

Do you donate money to charity so that you feel less guilty about your life, to receive praise, or to get a tax benefit? Should you try to get really rich and then give your money away in order to do the most good? Rasanath and Michael discuss the motivations behind our charitable giving and how to differentiate between egoic and pure motivations. They address what they do when they receive requests to donate to causes that they don’t feel strongly about, the power of thinking about charity as a state of mind rather than a specific act, and a definition of charity which is much broader than giving financial aid to those in need.Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

Have you ever wondered what really happens on bonus day at an investment bank? In this episode, Hari Prasada interviews Michael about his article, Goldman Sachs Bonus Day and the Entitled Ego, and his intense experiences around receiving a bonus during his time at Goldman. They discuss the posturing that went into bonus day, the flimsiness of using compensation as a measure of self-worth, the suffering that comes from not feeling enough, and the key question, “Who would I be if I lost my money, job title, and status?” They conclude by offering concrete ways to go beyond the insecurities of the ego to become less reliant on extrinsic measures of self-worth and more in touch with our real selvesLinks Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

Discover the three sources of introversion and how they shape our self-understanding. Learn about the gifts and challenges faced by introverts, and debunk the myth that extroverts are superior. Dive deep into the complexities of introversion and the importance of navigating it authentically.

Are you a person who changes your beliefs or behaviors in order to please others or to succeed? Do you think this is a positive characteristic? Vipin, Michael, and Rasanath break down what it means to be a chameleon and why many of us go through life feeling pleased with ourselves for being this way. They share real life examples of how they were chameleons in their younger years, how to tell the difference between adaptability and chameleonism, the costs of being chameleonic, and concrete ways to become more adaptable and less chameleonic.Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

Are you driven by inspiration or insecurity? For most of us, the answer will be some combination of both. But are you aware of the relative weight of each, and to what degree you project insecurity as inspiration? In this episode, Hari Prasada interviews Rasanath about his coining of the term, “Inspiration-Insecurity Continuum.” They discuss the dangers of avoiding our insecurities, how to discern real inspiration from insecurity, and how to use the framework to be our best selves. Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild

How do you respond to the question, “How are you?” Do you answer honestly or reflexively? Do you even know what the honest answer is? In this episode, Hari Prasada interviews Michael about his article, “The Oldest Profession in the World.” They analyze the standard responses to the question, ‘How are you?’ and what our responses might be attempting to communicate on a deeper level. They discuss how our egos get in the way of authentic answers and offer alternative questions that get closer to the heart of the matter.Links Enneagram Certification Program Upbuild Coaching Certification Training (starts in October) Upbuild Website Instagram: @upbuildnycFacebook: UpbuildLinkedIn: Upbuild