Psychologists Off the Clock

 For far too long, women have been held responsible for completing an unfair share of work (especially invisible labor) at home. Even if a woman works a full-time job outside of the home, she is often also expected to complete the majority of domestic and emotional labor. What’s to be done about all the “invisible work” women do to keep partnerships afloat? In today’s episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Eve Rodsky, author of Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live), and co-host Jill answer that question. Women have been held to an unreachable standard for too long. Now, take a breather, and join us to learn about creating equal partnerships at home, navigating unmanageable demands, and much, much more! Listen and Learn: About Jill, Diana, and Eve’s personal struggles with trying to be the perfect partner, mother, and worker How an invisible “I should do” list might be affecting your life and your relationship Some important (and shocking!) statistics on how motherhood affects women Why women’s invisible workload matters and how you can help shift the system that supports it Eve’s breakdown of Fair Play - her empirically based, step-by-step system for impacting lasting change in your partnership The important differences between playing fair and keeping score with your partner How modeling good-partner-behavior might impact your kids for the better About Jill’s experience playing Eve’s card-game, The Fair Play Deck (and Eve’s tips-and-tricks for playing fairly) How to connect your work-time balance to your values through a minimum standard of care Resources: Eve’s book, Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) The accompanying card deck for Eve’s book, The Fair Play Deck: A Couple's Conversation Deck for Prioritizing What's Important  Marianne Cooper’s work on women in the workplace and more  Jill’s 2020 report on women in the workplace About Eve Rodsky, J.D. Eve Rodsky is working to change society one marriage at a time by coming up with a new 21st century solution to an age-old problem: women shouldering the brunt of childrearing and domestic life responsibilities regardless of whether they work outside the home. In her New York Times bestselling book Fair Play, she uses her Harvard Law School training and years of organizational management experience to create a life-management system to help couples both rebalance all of the work it takes to run a home and reimagine their relationship, time and purpose. Eve Rodsky received her B.A. in economics and anthropology from the University of Michigan, and her J.D. from Harvard Law School. After working in foundation management at J.P. Morgan, she founded the Philanthropy Advisory Group to advise high-net worth families and charitable foundations on best practices for harmonious operations, governance and disposition of funds. In her work with hundreds of families over a decade, she realized that her expertise in family mediation, strategy, and organizational management could be applied to a problem closer to home – a system for couples seeking balance, efficiency, and peace in their home. Rodsky was born and raised by a single mom in New York City and now lives in Los Angeles with her husband and their three children. Visit her website to learn more! Related Episodes: Episode 137. The Complexities of Motherhood with Daphne de MarnEpisode 168. Everyday Conversations: How Conversational Style Impacts Relationships with Deborah TannenEpisode 121. Be Mighty: An Episode for Stressed Out, Worried Women with Dr. Jill StoddardEpisode 174. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sleep is a hot topic right now, and many health experts argue your sleep is as important as eating well and exercising for your mental and physical health. Sleep medicine research has advanced a lot, and there is new information about what it is and why we do it, and strategies that work for insomnia. We can all rest easy because in this episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, co-host Diana is joined by one of the top experts -- Dr. Rafael Pelayo from Stanford Health Care Sleep Medicine Center. In this episode, Dr. Pelayo, author of How to Sleep, provides an overview of sleep, sleep’s function, and strategies to help you get a better night’s rest tonight. Get cozy, and join us to take a deep dive into the world of sleep and change yours for the better!   Listen and Learn:   The different stages, the cycles within the stages, and what happens when any of those are interruptedWhat the function of dreams might beThe indications of remembering (or not remembering) your dreams What happens when we experience insomnia and how to put it to bedHow our phones (or, as Dr. Pelayo calls them, our handheld computers) are impacting our sleep and what to do about itWhat to do when you wake up in the night (Hint: It’s not what you think!)How to get your kids to fall asleep and stay in bedDr. Pelayo’s expert opinion on co-sleepingAbout Diana and Dr. Pelayo’s personal experiences with winding down before bedtimeWhat to look for and when it’s the right time to visit a specialist Why you should probably go visit a doctor if your snoring every night   Sleep Resources:   Dr. Pelayo’s book, How to Sleep: The New Science-Based Solutions for Sleeping Through the NightVisit Diana's website to get her FREE meditation to help you fall asleepCheck out our First Annual Psychologists Off the Clock Wise Minds Summit where Dr. Paleyo will offer a live question and answer session!   About Rafael Pelayo, MD:   Dr. Rafael Pelayo   Dr. Rafael Pelayo, author of How to Sleep, is a clinical professor at Stanford University where he co-authored the textbook for and continues to teach the popular Sleep and Dreams undergraduate course (where you may get squirted with a water gun for sleeping!). Since 1993, he has worked with the Stanford Health Care Sleep Medicine Center. His initial exposure to sleep medicine was as a medical student working with Dr. Michael Thorpy at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine. He joined the Stanford Sleep Disorders Clinic in 1993 as a fellow and never left. In 2013, he was appointed as a clinical professor at the Sleep Medicine division of the department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Science at Stanford University. Dr. Pelayo’s clinical focus has been the treatment of sleep disorders in patients of all ages. He has lectured nationally and internationally and has appeared frequently in television, radio, and print. He has served as chair of the Sleep Disorders Research Advisory Board of the National Center for Sleep Disorders Research at the National Heart Lung Blood Institute at the NIH. He has also chaired the pediatric special interest section of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine. You can find out more about Dr. Pelayo on his Stanford profile or at the California Sleep Society webpage.      7. Insomnia: Strategies to Stop Struggling with Sleep with Dr. Alisha Brosse60. Helping Children Sleep With Gaby Wentworth59. Zzzzzz…The Science of Sleep45. Rest with Dr. Alex Soojung-Kim Pang      Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Working parenthood is hard, and even the most Instagram-perfect parents and professionals have their fair share of tears, overwhelm, guilt, and anxiety. Though there are no simple solutions, learning how to work and parent more mindfully can help you build greater success and have more joy. Join our conversation with Lori Mihalich-Levin, author of Back to Work After Baby: How to Plan and Navigate a Mindful Return from Maternity Leave, founder of Mindful Return, and Working Mother Magazine's “working mama guru.” Lori talks with co-host Yael about the ins and outs of mindful working parenthood. When you tune in, you'll learn tips that can help you work and parent more successfully and more joyfully, even in the face of the day-to-day challenges working parents experience. So go ahead and snuggle your nearest kiddo while you learn how to more mindfully enjoy your baby and your career! Listen and Learn: What motivates Lori and her personal tips on how to take on the impossible in work and parenting Why companies fail to retain women after they have children How to be a psychologically flexible working parent About the strategies Lori uses in her personal life to navigate parenting, her career, and her sanity What mindfulness is, what it involves, and how to be mindful in your own life Recommendations for parents who struggle with the guilt that often accompanies juggling multiple roles How to plan effectively (even if you aren’t a self-proclaimed planning nerd like Lori!) Why boundaries are necessary and how you can establish them Lori’s tips for using your parenting skills to become a more effective leader at work How to build community, and why you should About the importance of passion projects for your work as a parent and your work at work! About Lori’s work in diversifying her Mindful Return courses to meet the needs of more individuals, including dads and parents of children with special needs Work, Parenting, and Mindfulness Resources Mentioned in This Episode Lori’s Mindful Return Program (and the mom-specific, dad-specific, and parents of children with special needs versions, as well as a course for employers) Lori’s book, Back to Work After Baby: How to Plan and Navigate a Mindful Return from Maternity Leave The Free Meditation App - Insight Timer Emily Oster’s book, Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool Lori's podcast, Parents at Work Parenting in a Pandemic support groups for moms and dads About "Working Mama Guru" Lori Mihalich-Levin, JD Lori is the founder of Mindful Return, author of Back to Work After Baby: How to Plan and Navigate a Mindful Return from Maternity Leave, and creator of the Mindful Return Maternity Leave E-Course. She is mama to two wonderful red-headed boys (ages 7 and 9), is the co-host of the Parents at Work Podcast, and is a partner in the health care practice at Dentons US LLP. Her passion is empowering new parents by providing them with the strategies and tools they need to be present with their babies and in their careers. Lori’s work has appeared in the New York Times Parenting, The Washington Post, Thrive Global, and The Huffington Post. And just recently, she was featured in The Female CEO Magazine. Lori holds a law degree from the Georgetown University Law Center and completed her undergraduate studies at Princeton University’s Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs. She has been committed to promoting women’s equality and leadership throughout her career. Most recently, she founded and Co-Chaired for two years Dentons’ Parent Professional Network (now ParentsLEAD). In her prior job, she founded both the Returning to Work Community (RWC) for mothers at Association of A... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

 In his TEDx talk, Michael Herold, public speaker, confidence coach, and podcaster extraordinaire, says, “Things you will achieve in your life, you will achieve because of your disability, not in spite of it.” In this week’s episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Michael talks with Debbie and Yael about confidence, self-doubt, and overcoming limitations. Limitations are all around us. These might be thoughts about how unqualified we are, feelings of anxiety, or even physical disabilities such as spinal muscular atrophy, but Michael Herold has some good news. We can overcome the limitations that come from our own heads, by taking Comfort Zone Challenges! Join us in this episode to learn about how to work with those limitations, instead of against them, to achieve the life you want. The Psychologists Off the Clock are excited to welcome Michael aboard as our new Strategic Consultant. Join us to for this episode to meet Michael and learn about our new team member! Listen and Learn How to build confidence and step outside your comfort zone About Michael’s transition from animator to public speaker, coach, and podcaster Why Acceptance and Commitment Therapy resonates with Michael and how it changed his life How Michael’s disability, spinal muscular atrophy, has shaped his unique perspective How you can use values to overcome your limitations About motivational porn and the microaggressions we often use when discussing people who have ‘overcome’ disability-related limitations Why it’s so important to connect with people and how to do that Inside information on how Coach Michael works to build his clients’ confidence Tips and tricks from the master himself on how to build your own confidence Resources from this Podcast Episode Michael's TEDx talk Michael’s website Michael's podcast: The Art of Charm The Art of Charm Podcast's Episode featuring Michael The Art of Charm Podcast's Core Confidence Program Viktor Frankl's Book: Man's Search for Meaning Michael’s Short Film “When I grow up” All of Michael’s short animated films  Michael Herold About Michael Herold Early in his life, doctors told Michael Herold’s parents that his severe disability would keep him from living a normal life. The doctors were right. Michael’s life has been anything but normal. In fact, he is quite a renaissance man. For over a decade, Michael was a successful animator for Nickelodeon and worked on a variety of shows including Penguins of Madagascar and Kung Fu Panda. He currently does public speaking around the world and has recently spoken in front of parliament and given a TEDx talk. Michael also uses skills and exercises from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to provide coaching on a variety of life-skills including public speaking, self-doubt, communication, and, primarily, confidence. Visit Michael’s website to find out more!   Episode 91. Disability as a Form of Diversity with Dr. Erin AndrewsEpisode 169. Microaggressions, Mental Health Disparities, and Racial Trauma with Monnica WilliamsEpisode 102. A Liberated Mind with Dr. Steven HayesEpisode 72. Committed Action with Dr. DJ MoranEpisode 32. Social Connection: Exploring Loneliness and Building Intimacy      Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Performance pressure is pushing down on us and Queen was right - that pressure is terrifying! In this Psychologists Off the Clock podcast episode, Yael speaks with Dr. Sian Beilock, an expert on performance and brain science, and author of Choke: What the Secrets of the Brain Reveal About Getting it Right When You Have to. Listen in to hear Sian's insights and about her research into how our experiences, neurology, emotions, and thoughts interact to both foster and stump our ability to perform under pressure. You'll learn about how mind-body communication leads to sub-optimal performance. And you'll gain knowledge and strategies to make high pressure situations work to your advantage! Performing under pressure is a skill, like any other, Sian tells us. Tune in to learn how to build it. Listen and Learn: Why Sian started studying choking in the first place (hint: it was a bit of 'me-search') Sian’s definition of choking What types of situations and personal characteristics lend themselves to choking What’s going on physiologically and neurologically when you're choking under pressure Strategies, tips, and tricks from Sian for dealing with choking About embodied cognition, rest, and relaxation How perfectionism and role switching might be involved in choking Why self-compassion is so important when you’re performing under pressure How prejudice, stereotypes, diversity, and evaluative apprehension impact the likelihood of choking Performing Under Pressure Resources Mentioned: Sian’s book - Choke: What the Secrets of the Brain Reveal About Getting it Right When You Have to Sian’s book - How the Body Knows Its Mind: The Surprising Power of the Physical Environment to Influence How You Think and Feel Alex Pang’s book, Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less Jessica Lahey’s book, The Gift of Failure Carol Dweck’s book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success Deborah Spar’s book, Wonder Women: Sex, Power, and the Quest for Perfection About Choke Expert Dr. Sian Beilock: A cognitive scientist by training, Dr. Sian Beilock earned her Bachelor of Science in cognitive science from the University of California, San Diego, and doctorates of philosophy in both kinesiology and psychology from Michigan State University. Sian has served as the eighth President of Barnard College at Columbia University since 2017. Her work as a cognitive scientist revolves around performance anxiety and reveals simple psychological strategies that can be used to ensure success in everything from test taking and public speaking to athletics and job interviews. Sian is one of the world’s leading experts on the brain science behind performing under pressure and the brain and body factors influencing all types of choking (from test-taking to public speaking to your golf swing). She has authored two critically acclaimed books published in more than a dozen languages - Choke: What the Secrets of the Brain Reveal About Getting it Right When You Have to and How the Body Knows Its Mind: The Surprising Power of the Physical Environment to Influence How You Think and Feel, as well as over 100 peer-reviewed publications. Her 2017 TED talk on why we choke under pressure has been viewed over 2 million times. You can find out more about Dr. Beilock here. Related Episodes from The Psychologists Off the Clock Podcast: Episode 34. Strengths, Goal Setting, and Grit with Dr. Alexis Karris Bachik Episode 45. Rest with Dr. Alex Soojung-Kim Pang Episode 75: Mindful Self-Compassion with Christopher Germer Episode 88. Perfectionism with Sharon Martin Episode 161. The Gift of Failure with Jessica Lahey Episode 166. How to Manage Multiple Life Roles Skillfully with Sarah Argenal Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Compassion is not a passive process, but an active one. It means being aware that someone (including you) is suffering and moving toward that suffering so that you can offer help. Compassion takes courage, wisdom, and strength. And, we can build more compassionate minds with practice. In this episode, Diana talks with Dennis Tirch and Laura Silberstein-Tirch about Compassion Focused Therapy, how they apply the principles of compassion to their family and in their work as founders and director of the Center for Compassion Focused Therapy. Listen in to hear heartfelt insights for a more compassionate future. Listen and Learn: Why it’s so hard to be compassionate when we feel threatenedWhy we have an inner critic and how to respond when it shoes itThe core qualities to develop to build a more compassionate mindHow compassion is different from kindnessHow we can respond to a long, dark winter with compassionHow we can heal divides with compassionWhat yoga and compassion focused therapy have in commonSuggestions to build a more compassionate future together Resources: The ACT Practitioners Guide to the Science of Compassion by Dennis Tirch, Benji Schoendorff, and Laura TirchHow to be Nice to Yourself by Laura Silberstein-TirchStephan Porges on the Polyvagal TheoryThe Compassionate Mind Foundation About Laura Silberstein-Tirch Dr. Laura Silberstein-Tirch Laura R. Silberstein-Tirch, PsyD, is the Director of the Center for Compassion Focused Therapy., and serves as an Adjunct Assistant Professor at Albert Einstein College of Medicine of Yeshiva University. Dr. Silberstein-Tirch is a clinical supervisor and compassion-focused therapy (CFT) trainer who presents internationally on mindfulness and compassion and is an author of 3 books, including “How to Be Nice To Yourself." She is a founder and Past-President of the New York City chapter of the Association for Contextual Behavioral Science and the Compassionate Mind Foundation USA. Her research interests include psychological flexibility and emotions as well as CFT for anxiety and depression. About Dennis Tirch Dr. Dennis Tirch Dennis Tirch, Ph.D. is the Founder of The Center for Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) in NYC, Past-President of The Association for Contextual Behavioral Science (ACBS), President of The Compassionate Mind Foundation, North America and an Associate Clinical Professor at The Icahn School of Medicine at Mt. Sinai, NYC. He is an internationally acknowledged expert psychotherapist, supervisor and trainer in CFT, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and Buddhist Psychology (BP). Dr. Tirch is an author of 7 books, numerous book chapters and peer-reviewed articles on mindfulness-based psychotherapies. Dr. Tirch regularly trains CFT and ACT globally, through workshops and courses in-person and online. His work has been covered by The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post and NPR among other media outlets. Through regular Twitter and other social media posts, Dr. Tirch shares compassion focused insights with tens of thousands of people each day. Dr. Tirch is an Ambassador for the Ram Dass Fellowship, and an advocate for yoga, sobriety, and vegetarian/vegan living. Dr. Tirch is a Zen dharma holder, lay teacher of Sharma. 50. Compassion Focused Therapy with Dr. Russel Kolts145. Caring, Compassion, and Cooperation with Paul Gilbert90. Dr. Paul Gilbert on Tricky Brains, Caring, and Living like Crazy147. Extending Compassion with Dr. Janina Scarlet and Sara Shairer 46. Altruism and the Flow of Compassion with Dr. Yotam Heinberg131. COVID-19 Anxiety, Cultivating Safeness, and Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Join Diana for a short but sweet Soothing Rhythm Breathing break!   Soothing Rhythm Breathing is an exercise from Compassion Focused Therapy. It is particularly helpful when you feel anxiety, anger, or other emotional dysregulation. Soothing Rhythm Breathing stimulates the vagus nerve, increases heart rate variability, and activates the Parasympathetic Nervous System. Soothing Rhythm Breathing shifts your body/brain systems from drive and threat toward safeness and compassion.     131. COVID-19 Anxiety, Cultivating Safeness, and Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Stephen Porges81. A Gift For You: 10 Min Breathing Meditation70. A Gift For You: Loving-Kindness MeditationA Gift For You: Pranayama Breathing Meditation   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Microaggressions. These small, often unintentional acts of racism are probably affecting you more than you know! In this week’s podcast episode, Dr. Monnica Williams, author of Managing Microaggressions: Addressing Everyday Racism in Therapeutic Spaces and co-author of Eliminating Race-Based Mental Health Disparities: Promoting Equity and Culturally Responsive Care across Settings, and our co-host Debbie discuss microaggressions in therapy spaces, race-based mental health disparities, and racial trauma. Join us for an informative episode, where we can grow and learn together! "Good people can and do commit acts of racism."Dr. Monnica Williams Listen and Learn: What microaggressions are and why they’re so pervasiveThe different categories of microaggressions How microaggressions have affected Debbie and Dr. Williams personally How self-identity impacts the occurrence and aftermath of microaggressionsHow subtle, covert microaggressions impact race-based Mental Health treatment disparityThe psychological impact of microaggressions and racial traumaDr. Monnica Williams’s recommendations for the mistakes therapists make in therapyDr. Monnica-approved methods for pointing out, apologizing for, and validating the experience of microaggressions if you commit one (as we all do sometimes!)  Resources Mentioned on the Podcast: Link to our sponsorship pageFollow Dr. Monnica on Twitter: @DrMonnica Visit Dr. Monnica’s website: http://www.monnicawilliams.com Dr. Monnica’s blog on psychology today: Culturally SpeakingDr. Monnica’s book: Eliminating Race-Based Mental Health Disparities: Promoting Equity and Culturally Responsive Care across Settings Dr. Monnica’s book: Managing Microaggressions: Addressing Everyday Racism in Therapeutic Spaces About Monnica Williams:  Dr. Monnica Williams is a board-certified, licensed clinical psychologist, specializing in cognitive-behavioral therapies. She is an Associate Professor in the School of Psychology at the University of Ottawa, Canada Research Chair in Mental Health Disparities, and Director of the Laboratory for Culture and Mental Health Disparities. She is also the Clinical Director of the Behavioral Wellness Clinic, LLC in Tolland, Connecticut, and she has founded clinics in Kentucky, Virginia, and Pennsylvania. Dr. Williams completed her undergraduate studies at MIT and UCLA. She received her doctoral degree in clinical psychology from the University of Virginia. She was an assistant professor at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine in the Department of Psychiatry for four years, where she worked with Dr. Edna Foa who is a world renowned expert on OCD and PTSD. She was also a director of the Center for Mental Health Disparities at the University of Louisville.  Dr. Williams has published over 100 peer reviewed articles, books, chapters, and scientific reports with a focus on anxiety related conditions and cultural considerations. She was named one of the top 25 thought leaders in PTSD by PTSD Journal, and she frequently contributes to the public scientific discourse as a media expert. She is frequently featured on PBS, NPR, and the New York times, and she has a fantastic blog on psychology today called Culturally Speaking. Along with Daniel Rosen and Johnathan Kanter, Dr. Monnica co-authored the book Eliminating Race-Based Mental Health Disparities: Promoting Equity and Culturally Responsive Care across Settings. In this episode, we discussed her most recent book, Managing Microaggressions: Addressing Everyday Racism in Therapeutic Spaces. You can learn more about all of Dr. Williams’ work here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A great wizard once said, “Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it." Humans are social animals who thrive on effective communication. However, each of us has a different communication style, and sometimes, differences in those communication styles inflict injury. In today’s world, where communication looks very different than it used to, understanding differences in communication styles and learning to remedy word-inflicted wounds is of utmost importance. In this timely episode, Dr. Deborah Tannen talks with Jill about how communication styles affect our everyday relationships. Join us to learn more on the ‘best’ way to talk in different contexts, gender differences in communication styles, saying what you mean, meaning what you say, and much more! Listen and Learn: Dr. Tannen’s definition of conversational styleWhy communication style is important in various domains including intimate relationships, workplace relations, and difficult conversations Saying what you mean and meaning what you sayJill and Dr. Tannen’s account of gender differences in communication stylesDr. Tannen’s wisdom on the ‘best way to talk’What a double bind is and how it affects women Questions and phrases you can use to improve your communication style right nowHow different communication platforms change the intent of your words Resources Link to our sponsorship pageGary Chapman’s five love languagesVisit Yael’s website to find out more on her work with couples Dr. Tannen’s memoir and where you can purchase itInformation on Dr. Arlie Hochschild Dr. Tannen’s books, That's Not What I Meant! and Talking from 9 to 5Alicia Menendez’s book, The Likeability Trap Dr. Tannen’s training video on women’s language in the workplace The New York Times’ article, It's Not Just You: In Online Meetings, Many Women Can't Get a Word In About Dr. Deborah Tannen Dr. Tannen is a University Professor and Professor Linguistics at Georgetown University and author of many books and articles about how the language of everyday conversation affects relationships. She is best known as the author of You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation, a book that has brought gender differences in communication style to the forefront of public awareness as a New York Times best seller. Her collected works include eight books for general audiences as well as sixteen books and over one hundred articles for scholarly audiences. Dr. Tannen is one of only six in Georgetown University’s College of Arts and Sciences who hold the distinguished rank of University Professor. She has been McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princeton University and spent a term in residence at the Institute for Advanced Study in Princeton, New Jersey. She has twice been a fellow at the Center for Advanced Study in the Behavioral Sciences at Stanford in Palo Alto, California. The recipient of five honorary doctorates, she is a member of the PEN/Faulkner Foundation Board of Directors. Read her recent essays in The New York Times and The Forward or view a full list of her articles for general audiences here. To learn more about what Dr. Tannen is up to, visit her website at deborahtannen.com. Related episodes Episode 163: The Likeability Trap with Alicia MenendezEpisode 165: How We Talk and Why It Matters with Katherine KinzlerEpisode 62: Language, Suffering, and Meaning with Dr. Matthieu VillatteEpisode 104: You’re Doing it Wrong with Professors Bethany Johnson and Margaret QuinlanEpisode 121: Be Mighty: An Episode for Stressed Out, Worried Women with Dr. Jill StoddardEpisode 28: Maintaining And Healing Romantic Bonds With R... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We all have unhelpful habits, and whether you overeat, use substances, or worry, you may have noticed these habits have gotten worse lately. In this episode, Diana joins Dr. Judson Brewer (Dr. Jud), neuroscientist and author of The Craving Mind: From Cigarettes to Smartphones to Love - Why We Get Hooked and How We Can Break Bad Habits, for a fascinating conversation about why stress makes our habits and addictions worse. Additionally, they talk about what’s happening in your brain when you’re caught in these habits, and how to unhook from even the trickiest ones using mindfulness and curiosity. Listen and Learn: Diana’s and Debbie’s pandemic habitsHow Diana’s shifting unhelpful habits to values-based ones (get her free download here!)The three core elements of a habitWhat’s happening in your brain when you are cravingWhy uncertainty and stress makes it harder to break unhealthy habitsHow anxiety and rumination are similar to smoking and eating Dr. Jud’s groundbreaking brain research on mindfulness and the Default Mode NetworkHow curiosity changes your brain and why it is key to unhooking from habit loopsWhy it doesn’t work to “think your way out of a craving” or “think your way out of anxiety”Mindfulness tools you can use right now with yourself and your kids to get groundedWhy swapping choosing kindness and generosity over self-righteous rumination is “so much sweeter”The personal values that underlie Dr. Jud’s work Resources Five Finger Breathing with Dr. Jud BrewerWatch Dr. Jud study Anderson Cooper’s brain in an fMRIThe Craving Mind: From Cigarettes to Smartphones to Love - Why We Get Hooked and How we can Break Bad Habits, by Dr. Judson BrewerDr. Jud’s Ted Talk: A Simple Way To Break a Bad HabitDr. Jud’s App-based behavior change programs: Unwinding Anxiety®, Eat Right Now®, and To Quit®.  Get 20% off with coupon code OFFTHECLOCKChange unhealthy habits into values-rich ones with this handoutDr. Yotam Heinberg on “growing roots” practice Listen to Diana’s interviews with Paul Gilbert here and here to learn more about threat, drive, and compassion systems in the brain Dr. Jud Brewer About Dr. Judson Brewer Dr. Judson Brewer is the Director of Research and Innovation at the Mindfulness Center and associate professor in psychiatry at the School of Medicine at Brown University, as well as a research affiliate at MIT. Before that, he held research and teaching positions at Yale University and the University of Massachusetts’ Center for Mindfulness. Read more about his research here. As an addiction psychiatrist and internationally known expert in mindfulness training for treating addictions, Dr. Jud has developed and tested novel mindfulness programs for habit change, including both in-person and app-based treatments for smoking, emotional eating, and anxiety (Eat Right Now, Unwinding Anxiety and Craving to Quit). Based on the success of these programs in the lab, he co-founded MindSciences, Inc. to create app-based digital therapeutic versions of these programs for a wider audience, working with individuals, corporations, and hospital systems to put effective, evidence-based behavior change guidance in the hands of people struggling with unwanted behaviors and “everyday addictions.” 72. Committed Action with Dr. DJ Moran103. Healthy Habits with Dr. Dayna Lee-Baggley4. Habits: The Science of Behavior Change90. Dr. Paul Gilbert on Tricky Brains, Caring, and Living Like Crazy145. Caring, Compassion, and Cooperation with Dr. Paul Gilbert46. Altruism And The Flow Of Compassion With Dr. Yotam Heineberg Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.