Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

It's a very special episode of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship dedicated to the much-discussed and debated friendship triangle in White Lotus Season 3 created by Mike White.The friendship trio of Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie has captivated TV viewers for the last two months. Similarly, Rebekah Jacobs (Dear Nina's assistant producer) and I have been texting and talking between episodes. Now that the season finale has aired, we shared all the lessons we think Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie imparted on the world. Even their mistakes gave us plenty of friendship advice to ponder.A big point that Rebekah and I agree on: Not all friendship triangles are bad! YES, even this particular trio has us defending friendship triangles. No friendship "shape" is good or bad. How individuals behave creates healthy or unhealthy friendships!WHITE LOTUS INSPIRED FRIENDSHIP ADVICE WE DISCUSSED:Think carefully before sharing information with a friend. (Kate telling Laurie about Valentin)Be vulnerable sooner than you think. (Laurie didn't have to wait until the last night of the trip.)Be direct, not passive-aggressive. And don't assume friends can read your mind.Apologize and accept apologies when they're genuineFriends don't always have to be on the same page about everythingGive your friends grace to mess up/ let some things go Friends are not necessarily mirrors of each otherAllow friends to change and growKnow the difference between gossip vs. genuine care and concernGive old friendships some of the fun, ease, and benefit of the doubt we give fresh, new friendships (Chelsea/Chloe vs. the trio of old friends)Don't a friend to meet every needTruth daggers hurt. You can be honest with your friends without being cruel.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:You're the Only One I Can Tell by Deborah TannenEpisode 136: Your 3-5 Closest FriendsALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

The Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for April is about the sometimes tricky topic of friends' birthdays. The challenge itself is simple and the easiest so far in 2025. I'm encouraging listeners to actively seek out friends' birthdays so you don't have to rely on social media to know the date. Of course the next step is to acknowledge friends on their birthdays, again not only relying solely social media. The rest of the episode explores the emotional complexities surrounding birthdays, comparing how other friends' birthdays get celebrated, and why I believe in planning your own parties. While talking I realized we need a part two of this topic because I introduced many more questions than answers. I'd love to hear your thoughts and if celebrating friends' birthdays and your own brings up any feelings. I definitely shared some! Reach out any time at ninabadzin@gmail.com or anonymously here. Find the past friendship challenges here. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome to Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. I'm your host, Nina Badzin. I've been writing about friendship for over 10 years and podcasting about it for almost four. This episode on how to start a podcast might not be for you. So, send it to your friend who has been thinking about starting a podcast! I break down the process, explaining each aspect from concept, podcast art, music, format, equipment, recording, editing, hosting your episodes, marketing, realistic expectations for your friends' interest, realistic exceptions for how much a guest will share. All in less than 35 minutes! Links to everything I mentioned in the episode:My podcast strategy sessions: Here you go!Podcast art and episode graphics: Canva.com Basic equipment: Microphone, mic arm, headphones, Equipment I added later: mixer , camera, streaming light Recording, editing, and social media clips: Riverside.fmMy favorite editing software: DescriptSound cleanup: Auphonic.comA hosting suggestion(my first host)---BuzzsproutAnother hosting suggestion (my current host)--RedCircleOther hosting suggestions: Spotify for Creators, Substack ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Your neighborhood community might be the most overlooked place for social connection. However, it’s essential to understand the difference between community relationships and friendships. They are not the same!I’m joined by Seth D. Kaplan, author of FRAGILE NEIGHBORHOODS: Repairing American Society One Zip Code at a Time, to discuss the importance of social health in fostering community connections.We delve into the impact of technology, the decline of neighborhood schools, and policies that impact community disconnection and inequality, while also offering practical steps for individuals and cities to enhance social engagement and rebuild neighborhood ties.In this conversation, Seth Kaplan and I also contrast community relationships with friendships. We discuss the importance of being part of a community, the decay of middle-ring relationships, and the role of participation (showing up!) in fostering a supportive environment. Kaplan shares research along with personal anecdotes and ideas about community engagement. I spent time dwelling on my favorite concept—the gemach—a communal lending system that exemplifies the spirit of cooperation and support.Meet Seth D. KaplanSeth D. Kaplan, a leading expert on fragile states, societies, and communities, is the author of Fragile Neighborhoods: Repairing American Society, One Zip Code at a Time (Little, Brown Spark 2023). He is a Professorial Lecturer in the Paul H. Nitze School of Advanced International Studies (SAIS) at Johns Hopkins University, Senior Adviser for the Institute for Integrated Transitions (IFIT), and consultant to organizations such as the World Bank, U.S. State Department, United States Institute of Peace, and OECD. Find Seth on LinkedIn and on his website.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here. Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Many of us enjoy walking with friends for the mental and physical benefits (or could consider starting with the Dear Nina 2025 friendship challenge). However, the power of walking with friends is EXTRA inspiring in today’s episode.Leslie Hooton had to learn to walk multiple times throughout her life because of a stroke she had when she was born and numerous surgeries she's endured since. Leslie shares how neighborhood friends each took an assigned day when her beloved gym closed so that Leslie's muscles would get the essential movement necessary to keep her on her feet and healthy.Leslie shares wisdom on friendship she gained through these walks and through life in general. This is one you don't want to miss if you didn't catch it the first time.Meet Leslie HootonLeslie is the author of three novels. Her most recent book, After Everyone Else, was the winner of an Indie Book Award. Leslie says her best quality is her village of friends. Her second book is dedicated to them. Leslie often remarks that some people have a stroke of luck, she had a stroke at birth. The limited use of her right side and numerous surgeries have allowed Leslie a unique perspective, which she brings to her writing. Leslie uses dictation for her writing and often jokes “I haven’t typed a single word." You can find more information on Leslie's book on her website and on Instagram.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

What if you have lots of friends, but nobody feels like your special confidante or the person who would have your back no matter what? The newest letter spotlight episode comes from a listener who signed off as "Too Many Fish in the Sea." She feels lucky to have cultivated a wide community and plenty of friends, but she doesn't feel like she has super close friends.Joining me to answer the letter is my assistant producer, Rebekah Jacobs. Rebekah has been working with me for a while, but I wanted to get her on the mic so you can hear why I adore working with her so much. AND we're good friends---newer good friends--with our own friendship story to share.We discussed concrete ways for getting closer to people you already like and creating deeper bonds: increase the frequency of your time together, share good news, be "messy," ask for a favor, change the venue, and become beginners together.MEET REBEKAH JACOBS:Rebekah has been a reading specialist and writing instructor for over 20 years, teaching in Boston, Chicago, DC, and Los Angeles. Currently, she teaches college writing in DC, and her own writing has been featured in Kveller. As assistant producer for Dear Nina, she is passionate about ideation and brainstorming creative concepts. She tries to read 80 books a year and loves TV—though, unlike Nina, cooking and tech are not her strong suit. She lives with her husband, three kids, and a goldendoodle named Peanut.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:Episode #19: with Rebekah Jacobs-- Novels and Memoirs About FriendshipEpisode #62: with Leslie Hooten-- The Friendship of the Weekly Walking PartnersEpisode #173: with Ruchi Koval-- I'm Just Not Into This FriendshipEpisode #126 with Anna Goldfarb-- Is it Time For a Friendship Cleanse?Episode #134 with SC Perot-- Fandom and the Potential for FriendshipAnna's book: Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued ConnectionsRebekah mentioned: The Five Types of Wealth by Sahil Bloom and a Laurie Santos reference to a beautiful mess here from Date Like A Scientist. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

There are local friends and there are “HYPERLOCAL” friends. This month in the Dear Nina community, we’re focusing on hyperlocal friendships—developing new ones and maintaining the ones you already have in your life. I introduce the March friendship challenge in this episode, which of course you can start any day of ANY MONTH. The challenge this month focuses on hyperlocal friendships, emphasizing the significance of proximity in building connections. I share some personal anecdotes and practical tips for engaging with friends in your neighborhood or at least nearby. I’m encouraging listeners to take actionable steps to add this important layer to their social lives. As always, the Dear Nina friendship challenges help you to become a better friend and have better friendships. Stay in touch and let me know how it’s going in the Dear Nina Facebook group, through my newsletter at dearnina.substack.com, or on Instagram at @dearninafriendship.LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:Episode #127: January challenge--See a Friend in PersonEpisode #131: February challenge--Start a Ritual with FriendsFragile Neighborhoods by Seth D. KaplanALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

MAKING FRIENDS IN A FANDOM COMMUNITYFandom, especially very enthusiastic fandom, can provide community, belonging, and friendship. In episode #134 of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, I'm joined by Vanderbilt professor, lawyer, author, and joy enthusiast, SC Perot, who shares her story of rediscovering joy after a devastating divorce, highlighting how her newfound interest in Harry Styles and the community surrounding his concerts provided a much-needed escape and a way to connect with people who wanted to discuss something other than divorce. A formerly-casual fan of Harry Styles, SC ended up attending 17 Harry Styles concerts in five countries!SC and I discuss her memoir Styles of Joy: A Feel-Good Framework for Rediscovering Joy (with a Twist!), which encompass her study of joy, the importance of being open to new experiences, the power of shared interests in fostering new friendships, the particular qualities of emotional generosity and uncomplicated friendships in fan communities.This conversation highlights the significance of community and the joy that comes from the deep love of a musician, team, book series, or anything where a fan community forms. Ultimately, all friends start as strangers, and fan communities are a great place to bond with strangers over a shared passion.MEET SC PEROTSarah Catherine "SC" Perot was born and raised in Dallas, Texas, and currently lives in Nashville, Tennessee. She is a proud graduate of Vanderbilt University and Stanford Law School, where she earned a Juris Doctor degree. After practicing law, she pivoted during the pandemic to follow a longtime desire to teach. She is presently an Adjunct Faculty member at her alma mater, Vanderbilt University, where she teaches in the Human and Organizational Development department. The running through line of her varied career and life is a steadfast love for people and storytelling. Find her on Instagram @scperot.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Talking to Friends About Sex at Any AgeIt's not uncommon to discuss our sex lives with friends during the adolescent and college years. But as we age, it becomes less comfortable. Trust and privacy (of our partner) can be significant barriers to discussing intimate details as well as a fear that friends will judge our issues, desires, and choices.Dr. Arielle Buch-Frohlich, a clinical psychologist specializing in sex and couples therapy, joins me to remind listeners how discussing sex with friends at any age can have major benefits. Perhaps our sex lives, as we get older, would stay better, healthier, more robust, or we'd have better feelings about it, if we were talking about it with our friends.Dr. Arielle feels that normalizing conversations about sex, despite significant taboos around this topic, can lead to healthier relationships since human sexuality evolves over time, just like we do. She says that single and married friends can share experiences, but it requires mutual trust. We discuss how romance/fantasy novels and certain shows and movies can facilitate conversations about sex and other ideas for broaching the topic with friends.Meet Dr. Arielle Buch-FrohlichDr. Arielle Buch-Frohlich is a clinical psychologist licensed in Ontario and Quebec. She completed a doctorate in Clinical Psychology (Psy.D) from the Université du Québec à Montréal (UQAM) and received clinical training from the Sex and Couple Therapy Service at the Allen Memorial Institute. Dr. Arielle specializes in sex and relationships, to help individuals and couples thrive. Additionally, Dr. Arielle seeks to help young couples thrive through the transition to parenthood, with expertise in fertility, perinatal and postpartum mental health.For more information, please email dr.arielle.therapy@gmail.com or book a free consult online at annasalomon.com.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

While friendship is an essential type of connection at every age and the one area of personal growth I discuss most often on Dear Nina, today’s guest, psychologist Dr. Adam Dorsay, expands the conversation to the four types of connections we need to lead fulfilling lives. Those four areas are: connection to ourselves, to others, to the world, and to something greater. Dr. Adam, author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love, shares the FEED model for enhancing connection. We also talk about the consequences of disconnection, the nuances of loneliness and solitude, strategies for revitalizing old friendships, the role of activities in making new friends, and the impact of fear of rejection on social interactions. Super Psyched has been endorsed by Lori Gottlieb, Daniel H. Pink, Mel Robbins, Guy Kawasaki, A.J. Jacobs, and many others. And Dr. Adam and I got along so well on this episode that we also recorded an episode about adult friendships on his podcast! (Ep #247 of SuperPsyched, “A Conversation With Nina Badzin”)MEET DR. ADAM DORSAY:Dr. Adam Dorsay is a licensed psychologist and executive coach in Silicon Valley where he serves high-achieving adults (including professionals, executives, entrepreneurs, and professional athletes). Adam is the host of SuperPsyched, an award-winning podcast, and the author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love.Beyond his private practice, Adam is a resiliency expert who co-created an international program for Facebook’s Online Safety employees for several years. He now serves as the resiliency consultant to DigitalOcean and has frequent requests from the media for interviews. He has provided keynotes and trainings to multiple corporations and organizations, including Microsoft, Linkedin, and the California Psychological Association. He is happily married, the father of young boys, and he has a hypoallergenic 33-pound Australian Labradoodle therapy dog named Raffi, who lives at his home and works at his office.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.Thank you to this week's sponsor: https://www.sassythoughts.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands