The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD
Alexandra Stockwell, MD
Welcome to "The Intimate Marriage Podcast," the podcast where we explore the secrets to cultivating passionate and intimate relationships. I'm your host, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell, aka "The Intimacy Doctor," an experienced intimacy coach and marriage expert.
In every committed marriage, intimacy and connection are the foundation for a fulfilling relationship. Join me as we delve into how small shifts and being uncompromising in your daily interactions can lead to profound and nourishing physical/emotional intimacy.
During each episode, we'll explore topics such as sexual intimacy, emotional awareness, and building an intimate connection that feels comfortable and authentic for you and your partner. I'll share practical advice and strategies to help you unlock the full potential of your relationship.
As "The Intimacy Doctor," I've helped countless couples transform their relationships and create a life filled with passion, purpose, and deep satisfaction. With over two decades of experience, I believe that true intimacy and success stem from being unapologetically yourself. Together, let's uncover the secrets to a juicy, nourishing, and intimate marriage.
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Download the first chapter of my bestselling book, “Uncompromising Intimacy,” here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=book
If you're ready to take your intimacy skills to the next level, explore my Aligned & Hot Marriage program. It's designed specifically for couples who refuse to settle for anything less than extraordinary love and connection. Visit https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/aligned-hot-marriage/?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ahm to learn more.
Join my email list to stay connected—it’s where I share my latest insights and offer opportunities for live Q & A: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=subscribe
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WHAT DOES AN INTIMACY COACH DO?
An intimacy coach is a trained professional who specializes in helping individuals and couples cultivate deeper connections and enhance their intimate relationships. The role of an intimacy coach is to guide and support their clients in exploring various aspects of intimacy, including emotional, physical, and sexual intimacy.
Intimacy coaches create a safe and non-judgmental space for their clients to express their needs, desires, and concerns related to intimacy. An intimacy coach helps clients develop self-awareness and emotional intelligence, enabling them to better understand their own desires and those of their partner. They provide guidance on effective communication techniques, conflict resolution, and exploring new ways to deepen emotional and physical intimacy.
In every committed marriage, intimacy and connection are the foundation for a fulfilling relationship. Join me as we delve into how small shifts and being uncompromising in your daily interactions can lead to profound and nourishing physical/emotional intimacy.
During each episode, we'll explore topics such as sexual intimacy, emotional awareness, and building an intimate connection that feels comfortable and authentic for you and your partner. I'll share practical advice and strategies to help you unlock the full potential of your relationship.
As "The Intimacy Doctor," I've helped countless couples transform their relationships and create a life filled with passion, purpose, and deep satisfaction. With over two decades of experience, I believe that true intimacy and success stem from being unapologetically yourself. Together, let's uncover the secrets to a juicy, nourishing, and intimate marriage.
—-----------
Download the first chapter of my bestselling book, “Uncompromising Intimacy,” here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=book
If you're ready to take your intimacy skills to the next level, explore my Aligned & Hot Marriage program. It's designed specifically for couples who refuse to settle for anything less than extraordinary love and connection. Visit https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/aligned-hot-marriage/?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ahm to learn more.
Join my email list to stay connected—it’s where I share my latest insights and offer opportunities for live Q & A: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=subscribe
—----------
WHAT DOES AN INTIMACY COACH DO?
An intimacy coach is a trained professional who specializes in helping individuals and couples cultivate deeper connections and enhance their intimate relationships. The role of an intimacy coach is to guide and support their clients in exploring various aspects of intimacy, including emotional, physical, and sexual intimacy.
Intimacy coaches create a safe and non-judgmental space for their clients to express their needs, desires, and concerns related to intimacy. An intimacy coach helps clients develop self-awareness and emotional intelligence, enabling them to better understand their own desires and those of their partner. They provide guidance on effective communication techniques, conflict resolution, and exploring new ways to deepen emotional and physical intimacy.
Episodes
Mentioned books
Apr 6, 2022 • 30min
68. Cultivate Curiosity
The first key to an intimate marriage is: Cultivate Curiosity. Early in a relationship, it’s easy to be curious about everything from scars, favorite foods, wild stories, spirituality and beyond. Then, as a relationship matures, the curiosity fades and you become more comfortable. You already know how they’ll order their coffee or how they’ll answer a question before you even ask. It’s beautiful to be so familiar and to free your energy to focus on other things. The problem is that when we become so comfortable and secure in this way, we end up missing out on the growth that we’re each going through. The drop in curiosity leads to being disconnected from one another’s internal experiences. Curiosity also helps when you’re in the middle of a conflict. If it’s intense, the most helpful thing you can do is to stop, take a breath, and ask a curious, open-ended question. Then listen to the answer with an open mind and an open heart. If you’re focused on being right, and no longer open to your partner’s point of view, it creates disconnection. On the other hand, when you cultivate curiosity, it builds collaboration, creativity, and connection. If you are currently in a phase of disconnection and distance in your relationship and/or having conflict, cultivate curiosity! Ask open-ended questions and then listen generously to the responses. If you’re in a strong, solid, connected relationship, it’s still essential to cultivate curiosity in order to make your relationship even stronger, and more joyful. If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com. Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy” https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage
Mar 30, 2022 • 23min
67. My Prescription for an Intimate Marriage
If you’re just joining the podcast now, I recommend going back to the beginning of Season 2 to gain some context for what I’m about to cover in this episode. We have an epidemic of conflict-free, passion-free relationships going on right now. My prescription for an intimate marriage evolved out of my medical training, years of experience coaching other couples, my own anecdotal research, and what I have learned in my own marriage. I have codified it all in the 6 Keys to an Intimate Marriage. They are: Cultivate Curiosity. Embrace Honesty. Be Kind. Choose Happiness. Take Responsibility. Seek Growth. I have seen these 6 keys work in many different kinds of relationships and many different kinds of situations. The results are wonderful! We’ll go into more depth with each of the keys in upcoming episodes. If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy” https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage
4 snips
Mar 23, 2022 • 23min
66. Stop Compromising!
Compromise is by far the most common relationship advice that’s given. In order to have a happy marriage you have to be good at compromising, right? Wrong! What really happens when you compromise is that you’re holding parts of yourself back from your relationship, and that doesn’t bode well. When you stop compromising and bring your entire self into your relationship, when you learn to accept all parts of one another, you will be able to create solutions that you couldn’t imagine on your own. Uncompromising intimacy is the opposite of compromise. It’s glorious, and it takes intentionality. The main reason to compromise is to avoid conflict, not rock the boat, and not mess with something that’s working well. There are many problems with this approach: Eventually, you get so skilled at compromise that you don’t even realize you’re doing it. You get so used to turning away from what you want, it becomes difficult to find your desires again. Unmet and uncommunicated desires often lead people to turn elsewhere. Uncompromising intimacy is the opposite of compromise. It’s glorious, connecting, and it takes intentionality. You’re not doing yourself any favors to compromise on your desires. The number 1 way to avoid divorce is to know what you want and know how to ask for it. Do you know what you want? Do you know what you desire within your relationship? Do you know how to bring it up in a way that’s respectful of the relationship? If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy” https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage
Mar 16, 2022 • 25min
65. New Lingerie Isn't Going To Help
Do you want to spend more time with your partner, believing it will contribute to you both feeling desire, and feeling desire for one another? Are you feeling numb, disconnected, and lacking the intimacy your marriage once had? Newsflash: going on a fancy vacation, getting new lingerie, getting your hair done, and/or losing a few pounds will NOT fix the problem. Those are short-term, external, temporary adjustments which won’t make a big difference. If you want to revive your connection, it’s necessary to make changes on the inside. Personal development, self-awareness, noticing when you’re being reactive, being more accepting of yourself and your partner–that’s what’ it takes to create the juicy connection and intimacy you’re looking for. What is it that creates happiness in relationships? What do you need to put your attention on in order to experience more happiness? Those are the questions I’m exploring in season 2 of The Intimate Marriage Podcast. Explore them with me by considering for yourself: What are your own thoughts about being happy in your relationship? What are your assumptions about how it works? What have you been telling yourself you need, in order to be happy? Once you identify the stories you’ve been telling yourself, it’s much easier to dismantle them and step into what you really need in order to enjoy your life. If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. “Uncompromising Intimacy” the book: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage
6 snips
Mar 9, 2022 • 19min
64. Stop Believing the Lies
If you’re having trouble in your relationship, it’s probably because you believe one of the prominent lies that are commonly accepted as de facto truth. If you’re not feeling the sexual chemistry you used to feel, very often people will believe they married the wrong person. More likely, you both just haven’t learned how to be with each other through each phase of your relationship. This is a learnable skill! If you’re treating your relationship as something transactional, doing something for your partner in the hopes that they’ll do something for you, it may work a little in the short term but that is not a long term solution. Are you doing things because you enjoy making your partner happy? Or are you doing things to get your partner to notice you and give you what you want? Stop compromising! If you want a passionate marriage, compromise is not the way to get there. Instead, bring all of who you are (your desires, emotions, thoughts, and feelings) to the relationship and stop diminishing yourself. If things are challenging in your relationship, that doesn’t mean you’re with the wrong person. It just means it’s time to grow, and learn how to be a better spouse to one another. If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage
Mar 2, 2022 • 16min
63. What Is An Intimate Marriage?
It’s fitting that I’m launching Season 2 on the day of my 26th wedding anniversary. Part of my celebration is to share with you what an intimate marriage really is. My mission is to change the cultural narrative that long-term relationships are where passions go to dwindle off and die. On the contrary, I want the collective world at large to see that in a long lasting relationship, there is the most tender, gratifying, expansive, vulnerable, delicious intimacy available. When I first got married, I was deeply in love and very happy but on the other hand, I was also convinced we would end up divorced and I mentally prepared myself for that inevitability. I didn’t believe that it could be fantastic for the long haul. Now, I absolutely believe that a fantastic relationship is possible, you just need to make a point of creating it. What happens when you create an intimate marriage? You’ll be happier You’ll have more professional success You’ll have the pleasure of being in a partnership where you’re both thriving Your children will learn how to create it for themselves We don’t know what the future holds, but we’re willing to lean in and discover it together. Email me at info@alexandrastockwell.com and let me know if this resonates for you! If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage Connect with Alexandra: IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach
Feb 16, 2022 • 16min
62. Valentine Bonus: Navigating Post-Valentine’s Fallout
I hope you had a really wonderful Valentine’s Day that was special, delicious, and sensual. I hope you were able to use what you learned in Episode 61 to connect with your partner. If it did not go as planned, this episode is for you! A client of mine has a wonderful relationship most of the time, but in February they fight and get on each other’s nerves a lot. They’ve come to dread February because of the pressure to have a “perfect” Valentine’s Day to match their wonderful marriage. If you’re feeling resentment or disappointment towards your partner, there are a few steps you can take in order to reconnect. Journal, exercise, meditate, find a way to clear the resentment so you can show up neutral and present Focus on what did go well Have a calm, respectful conversation with your partner about what happened Ask what your partner needs for this to be enjoyable, then share yours If you’d like, schedule a Valentine’s Day redo using what you’ve learned Email me at alexandra@alexandrastockwell.com and let me know if this resonates for you! If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage Connect with Alexandra: IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach A Podcast Launch Bestie production
Feb 14, 2022 • 14min
61. Valentine Bonus: A Valentine’s To Remember
Welcome to Part 2 of our Valentine Bonus Series! In the last episode we talked about setting yourself up for a great day. Now Valentine’s Day is here, and I want to talk about how to really enjoy the day, no matter what happens. Plan time to prep yourself. Not just getting dressed, but really relaxing with a hot bath, some meditation or yoga, or even a strip tease for yourself before the date. Look for opportunities to share with more depth, not just focusing on logistics and kids. The best conversations lead to the best sex! Share favorite “frames,” snapshots of meaningful moments, even as they’re happening. I hope you have a magnificent celebration and get to know yourself and your partner in new ways. I want to hear all about your plan, and how it turns out. Email me at info@alexandrastockwell.com and let me know! If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage Connect with Alexandra: IG: https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.facebook.com/alexandrastockwellcoach A Podcast Launch Bestie production
Feb 11, 2022 • 14min
60. Set Yourself Up Right for a Happy Valentine's Day
Valentine’s Day is often painted as a rosy, beautiful, romantic, fairytale time. Sometimes that’s true, but often it’s much more complicated. Today, I’ll share some ways to set yourself up for a Happy Valentine’s Day. This is not theoretical- it really will help! Spend some time thinking about what Valentine’s Day really means to you. Journal about it if you want. Notice if you are bracing yourself for a disappointing time? Are you fantasizing about a gorgeous romantic evening? Explore all of your dreams, disappointments, and other associations with the holiday. Envision what you want your Valentine’s Day to be like. How do you want to feel? What do you want to experience? Get together with your partner and reminisce with each other about Valentine’s Days in the past. Keep it light. Then talk together about how you both want to celebrate this year, and plan it together. Don’t expect your partner to read your mind! Take the time to create a win-win Valentine’s celebration for both of you. You’ll be glad you did. I want to hear all about your plan, and how it turns out. Email me at info@alexandrastockwell.com and let me know! If you’re ready to create the deliciousness and joy of a growth-oriented, passionate relationship, visit theintimatemarriagepodcast.com to get started. Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage Connect with Alexandra: IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business page: https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/
Jan 19, 2022 • 22min
59. How to Have a Happy Relationship
Today’s episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast marks the end of Season 1. As I look back at the richness of the season, it’s clear that there is no specific formula for a happy marriage. Each couple that I interviewed shared different things that contribute to their happiness. It’s a creative process unique to the individuals involved in terms of how they pursue and cultivate more joy, more pleasure, more connection, and more self-expression in their relationship. Listen as I highlight key moments from Season 1 and look ahead to Season 2! IN THIS EPISODE: [01:15] The rules, or lack thereof, for happy and unhappy families [04:06] Analogy: Teaching someone to fish and creating a fantastic marriage [06:58] Key takeaways from Season 1 couples [08:18] Taking risks in your relationship and tracking relationship goals [11:30] The connection between vulnerability and stress in marriage, and the importance of getting your children’s perspective about marriage and family [16:08] Prioritizing your partner’s experience and finding success in life and marriage despite the chaos around your [19:42] Reflection and looking forward to Season 2 KEY TAKEAWAYS: There is no specific formula for a happy and growing relationship. It's a creative process and unique to the individuals. It is intrinsically motivated and having a happy family is really a unique achievement. How we handle our money, especially in interacting with our spouse, is heavily influenced by emotional content that may not be completely clear to each other. It may feel obvious to us, but when you actually express it to your partner, it will ease miscommunication and frustration. You can totally love and support your spouse without being interested in the things that they are interested in. Links Mentioned: Read Alexandra’s book “Uncompromising Intimacy”: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Join THE INTIMATE MARRIAGE Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hotmarriage Follow Alexandra: IG: @alexandra.stockwell.intimacy - https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/alexandra.stockwell.7 FB business: https://www.instagram.com/alexandra.stockwell.intimacy/
