Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

When kids hit thirteen they often become highly emotional. What happens in the brain and the body during this time? Dr. Lisa explains and also talks about the process of "separation-individuation" where young people seek to define their own identities - often by being hard on their folks.Parents sometimes assume that age thirteen is the beginning of adolescence. But is it really? And how can you help a tween or teen who's having an emotional meltdown? Dr. Lisa has good news: the intensity of early adolescence doesn’t last forever and there are effective things parents can do to manage bumpy moments with their teen.BOOK GIVEAWAY: 14 Talks By Age 14: The Essential Conversations You Need to Have with Your Kids Before They Start High School; by Michelle IcardEnter to win one of 3 books being given away by @asklisapodcast.1. Follow us on Instagram and/or Facebook @asklisapodcast2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook)3. Enter as many times as you'd like4. For U.S. residents only(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 2/15/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.)See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

How do you get kids to understand the importance of hygiene? A mom writes in that her son is making life unbearable at home because he refuses to take regular showers since he has spent much of the year learning remotely. Dr. Lisa explains the concept of habituation - the process of growing accustomed to sensory input - and discusses with Reena the science behind sensation and perception. Lisa offers strategies to help kids understand why they can't smell themselves and gives guidance on when, as a parent, it's time to lay down the law. Reena and Lisa also talk about the sweet smell of success. Reena’s Tampa Bay Buccaneers made it to the Super Bowl. What life lessons can Tom Brady and Gronk teach us from the football field?Lisa's 1/29/29 article in The New York Times: Helping a Teen Who Is Angry About House Rules on CovidBOOK GIVEAWAY: Dr. Cara Natterson's books on puberty: "The Care & Keeping of You" (Book 1 for younger girls & Book 2 for older girls) and "Guy Stuff." Enter to win one set of all 3 books being given away by @asklisapodcast.1. Follow us on Instagram and/or Facebook @asklisapodcast2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook)3. Enter as many times as you'd like4. For U.S. residents only(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 2/8/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.)Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinanSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

A single mom writes in feeling worried because her daughter is questioning her gender. Dr. Lisa explains what we understand about gender identity and sexual orientation, and offers advice on what to do when you are at an impasse with your child. Parents often feel they need to drive the bus on getting to a desired outcome, but that's not usually the best approach. Lisa and Reena talk about how to think with your child about complex and delicate topics, and Lisa explains what teenagers really respect in adults. She also discusses research she uncovered about the parent-child relationship while writing Untangled that might surprise you.Lisa's 10/7/20 book review in The New York Times: 'Tomboy’ Looks at Gender Roles, and Role-Playing, Through the AgesBOOK GIVEAWAY:Dr. Lisa Damour’s “Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood.”Enter to win one of 3 copies being given away by @asklisapodcast.1. Follow us on Instagram and/or Facebook @asklisapodcast2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook)3. Enter as many times as you'd like4. For U.S. residents only(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 2/1/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.)Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinanSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It’s not always easy to be the grownup in the room. What are the teachable moments for our children as we watch alarming events unfold in Washington DC?How do you move beyond intense polarization? Lisa talks about research conducted by social psychologist, Henri Tajfel, who survived WW II only because his German captors never discovered that he was Jewish. Tajfel explains how the Nazis are not so different from us. How does his research apply to present day and the recent Capitol Hill riots?How do you help kids see when they’re dehumanizing other people? Reena asks about radicalization online and cancel culture. Lisa explains how you can help your family work against discrimination and prejudice.Lisa's 1.7.20 article in The New York Times: Parenting While ShockedBOOK GIVEAWAY:New York Times personal finance columnist Ron Lieber's new book publishes next week! Enter to win one of 3 copies being given away by @asklisapodcast.1. Follow us on Instagram and/or Facebook @asklisapodcast2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook)3. Enter as many times as you'd like4. For U.S. residents only(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 1/25/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners directly from the publisher.)Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinanSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Parents are finding it hard to get their children to feel motivated about school, especially when they are learning remotely. Dr. Lisa explains strategies that might help and how parents can help kids keep the academic train on its tracks. Lisa and Reena talk about supporting children for whom school is an uphill battle, even under normal conditions, and what parents should do if they are the ones who feel like they are drowning. Reena talks about the emotional experience she had selling an old sofa and how it put into perspective the struggle many parents are going through.For Children Everywhere - UNICEF works in 180 different countries and territories to save children’s lives and protect their rights.https://www.unicef.org/Join us this Friday, Jan 15th, 2021 at 3pm EST on Instagram Live @asklisapodcast. We will be taking your parenting questions live!Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast @LDamour @ReenaNinan Sent from my iPhoneSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Lisa and Reena kick off the new year with a look at positive psychology. What is it and how exactly does it work? How do you stay positive when things aren’t rosy? Reena asks about the psychology of manifesting. Does it really work? They also look at sadness and happiness. Lisa shares why the two emotions don't cancel each other out but, instead, often live side by side. In other words, the presence of negative does not mean the absence of positive. Lisa explains that what psychologists call "pleasure scheduling" can help boost mood and also covers the critical importance of our personal running narratives - or "self-talk."For Children Everywhere - Brain & Behavior Research Foundation is the nation’s top non-governmental founder of mental health research grants to scientists. Www.BBRFoundation.orgAdditional resources:https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced byWww.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast @LDamour @ReenaNinanSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

When can your kids get vaccinated? If my child has recovered from Covid-19, how long does immunity last? How do you know when it’s really safe to send your kids back to school? Lisa and Reena get answers to key medical questions about kids and Covid-19 with special guest expert, pediatrician Dr. Cara Natterson. CARA NATTERSON, MD, is a pediatrician who has been helping schools with Covid-19 health and safety plans and a New York Times bestselling author of puberty and parenting books. Dr. Natterson pens a weekly newsletter about the intersection of science, parenting, and the coronavirus. Learn more about Dr. Natterson and subscribe to her newsletter at www.worryproofmd.com.For Children Everywhere - The American Lung Association supports your breath through education, advocacy and groundbreaking research. With COVID-19, the lung disease that has stopped the world, support to the Lung Association is needed now more than ever. Donate at www.lung.orgTalk to your child about vaping with the American Lung Association's Get Your Head Out of the Cloud conversation guide. Lisa was honored to help develop the conversation guide in collaboration with the American Lung Association.Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast @LDamour @ReenaNinanSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

We like to think that time can heal a lot, but when do we need to worry about the pandemic's lasting impact on our children? Lisa introduces us to the concept of “ordinary magic” - protective processes that happen at home which can shield children from persistently difficult circumstances. Lisa and Reena discuss the research on resilience and what it teaches us about kids who thrive during hardship and how parents can help.Resources on resiliency:Check out Reena’s show on YouTube “The Rebound” for stories of how people have made it out of their hardest moments @itstherebound: bit.ly/381xcAf“Ordinary Magic” a book by psychologist Dr. Ann Masten. https://www.guilford.com/books/Ordinary-Magic/Ann-Masten/9781462523719/reviewsFor Children Everywhere - Blessings in a Backpack mobilizes communities, individuals, and resources to provide food for elementary school children across America who might otherwise go hungry. Donate at www.blessingsinabackpack.orgAdditional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcastSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

What’s the limit for children socializing online? Many kids use social media to connect with their friends and as an escape from the monotony of this pandemic. Lisa walks us through the pros and cons of being online - from when getting lost in distractions can be a good thing to when digital technology can be detrimental to a child’s development. Lisa and Reena unpack the research on how best to take a break, especially when our kids (or we!) need to give the body a rest from stress hormones or clear out mental clutter. The episode wraps up by answering a critical question: When is it time to be concerned about our kids' online social activity?For Children Everywhere - Crisis Text Line is free 24/7 support for those in crisis. Text 741 741 from anywhere in the US to reach a trained crisis counselor. www.crisistextline.orgLisa’s most recent NYT column: How Teens Use Downtime to Connect, Distract or ReflectAdditional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcastSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

How do you approach your child when you know they may be struggling but won’t open up? Lisa shares what she learned when she asked teens why they sometimes clam up around their parents. Lisa and Reena consider how much parents really need to know about the details of their kid's lives and the different ways to support children and help them process their emotions, even when they play their cards close to their chests. For parents who feel that their kid broke up with them, how do you regain their trust? When should you really start to worry?For Children Everywhere - KIVA crowd funds loans for businesses in over 80 countries. The borrowers have a 96% repayment rate. Once repayment is made, you can resend again to someone else. One hundred percent of the money you give goes straight to funding the loans.Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.comBe sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcastSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.