

NOBODY LIKES ONIONS
Patrick Melton
For over FIFTEEN YEARS, Nobody Likes Onions has been making audiences laugh at the absurd, the obvious, and the wrong. Comedian Patrick Melton, along with other entertainers from around the world, gather around microphones three times a week to present their unique observations and opinions about current events, pop culture, and real-world experiences in their personal lives.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Oct 15, 2025 • 4h 48min
October 15, 2025: Content Buffet! Richard Leland Neal Returns! GEANU As DUMB As Ever! P.O. Box!
Patrick has been running around putting out fires in places you don’t even want to know about! Today we jump back in to some favorites we haven’t talked about in awhile, from Richard Leland Neal to Crazy Joe to Tony Michael Johns – worker! Keanu and Geno are back at rock-bottom viewer numbers and we take a look at why people don’t seem to be digging their nontent! Aaron Imholte gets some bad news about his upcoming jail sentence for his conviction on revenge porn charges. We dive in to the P.O. Box to see what disasters have been mailed to Patrick! Plus some new stuff if there’s time!

Oct 8, 2025 • 5h 46min
October 8, 2025: Failed Comedian CHAD ZUMOCK Is CRASHING! Steel Toe Continues SPIRALING In Cope!
Chad Zumock is having a rough life. After being rejected by his mother, father, stepfather, women everywhere, his radio career, Los Angeles comedians, New York comedians, Florida comedians, podcasting associates, several co-hosts and guests, and comedy bookers worldwide, he’s having a bit of a FEELING day. Watch as we unpack Chad’s latest meltdown, brought on by his last-resort style show which focuses on making fun of more talented and successful podcasters and lashing out at chat participants for no reason at all. Convicted revenge pr0nographer Aaron Imholte is still reeling from his major L last week in court, and the spin is at an all-time high!

Oct 7, 2025 • 3h 50min
October 6, 2025: Chad Zumock Being Chad Zumock! Keanu & Geno Are As DUMB As They Come!
Another month of the Dabbleverse brings another month of the same idiots doing the same old stuff they always do! Chad is busy trying to ruin other people’s gigs to somehow elevate the sad remnants of his sad little comedy career. Keanu and Geno are being as redacted as usual, blissfully unaware that they are the laughing stocks of this entire segment of the internet and not understanding anything that’s happening around them. ichard Leland Neal is claiming that Patrick has made threats on his life and is trying to get the entire NLO YouTube channel nuked.

Oct 3, 2025 • 3h 26min
THIS LITTLE PIGGY: A Steel Toe Conviction Show! (October 3, 2025)
Aaron Imholte is now a convicted revenge pornographer and has been sentenced to serve 15 days in the county jail. Of course the spin from Aaron began almost immediately, and the dullest amongst us have started getting it wrong. You can count on TLP for accurate information and analysis in a sea of Kikis and Genos getting it all wrong! Join Patrick, Tookie, Karl from Who Are These Podcasts? and Moody as they discuss the hilarity of the week from Aaron Imholte and his Steel Toe Morning Show. The man who refuses to get a job never ceases to captivate while ratcheting up his lies and sperg-sessions for our amusement.

Sep 30, 2025 • 5h 27min
September 30, 2025: STEEL TOE Sentencing! KARMICX Lies Exposed & Relationship Crash Out!
Aaron Imholte is headed back to court this morning, and many people are sure to be covering what happens with the pretend radio man as one of his legal battles possibly comes to an end. With new charges dropping on Monday, it’s likely that this isn’t going to go well for our little Mooby. Let’s hear your predictions and see the fallout live! It’s been just a couple of months since KarmicX met and fell for his love, Felicia Gillespie, and the small town Minnesota boy is really going through it. Let’s watch the unraveling of a real man over the past couple of days and speculate what might be happening next between the Dabbleverse’s most toxic couple after lies get exposed to the audience.

Sep 26, 2025 • 5h 11min
OLD BOOT GOOFIN’! A Steel Toe Retrospective Show!
Join Patrick and Moody as they discuss everything Steel Toe Morning Show used to be and what Aaron Imholte has become today.

Sep 24, 2025 • 4h 41min
September 24, 2025: Karmic Get ANGRY At Life! Kiki Can’t Win! Steel Toe’s LEGAL WOES!
Karmic is having a meltdown now that he’s back in his simple home in his simple town with his simple life. A grown man yelling and screaming at inanimate objects, a software company, and the sky is not a becoming trait that women seek when pursuing a partner. Keanu C. Thompson takes the torch from Aaron Imholte. patting herself on the back for breaking up the Pretty Antisocial duo by fabricating a world where she is good at things. Aaron makes some moves in the court system and continues to delude himself. But will it pay off in the long run for the serum-sucking beta?

Sep 22, 2025 • 4h 15min
September 22, 2025: Bower Gets Dark! Can Lemmi Fly Solo? KarmicX Will Be WRECKED!
KarmicX is home and the dopamine from his time with mid witch Felicia Gillespie is making him question his entire life as he tries to get clean for her. Joey C lets his wife perform a wedding in their living room and it gives viewers quite a lot to behold. Lemmi and Granny, pseudo-stars of the Dabbleverse have split up and Granny seems very bitter about it. Michael Ray Bower makes some distressing statements in his latest cry for help video. Patrick gets an email from Richard Leland Neal and it isn’t clear that he is open and receptive to assistance from the Onionverse at this time.

Sep 20, 2025 • 5h 11min
THE VIEW: We Just Watchin’ Over Here!
Karmic Karmic Karmic Karmic Karmic Chameleon! You come and go! You can’t come and almost never go anywhere! Let’s get to watchin’! Richard Leland Neal calls in.

Sep 19, 2025 • 7h 13min
THIS LITTLE PIGGY: September 19, 2025
Join Patrick, Karl from Who Are These Podcasts? and Moody as they discuss the hilarity of the week from Aaron Imholte and his Steel Toe Morning Show. The man who refuses to get a job never ceases to captivate while ratcheting up his lies and sperg-sessions for our amusement.


