Life Coaching with Christine Hassler

This episode is about taking a stand for what we value. Today’s caller, Sebastian, is not getting his needs met in his relationship. He is attempting to talk through his issues, but the results are not changing. We discuss ways to get clarification from his partner about what she needs and how he can have his needs met by taking a stand for his values.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode315]   If communication solved every issue in a relationship, we could all just read communication books and have the most amazing relationships, friendships, and parental relationships. Everything would be easy. But, it is not. We need to do the inner work. We play out our childhood stuff in our adult life, especially in relationships.   When a child has emotionally unavailable parents, they learn to tolerate a lot more hurt. When they grow into adults, they may have a pattern of thinking things are better than they truly are in their intimate relationships.   In relationships, friendships, or any kind of intimate relationship, we often love and give in the way we want to be given to and loved, not necessarily the way that person needs or wants it.   We have to be bold when it comes to things like love, our families, our health, our well-being, and what is important to us. We must take a stand for our values.   Join us for our LIVE Inner Child Workshop on October 8–10th. It will be the last live inner child workshop taught by Christine and Stefanos for a while. Get live coaching or attend the workshop online ChristineHassler.com/InnerChild.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you find yourself not being a firm stand for what you want in your life? Do you ever tiptoe around people afraid of upsetting them? Do you often feel disrespected in conversations or just not heard? Do you have some codependent patterns and let people walk all over you? Do you often find yourself with emotionally unavailable or avoidant-type people?   Sebastian’s Question: Sebastian feels he doesn’t get his needs met in his relationship and would like guidance on how to have a healthier relationship.   Sebastian’s Key Insights and Ahas: His relationship has ups and downs. Hurtful things are said between him and his partner. He and his partner have done couple counseling. He has a 10-year-old son with his partner. He feels disrespected by his partner. He loves his family. His partner finds it is overwhelming to deal with his emotions. He is trying to uncover and overcome the relationship issues. He is codependent.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Get curious about what his partner needs. Have a conversation about what each other needs emotionally. Stand in his strong, healthy masculine and ask his partner if she wants the relationship to work. Step into his power and take a stand for himself and the relationship.   Takeaways: Take a stand for your values. Be very clear about what you want and where you are going.   Sponsor: SOUL CBD — is a daily supplement to calm the nervous system and re-calibrate homeostasis. Soul CBD gummies, liquids, oils, topicals, and bath bombs are all 3rd-party-tested for toxins. Bring balance into your life and get 15% off AND free shipping in the U.S. at MySoulCBD.com/OVERIT   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

If you ever struggle with anxiety, worry or even depression, do NOT miss this episode.  One of the leading voices in personal development and transformation and an international bestselling author Mel Robbins joins Christine and gives a TON of soothing and practical advice for creating more calm in your life. Mel's work includes the global phenomenon The 5 Second Rule, the upcoming The High 5 Habit, four #1 bestselling audiobooks, the #1 podcast on Audible, as well as signature online courses that have changed the lives of more than half a million students worldwide.  Her groundbreaking work on behavior change has been translated into 36 languages and is used by healthcare professionals, veterans’ organizations, and the world’s leading brands to inspire people to be more confident, effective, and fulfilled. As one of the most widely booked and followed public speakers in the world, Mel coaches more than 60 million people online every month and videos featuring her work have more than a billion views online, including her TEDx talk, which is one of the most popular of all time. There’s nothing Mel loves more than making a real difference in people’s lives by teaching them to believe in themselves and inspiring them to take the actions that will change their lives. Mel lives in New England with her husband of 25 years and their three kids, but she is and will always be a Midwesterner at heart.

This episode will support you in getting through and to the other side of any kind of loss. Today’s caller, Regina, is a widow who is grieving over the loss of her husband. She says she regrets not being the best mother in the world and not living the life she wanted to live. She is questioning her purpose and experiencing quite a bit of apathy in her life.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode314]   Loss is an incredibly painful but inevitable part of our life. When it happens it is important we give ourselves time to grieve and not try to be strong and move on right away. But there comes a point in our life when life has to go on.   Whether it is the death of a loved one, a pet, a relationship, or a job, we can’t allow loss to suck the life out of us. Otherwise, we end up existing, not truly living. We honor those who transition by continuing to live.   People who deal with expectation hangovers often feel guilty to admit it but they tend to be apathetic to life. The reason for the apathy is the opposite of love is not hate. It is indifference or apathy. When we go through something challenging, especially if we are lonely through it, we allow our self-love tank to get so low that we slip into indifference. Without love there is apathy. Getting out of it requires choosing to live, not just to go through the motions; we need something we want to live for.   Give yourself permission to live for and find something that reconnects you back to love.   Consider/Ask Yourself: Have you recently been through a loss and can’t seem to move on? Have you been through a loss and are aware you need time to grieve? Do you tend to look back on your life and wish you could have done things differently? Are you at a point in your life where you are just existing and need to start living again?   Regina’s Question: Regina would like to move past her sadness and regret of not living the life she wanted.   Regina’s Key Insights and Ahas: She is approaching retirement. She is not in the place she thought she would be in her life. She lives alone. There is a part of her that doesn’t want to be anymore. She has regrets about how she raised her children. She doesn’t believe we get more than one love in our lives. Her husband was her best friend. She beats herself up a lot. She knows if she can create a negative story for herself, she is capable of creating a positive story, too.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Choose to create a future that is enlivening. Give herself permission to live and allow love in. Have a loving relationship with herself. Speak to herself as a loving mother would to a child. Forgive herself for being mean to herself. Write out some promises to herself.   Takeaways: Practice self-love. Consider that loved ones who have transitioned are angels and guides in your life. Accept that you did the best you could with the tools you had at the time. Content that focuses on overcoming regret.   Sponsor: THIRDLOVE — Delivers life-changing comfort for your body with high-quality underwear, sleep, and loungewear. Check out their new seamless Form line. Visit the Fitting Room and take the quiz at Thirdlove.com/overit to find your perfect bra size and style. They have over 80 bra sizes, including half-cup sizes, and great-fitting, comfy loungewear! Use the link to get 20% off the first purchase of your new favorite Seamless wireless bra or loungewear. They have a 100% fit guarantee.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Gay Hendricks has been a leader in the fields of relationship transformation and body mind transformation for more than 45 years. After earning his Ph.D. fromStanford in 1974, Gay served as Professor of Counseling Psychology at the University of Colorado for 21 years. He has written more than 40 books, including bestsellers such as Five Wishes, The Big Leap, Conscious Loving and Conscious Loving Ever After, (the last two co-authored with his co-author and mate for more than 35 years, Dr. Kathlyn Hendricks). He is also a mystery novelist, with a series of five books featuring the Tibetan-Buddhist private detective, Tenzing Norbu, as well as a new mystery series featuring a Victorian-era London detective, Sir ErrolHyde. His latest book, Conscious Luck, reveals eight ways to change your fortune through the power of intention. Gay has appeared on more than 500 radio andtelevision shows, including Oprah, CNN, CNBC, 48 HOURS and others. His new book, The Genius Zone, was published in June, 2021.

This episode is about learning the tools to deal with triggers and the avoidant attachment style. This week’s caller, Mike, would like guidance on how to be more open-hearted and vulnerable in his intimate relationships. This session will be of service to those who have an avoidant style and for those who attract Avoidants. We discuss how to understand them and how not to take their actions personally.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode313]   Anything is healable. It doesn’t matter what is in your background, childhood, or past. I’ve seen it over and over again. Does it happen overnight? No. Is it always easy? No. Is it going to change overnight? Healable doesn’t mean we go from having an avoidant attachment style to being totally open-hearted, totally secure, and never having triggers.   Healing is not being perfect, not being free of any triggers but really learning how to work with those triggers, manage those triggers, so that they don’t become roadblocks in our life. Triggers can be alarm systems for growth and not a dead end. Awareness is not enough to heal.   People with an avoidant attachment style are not trying to avoid being close or being in love. They are trying to avoid rejection, hurt, and pain. When we are with an Avoidant, and they pull away or put walls up, it can make us feel as if we have done something wrong. But, we cannot take it personally. If you are with an Avoidant, the best thing you can do when they are triggered is don’t attack them, don’t tell them they are doing anything wrong, then reassure them that you are there and you love them.   On September 14th, Christine and Stefanos will teach a virtual group call at 5 pm PST.   Join us for our LIVE Inner Child Workshop on October 8‒10th. It will be the last live inner child workshop taught by Christine and Stefanos for a while. Get live coaching or attend the workshop online ChristineHassler.com/InnerChild.   Mike’s Question: Mike would like guidance on how to be more open-minded and open-hearted when approaching his relationships.   Mike’s Key Insights and Ahas: His marriage of 12 years recently ended. He emotionally shut down in his relationships. He has an insecure attachment style. Fear of rejection keeps him from being vulnerable. He was not loved for being himself as a child. He is self-aware. He feels as if his personal development work has stalled. He does not want to repeat the mistakes of his past. He is ready to date again. He has high standards. He puts walls up to protect himself. He struggles to be vulnerable. He feels he can apply the practical guidance.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Acknowledge himself for the personal development work he is doing. Start dating again. Lean into vulnerability. Accept himself for who he is. Have compassion for himself and his fear. It is okay to be scared.   Takeaways: On the field is the best way to get good at a game. We cannot run from hurt. We have to expose ourselves to triggers so we can integrate and deal with hurt and fear.   Sponsor: SOUL CBD — is a daily supplement to calm the nervous system and re-calibrate homeostasis. Soul CBD gummies, liquids, oils, topicals, and bath bombs are all 3rd-party-tested for toxins. Bring balance into your life and get 15% off AND free shipping in the U.S. at MySoulCBD.com/OVERIT   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

The feeling of being in love is the best. Not to mention the blissful feeling of certainty when we feel like you’ve met “the one” (finally!). You start fantasizing about the future and are convinced that the other person is on the same page you are. And then it ends. And you are not only heartbroken, but shocked because it seemed so right and you don’t understand what went wrong. I know that is not comforting if you are in the pain of a break-up, but understanding why the one you thought was going to be forever ended may offer you some relief. This Coaches Corner will help!

This episode is about stepping into your purpose and fulfilling your dreams. This week’s caller, Mike, thinks his problem is complex, but it’s not. His constant search of products and materials leads him to believe his next steps need to come from outside of himself. We discuss how he may be stalling by continuing to do research instead of listening to his internal inspiration and moving forward.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode312]   Dreams or anything we long for; the dreams we feel in our heart are different from the kinds of dreams we hope will make us feel better about ourselves, or fill a void. Those are ego-based desires. But, listening inside to hear our heartfelt dreams is part of our psychic ability. And, we are all a little psychic or intuitive.   We don’t long for something if we don’t feel that it is coming. If we have a premonition, on some level our dreams are already coming to fruition. We cannot control the exact timing of it. If we feel it and we want it, it may take a week or ten years because it takes time for dreams to evolve.   What stalls a lot of people from really stepping into sharing their gift, or serving people in a greater way, is they think they have to be perfect. To achieve our dreams, we just need to be honest, vulnerable, and committed, not perfect.   We have all the answers inside; we just need to take time to question ourselves and answer.   Consider/Ask Yourself What heartfelt dreams are calling you forward? Do you have a sense of what you want to do but are not taking action? Do you start a lot of projects but do not follow them through to completion? Are you waiting for some kind of answer or sign from the universe to make a decision?   Mike’s Question: Mike has a dream of becoming an entrepreneur but he lacks confidence in his decision-making process. He would like to break the cycle of never moving forward.   Mike’s Key Insights and Ahas: He wants to be an entrepreneur. He put his dream on hold when his daughter was born. He is always looking for the next big thing. He gets easily redirected. He lacks confidence in his decision-making process. He is a Preacher and motivator. He is good at inspiring others. He wants to make a difference in other people’s lives. He is in a cycle of frustration.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Let his inspiration drive his next steps. Let God use him as an instrument. Write his life experience resume. Meditate and recognize his unique gifts. Start with his big vision and work backward.   Takeaways: Write a life experience resume. Re-orient towards an internal direction. Listen to your own inner wisdom. Try it for thirty days. Answer these questions: Who am I here to serve? What can I offer? How can I deliver it?   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

If you ever compare yourself to anyone else, this episode is for you! Learn the difference between healthy and toxic comparison and how to form closer connections when comparison is gone. Melissa Ambrosini is the bestselling author of Comparisonitis, Mastering Your Mean Girl, Open Wide, and the Audible Original PurposeFULL as well as the winner of ‘The Best eBooks Of All Time’ as voted by Book Depository.    Melissa is the host of #1 rated podcast The Melissa Ambrosini Show, where she shares her wisdom and interviews with the biggest thought leaders and experts in the world to help her audience unlock their full potential and live their dream life.    When Melissa isn’t writing books and recording her podcast she is speaking on stages, teaching and creating online programs, meditations and life changing live events.   With a deep commitment to empowering others to become the best version of themselves, Melissa believes that awakening is possible for everyone. She strives to inspire others to reclaim their power, step into their truth, live with intention, and move in the direction of their dreams.

This episode is about making empowered decisions and changes with integrity. Today’s caller, Anne, is questioning whether or not she should leave her 25-year marriage. She feels she has tried to communicate her needs. We work through how she is communicating and whether or not she is being vulnerable enough to make an empowered decision.   [For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode311]   Often, in masculine-feminine dynamics, it requires the feminine dropping into a deep vulnerability with no victim, no blame, no anger, no reason, just an open, heart-baring, soul truth that ignites the masculine to look within so it can open up.   When we are too much in hopelessness-helpless, when we are too much in victim, the only answer seems to be to get out of a situation because we don’t feel empowered.   One of the ways we get empowered is to look at our side of things and then we communicate vulnerably, because we are not empowered when we communicate emotionally, reactively, or with blame or neediness.   And remember, vulnerability is different than a victimy emotional reaction. It has a different frequency and people can hear us when we are vulnerable. They can’t hear us when we are emotional or blaming them. It puts their defenses up. They can’t hear the truth and intimacy of what we are saying when they are defensive.   Consider/Ask Yourself Are you torn about what to do in a relationship? Do you want to stay? Do you want to go? Do you tend to look at what someone else is doing wrong and all the ways that they’re not meeting your needs and maybe don’t look quite enough at how you’re perpetuating it? Are you aware of what your needs are? Are you good at communicating your needs? Do you feel in your gut that you just want to do something but you just can’t take the action?   Anne’s Question: Anne is struggling with the decision to stay in her marriage.   Anne’s Key Insights and Ahas: She has been married for 25 years and has four children with her husband. She feels she and her husband have grown apart. Her husband says he wants to make the marriage work. Her husband’s job and commitments took a lot of his time. She asked him to take more time with her and the children. She collected evidence of the ways he wasn’t showing up for the marriage. She doesn’t know if she still loves him. Fear may be driving her choice. There is some part of her that may be shut down. She wants to be loved by him.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Continue to have vulnerable conversations with her husband. Drop into her feminine vulnerability. Consider where she may have walls up around her heart. Use “I” language, not “you” language. Write out her fears, desires, and insecurities and read them to her husband.   Takeaways: If there is something you are looking at that you think is wrong and you just need to get out, consider where the decision is coming from. Are you empowered? Have you been vulnerable? Have you looked inside yourself to see if you are mad or blaming? Do you feel like a victim and feel like the only decision is to leave?   Sponsor: Organifi — has organic superfood blends that offer trusted plant-based nutrition. They are convenient and delicious. Many of us have the time or means to get the natural, fresh, organic vegetables we need. Upgrade your nutrition every single day with Organifi Gold, Organifi Vitamin C packs, or Green or Red Juice. For 20% off your order, go to Organifi.com/overit and use the code “OVERIT” at checkout to receive 20% off all products.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Males who want to be on the show Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show. Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.

Brandy Gillmore, PhD in natural medicine, is a world-renowned mind/body energy expert who is well known for her discoveries in self-healing and working with the power of the mind to get tangible results. Her breakthrough work has been featured in an award-winning documentary and various docuseries. Brandy speaks on stages around the world and has also given a mind-expanding TEDx talk. Brandy’s expertise in self-healing originated from her own devastating accident that left her disabled and living in excruciating pain despite being on multiple medications, including morphine.  When doctors told Brandy there was nothing they could do, she became determined to find a solution. After  years of trial and error, she was able to make incredible discoveries with the mind that ultimately enabled her to heal herself. Today she uses these same discoveries to help others also get radical life-changing results. Today, Brandy works with top celebrities, Olympic athletes, CEOs, entrepreneurs, and groups worldwide sharing her leading-edge discoveries. Her goal is to help advance traditional research to bridge the gap between science and spirituality.   You can register for her free video event "Reprogram Your Subconscious Mind for Positivity, Healing & Successful Manifestation" here: https://christinehassler.com/reprogram