Buddhism Beyond Belief with Susan Piver

In today’s episode, I take a deep dive into the meditation questions I’ve been asked the most over the past three decades—as a student, as a teacher, and now, as someone who teaches others to teach.We talk about the real stuff. The messy, wonderful, confusing, luminous questions that arise when you sit down on your cushion and meet your own mind.Highlights:“Why can’t I stop thinking?” You’re not supposed to. That’s not a failure—it’s reality. Thoughts are not the enemy.“Why do we keep our eyes open during practice?” Eyes open helps us stay here, in this life, not some special spiritual realm. We’re not retreating. We’re engaging—with softness and awareness.“I feel like I’m hyperventilating… or I’m weirdly obsessed with my breath or eyes—what’s happening?” You’re just noticing more. That wide open space you’ve created isn’t empty—it’s your awareness. And yes, it’ll settle.“What if I have a really good idea during meditation?” The real answer is: call it thinking, let go, return to the breath. But… I also share my (slightly quirky) workaround involving my thumbs.“Can meditation help with depression, anxiety, or trauma?” This is an important and delicate topic. Meditation is not a cure-all, and it is essential to proceed gently, and ideally with guidance from a trusted healthcare provider.“I’m overwhelmed by feelings when I meditate. Isn’t this supposed to calm me down?” Not always. Sometimes the most compassionate choice is to not meditate. Or to gently make your feeling—rather than your breath—the object of attention.“How do I know if I’m doing it right?” Because, let’s face it, it feels boring. But the answer is not on the cushion—it’s in your life. Are you more kind? More patient? More real? Then yes, you’re doing it right.For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

In this episode, I explore a classical teaching throughout the Buddhist world, The Four Reminders, also known as the Four Thoughts that Turn the Mind to the Dharma. When I first heard them, I thought how can I forget what I just heard?! Turns out, I can’t. Warning: once you hear them, you can’t unhear them either. They are at once brutal and deeply compassionate. Much like life itself. Highlights:The Four Thoughts are uncomfortable but essential contemplations that help you see with what truly matters. They are:Precious Human Birth – It's rare and valuable simply to be here. If one person in your line had done something different, you would not be you!Impermanence and Death – Death is real (but only 100% of the time) and comes without warning.Karma is real – Actions have results, whether or not in this lifetime.Samsara is an ocean of unavoidable suffering. Sure, there are also great things, but even they come with suffering because they all eventually dissolve.Remembering these truths can turn your mind toward wisdom, compassion, and a life of generosity.Even if you don't identify as Buddhist, these reflections can offer clarity in how to live more deliberately and kindly.With personal stories and my best insights, I hope to share how remembering these truths can shift your priorities and bring you back to what matters most.For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

Discover the intriguing balance between egolessness and self-awareness in spirituality. Explore how meditation unveils both our true essence and the illusion of self. The Enneagram emerges as a powerful tool for personal growth, offering insights into personality types that enhance self-compassion. Learn how understanding stress responses influences your relationships, fostering communication and harmony. This journey highlights that knowing ourselves is essential to spiritual development, not a distraction from it.

In a chaotic world, feeling powerless is common, but small changes can empower you. Start by tidying your space; a clean environment brings clarity and elegance. Choose clothes you love to wear, fostering self-respect each morning. Prioritize quality food and enjoy the preparation process, treating yourself kindly. Finally, surround yourself with people who see your true worth, minimizing time with those who don't uplift you. Embrace these suggestions to cultivate confidence and strength from within.

In this episode, I take a deep dive into a topic that a lot of people (myself included) find confusing; what does it mean to be egoless? Drawing from my 30+ years of experience, I share my own issues with the call to transcend ego within the Western cultural backdrop of individualism, shame, and self-judgment.Key Points:"Ego as the enemy" can reinforce cultural self-shaming:  Broadly speaking, we are wired to monitor, scrutinize and “fix” our flaws and mitigate our failings. This kind of self-focus in our culture makes it easy to see so-called ego as a problem to solve and our very own self as an obstacle on the journey.Relating to our wounds and pursuing spiritual insight are not mutually exclusive:  Both are essential and can coexist.Meditation fosters receptivity, not self-improvement: Rather than fall into the trap of using meditation to solve your problems, allow your practice to make the space for the wisdom that’s already a part of you. It will arise naturally.Egolessness is about openness, not self-denial: Genuine egolessness is not about prioritizing everyone else and abandoning yourself entirely. Our practice of letting go, being present; this is more helpful when it comes to realizing egolessness. It’s not about forcing yourself out; rather, it’s about being with what is (you are a part of what is) and receiving the love, wisdom, and insight that reveal rather than force egolessness. For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

In this episode, I share my personal adaptation of Buddhist principles for relationships, "The Four Noble Truths of Love." Drawing from my own 26-year marriage and moments of deep disconnection, I talk about how Buddhist wisdom helped me navigate challenges. Key Points include:Love Affairs vs. Relationships: There is a fundamental difference between love affairs (characterized by romance, intensity, desire, and perhaps some drama) and relationships (characterized by intimacy, closeness, deep knowing, and sometimes irritation).The Buddha’s Four Noble TruthsLife is suffering/unsatisfyingGrasping causes sufferingThere is a cessation of sufferingThe Noble Eightfold PathThe Four Noble Truths of Love (made up by me)Relationships never stabilize (what?!)Thinking they should stabilize creates instabilityMeeting the instability together is loveViewing all disconnects (barring abuse of any kind)  as ways to deepen intimacy helpsFor more on this topic, check out my book,  The Four Noble Truths of Love NOTE: We'll be taking a two-week break. The Buddhism Beyond Belief Podcast will return with a new episode on June 13. Mwah!For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

Which one are you in right now?In this episode, I explore the six realms of Buddhist cosmology which can be understood as both literal places of rebirth and psychological states we all experience. I also mention how this might help us contextualize the chaos and cruelty of our current political situation in the US. The realms include:The God Realm - A place of complete abundance where beings have everything they desire but no motivation to seek enlightenmentThe Jealous God/Asura Realm - Beings with power and resources consumed by covetousness and aggression, always fighting for more. And more. (Sound familiar?)The Human Realm - The most fortunate realm with the right balance of suffering and ease for spiritual development. Yay us!The Hungry Ghost Realm - Represents insatiable desires and cravings that can never be fulfilledThe Animal Realm - Characterized by basic survival needs and limited spiritual capacity, yet capable of love and connectionThe Hell Realm - A place of constant suffering with no relief, glimpsed through our experiences of heartbreak and witnessing sufferingResources Mentioned:"A Guided Tour of Hell" by Sam Bercholz - Featuring descriptions and visual depictions of the hell realmsJoin my meditation community, the Open Heart Project Sangha, to practice together and learn how to apply these teachings to everyday life. Would be great to see you there!For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

Why do we turn to meditation when things fall apart—and what are we really supposed to do with all these overwhelming emotions? In this short episode, we explore three powerful ways to relate to difficult feelings like anger, fear, and anxiety: as afflictive; as bridges to compassion; and as hidden forms of wisdom. All three ways are accurate, though usually only the first is described in Buddhist writings.In this episode, you’ll hear about how to work skillfully with emotional intensity, not necessarily by escaping it, but by uncovering the fierce clarity and deep humanity that may lie beneath. For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

In this episode, Susan reflects on one of the most common meditation struggles: staying consistent. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why can’t I just do the thing I know is good for me?”—this episode is for you.The surprising truth? It’s not a discipline problem. It’s a misunderstanding of what meditation really is.Main Topics Covered:The Real Reason Consistency is HardIt’s not about willpower.Most people approach meditation as self-improvement—but it’s actually a spiritual practice.Self-help says: “Something is wrong with me.” Spiritual practice says: “I am already whole.”Three Spiritual Anchors for a Deeper PracticeMake OfferingsSmall rituals (light a candle, burn incense) open your heart to mystery and devotion. They move the practice from “What can I get?” to “What can I discover?”Request BlessingsCall in your lineage: spiritual teachers, ancestors, artists, activists—anyone who’s shaped your path. You’re not sitting alone.Dedicate the Merit Offer the benefits of your practice to all beings (including yourself!). Whatever happens during your session—delight, frustration, sleepiness—it can be of benefit, even though we may not be able to imagine how.Three Practical Supports for Consistency (aka The Three Jewels)These are the classic Buddhist “refuges,” and they’re also the structure we need to stay steady:Buddha – Your own awakened nature. Sitting down to meditate is a reconnection with this.Dharma – Study, reflect, journal—contemplate the deeper why behind your practice.Sangha – Practice with others, even virtually. Community is often the missing key.Final Takeaway:Consistency doesn’t come from willpower—it comes from aligning with meaning.When meditation is treated as a way to open your heart rather than a way to “fix” yourself, a deeper magic is glimpsed.For more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project

In Buddhism (as in most wisdom traditions), compassion is central—but it’s often misunderstood. It’s not about being nice, it’s about being awake. True compassion is wise, fierce, and rooted in awareness.“Idiot compassion” is a term coined by Chögyam Trungpa to describe misguided kindness that stems from the three poisons:Grasping – trying to feel good or be liked.Aggression – trying to control or make something (or someone) disappear.Delusion – trying to avoid seeing what is really going on.True compassion requires discernment, not people-pleasing. It might mean being sweet, but it could also mean getting angry or saying nothing. The only way to know is by paying attention.In activism, the same principle applies: if our actions come from hate, they’ll echo hate. If they come from a broken heart longing to ease suffering, different gates will open.There are two kinds of compassion to consider:Relative compassion helps others through kindness and care.Absolute compassion is dwelling in perfect recognition of interdependence. (To learn more about this, see previous episodes on the Heart Sutra.)The spiritual path is just as much about courage as it is about kindness. It asks us to meet suffering not with spiritual bypassing, but with a heart shattered open and ready to serve.SM (for Genevieve)Not all compassion is created equal.In Buddhism, compassion isn’t about being nice. It’s about being awake.Sometimes it’s soft. Sometimes it’s fierce. But it’s never about avoiding discomfort.Chögyam Trungpa called it “idiot compassion” when our desire to help is rooted in:• Craving (to be liked)• Aggression (to control or avoid conflict)• Delusion (pretending everything’s fine)Real compassion comes from clarity.It doesn’t always look “spiritual.” Sometimes it sets boundaries. Sometimes it says no. And when rooted in heartbreak for the suffering of the world, it becomes powerful.Let’s remember that true love can also be fierce. 🔥#compassion #buddhism #idiotcompassion #fiercelove #spiritualpath #openheart #wakeup #chogyamtrungpa #realcompassion #awarenessFor more on Buddhist teachings and how our humanity isn’t necessarily in our way, sign up for my free weekly newsletter or join the Open Heart Project sangha for more connection with community and with me. If this podcast has been meaningful to you, it would be great if you would subscribe, give it a five star rating and share it with a friend. To join or learn more about The Open Heart Project please visit openheartproject.com. Thoughts? Email us at info@susanpiver.com Produced by Citizens of Sound Music by: Derek O'Brien©Open Heart Project