Where Do We Go From Here?

Originally released as Episode 49.  This episode is all about one word: agency. Jessica and Devi revisit their conversation with Sheila Gregoire about what it really means for women to experience pleasure, make choices, and have autonomy in their sexual relationships. From obligation sex to pleasure gaps in marriage, we dissect the ways purity culture erased agency—and what reclaiming it can look like.  

Host: EDJ Guest: Rev. Brandan Robertson – author of Queer and Christian, TikTok pastor, theologian, and public speaker. In this heartfelt and deeply thoughtful conversation, EDJ speaks with Rev. Brandan Robertson about growing up evangelical, discovering his queerness, and finding a theology that held both faith and identity. Together, they unpack: Brandan’s journey from Moody Bible Institute to affirming theology The trauma of purity culture and conversion therapy Why “obedience” and biblical literalism can be harmful What the Bible really says about queerness – including the infamous word arsenokoite Queer readings of scripture and the radical inclusivity of Jesus How deconstruction can lead to more honest, expansive faith What it means to let love—not fear—guide your theology Whether you're curious, questioning, or walking your own road of reconstruction, this episode offers theological insight, personal stories, and radical grace. 🛒 Buy Queer and Christian: https://QueerChristian.org 📍 Follow Brandan: TikTok, Instagram, and more via QueerChristian.org 🔗 Support us on Patreon: patreon.com/wheredowegopod

Dive into a candid exploration of faith and the lingering effects of purity culture. Discover how church trauma intertwines with the struggle for personal faith, love, and grace. The conversation tackles the complexities of obedience, revealing how it can lead to perfectionism and depression. Listen as they challenge traditional doctrines while advocating for a rebuilt spiritual connection on one’s own terms. Prepare for raw honesty, nuanced reflections, and a heartwarming prayer for community and justice.

Is Christianity still good news for women? It’s a big question — and in this episode, Jessica is joined by Emily and Kristen for a thoughtful, vulnerable conversation that doesn’t shy away from the tension. Together, they explore: 🧠 How growing up in the church shaped their views on womanhood, sex, and submission ✝️ The parts of Christianity they’ve kept — and what they’ve had to leave behind 💔 The difference between Jesus and the institutions that claim to represent him 🧎‍♀️ Whether the “good news” can still be good when it’s caused so much harm 🪢 And what hope, faith, and spirituality can look like after the unraveling This isn’t a theological debate — it’s an honest look at what it means to be a woman who still wants to engage faith after everything. No easy answers. No hard feelings. Just an open conversation for wherever you’re at.

What happens when saying yes to God means leaving behind everything you built — and trusting Him in the silence? In this deeply moving episode, Jessica talks with evangelist, author, and podcast host Brenda Palmer about her upcoming book The Journey of Yes. But this conversation goes far beyond the book. Brenda opens up about growing up in purity culture, losing her church community after choosing to speak out, walking away from a thriving career, and learning to hear God’s voice in the wilderness of financial uncertainty and emotional pain. With wisdom, joy, and radical honesty, she reminds us: That hearing from God is a process, not a lightning bolt That obedience isn’t about transaction, but transformation And that our trauma doesn’t disqualify us — it’s often where God meets us Whether you’ve walked away from church, are learning to trust God again, or are somewhere in between, this conversation is a breath of Spirit-filled air. Where to find Brenda: https://www.iambrendapalmer.com/ Pre-orders: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/762936/the-journey-of-yes-by-brenda-palmer/ Where to find us: https://www.patreon.com/wheredowegopod  

This episode of No Hard Feelings is one for the books: we’re tackling two wildly different but surprisingly rich topics — emotional cheating in the age of smartphones, and the global significance of the first American pope, Leo XIV. First, Jessica, Kristen, and Emily unpack what emotional cheating actually is (spoiler: it’s not as cut and dry as you think). From secret texts and blurred lines to purity culture hangovers and relational ethics, we sit in the tension and explore the gray areas of emotional intimacy. Then we shift gears to talk about the newly appointed Pope Leo XIV — what it means for the global church, the far right’s response, and how Catholicism’s center of gravity may be shifting away from Europe. We don’t offer all the answers. But we ask the questions with honesty, curiosity, and no hard feelings. 🎧 Support the show and get bonus content at patreon.com/wheredowegopod

What if your pain isn’t just something you have to live with? In this episode, Jessica talks with osteopath Rebecca Lovett about pelvic floors, vaginismus, body shame, and the impact of purity culture on women’s health. They explore how trauma can live in the body, why many women suffer in silence, and what it means to reconnect with your body — not just spiritually, but physically. This conversation is honest, warm, and deeply practical — and it's here to remind you: your body is not a problem to be solved. 📍 Rebecca Lovett is a Melbourne-based osteopath with a focus on pelvic health and whole-body care. Learn more: rebeccalovettosteopath.com.au

Join an engaging discussion on deconstruction as the hosts share personal journeys, including moving from Australia to America. Dive into the complex themes of grace and purity culture, and how they shape beliefs about relationships. The podcast emphasizes the need for open conversations surrounding faith, sexuality, and communal support. Reflect on the radical nature of grace and its transformative power. Future interviews promise to further explore spirituality and personal narratives around faith.

Welcome to Where Do We Go From Here's new monthly episode series: No Hard Feelings - where we take on the questions that don’t have easy answers. But the answers don’t need to be hard and fast. Here we’ll explore different perspectives, share our own thoughts and invite you to form your own - because here, there’s no hard feelings.  Host: Jessica  Co-hosts: Emily & Kristen  In the inaugeral episode of 'No Hard Feelings', Jessica, Emily, and Kristen delve into the complexities of ghosting and its implications in dating and relationships. They explore whether ghosting is ever acceptable, the nuances of communication in various relationship stages, and the importance of safety and vulnerability. The conversation encourages thoughtful dialogue and diverse perspectives on these often contentious topics. In this episode, the hosts discuss the emotional impact of ghosting in relationships, emphasizing the lack of communication and emotional intelligence often exhibited by men. They transition into the topic of contraception, debating whose responsibility it is and the importance of open conversations about sexual health. The discussion highlights the need for mutual respect and understanding in relationships, particularly regarding contraceptive choices. The episode concludes with a reflection on the challenges of adulting and the necessity of ongoing dialogue in navigating complex issues.   Takeaways: Ghosting is defined as ending a relationship without explanation. The hosts discuss the disrespectful nature of ghosting in established relationships. Safety concerns can justify ghosting in certain situations. Communication is essential, but not always safe or easy. Different perspectives on ghosting can lead to more understanding. Caspering, or friendly ghosting, is a more respectful approach. The impact of ghosting on emotional resilience is significant. Generational differences in ghosting behaviors are evident. The hosts emphasize the importance of vulnerability in dating. Navigating dating requires balancing honesty and personal safety. Ghosting leaves individuals with an ambiguous loss. Most men lack emotional intelligence regarding ghosting. Women often articulate their feelings better than men. Contraception is a shared responsibility between partners. Open conversations about sex are crucial for safety. Condoms should be prioritized to protect both partners. Purity culture impacts decisions around contraception. Conversations can prevent misunderstandings in relationships. Adulting involves navigating difficult conversations. It's important to keep asking questions about relationships.   Where Do We Go From Here? is a podcast hosted and produced by Jessica Vanderwyngaard.  Support the work of the podcast at patreon.com/wheredowegopod

After nearly five years of co-creating Where Do We Go From Here?, Devi Abraham is stepping away from the podcast and Patreon community — and today, Jess sits down with her for one final conversation. In this emotional and reflective episode, Devi shares what led to her decision, how her life has shifted since 2019, and what she’s dreaming about in this next chapter. From parenting and mental health to rest, community, and the surprising role of cake in connecting with teenagers, this episode is full of the warmth, honesty, and depth Devi has brought to the mic every single time. Whether you've been here since the beginning or are just tuning in, this is a moment to mark. Thank you, Devi. 💛 👉 Stick around to hear what’s next for Where Do We Go From Here?, including our new monthly serial No Hard Feelings and Thoughts & Prayers. 🔗 Show Notes: 📬 Subscribe to Devi’s writing: deviabraham.substack.com 📸 Follow Devi on Instagram: @devi_writes 💛 Learn more about Prison Network 🧵 Join our community on Patreon: patreon.com/wheredowegopod 🎧 Listen to the episode with Matthias: [“What Are the Rules When There Are No Rules?”]