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Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... - The urge may be to talk your child out of thinking they're "dumb," but it can be helpful to stay with this feeling and lean into being curious about her experience. - How to zoom out and determine if your child is speaking out of frustration and is just emoting or if they actually have internalized that they think they aren't smart. - How to talk with your child in a way that helps build back their confidence in themself when they are struggling to learn something new, like reading. - We also want to try not to catastrophize this situation either - just because your child is saying this doesn't mean they will permanently have a poor self-image. - You can boost your child's self-confidence by feeling confident in their ability to handle the challenges they face. - How to get clear with your kid about what they think "smart" and "dumb" means, and building flexibility around those ideas. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉🏻 If you're interested in exploring whether your child could benefit from a Neuropsychological Evaluation, CLICK HERE to learn about what we offer at Upshur Bren Psychology Group or SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs. 📚 BoyMom: Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity by Ruth Whippman 🎥 Inside Out and Inside Out 2 WANT TO LISTEN TO MORE EPISODES ON THIS TOPIC: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child says "I hate myself" 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about learning styles and what the research reveals are the best methods for teaching children with Dan Willingham 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangerous and pressures of achievement centered systems with Jennifer Breheny Wallace WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

How can you honor who your child is while still equipping them with the tools they need to thrive in our fast-paced world? That's exactly what I'm talking about with my guest, McCourtney Professor of Child Studies and Professor of Psychology at Penn State, Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar. In this episode, we dive into: - What temperament actually is from a psychological standpoint (it's probably not what you think it is!) and the factors professionals use to measure and map it out. - What impact temperament has on the way sensitive, shy, or explosive children regulate their emotions and respond to their environment. - How parents can create opportunities for their child to become self-actualized and why focusing on self-actualization is the precursor to helping them achieve and thrive. - Inhibited versus exuberant - how finding the right niche for a child's unique temperament can define their success, even if it doesn't align with traditional expectations. - How to find that middle ground between pushing your child when they need a bit of encouragement and nurturing them when they need more support and scaffolding. Tune in for valuable insights that will help you navigate the complexities of parenting with more confidence and compassion! LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. KORALY PÉREZ-EDGAR: https://www.catlabpsu.com/our-team-1 CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 How understanding your child's sensory sensitivities can strengthen their emotional intelligence with Alyssa Blask Campbell 🎧 Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz of the Yale Child Study Center 🎧 Debunking the myth of learning styles with Dr. Dan Willingham

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... - How there is a lot of weight put on attending all the birthdays your child gets invited to, and hear us share a permission-granting reframe you can tell yourself when you feel that pressure. - How to work toward identifying the aspect of birthday parties that are overwhelming for your child - and what the most common triggers are (like transitions, loud sounds, lots of kids) to help you get started. - Why it actually makes sense that this is so hard for parents when kids struggle with birthday parties. What social stakes are at play, and how to balance those with what is best for your kid. - How to celebrate the birthday boy or girl in a manner that is more realistic for your child, but that allows them to still feel included and fosters their peer relationships. - What you can do before the birthday party to help prepare your child for what they can expect and how to navigate their dysregulation if they get overwhelmed once you're there. - Two psychologist-mom's recommendations of exactly how to respond (when to nurture them and when to push them) when your child gets clingy at a birthday party. WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SIMILAR TOPICS: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your child's sensory sensitivities with Alyssa Blask Campbell 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child form strong friendship bonds with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what you can do when your child experiences peer rejection in elementary school WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

I'm joined by Dr. Vanessa Lapointe to discuss effective discipline strategies and how to approach those tough parenting moments with warmth, compassion, and understanding - for yourself and your child. In this episode, we dive into: - The profound impact of coregulation and why it's a crucial first step we don't want to skip if we want the discipline and lessons we're trying to teach our kids to stick. - How to navigate those "bad behavior" moments by rethinking the entire framework of discipline (Spoiler Alert: It starts with a mindset shift to help you understand how there is actually no such thing as "bad" behaviors.) - The up-side of having a more sensitive, reactive, or explosive kid - and how to nurture their more sensitive side to bring out their best qualities and help them manage their big emotions so they are more in control of their behaviors. - The powerful role of connection in discipline, including how to create a safe space where your child can learn and grow, even in the midst of challenging behaviors. - Strategies for parents struggling to keep their cool, working through feelings of guilt or shame, and understanding that it's never too late to implement new parenting approaches. If you've ever felt overwhelmed by traditional discipline methods or wondered how to discipline your child in a way that strengthens your bond, this episode is for you! LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. VANESSA LAPOINTE: https://drvanessalapointe.com/ READ DR. VANESSA'S BOOKS: 📚 Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up 📚 Parenting Right From the Start: Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler Years INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT DISCIPLINE? Click HERE to download my free guide on effectively disciplining your child with strategies that don't utilize shame or guilt - but still work to get your child to behave! CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Positive parenting isn't permissive parenting: How to integrate effective discipline that prioritizes emotional and mental health with Sarah R. Moore 🎧 How to move out of power struggles and into cooperation with Jen Lumanlan 🎧 Busting positive parenting myths to help you authentically foster secure attachment and connection with Raised Good's Tracy Gillett

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about... - Who can assess, evaluate, and diagnose neuropsychological diagnosises like ADHD, dyslexia, autism, etc., and how to go about getting one for your child if you don't have a formal diagnosis yet. - The benefits of a comprehensive evaluation, when your child might not need such an in-depth approach, and how to determine which is right for your unique child. - Navigating the school support system and what they are required to provide for you and your child after you make a formal request. - The basic differences between an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) versus a 504 plan. ✨✨✨Want more details?: CLICK HERE to read a blog article that breaks this all down for you.✨✨✨ - What are soft-building services and how your child's teacher can implement these tools to help your child thrive. - It can be helpful for parents to work with an advocate in this process - this can reduce anxiety and to allow you to have a dedicated person with a deep understanding of this process and your child's rights to advocate on their behalf. - What to do when the recommendations from your child's evaluation don't correspond with the services your child's school provides - and when to bring in a professional to help translate this jargon for you. - Never apologize for advocating for your child! It can help you feel more comfortable and empowered to go into these meetings with action items and knowing what you're asking for. - Working to come together to create a collaborative environment with your school system, your child's teachers, and your mental health professional. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 👉🏻 If you're interested in exploring more personalized support options, reach out to us at Upshur Bren Psychology Group for a free 15-minute consultation so we can suggest a treatment plan for your unique needs. WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SIMILAR TOPICS: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a child with Autism with Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child feel comfortable utilizing school supports without feeling self-conscious 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about creating a secure attachment with your neurodiverse child with Dr. Norrine Russell WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Is your child explosive? Do you struggle to keep your own emotions in-check, then feel guilty after you lose your cool? We're all working with the same equipment and understanding the basics of what is happening in our kid's brains and our own brains when we get dysregulated can have a huge impact on how often we're able to stay calm in the face of life's chaos. I am honored to be joined once again by Dr. Dan Siegel to explore: - The "window of tolerance" - what it is and how to use it to help you and your child stay grounded, even during stressful moments. - Dan performs a visceral Yes/No Exercise that listeners can follow along with to become a more effective regulator of your own threat response. - There is no such thing as being perfect, real secure attachment boils down to proper repair after you lose your cool. We cover the most effective strategies and tools for facilitating repair in your relationship with your child. - Everyone has innate temperament and personality traits (like sensitivity, intensity of their reactions, and their response to novelty), but do those proclivities become intensified by our attachment relationships? - How to apply these strategies to kids who don't fit the mold - who are sensitive, explosive, neurodiverse, or quick to become dysregulated. - Dan's views as a psychiatrist on how medication and clinical interventions can be properly used with children. - How to look at any diagnosis from the perspective of integration versus disintegration - and by looking at it this way, what that means for treatment. LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. DAN SIEGEL: https://drdansiegel.com/ A FEW OF DAN'S BOOKS FOR PARENTS TO GET STARTED WITH: 📚 Parenting from the Inside Out 📚 The Whole-Brain Child 📚 The Power of Showing Up 📚 No-Drama Discipline CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 The neuroscience of mindfulness with Dr. Dan Siegel 🎧 How to use mindfulness for ourselves and our children with Diana Winston 🎧 How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it with Dr. Miriam Steele

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... 3:49 - How a child's developmental ability to conceptualize time is different than adults' and how this gets in the way of them sharing our sense of urgency. 6:58 - Kids often have trouble transitioning to things they don't want to do, we'll talk through strategies for helping them tolerate this better. 8:10 - The difference between a bribe and a positive reward, and when to use each. 10:45 - How integrating moments into the routine that promote autonomy and help your child feel a deeper sense of control can make a big difference. 12:25 - How Dr. Sarah adds elements of playfulness and gamification into the routine with her own kids. 18:55 - There is a huge tradeoff to our kid's mental health if they are obedient because they are are afraid of us - but that doesn't mean it wouldn't make parenting easier. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: ⏰ Kids Visual Timer or Sand Timers to help your child learn about time 📖 My FREE workbook with 6 games to help you incorporate playfulness while teaching your child emotion regulation skills WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THIS TOPIC? 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode that covers a 10-step framework for getting your child to change their behavior in just 3 weeks 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child doesn't listen to you 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about bribery WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU: Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

In this episode, I'm sitting down with hostage and crisis negotiator Karleen Savage to share practical strategies to help you manage conflict and family dynamics. In this episode, we explore: Crisis Negotiation at Home: How to apply professional conflict resolution techniques to everyday parenting challenges. Encouraging Accountability: A framework for structuring conversations with your child that fosters honesty, responsibility, and effective communication skills. The Role of Playfulness in Discipline: The surprising power of levity and humor in diffusing tense situations and helping kids learn from their mistakes. Mantras for Success: How to meet your children where they are emotionally, helping them navigate conflicts while feeling understood and supported. Building Resilience: Practical tips for creating an environment that promotes self-awareness, confidence, and problem-solving skills in your kids. Tune in to get tools you can use to turn conflicts into growth opportunities for your whole family! LEARN MORE ABOUT KARLEEN SAVAGE: https://www.karleensavage.com/ READ KARLEEN'S BOOK: 📚 The Confident Teen Blueprint CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL RELATED EPISODES: 🎧 How to resolve conflict, prioritize our needs, and set appropriate boundaries with Dr. Rick Hanson 🎧 How to talk so your teen will listen with Elizabeth Bennett 🎧 Fostering deep, authentic and connected conversations with your kids with Rebecca Rolland

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about... 4:38 - What Dr. Sarah says about assertiveness skills that causes Dr. Rebecca to have a major eye-roll moment. 6:08 - The assertiveness skills that you can expect to see at different stages of your child's development - and how to allow these things to shift, change, and be fluid. 7:02 - Understanding what is happening in your toddler and young child's brain as they grow, so you can be mindful of leaning into patterns that create neural connections that can serve them best throughout their life. 11:15 - Exactly when and how to step in when you observe an interpersonal conflict that supports your child while still allowing them to build their own problem-solving skills. 16:15 - How to build assertiveness skills outside the heat of the moment. And why these can also impact skills related to sharing, flexibility, and resilience. 22:43 - Strategies for parenting in a world where we have so much access to always be monitoring our kids - when it's helpful and when it becomes a hindrance for us and for them. REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 📚 All Mine by Terrific Toddlers WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SIMILAR TOPICS? 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your toddler learn to share 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your toddler feel seen, validated, and understood with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about having a healthy relationship with technology with Emily Cherkin WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

Are you feeling overwhelmed with all the conflicting parenting advice out there? In this episode, I'm joined by Raised Good's Tracy Gillett to discuss how one simple guiding principle can serve as your parenting compass. In this episode, we explore: - How the attachment relationship comes into play when our kids are "pushing our buttons" and what we can do to decrease how often they test the limits. - What rupture and repair is and how this can be an underrated and incredibly impactful strategy to utilize in to strengthen your connection with your child. - The empowering mindset shift you need to start "breaking the rules" and trusting your gut, plus how to get past the anxiety that can come with making these decisions. - The single overarching question you can use as your guiding compass (spoiler alert: it's all about connection) to inform every single parenting question and choice you're faced with throughout your child's life. - The trap we can find ourselves in between authenticity and attachment, and how to help our kids avoid those same pitfalls we may have experienced in our own childhoods. - The misconception that you must choose between connection and discipline, and exactly how we can effectively discipline our kids. - Practical strategies for building your parenting toolbox, like how and when to "bank connection," where to incorporate playfulness, and much more! Whether you're new to parenting or looking to deepen your connection with your kids, this conversation will offer valuable insights and practical tips on how to parent with intention and authenticity. LEARN MORE ABOUT TRACY GILLETT: https://raisedgood.com/ REGISTER FOR THE FREE RAISED GOOD ONLINE SUMMIT: The 2024 Raised Good Online Summit LEARN MORE ABOUT TIMEOUTS AND EFFECTIVE DISCIPLINE: 📚 READ Tracy's blog post 🤳 DOWNLOAD my free effective discipline guide 🎧 LISTEN to my podcast interview with Sarah R. Moore CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it with Dr. Miriam Steele 🎧 How nurturing shapes our child's brain and sets them up for lifelong mental health with Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum 🎧 How to use the attachment relationship to help your toddler fall and stay asleep with Eileen Henry