Mojo for the Modern Man

Today I had the privilege of sitting down with Chinazom Nwabueze, a Nigerian-born performance psychologist whose journey from Lagos to London to the US reads like a masterclass in resilience and reinvention. We traced his remarkable path from those brutal boarding school days in eastern Nigeria—where he learned survival skills that would serve him for life—through his economics studies at Leicester, a successful banking career, and his bold pivot into performance psychology at 39. What struck me most was Chinazom's raw honesty about that pivotal moment when he looked in the mirror and refused to let fear of failure trap him in a career that was slowly killing his spirit. His insights on men's mental fitness are profound, particularly his concept of "real talk"—both with ourselves and others—and how most of us reach our forties having mastered spreadsheets but knowing nothing about our own inner workings. The conversation kept circling back to self-love under pressure, which Chinazom identified as the deceptively simple answer to the complicated question of high performance. His hiking group of Nigerian men and the transformative power of "banter" reminded me that healing happens in community, not isolation. Sometimes the most radical act isn't positive thinking—it's simply getting curious about what we're actually grateful for when life feels overwhelming.Bio:Chinazom (pronounced 'Chee-Nah-Zuhm') Nwabueze is a strategic and innovative C-level coach, consultant, advisor, trainer and facilitator, Chinazom delivers solutions at the intersection of business, people, and coaching strategy. As the founder of Dreamcatchers Performance LLC, he has dedicated his career to integrating high performance with mental fitness to unlock resilience, adaptability, innovation and sustained change. Through deep discovery, Chinazom creates innovative solutions that bridge the gap between business transformation and human capital, driving business outcomes, breakthrough performance, and best-in-class working environments.

I had such a meaningful conversation with Kristal DeSantis, a marriage and family therapist whose journey from Kobe, Japan to becoming an expert on modern relationships perfectly illustrates how outsider perspective can reveal hidden truths. Growing up as the eldest of eight in a multilingual household with Chinese and American parents, Kristal learned early about responsibility and organization, but it wasn't until she landed in North Carolina at eighteen that she discovered the bewildering complexity of American dating culture. Her hilarious moment of asking a coworker "Who are his parents?" after hearing about a first date perfectly captures the culture shock that would eventually fuel her professional calling. What struck me most was Kristal's refreshingly honest admission that she avoided dating entirely until family pressure around her sister's wedding forced her to confront her own relational blind spots. Her discovery that being intellectually capable doesn't automatically translate to emotional vulnerability led her to therapy, where she learned the difference between being guarded and being open to connection. Kristal's decision to write specifically for men emerged from noticing the stark imbalance in relationship resources available to couples, and her insights about the myth of the "non-emotional man" challenge us to recognize that passion for football and road rage are just as much emotional expressions as tears. In a world obsessed with quick fixes and life hacks, Kristal reminds us that the deepest connections require the courage to step into the arena of vulnerability.LinkedIn

I had such a great conversation with Tripp Lanier, who has this gift for cutting through all the self-help nonsense with refreshing honesty. We got into the whole armoring thing that men do—you know, that exhausting performance where we pretend we've got everything figured out while secretly running from anything that might actually challenge us. Tripp's journey perfectly illustrates how we convince ourselves we can hack our way out of life's uncomfortable realities, only to discover that the escape hatch we're desperately seeking doesn't actually exist. What I loved about our chat was his insight into authentic men's work—the difference between advice-giving (which nobody wants) and the art of asking questions that help guys discover their own truths. We talked about responsibility, power, and why so many successful men are secretly miserable despite checking all the cultural boxes. Tripp's perspective on growing up versus just getting older really hit home, especially his point about how we keep looking for the next guru or system to save us from having to actually feel our feelings. The whole conversation kept circling back to this central question: what if we stopped running from the very things that could transform us?Website

I sat down with Alex Terranova, whose journey from emotionally disconnected bar manager in Venice Beach to thoughtful men's work facilitator really struck me. Growing up in 1980s LA, Alex absorbed impossible masculine ideals from action heroes and magazine covers—he admits to getting a Hulk Hogan workout set at eight years old, thinking he needed to bulk up to become a man. What hit me most was his honesty about the emotional flatlining that followed heartbreak in his twenties, where his family genuinely wondered if he cared about anything anymore. His breakthrough came unexpectedly during a family dinner in Costa Rica, when a simple gratitude exercise completely cracked him open and left him sobbing in front of confused relatives. From there, he dove into intensive coaching training—what he calls a complete firmware update. Our conversation about cold plunging was fascinating; Alex discovered that learning to regulate his nervous system in freezing water translated directly to staying grounded when life gets chaotic. His perspective on taking full responsibility while rejecting the lone wolf mythology really resonated with me. We all know adversity is coming, but Alex's story illustrates something crucial: some people actually develop the tools to remain present and steady when the waves inevitably hit.Website

In today's episode, I dive into the rich tapestry of Aaron Johnson's life journey from the "sexy town" of Phelan, California to his transformative work addressing touch deprivation among Black men. Aaron's storytelling is magnetic as he recounts discovering the sacredness of his desert homeland through acapella singing with his siblings, navigating dyslexia and special education, and finding his way to CalArts despite the odds. What strikes me most is Aaron's profound concept of "magic" – that ineffable quality statistics can't measure but that fuels human potential beyond paper predictions. His candid revelation about the creation of his Chronically Under-Touched Project hits like lightning; when he asked a young Black mentee "When was the last time you received three minutes of thoughtful platonic touch?" and discovered it had been fifteen years, Aaron unearthed an urgent and overlooked epidemic. His work now challenges the violent touch narratives dominating Black male experience while offering healing alternatives, reminding us that sometimes transformative work begins with the simplest question nobody thought to ask.Bio: Aaron Johnson is a public speaker, facilitator, and touch activist, fostering environments where Black-bodied individuals can express their full selves. As a founder of Holistic Resistance, Grief to Action and The Chronically UnderTouched Project, Aaron takes the time to hold the stories of Black people around homophobia, transphobia, and internalized racism. Aaron's journey began, as it does for many Black men, with lack of loving and platonic touch. Now, Aaron assists other Black men in developing holistic touch practices to move from a Chronically UnderTouched state into touch balance. Aaron aims to create spaces for Black people and People of the Global Majority (PGM/BIPOC) to connect with each other and the earth. He and his team are establishing retreats and workshops on Black-owned land in the Mojave Desert and beyond to promote emotional and physical tenderness, platonic connection, and singing, which enhances the healing process for those overlooked by mainstream society. Website

In today's episode of Mojo for the Modern Man, I had a powerful conversation with Steven Wolt, whose journey from childhood trauma to redemption offers a masterclass in masculine transformation. Growing up near New York City with a physically violent father, Steven masked his inner turmoil behind athletic achievements and later financial success, becoming a high-flying executive while secretly battling depression and disconnection. What fascinated me was how his seven-figure income and outward success actually intensified his inner emptiness, driving him deeper into alcohol, drugs, and porn addiction until his spectacular professional implosion in 2008. The turning point came through a treatment program specifically addressing sex addiction and childhood trauma, leading to a recovery path that challenged everything he thought he knew about being a man. Now heading Valor Recovery, Steven helps others trapped in similar cycles, particularly around porn addiction and intimacy issues. His redefinition of masculinity – prioritizing vulnerability, honor and genuine connection over conquest and toughness – resonated deeply with me, especially his insight that "men need other men to become better men." The conversation left me reflecting on how many of us are still living by outdated masculine scripts that promise strength but deliver isolation instead.Website: 

I sat down with Glenn Sandifer, who went from being a self-proclaimed "introverted only child" to a corporate leader with some fascinating stops along the way – including a stint at Samsung back when they were the "Dynex of their day" (his words, and if you're too young to get that reference, count yourself lucky). We dove into how growing up ping-ponging between family members and entertaining himself with video games and comics inadvertently prepared him for leadership. Glenn had me chuckling with his story of becoming a tech expert by practically living in libraries, learning the difference between plasma and LCD displays when most of us were just hoping our TVs would turn on. But what really got me was his take on modern masculinity and leadership – turns out there's a world of difference between being a manager who just keeps the ship afloat and a leader who actually steers it somewhere worthwhile. His insights on male friendship and community hit especially hard in our age of LinkedIn connections but real-world disconnection. Between his corporate wisdom and spiritual groundedness, Glenn makes a compelling case for measuring success not by the size of your PowerPoint deck (he's down to two slides now), but by how many people you help climb the ladder with you.About Glenn: Founder Glenn Sandifer has the current privilege of leading the world class Inside Sales and Client Sucess group at the second largest Global Security provider.  His strategic leadership and client-centric approach, lead to consistent conversion of inbound and outbound contacts, envied by the competition.  Glenn provides strategic support within the Global Marketing Team with a heavy focus on North American Markets. Whether it is supporting the Sales Operations components of the business or providing support to the Operations group, Glenn ensures value for the organization stays top of mind.  In 2018, Glenn Founded Glenn Sandifer Consulting with the aim of supporting SME and Local Enterprise Organizations in their efforts around Demand Generation, Lead Qualification, Lead Nurture and Client Success practices. Most clients were in the Home Service Verticals and enjoyed unprecedented growth during this time.  He is currenlty a member of Emblaze (formerly AA-ISP)  Wilson County and Nashville Black Chambers of Commerce. Glenn is also a proud member of the Gamma Phi Chapter of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity, Inc. Glenn is from Indiana, but currently resides in Nashville, Tennessee with his wife and two children. WebsiteLinkedInFaceBookInstagram

On this episode of Mojo for the Modern Man, I had the privilege of chatting with Donald Bialkowski, who might just be one of the most refreshingly honest therapists I've ever met – and believe me, I've met quite a few. Donald grew up in the quiet countryside of Green Bay, found himself teaching meditation while secretly perfecting what he calls "sophisticated substance use," until life finally caught up with him at 40 and cracked him wide open. The beauty of Donald's story isn't just in the transformation (though that's pretty remarkable), but in how he weaves together his own journey with this broader understanding of what keeps us men stuck – particularly this sneaky little thing he calls "the master emotion" of shame, which apparently loves nothing more than a good dose of isolation to really dig its heels in. What really got me thinking was how Donald went from performing compassion as a young therapist to actually embodying it through his own messy process of growth. These days, he's helping other men navigate the murky waters of uncertainty and complexity, all while cheerfully dismantling the myth that we should somehow have it all figured out on our own. The whole conversation left me wondering about this sort of masculine paradox – how we're all trying to prove we don't need anyone, while secretly knowing that's exactly what we need most.Website: www.onpurposementoring.com

I had a deeply moving conversation with Stephen Campolo, whose transformation from an overweight teenager to a fitness coach reveals layers of complexity that most weight loss stories gloss over. With remarkable candor, Stephen shared his journey through restrictive dieting, competitive bodybuilding at 17, and his ongoing dance with binge eating - including a sobering wake-up call when his gallbladder nearly ruptured at 30. What struck me most was Stephen's ability to hold seemingly contradictory truths: the discipline required for physical transformation alongside the persistent challenge of food addiction. His evolution from chasing six-pack abs to advocating for holistic health was catalyzed by losing his mother to cancer at 52, redirecting his mission toward helping others avoid preventable health crises. Stephen's willingness to shatter the fitness industry's façade of perfection by openly discussing his struggles makes this conversation particularly powerful, offering a roadmap for anyone wrestling with their own relationship with food, body image, and self-acceptance.Website: https://www.flxbodyfitness.com/flx-body-type-blueprint-1

Act two with Jake Kaufman delves into the challenging terrain of genuine transformation and healing. We explore how surface-level changes often mask deeper patterns, illustrated by Jake's transition from chaotic restaurant work to a tech startup, where familiar dysfunction followed him. The conversation expands into broader themes of collective healing, examining why men's personal development spaces often remain underpopulated despite critical need. Jake's experience launching a men's group and writing his book reveals how healing moves from individual work through community support to broader social impact. His mission to help men break their silence around trauma highlights a crucial insight: isolation perpetuates suffering, while community creates pathways to authentic growth and connection.Bio:Jake Kauffman is an Executive Producer and Founder of Transient Productions. He completely gave up his corporate career to move to Los Angeles and pursue his dream of producing original films that are both inspirational and compelling. He is currently wrapping production on my first feature entitled “I’m So Good I’m Embarrassed,” a documentary chronicling the last year in the life of his 93-year-old grandfather. His intention is to empower others to prioritize making intimate and lasting connections in their relationships.