LOVERS by shan

How do we fix our desire for relationships with people that will inevitably become broken. And how do we stop ourselves from aligning healthy with boring? That’s what we’re talking about on this episode of Lovers and Friends.  Attraction, whether emotional, physical, or psychological, is a complex process. It can be influenced by numerous factors, from biology to personal history. If someone finds themselves repeatedly attracted to individuals with certain undesirable characteristics (like the makeup of a fuckboy: charismatic but not reliable, fun to be around but not fun to be apart from because communication is not stable or when out of sight they’re unpredictable, they make big plans but don’t consistently make the small actions to move towards that goal especially when it comes to you, etc…), understanding the underlying causes and taking conscious steps to modify patterns of attraction can be beneficial. Here's a scientific, step-by-step approach: Self-awareness and reflection  Next, Examine past patterns Understand the biology Cognitive-behavioral techniques  Increase self-worth Expand your social circle Educate yourself Avoid idealization practice mindfulness Follow Leah Lamarr https://www.instagram.com/leahlamarr https://sociatap.com/leahlamarr/  Show Love to Our Sponsors Zoc Doc Go to Zocdoc.com/LOVERS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE Hello Fresh Go to http://HelloFresh.com/50lovers and use code 50lovers for 50% off plus free shipping Skims Try The Cotton collection and more are available now at http://SKIMS.com Plus, get free shipping on orders over seventy five dollars!  Extras in this episode The Art of Manipulation: Influence Human Behavior, Understand the Psychology of Manipulation, Effectively Manage People, and Get What You (Really) Want!  Follow Shan: http://instagram.com/shanboody http://tiktok.com/shanboody https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Therapist Nina Westbrook shares insights on relationships and addresses people who say her NBA All Star husband could do better than her. They discuss the complexity of modern relationships in the social media age, the importance of commitment in a marriage, determining good relationships and avoiding toxic ones, misconceptions about basketball wives, and the importance of confidence and meeting each other's needs.

Here’s what men don't tell you about how to be a better intimate partner…How do you get your man to go from bland to blazing in bed? Why should men stop watching porn? How do you encourage your man to ask for what he wants in bed? Are you missing out on pleasure by not using breathwork? Alex Grendi is a certified men’s sex coach who specializes in performance anxiety and erectile dysfunction. He’s here to talk about the importance of asking for what you want in the bedroom AND the struggle (especially for men) of figuring out what that REALLY is. Some of you have mentioned that you like the longer solo interview episodes and that’s what this is.  Follow Alex Grendi  www.youtube.com/@alex.grendi www.superiorlovers.com email - alex@superiorlovers.com Thanks to our Sponsors Liquid IV http://LIQUIDIV.COM using the promo code LOVERS at checkout for a 20% Skims http://skims.com Dipsea http://DipseaStories.com/LOVERS Get an extended 30 day free trial  Hello Fresh http://HelloFresh.com/50lovers and use code 50lovers for 50% off plus 15% off the next 2 months! Follow Shan: http://instagram.com/shanboody http://tiktok.com/shanboody https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Seema Anand, expert on the Kama Sutra, enlightens us on the true purpose of the text beyond sex positions. They explore cultural stigmas surrounding women's pleasure and their personal journeys towards empowerment. The chapter delves into different sexual positions, the pressure men face regarding orgasm, and the art of foreplay in the Kama Sutra.

This week I needed some breathing room so I brought in my ventilator aka husband Jared Brady. Listen to Pick a Side  https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4sasTfLuqSzV6hxtYKWSPu?si=12a9d1fbf6434ebe Thanks to Our Sponsor Hello Fresh Go to http://HelloFresh.com/50lovers and use code 50lovers for 50% off plus 15% off the next 2 months!

What does it take to get you in the mood? Maybe like some it’s strawberries and silk. Or maybe like many others, it’s a little more … nuanced than that. Jonathan Singletary and my husband Jared Brady teamed up to make a sexy song devoted to the women who do a lot and consequently, need a little more to get…there. When it comes to being horny aka getting in the mood, this conversation is often about what you can do to get there, but in this episode we go into what has to first be done, OR in some cases undone for it to become feasible for all parties. Getting horny seems simple when we look at it through a Super Bad lens, but when we insert real people with real lives we can appreciate this complex process that relies on an interplay of neurological, hormonal, emotional, and physiological cooperation. Thanks to Our Sponsors Ritual http://Ritual.com/LOVERS Ritual is offering my listeners 20% off during your first month FabFitFun http://FabFitFun.com/LOVERS Sign up at, customize your box, and get access to discounts up to 70% off on brands like Fenty, Free People, and Our Place - to name a few.  Dipsea http://DipseaStories.com/LOVERS Dipsea is offering an extended 30 day FREE trial  MOOD: https://linktr.ee/jsingletary Follow our guests Jonathan Singletary https://www.instagram.com/jonathansingletary https://linktr.ee/jsingletary Elaine Welteroth https://www.instagram.com/elainewelteroth https://www.washingtonpost.com/advice/2023/02/14/ask-elaine-husband-new-mom-less-attracted/ Jared Brady http://instagram.com/enjoyjaredbrady Follow Shan: http://instagram.com/shanboody http://tiktok.com/shanboody https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng

Finding the one is a life quest, one that many people never complete. Some people don’t pick anyone, some people pick the wrong one, and some give up hope looking for the one and start considering the two, three, four or five… There’s no shame in this, especially when you both acknowledge this choice not to settle, but to secure the future you want by selecting a partner who may not tick all of your boxes, but you know that in time and when you’re both ready to make a mutual commitment - you just might be able make it work with them. This acknowledgement that I’m talking about often comes in the form of a marriage pact. A marriage pact is an agreement made by two people that states that if we are both still single by a certain due date, we will marry each other. People make these pacts for a number of reasons: fear of commitment or because the connection is right, but the timing isn’t. However in most cases, it’s an all-else fails backup plan. But, what happens when that fails to? Or perhaps even scarier - when the plan actually succeeds? Now what? That is what we are exploring on this episode of Lovers and Friends with the cast of The Marriage Pact streaming now on The Roku Channel. You can stream #TheMarriagePact FREE on a Roku, the Roku mobile app and http://therokuchannel.com. It’s also available on Samsung Smart TVs and Amazon Fire Sticks. Thanks to the sponsors of this episode  SKIMS Checkout the Cotton Collection and more at http://SKIMS.com they offer free shipping on orders over seventy-five bucks! Hello Fresh Go to http://HelloFresh.com/50lovers and use code 50lovers for an amazing 50% off plus free shipping! Liquid IV Get 20% off when you go to http://LIQUIDIV.com and use code LOVERS at checkout BetterHelp Visit http://BetterHelp.com/lovers today to get 10% off your first month.

Do you marry the person that you have the best sex with? Ashley Cobb opens up about being the best every man has ever had and also struggling to find a man who’s capable of having her. Plus the men previously known as Enjoy the Podcast link up to share their insights on the Madonna Whore complex. So, this complex describes a psychological phenomenon in which a man's perception of women is divided into two distinct categories: the Madonna and the whore. The Madonna is perfect, pure, and really caring. She's the nurturing type and has qualities like innocence and morality. This side of the complex is associated with safety, comfort, and connection. The whore, on the other hand, is associated with sexual desire, sensuality, and eroticism. This side of the complex involves fantasies or desires for more adventurous or taboo experiences and whores are seen as mysterious and unpredictable.  If men have this complex and subscribe to its ideologies that a woman is either pure innocence or pure erroticism, it makes it tough for him to see one woman as both a sexual partner and someone he could have a real, serious relationship with. Watch full videos of Lovers and Friends podcast https://www.youtube.com/@loversandfriendspodcast Thanks to the sponsors of this episode HoneyLove Get 20% Off your entire order (including the best bra you’ll own) with our exclusive link  http://honeylove.com/LOVERS. Babbel Ready to learn another language? Get up to 55% off at http://Babbel.com/LOVERS Rules and restrictions may apply FabFitFun Sign up at http://FabFitFun.com/LOVERS to get access to discounts up to 70% off on brands like Fenty, Free People, and Our Place - to name a few.  BetterHelp Visit http://BetterHelp.com/lovers today to get 10% off your first month Follow our guest Ashley Cobb https://www.instagram.com/sexwithashley/

Would you consider yourself a freak? Being freaky means you are open and willing to experiment and experience a variety of sexual activities.  That's what we are getting into this episode. Where do you scale on the levels of freaky? I’m joined by Andrea Lewis whom you may recognize from Degrassi or if you are a 90s baby then you may remember her for role in Cadet Kelly on the Disney Channel. Andrea’s latest starring role is “Three Ways”  which you can watch now on Hulu.  I am also joined by Tyomi,  a sexologist and sex therapist with over 12 years of experience.  She specializes in unlocking pleasure for clients and has over 140 million views on her youtube channel and she’s here to tell us about her definition of a freak. Thanks to the sponsors of this episode! Hello Fresh! Try out America’s #1 meal kit for yourself! Get 50% off plus free shipping! https://www.hellofresh.com/50lovers Zocdoc Download the app for free and find yourself a top-rated doctor! https://www.zocdoc.com/lovers Follow Shan: https://www.instagram.com/shanboodram https://www.tiktok.com/@shanboody https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com Follow Andrea:  https://www.instagram.com/andrealewis https://www.instagram.com/blackbeautyeffect/ Watch Three Ways on Hulu:  https://www.hulu.com/movie/three-ways-7afd18f4-5b2c-4097-b532-bd956aa21bd4 Follow Tyomi:  https://www.instagram.com/realglamazontyomi/ https://www.youtube.com/glamerotica101

What if I told you that the biggest turn off for partners can be your own self deprecating comments? The times you’ve said “oh no I haven’t shaved”   Have you ever wondered how your insecurities can affect your relationships? Self deprecating comments and insecurities play a vital role in how we interact with others, especially when it comes to intimacy. Remember that one time you excused yourself with your partner because you hadn’t shaved? Chances are you pointed out the elephant in the room that was only existent to you.  In this week’s episode, I am joined by Jessie Paege, a YouTube personality, actress, author, and entrepreneur. Through her comedic and relatable content, she has built an audience of over 2 million followers across her social channels. Jessie uses her platform to crush stereotypes and raise awareness of mental health issues and LGBTQ+ issues. Her debut book is called, Hey, It's Okay to Be You, which fits perfectly with our conversation about how insecurities play a role in our relationships.  Thanks to the sponsors of this episode!  OneSkin:  Get 15% off OneSkin with the code LOVERS at https://www.oneskin.co/ #oneskinpod #ad Ritual: There’s no more shame in your gut game. Get 20% off your first month.  Visit: https://www.ritual.com/lovers Factor: Try Factor meals and get 50%off by visiting:  https://www.factormeals.com/lovers50 Follow Shan https://www.instagram.com/shanboodram https://www.tiktok.com/@shanboody https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qng loversfriendspodcast@gmail.com Follow Jessie:  https://www.youtube.com/@jessiepaege https://www.instagram.com/jessiepaege/ https://www.tiktok.com/@jessiepaege