Cheaper Than Therapy with Vanessa and Dené

In this episode of Cheaper than Therapy the Podcast, we’re answering a question submitted by one of our listeners that doesn’t feel respected in their relationship, especially in times of conflict or disagreement. They write, “Sometimes I feel like my partner doesn’t respect me when she’s upset; she swears and can get very upset. How do I deal with this?”If you have a question you’d like us to discuss, click here. 🌟 Some Big Takeaways from this Episode:Safe Communication: The importance of being in relationship where it is safe for you to have difficult communication with your partnerAlone Not Lonely: How to be alone with yourself to get clear about how you will and will not be treated, to set boundaries within your relationshipFollow-Through: Taking in your partners response to your boundaries as information to help you decide if you want to accept how they are willing to love you and stay in relationship with themBooks Mentioned:Fair Play🎙This podcast is definitely Cheaper than Therapy🌐 Dive Deeper Into The Show: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@cheaperthantherapypodcast  Instagram: @cheaperthantherapythepodcast TikTok: @cheaperthantherapypod Connect with Vanessa: Instagram: @vanessasbennett TikTok: @thecodayoda YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@vanessabennettlmft5631  Connect with Dené: Instagram: @dene.logan TikTok: @denelogan Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT is a teacher, clinician, researcher, and developer of the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy® (PACT). He speaks and teaches around the world on secure-functioning relationships – how to understand them, create them, and support them, has written dozens of academic articles and six bestselling books, and is a TEDx Speaker. We sat down with Stan to explore:1. Why it is so important for couples to come to a shared agreement about what they are attempting to build 2. The importance of a couple being differentiated before attempting to find a sense of secure functioning 3. The preparation required for couples when shifting from a dyad to a triad in a family system 4. Why commuting to another person gives us an opportunity to know ourselves well through the activations that inevitable come to the surface Connect with Stan:*** Instagram *** WebsiteIf you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!And, if you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this Q&A episode, a listener writes, “My friend uses pronouns that I don’t agree with and I’m not sure what to do. Is it necessary to keep the friendship honest?”We discuss:Challenging ourselves to be brutally honest with ourselves first, and how we get clear about what’s underneath our intentions for wanting to speak up. Owning the possibility that we may feel like there’s a right and wrong way for others to be, and that we may have a subconscious desire to express to a friend that they’re wrong.The importance of checking in with ourselves about how we often begin to show up in a similar energetic to the thing that we are holding with contempt in our space of certainty that others are wrong in their perspectives.And so much more!If you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!And, if you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In today’s episode, we’re addressing some of the responses we received on social media around what it means to live an untamed life.We’re discussing:Why we sometimes feel the need to sweep things under the rug and not speak up in order to please the people around us, and how it inadvertently keeps our relationships inauthentic instead of giving us the security we’re looking for.How we oftentimes feel constrained to a certain way of living, and the importance of digging deep to discover those constraints live within our own mind and that those external pressures can be removed.  That when we are truly our most authentic self, that is how our people find us, and how we reframe our mind to look for things that validate our Self. And so much more!If you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!And, if you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this Q&A episode, a listener tells us they’re struggling with their recent rapid weight gain, and the negative reinforcement from their partners remarks about how proud they’d be if they regained their previous body type. We talk about:Every person having a right to bodily autonomy in all facets, the right to show up in their life exactly as they areHow, as a partner, it’s our role to ask what that person wants and where they are in the process, rather than projecting what we think is right for themThe need to reach within ourselves and find resilience, so we don’t become enmeshed and codependent on others, and getting comfortable with the idea that maybe not all relationships are meant to continue if you are no longer in alignmentIf you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!And, if you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Richie Reseda is a feminist ally, community organizer, recording artist, and founder of the social-impact record label, Question Culture. Success Stories, the anti-patriarchy organization he started while incarcerated, was chronicled in the CNN documentary “The Feminist on Cell Block Y.” He changes California prison policy with Initiate Justice, an organization he co-founded in prison. 🌟 Some Key Points from this Conversation with Richie:1. His role in introducing Bell Hooks’ work to incarcerated men as a way to illustrate and push back on the “Soul murder” a patriarchal society demands of men2. How to teach our children to understand the truth of their power so they can learn to reach for love and safety over fear, vs the false ideations this society has conditioned them about where their power lies3. Why our work is not to strive for reform, but rather the abolition of the colonial system we’re currently living in4. The importance of understanding that society’s ‘rules of governance’ are essentially violence that perpetuates more violence, given that they are not collaborative and created with a community’s and consent 5. Why the patriarchal narrative of right and wrong or ‘good and bad’ always equate to a form of domination, and why the evolution of a Soul-based societal perspective is rooted in curiosity, consent, and community collaboration You can see Richie in the CNN documentary “The Feminist on Cell Block Y”Connect with RichieInstagramQuestion Culture InstagramFor Everyone Collective Instagram🎙This podcast is definitely Cheaper than Therapy🌐 Dive Deeper Into The Show: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@cheaperthantherapypodcast  Instagram: @cheaperthantherapythepodcast TikTok: @cheaperthantherapypod Connect with Vanessa: Instagram: @vanessasbennett TikTok: @thecodayoda YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@vanessabennettlmft5631  Connect with Dené: Instagram: @dene.logan TikTok: @denelogan Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Martha Barnard-Rae helps outside-the-box brands build seriously good client relationships with clear, clever copywriting and content. By day she's the CEO at Word Candy and co-host of The One That Works For You podcast. Martha moonlights as a feminist scholar, TEDx speaker, and sore loser of board games. Setting boundaries is her superpower. Her love language is oddly specific Tik Toks. We sat down with Martha to talk about: The shame that tends to be internalized with ADHD and the strategies that can be put in place for support. The connection between women having children and being diagnosed with ADHD, and what that entails while also living in a capitalistic society.The extent to which neurotypical and neurodivergent brains process information and sensory inputs very differently, and why communicating to understand one another is key for fulfilling relationshipsAnd more!Connect with MarthaWebsiteInstagramTEDx TalkMentioned:ADHD 2.0And, if you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!If you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In today’s solo episode, a reader wrote in because she believes people can remain friends after a romantic relationship, but her partner does not share her sentiments. She asked to hear our thoughts. We talk about: Why the suggestion that heterosexual men and women can’t be just friends enforces the patriarchal narrative that men are only interested in sex, and that women have nothing valuable to offer a relationship other than something physicalHow romantic possessiveness causes us to outsource our sense of self-worth and safety by reinforcing the idea that if you’ve been “chosen” for a relationship this person will never be attracted to someone else and you are “safe,” rather than finding safety within yourselfThe value in sitting down and asking yourself, “If I really believe my partner would cheat on me, why am I in a relationship with them?” And more!And, if you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!If  you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we  just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rachelle Indra is a life coach and speaker specializing in the intersection of self-actualization and humor. She has made it her life's mission to teach the shit we should have been taught in school: how to have healthy relationships, discover your life's purpose, and how to retrain your brain to work for you instead of against you.We sat down with Rachelle to talk about:Recognizing that different people require different types of support and may be intimidated by the stigmas that surround therapy; and why a life coach can offer a means to bridge that gapThe power of combining science and the metaphysical world, and how we can reframe our thoughts to manifest what aligns with our truest selfHow we shift the conversation around the choice to be child free or become a mother, and acknowledging that our current societal structures make parenting incredibly difficult in ways that are rarely spoken about And so much more!Connect with Rachelle*** Website*** Instagram*** LinkedInAnd, if you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!If you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In this solo episode, we’re answering a listener’s question about why they seem to attract “energy vampires” and feel like they’re constantly being sucked into others’ drama. We’re discussing:Reshifting your energy from, “why is this person always doing this TO me” to, “that’s challenging for them, but I don’t need to participate” and remembering that where you focus your energy is what you attractTurning your focus inward to examine where you may have hidden shadow work that you are bypassing, and hiding behind the “drama” in others’ livesRecognizing that your time and energy is your responsibility, and that at any point you’re able to reclaim your power by setting boundaries and removing yourself from circles that don’t align with your pathAnd so much more!And, if you love the conversations we’re bringing you as much as we do, please rate and write a review of the podcast so we can get the podcast out to even more people!If you want to connect with us personally and deepen your work, we just launched our private online Cheaper Than Therapy Community. Weekly process groups on multiple topics, two live workshops a month, one on one interaction with us and an amazing supportive community. Learn more hereWe are so excited to announce that we’ve decided to offer a weekend immersive weekend in IDYLLWILD, CA - July 14-16! join us for: LIVING AN UNTAMED LIFEDuring this intensive weekend, we’ll support you in:⁃ Exploring the origin points of the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back ⁃ Understanding how to begin to step into the process of trusting ourselves fully⁃ Cultivating tangible tools for shifting into a growth mindset and building a greater sense of self-awareness  ⁃ Crafting a vision of what you want your life to look like and practices that can support you in being the creator of this realitySpots will be limited! Click here for details------------------------------This podcast is, for sure, Cheaper Than Therapy. Follow Cheaper Than Therapy on Instagram Follow VanessaInstagramTikTokYouTube Follow Dené InstagramTikTok----------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.