The Better Sex Podcast ~ Unfiltered Conversations

Thea grew up in a traditional family where she was taught nothing about sex/intimacy/relating to others formally. She learned what she saw, did what she was told, and followed the path that she was promised would produce success... but when that path left her a newly divorced, stay-at-home mom of two kids in her late 20s, she decided it was time to try something different. On her quest to learn who she was outside of the role of "mom", she learned to love and listen to herself again. This gave her the power she needed to completely redefine herself, her career, and her sexuality. Now, Thea takes her clients through the same process of rediscovery. In this episode Thea and I explore some of the most effective approaches to rediscovering yourself and crafting intimacy in your life - both in and out of the bedroom. Join Thea and me as we discuss: the lightbulb moment that began her journey of self-discovery the importance of having a community during a period of transformation how to honor (and not feel guilty about) the things you love common intimacy challenges couples face what to do when it feels like you're losing yourself in a relationship why putting yourself first is vital to sustaining your other relationships what "winning" in a relationship looks like About Thea: Thea Jansky holds her Masters of Arts Degree in Integrative Health & Healing and was trained as a Sex & Relationship Coach out in Berkeley, CA. she is Certified in Codependency Recovery and trained in Conflict Management, Resolution, Mediation, Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Complex Trauma & the Nervous System. She lives in Connecticut with her husband and two daughters. Connect with Thea Website: https://www.theasexandrelationships.com/\ Email: intimacyandrelationships@gmail.com Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

Our guests' beginnings - Suzannah with a political and military background and Andre with a focus on love and relationships - couldn't be more different, but their meeting transformed their lives. When their traditional marriages ended and forced them to look at how they wanted to live for the first time in a long time, they found each other again and vowed to explore new ways of building relationships and relationship dynamics. Eight years later, Suzannah and Andre work together healing, coaching, and offering guidance to those navigating ethical non-monogamy. In this episode, we explore what ethical non-monogamy means, get tools and practices to navigate it well, and hear how to handle conflict constructively in both monogamous and non-monogamous relationships Join Suzannah, Andre, and me as we discuss: What ethical non-monogamy actually is The subjective nature of relationship definitions Tools and practices to navigate ethical non-monogamy successfully What rom-coms have wrong about jealousy Attachment styles and how they affect the way we relate to each other Using attachment styles to spice up your sex life Owning your emotions and making tough conversations easy to have Scheduling your love life The benefits of broadening your sexual and relationship horizons What to do when jealousy is triggered in ethical non-monogamy About Suzannah and Andre: Andre Lazarus and Susannah Rose have been coaches and healers over 10+ years, bringing a unique and open perspective to relationship dynamics and helping people expand their capacity of understanding. With a combined 16 years of experience in Consensual Non Monogamous (CNM) dynamics, they are bringing their lessons and tools learned over years of navigating open relationship dynamics through a brand new fully loaded online course coming in April! Learn more at comingcloser.carrd.co/ and follow comingcloserwithandre on IG. Connect with Suzannah and Andre: Website: comingcloser.carrd.co/ Course: opentomore.mykajabi.com/readytoopen Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

When it comes to embodying our power, discovering what we want, and honoring our emotions, there are SO many awesome resources out there for women… but our men often get left out of these conversations This week's guest, Karen Brody, is on a mission to fix that by giving men the space, permission, and support to connect with their potential and power. If you're a man ready to get what you want from a relationship AND awaken your women's desire - or if you're a lady looking to better connect with your man - this episode is for you. Join Karen and me as we discuss: Karen's journey to becoming a sex coach for men The behind-the-scenes process of writing a best-selling book Balancing the masculine and feminine Giving men permission to hold boundaries and honor their emotions The power of setting boundaries - especially in the face of what society expects of your gender Respect vs. Love What happens when a relationship lacks respect The biggest thing that makes men feel valued How to become a better listener for your partner Being direct about what you want How to handle criticism in your relationship Building up your partner's confidence Constructively working through conflict and miscommunication Why we need self-respect - and how to get it About Karen: Karen Brody is a Man Coach, and the best-selling author of "Open Her: Activate 7 Masculine Powers to Arouse your Woman's Love & Desire." Karen ́s passion is to awaken the hidden potential and power in men, to lead in life and in love, and to give men the keys for how to awaken a woman's heart and her desire. Connect with Karen Website: https://karenbrodycoaching.com/ Get your copy of Karen's Best-Selling Book: https://www.amazon.com/Open-Her-Activate-Masculine-Powers/dp/0692273476/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&linkCode=sl1&tag=dlbds04-20&linkId=0ebff1548702fdae29c57d3325eb1abf&language=en_US Connect with Deborah Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

Over the course of her life, LiSara has been everything from a forensic linguist to a performer, to a trade show marketer, to a leadership coach. Though her life has called her to many different roles and places, her varied experience revealed one constant truth: sound is powerful. As a relationship coach, LiSara witnessed sound's power to heal trauma. As a leadership coach, she marveled at how sound provided her clients an access point to their authentic selves and inner wisdom. During her performances, she's consistent Now, LiSara has made it her mission to understand our relationship with sound and harness its power to improve others' lives through sound healing. In this episode, we cover how using your voice and playing with sound can lead to better sex. Join LiSara and me as we discuss: What sound healing is - and why it works How sound healing interacts with different types of therapy Tapping into your internal compass through sound Playing with sound in ways that enhance sex Why we NEED to stop faking orgasms The science behind why sound has such an effect on the human body How learning about voice can improve your relationship with yourself Finding everyday pleasure through sound Sound conditioning and the sexiest frequencies The Sexy Sound Healing program About LiSara: She hails from a rich ancestry of both medicine women and Civil Rights educators who worked with Martin Luther King Jr in the 1960s. She also was the first woman of color (WOC) in the United States to graduate as a forensic linguist, training with the FBI agent who broke the Unabomber case of the 1990s. Global audiences as large as 15,000 have witnessed her dynamic, multilingual live performances. LiSára founded Sexy Sound Healing (SSH), the world's 1st personalized sound healing app & community platform for the spiritually-led to experience their divinity, sensuality, and prosperity through the healing frequencies of sound. She speaks multiple languages and lives on the California coast with her partner. Connect with LiSara Website: https://www.sexysoundhealing.com/ Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

Buckle up, sexy spirits! This episode is a transformative one. This week's guest Spirit Child is a revolutionary somatic practitioner who has never been a fan of the boxes we put ourselves in. They've made it their life's work to help people find liberation from stereotypes and shame - inside and outside of the bedroom. In this episode, Spirit explores how ancestry and culture assign stereotypes and shares ways we can responsibly acknowledge, heal, and free ourselves from those stereotypes. Join Spirit and me as we discuss: What being a revolutionary matriarch means Exploring your masculine and feminine energy with yourself and your partner - regardless of gender The benefits of being side-by-side, instead of face-to-face, with your partner Why pronouns are important The evolution of labels how we can stay mindful and flexible with the language we use identity and how it differs from who we like and what we do how masculinity shows up in different parts of society Spirit's own journey with masculinity the disconnection prejudice creates the self-fulfilling prophecy of stereotypes healing racism from the root how to heal and unpack the psychological effects of stereotypes in the bedroom How our ancestry affects the way we engage in relationships and narratives About Spirit: Spirit is a rEvolutionary Somatica practitioner incorporating elements of sensuality, sexuality, spirituality and the various "realities" (our society and daily practical challenges) to holistically obtain desired effects of eroticism and greater intimate relations with self and the world that surrounds us. Spirit has 30 years of experience as a spiritual advisor and counselor along with; community organizing, mentorship, prison/school/community workshops on arts and exploration of another world for the liberation of all beings, being an international touring freedom singer (musician) who devotes songs that speak to liberation and a pedagogue that assist with the professional development with individuals as well as organizations. spirit has a B.A. in Psychology and Communications. Spirit offers experiential sex and relation guidance (coaching) working with parents/partners, lovers, rEvolutionaries and those seeking to improve their ever growing and loving relations providing tools to assist with self awareness, repair, inner child and having the sex and intimate relations you want and that are right for you. We explore a mutually vulnerable experience while creating a *relation lab. we practice intimate relations starting with self and with others. this method is inspired and explored with the tools of the Somatica Institute. we will add various healing methods infused offering services on embodiment, sexuality and relationships. Connect with Spirit: Linktr.ee: https://linktr.ee/soulsensespirit Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

When Lindy James walked into her first Tantra event with her friends, she really didn't know what to expect. Did Tantra require you to be naked? Would she be having sex? What the heck was she getting herself into? But instead of finding the intimidating orgies she had pictured, Lindy found a place of healing, empowerment, and freedom. She left that event knowing she needed to be a part of this world - and to make this world more accessible to others like her. A decade later, Lindy James serves as a counselor, intimacy coach, and healer in the Tantric space. In this episode, she debunks some common myths about Tantra, explores how to use Tantra to facilitate healing, and provides strategies on how to become better at listening to what your body needs. Join Lindy and me as we discuss: Lindy's journey from Tantra newbie to a respected Puja leader How to keep the "spark" alive in relationships Offering love through your body Tapping into sacred love The importance (and sexiness) of setting boundaries How to discuss fears and boundaries with your partner What sacred sexuality really means Chakras and your sex life Deepening your connection with your partner How to identify your body's feelings of "yes" and "no" How being willing to disappoint your partner can actually improve your sex life Tantra in the age of COVID Practicing embodiment in everyday life About Lindy: Lindy James is a counselor, intimacy coach, and sexual healer. She is a Certified Tantric Educator, Hakomi graduate, and 25-year Tantra practitioner. Lindy offers sessions in the 'Art of Conscious Intimacy' for individuals, couples, and groups. Lindy James is a woman gracefully in touch with her intuitive wisdom. She believes in the importance of healing ourselves by facing the truth, developing clearer communication, and nurturing deep self-love. Connect with Lindy Website: https://lindyjames.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLfe_bopfLeqzKBQR_1scYg Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PermissionzonewithLindyJames Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

Better Art = Better Sex? Does becoming a better artist make you better at sex? And does becoming better at sex make you better at art? According to this week's guest, Artist and Sex Coach Rafael Martinez, the answer to both questions is yes - and he's here to show us how that's possible. In this episode, Rafael and I explore the relationship between sex and art, what Kundalini energy has to do with both, and how we can use both to heal ourselves and feel more fulfilled. Join Rafael and me as we discuss: The impact our creativity has on our relationships What Kundalini energy is and how it affects art and sex The mind-body connection Why numbing emotions doesn't work - and what to do instead\ How to use emotional intelligence to learn about our bodies Dealing with the "inner critic" - both in and out of the bedroom What to do when fear kicks in The connection between sex and art Rafael's recommended technique for better sex How to "practice" sex Having compassion and patience with yourself on your sexual journey About Rafael: Rafael Martinez, born in Colombia and raised in New York City, has been an artist all his life and a coach for over nine years. He's been doing transformational work for well over thirteen years. Rafael is skilled in subtly penetrating and identifying the heart of his clients' desires and helping them live their lives guided by that desire. Rafael has also expanded this skill to coach artists and people in relationships. He helps them access deeper passion and live with more connection to the deeper things that make life fulfilling. Connect with Rafael: Email: rafael.martinez.coaching@gmail.com Website: rafaelmartinezcoaching.com Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com Book your free Truth and Clarity Session at https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

After leaving a sexless marriage at age 30, Sky Studley felt adrift. Her body was changing, she was a single mom, and she felt more disconnected from herself and others than ever before. Sky tried therapy, but it wasn't until she learned about sex and relationship coaching that her body was able to start processing things. Only then did her healing really start to begin. Now a Life and Relationship Coach, Sky supports people navigating big life transitions and anxiety - especially in the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities. In this episode, she shares how anxiety shows up in intimacy and gives us some ways to help ourselves and others through anxious moments in the bedroom… and beyond. Join Sky and me as we discuss: How anxiety shows up in sex, intimacy, and connection Common challenges anxious people experience with sex and intimacy Tools and strategies to handle anxiety in the bedroom Tips for creating intimacy with an anxious person How different attachment styles are affected by anxiety Ways to use love languages to calm your anxious partner How to tell if someone wants to be with you but is just shy Starting intimate, vulnerable conversations while shy (or with someone who is shy) About Sky: Sky Studley, Life & Relationship Coach, is the founder of OpenSkySpace.com. Sky supports people going through major life transitions such as divorce & separation, life cycles of parenthood, opening up relationships, coming out, those at the end of life or grieving the loss of a loved one. She is also very passionate about supporting marginalized groups and provides discounted rates for lower-income BIPOCs. Connect with Sky Website: https://www.openskyspace.com/ Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com Book your free Truth and Clarity Session at https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

I often talk about my Leather Daddy or my BDSM mentor I am beyond thrilled to have Ken as my guest. Though he's always had a love for tying people up, Ken Zane didn't connect with the BDSM aspect of this affinity until he was stationed in Germany. There, he found an amazing community that introduced him to BDSM play - and unlocked his passion for being Dominant. But the more BSDM communities Ken explored, the more he found a lot of other Doms played in very unsafe, inattentive ways. So, Ken did what any good soldier would do - he formed a lesson plan. Ken traveled around the country teaching Doms everything from how to build trust, use tools, and become a better communicator during play. In this episode, he takes us through some of his most essential teachings and gives us an insider look at what makes up a REALLY good BDSM dynamic. Join Ken and me as we discuss: playing dominant and submissive at parties on Capitol Hill why surrendering yourself to power and submission can feel so freeing the sexiness of solid boundaries how BDSM & sex relate to each other what needs to happen to ensure a positive and safe BDSM experience the importance of trust and communication in BDSM how to check in with each other - without ruining the moment what most Doms get wrong about being dominant How Ken's experience in the military affects his Dominance style Connect with Ken DCBlade@aol.com is good. Connect with Deborah Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat

The Three Keys to Great Sex and Fulfilling Relationships This week's incredible guest, Sheba, Queen of the Night, began her career as a traditional stage actress, but a fated performance of the Vagina Monologues changed everything. That show became her life for the next 11 years, and opened her up to a world of sex, dance, creativity, pleasure, and kinks in the process. Now an Erotic Artist and Sex & Intimacy coach, Sheba spends her days teaching others how to fill their lives with good sex and fulfilling relationships. In this episode, she shares the pillars of her philosophy on fulfilling sex, gives us some fascinating ways to apply them, and takes us through how to let your personality shine through your sensuality. Join Sheba and me as we discuss: Her journey from actress to performance artist… to entertainer to model to erotic artist to sex & intimacy coach (Sheba really does it all!) Finding joy in - and reconnecting with - your body A burlesque exercise that can benefit anyone's sex life How to explore your own sensuality The multi-dimensional benefits of moaning Where yoga and sensuality meet How to be more present - and why you should About Sheba: Sheba is a Sex & Intimacy Coach and Erotic Artist located in St. Petersburg, FL. As a practitioner of Body Joy Intimacy School, she works with clients virtually and in-person for one-on-one coaching sessions around relationships, sexuality, exploration, and body positivity. She leads kink-friendly/queer-friendly workshops encouraging intimacy building and creating a playful, explorative, exciting dynamic in your sex life. Connect with Sheba Website: https://www.shebaqueenofthenight.com/sex-coach Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexposisheba/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/shebaQOTNentertainment/ Connect with Deborah: Send your sex and relationship questions to DeborahTantraKat@Gmail.com For a free Truth and Clarity Session https://www.deborahkat.com/appointments-3 Website: https://www.deborahkat.com/ Email: deborahtantrakat@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.tantrakat Twitter: https://twitter.com/TantraKat