Episode Title: No More Mr. Nice Guy - How to stop people pleasing and get the love, life and connection you want.    Guest: Dr. Robert Glover, renowned psychotherapist, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy, and founder of Integration Nation, a men’s community fostering authentic masculinity and growth. His Big Idea: Authentic growth begins by breaking free from the "Nice Guy Syndrome," a deeply ingrained pattern of people-pleasing and self-sabotage rooted in toxic shame and unmet childhood needs.  Transformation happens when men take responsibility for their needs, embrace boundaries, and cultivate relationships that foster mutual respect and genuine connection. Dr. Glover encourages men to pursue an integrated life by owning all aspects of themselves, both their light and shadow, and creating a community that empowers healthy masculinity. Dr. Robert Glover, a leading voice in men’s personal development, shares his transformative insights on overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome. Drawing on decades of therapeutic experience and his personal journey, Dr. Glover unpacks the origins of this syndrome and its impact on men’s relationships, careers, and overall well-being. He provides practical guidance on embracing conflict, setting boundaries, and cultivating meaningful connections that are free of manipulation and resentment. Through engaging anecdotes, insightful theories, and actionable advice, Dr. Glover challenges men to reclaim their power by confronting their toxic shame, embracing their full selves, and stepping into the world as integrated, authentic individuals. Key Insights: The Roots of Nice Guy Syndrome The Origins of Toxic Shame: Many men internalize feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness during childhood, creating a belief that they must earn love by pleasing others and avoiding conflict. Covert Contracts: These unconscious "if-then" agreements—like “If I’m a good guy, I’ll be loved”—are manipulative, unsustainable, and often lead to frustration, resentment, and passive aggression. Breaking Free from Limiting Patterns Releasing Shame: Men must work to uncover and release the toxic shame that fuels their need to seek external validation. Dr. Glover highlights the importance of safe spaces, like therapy and men’s groups, to facilitate this process. Setting Boundaries: Boundaries aren’t about controlling others—they’re about defining how we want to be treated. Masterful boundaries create space for authentic connection by inviting everyone involved into higher consciousness. Building the Integrated Man Integrating All Aspects of Self: Growth happens when men accept and integrate all parts of themselves, including their vulnerabilities, fears, and even their “inner jerk.” This integration fosters authenticity and confidence. Cultivating Brotherhood: Men thrive when they have strong, supportive relationships with other men. Dr. Glover emphasizes the importance of mentorship, collaboration, and shared growth in fostering healthy masculinity.   Notable Quotes: “Toxic shame operates like a hidden operating system—it runs the show, but you don’t even know it’s there.” “Boundaries are not about pushing people away; they’re about creating space for real intimacy.” “I swim in a sea of love. Love rains down on me.” “If you want to master something, teach it.”   Resources Mentioned: Books: No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida   Connect with Dr. Robert Glover: Website: drglover.com Community: integrationnation.net   Thank You for Listening!  

Bryan Franklin, a leading executive coach known for his impactful methods, shares his secrets to being a great coach. He emphasizes the importance of love, presence, and creating safe spaces for clients to explore their truths. Franklin discusses how truly effective coaching involves understanding diverse perspectives and fostering authentic connections. He also touches on the journey of coaching, highlighting the value of flexibility and emotional awareness. Through personal stories, he showcases how failures can lead to significant transformations.

Jonny Miller, a nervous system specialist and transformational coach, shares his insights on mastering the nervous system for peak performance. He discusses how regulating stress responses can significantly improve emotional balance and resilience. Miller highlights the importance of breathwork and practices like meditation in handling emotional overwhelm. He also explores the concept of emotional debt, emphasizing the need to process feelings to navigate life’s challenges. With a blend of personal narrative and scientific insights, he offers practical strategies for building inner strength.

Raz Ingrasci, Chairman of the Hoffman Institute, brings over 40 years of human development expertise to discuss the transformative Hoffman Process. He dives into how childhood conditioning gives rise to 'Negative Love Syndrome,' influencing adult behaviors. Raz emphasizes compassion towards oneself as a vital tool for emotional healing and personal growth. He shares practical strategies for breaking negative patterns and achieving authenticity, underscoring the link between self-awareness and emotional freedom.

Today's guest is Annie Lala. Annie is one of the top relationship experts and coaches on the planet. I am very fortunate to have called her my relationship coach through my 11 year marriage, my recent divorce, and now with my new partner Melissa. I would not be in the happy co-parenting relationship I currently an with Miki (my ex) without her love and support. She is truly world class at helping people to work through really difficult challenges and conflict in their relationships. She's a master at the technical and the practical.... the rituals, communication techniques that help people to stay in love and cultivate inspiring partnerships. She's also just plain brilliant. She's able to talk about the esoteric and the mental models of love and relationship, with a fluidity and mastery that is interesting and deeply inspiring. She is one of my favorite people on the planet. She's a genius when it comes to creating and sustaining a love filled relationship. So ,whether you are already in the relationship of your dreams, or you want to build one in the future, Annie can help.

Jayson Gaddis, author of 'Getting to Zero', provides practical wisdom on conflict resolution in relationships. Key takeaways include taking ownership of actions, emphasizing feeling understood in conflict resolution, and finding inner harmony. They also discuss the concept of LUFU, or listening until the other person feels understood. The podcast explores advances in understanding relationships, navigating conflict, and the value of authentic connections.

Valter Longo is an Italian-American biologist and gerontologist who is a professor of gerontology and biological science at the University of Southern California. He is the director of the USC Longevity Institute and the Program on Longevity and Cancer at IFOM (FIRC Institute of Molecular Oncology) in Milan, Italy. Longo is known for his research on the biological mechanisms of aging, and for his work on fasting-mimicking diets, which he claims can promote health and longevity. He has written several books on the subject, including "The Longevity Diet" and "The Fasting Diet". Longo advocates for periodic fasting as a way to promote overall health and prevent disease. He believes that intermittent fasting, which involves limiting food intake to certain times of day or certain days of the week, can help reduce inflammation, improve metabolic health, and promote cellular repair and regeneration.   In today's episode, we focus on intermittent fasting. 

Jim McCann is the business leader, author, and philanthropist who founded 1-800-Flowers.com and grew the business from its roots as a single flower shop in Manhattan into the world's largest florist. With a passion for helping people deliver smiles, Jim transformed the flower and gift marketplace to help customers express themselves and connect with the important people in their lives.    Devoted to helping others, Jim founded the nonprofit organization Smile Farms to provide meaningful jobs to young adults and people with developmental disabilities. Jim also started the Connectivity Council, which brings together therapists, researchers, and thought leaders to share ideas and trends around human connection and community.

How have your friendships changed since COVID began?    How did your community shrink or expand?    Do you have more depth with less people?    If you want some help exploring these types of questions and the power of friendship in the age of loneliness, this is a great one.    - We explore the stats that break down the loneliness epidemic we are currently facing in America. - Tangible strategies for building friendships and community - Intro to facilitation and meaningful gathering - Two friends talking about the power of human connection

Michael Hebb is an innovative and influential cultural figure, entrepreneur and activist, described by the New York Times as an “underground restaurateur, impresario and provocateur.” He believes that the dinner table is one of the most effective (and overlooked) vehicles for changing the world. After teaching a University of Washington graduate course titled Let’s Have Dinner and Talk About Death, Michael started Death Over Dinner. This project was created as a gift, an invitation and a simple set of tools to help families and friends address the basic human fact that we are all, at some point, going to die. We suffer more when we don’t communicate our wishes, we suffer less when we know how to honor the wishes of our loved ones.  -- Michael is a partner at RoundGlass and the Founder of Deathoverdinner.org, Drugsoverdinner.org, EarthtoDinner.org, WomenTeachMen.org and The Living Wake. He currently serves as a Board Advisor at the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts; and in the recent past as Senior Advisor to Summit Series, Theo Chocolate, Learnist, Caffe Vita, CreativeLive, Architecture For Humanity, and Mosaic Voices Foundation .  In 1997 Hebb co-founded City Repair and Communitecture with architect Mark Lakeman, winning the AIA People's Choice Award for the Intersection Repair Project. In 1999 Michael and Naomi Pomeroy co-founded Family Supper in Portland, a supper club that is credited with starting the pop-up restaurant movement. In the years following they opened the restaurants clarklewis and Gotham Bldg Tavern, garnering international acclaim.  After leaving Portland, Hebb built Convivium/One Pot, a creative agency that specialized in the ability to shift culture through the use of thoughtful food and discourse based gatherings. Convivium's client list includes: The Obama Foundation, Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, TEDMED, The World Economic Forum, Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, Clinton Global Initiative, X Prize Foundation, The Nature Conservancy. Michael is the founding Creative Director of The City Arts Festival, the founder of Night School @ The Sorrento Hotel, the founder of www.seder.today and the founding Creative Director at the Cloud Room. He served as a Teaching Fellow at the Graduate School of Communication at University of Washington. His writings have appeared in USA TODAY, GQ, Food and Wine and numerous other publications. Michael can often be found speaking at universities and conferences, here is his TEDMED talk.