Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

Welcome to Week 7 of our Summer of Stories series! This Summer we have been featuring stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments. In this week’s story, you will hear from the delightful, creative and intentional Erin Burchik. She is a family friend and I have long-admired her approach to parenting. She desperately wants to enjoy each of her kids and embrace the “good ole days” of kids in the home. She will share how traveling and taking trips became a passion of hers. And she will share some super practical ways to make trips doable and affordable when you’re on a budget.Before we get to the scoop on traveling for less, she shares her story about becoming a mom. Through many trials and some devastating financial loss, Erin has fought through doubt and frustration with God. She felt called to adopt and then it didn’t go as smoothly as she had hoped. It’s so fun to see her on the other side of this battle and see the family that God designed from the very beginning. My favorite part is when she explains the WHY behind their family adventures. She’s not traveling to flex on Instagram or show off or waste money. She’s traveling because she wants to create memories with her kids, to carve out time to adventure together and to get out of their comfort zone. I love her approach!In this episode, we discuss:Erin’s journey to motherhood - foster care and adoptionHow to find community with other adopted familiesHow to exchange gifts for experiences at ChristmasHow to find creative ways to do big trips on a little budgetEnjoy!!CourtneyChapters00:00Introduction and Background04:02The Journey of Adoption08:57Building a Supportive Community18:13Creating Lasting Memories20:05Santa Bringing Christmas Trips22:10Maximizing Credit Card Points25:29Saving Thousands on Family Trips28:21Benefits of Traveling with Kids30:15Building Independence and Confidence33:31Enjoying Motherhood and Savoring the MomentsConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithResources from today’s show:StrongHeartErin’s InstagramErin’s travel site - Points For FamiliesErin’s book - Animals of the NativityErin’s book - The Bear HugTBRI for families that have adoptedPardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders communityOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When I engage with young moms, I often get asked a lot about alcohol. These women are wanting me to give them an “official answer” about how a Christian woman should handle alcohol. And I often don’t have the specific answer they want - because it is so often in the gray area. And only the person asking the question knows what’s going on under the issue.Today’s story is about a mom that got curious about her relationship with alcohol in her early 30s. As you hear her story, you will be inspired to take an honest assessment and just get curious about your relationship with alcohol. She called it “getting sober minded.” Although I don’t drink - I have my own vices which we discuss. I joke about my love of the phone, cookie dough and TJMaxx. If I’m honest, I often use those to outsource my comfort. This isn’t an episode for moms that drink - this is an episode for all of us. My favorite part is when Jenn shares about the benefits of operating in a sober mind. She reminds us that being present with our kids is worth the fight. Let’s lean into Jenn’s story together and be brave enough to hear what God is nudging us to do in response. Don’t forget to check in our Jenn’s community called Sober Sis and utilize all of the fantastic resources that are helping thousands of women become sober-minded and enjoy this life to the fullest!In this episode we chat about: Jenn’s journey with alcohol and finding a sober-minded lifeHow to pay attention to what God is saying to us directlyHow to get curious about areas of addiction in our livesHow to fight for presence with our families 00:00Introduction and Connection02:33Early Years and Introduction to Social Drinking05:46The Influence of Mommy Wine Culture07:41Outsourcing Comfort and Dealing with Anxiety09:44Questioning the Relationship with Drinking12:30Understanding the Mindset and Motivations Behind Drinking19:28Questioning Your Relationship with Drinking21:57Introduction: Jenn's Journey of Sobriety25:08The Importance of Addressing the Root Cause28:40Taking the First Step: Sobriety Curiosity33:28Shifting Mindset: Gaining, Not Giving Up39:11The Power of Community in Sobriety42:59Personal Growth and Sobriety45:07Conclusion: Encouragement for MomsConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithResources from today’s show: Sober Sis Home Page - ​Happy Hour Survival Guide - Free Guide​21 Day Reset Challenge Sober Sis - Facebook ​Sober Sis - Instagram​​Sober Sis 2024 Retreat ​ Look Alive, Sis! by Jenn Kautsch (book) - Little Habits, Big FaithPardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders communityOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy July 4th!This week’s story features my friend, Stacey Morgan, who is an astronaut’s wife! Her life is truly fascinating. Her family is currently living in the Marshall Islands which is 5 hours south of Hawaii. Stacey honestly shares the truth about loneliness. She has had to start over multiple times as a military spouse. I love her hard truth about loneliness: we have to make the first move. She also shares how her kids are thriving as they were uprooted from the cultural norm in Texas, and now live on an island with 1,200 people total. They are learning valuable life lessons about what’s most important.My favorite part is at the very end when she talks about her top learning as a mom of over 20 years. Her encouragement to “let go” was really timely for me. I am having trouble letting go of my oldest who is a rising senior. I need that reminder over and over again. In this episode, we chat about:How to navigate marriage when you are both strong leadersHow to start over when you move into a new city (or island! :)Why community matters in motherhoodHow to make friends as an adult woman What to do when you’re deeply lonelyChapters00:00Introduction and Background02:47Moving to the Marshall Islands05:58Supporting a Spouse's Career11:04Living in a Small Community15:01Transition and Loneliness23:57Supporting Military Spouses and Moms26:30The Importance of Community for Military Families31:16MomCo: Supporting Military Moms39:19Lessons in Trust and Letting Go44:28The Power of Grace and Understanding in ParentingConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithResources from today’s show:Stacey Morgan’s site Stacey’s InstagramStacey’s Book: The Astronaut’s WifeMomCo - Military MeetupsHow to start an online MomCo groupPardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Join the Christian Parenting Legacy Builders communityOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If she wasn’t one of my best friends, I don’t know if I would believe this story. However, it is true and real and incredibly powerful. My friend, Kylie White, was fully healed from near blindness. Her story and her miracle has exploded my faith the last several years. It has given me courage to pray bigger prayers. I will never be over what God did for Kylie. Even though I’ve heard this story many times, I heard even more details during this conversation which exploded my faith yet again. God is so good. I’m truly excited for us all to have this reminder today through Kylie’s story.My favorite part is hearing how she got to the miracle day. Listen closely as she shares the years leading up to her miracle. Lean into what God was pressing on her heart. And let’s lean into what God wants to say to you through her story. What is He asking you to release and surrender? What miracle do you believe is too far gone? In this episode, we chat about:Kylie’s miracle story and healing How we can trust God and lean in when we don’t understand the full storyHow to parent the pain endured with adoptionHow to love our kids unconditionally Don’t forget to share the Summer of Stories with your friends - so that they can also be reminded that: God is good. You are not alone. And He is with you during life’s hardest moments.Chapters00:00Introduction and Catching Up03:35Adoption and Navigating Challenges06:45Parenting and Unconditional Love09:40Experiencing a Modern-Day Miracle28:13Asking for Healing30:14Miraculous Healing35:23Confirmation of Healing39:26Orphan Prevention and Untold42:19Lessons Learned as a ParentConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoPardon the Mess is part of The Christian Parenting Podcast Network. As a donor funded ministry, we rely on generous supporters like you to keep this show going. If you enjoy this podcast, please consider giving a gift today. Become a Christian Parenting Legacy BuilderResources from today’s show:Kylie’s InstagramKylie’s blogUntold - Nonprofit Kylie supportsFather’s House - Bible study by RachelOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to Week 3 of our Summer of Stories series! For the next 10 weeks, you will hear one powerful story after another. We are featuring 10 stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments.I need everyone to take a massive deep breath before listening. And listen to the entire episode, not just the first few minutes. This is not a political episode. This is a story of one incredible mom, Amy Ford, that chose to keep her baby boy after an unplanned pregnancy and the God-sized story that followed. My favorite part is when she shares about her love for the women that walk with the shame of abortion. She is for all women and all stories. And she walks closely with women who have endured every part of the unplanned pregnancy journey. I am praying deeply that this story reaches an untold number of women and heals their hearts in a special way. And that we may join together and support women with unplanned pregnancies in the way God would. That we would love them deeply. Don't forget to share this episode with women in your community that need encouragement and healing around unplanned pregnancies.In this episode we chat about: Amy’s unplanned pregnancy Amy’s encouragement for those who live with shame of abortionHow to create a safe and supportive church environment with unplanned pregnanciesHow to turn towards God in some of life’s biggest mistakes or strugglesChapters00:00Introduction and Amy's Family03:34The Love Box and Volunteer Opportunities06:08The Rejection from a Pastor and the Healing Journey09:21The Impact of Amy's Story on Her Son14:35Creating a Safe and Supportive Church Environment19:28Healing and Hope After Abortion22:26Creating Safe Spaces in Churches for Unexpected Pregnancies26:34Taking Small Steps of Obedience29:15Celebrating Women Who Turn Towards GodConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoBecome a Christian Parenting donorResources from today’s show:Amy FordEmbrace GraceA Bump In LifeLove BoxSupport After AbortionOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

For our Summer of Stories, I got the pleasure of interviewing a dear friend Rachel Faulkner Brown about her incredibly hard and beautiful life. In the first half of this episode, we talk about her journey with losing two husbands and walking that grief journey twice. She shares so much wisdom for other widows as well as practical tips for all of us enduring life’s toughest pain.In the second half of our chat, Rachel bravely shares about their family’s most recent struggle - an eating disorder that quickly took a grip on her daughter. She provides invaluable insight and practical advice from the deeply painful journey they have walked.My favorite part of the interview is when she shares honestly about the shame we can feel as mothers. As she watched her daughter walk through the hardest season of her life - she was also faced with a choice to hold onto that control or release her to God. We all have these moments in parenting and we can learn so much from Rachel’s incredible faith journey.I’m so thrilled for you to get to know Rachel. She is a dear friend and a woman that has experienced God’s goodness throughout some of the deepest pain in her life. You will be inspired by her calling to pass on the love of God and hope to others’ in their darkest days.In this episode, we chat about:How to practically move forward when you lose your spouseHow to wrestle with God when horribly hard things happenHow to lean into God when life is upside downHow to love our kids when it’s hard and you must release controlHow to parent a child with an eating disorderChapters00:00Introduction and Background10:46The Importance of Honesty and Community30:28The Need for Aggressive Treatment39:07The Healing Journey and Future Hope48:17Prayer and Encouragement for MothersConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Never Alone Widows Father's House Bible StudyThere is More podcast Podcast with Rachel’s daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1Podcast with Rachel’s daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1Reverend Joanne MoodySt. Teresa of Avila QuoteHealing prayer - resource 1Healing prayer - resource 2Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Welcome to week 1 of our Summer of Stories series! For the next 10 weeks, you will hear one powerful story after another. We are featuring 10 stories of incredible moms that have endured significant challenges. Through these stories, we pray you will remember that God is faithful and always with you through life’s most challenging moments.Today’s guest is my dear friend, Joy Phenix, who bravely shares her journey of losing her amazing son. Her story of loss and indescribable grief is so very hard to hear but oddly peaceful and sacred. My favorite part is when she encourages us to be a student of others’ grief journey. Every single person grieves at different times and in different ways. We cannot judge our friends or family members on that journey. This takes patience and grace and understanding. This episode is for anyone walking in grief - not just the loss of a child. All of us have seasons of tragedy and unthinkable hard times. We want to know how to trust God again and how to move forward in the midst of the pain. Joy will touch your heart in a profound way. I am deeply thankful for her willingness to share her story to help others. In this episode we chat about: How to endure the indescribable journey of losing a childHow we can help and support friends in their grief How to remember each person grieves differently and at unique timesHow to normalize talking about grief through the process 00:00Introduction and Catching Up09:16The Power of Community in Times of Loss15:30Finding Hope and Healing Through Faith28:25Cherishing Memories and Finding Healing34:38Vulnerability and Trust in Difficult TimesEnjoy!Connect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Josh’s Celebration ServiceJoy’s InstagramBody Keeps The ScoreOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Comedian Michael Jr went from living in his car to one of the most influential and talented comedians in the country. In fact, he used to open the show for Jerry Seinfeld and went on to headline his own shows. He is now sharing the stage with his wife, Ebony, as they focus on strengthening marriages across the country.This engaging couple shares many great pieces of wisdom and insight during our episode, but I really enjoyed how they speak about conflict. It’s so easy to avoid conflict at all costs. They encourage us to utilize conflict for the greatness of marriage My favorite part (or least favorite) was when Michael Jr. asked me to share honestly about a recent disagreement I had with Ron. He went through the list of the fruit of the Spirit to see how I was handling a specific situation. And I bombed his test. It was embarrassing, but really challenged me on how I handle conflict. I love their hearts for marriage. They have a passion to remind couples that marriage is GOOD and it does work.In this episode, we discuss:How easy it is to drift in marriage when kids are in the homeHow to keep your marriage a priority and intentionally connectHow to utilize conflict instead of avoiding itChapters00:00Introduction and Family Background04:04Letting Go and Trusting God with Our Children08:54Faith as a Consistent and Visible Part of Family Life23:53Merging Talents to Help Couples Find Joy in Marriage29:19Revealing Areas of Freedom Through ConflictConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Funny How Marriage WorksAssessment for your conflict resolution Emotions WheelFunny How Marriage Works TourOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy almost Summer!! I am delighted to share the story of Sarah Harmeyer and her love for gathering neighbors. You will be so fascinated by her story of creating a table and setting out to have people over. Over time, she hosted thousands of people just one night at a time. She absolutely inspired me to get back out there and invite folks to my home. You will be inspired and motivated and so very touched how God used Sarah’s life to start a movement called “Neighbor’s Table.” He took a nudge in her heart and kept expanding it across the country.My favorite part was at the end when we talked about her current living situation with her aging father. She is so tender and so gracious with his walk with Alzheimers. I pray that I handle my own parents with such care and compassion one day.In this episode we chat about: How a simple dinner party created a movementWhy your neighbors need community What an invitation can do for an individualHow we can preach less and simply love moreHow to care for aging parents with compassionChapters00:00Introduction and Catching Up10:01Stories of Love and Connection Around the Table22:59Building Relationships with New Neighbors and Introducing Sarah's Dad27:02Caring for Aging Parents with Love and Compassion30:53Closing Remarks and Action ItemsConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoResources from today’s show:Sarah’s InstagramNeighbor’s TableInvite Sarah to SpeakTable Talk Questions - source Close To My HeartKindness Diaries with LeonLeon LogothetisGod’s Holy Spirit in Me kid’s devotionalOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” —Matthew 28:19–20 We’ve spent this school year praying for our kids to be marked by the things of God. We’ve prayed that they live with integrity, confidence, generosity, endurance, and much more. But these are nothing more than admirable qualities if they aren’t used for God’s kingdom purposes. Before Jesus ascended to heaven, he gave us our mission. He told us to go and make disciples, sharing the story of his grace and love. The Great Commission is our central mission. The same is true for our kids. We’re God’s Plan A for spreading the gospel. There’s no backup plan, there’s no contingency, and there’s nobody else to tag in for our spot. But it all starts at home. It happens in the seemingly insignificant moments of reading Bible stories to our toddlers and the really hard places of pointing them to Jesus on the heels of their biggest mistakes and greatest obstacles. Please let us never underestimate the significance of our jobs as moms and dads, discipling our kids to share the gospel to the next generation. Let’s wrap up this school year by praying that our kids will be marked by the mission of Jesus, doing it with truth, discipline, purity, and every other characteristic of God we’ve prayed over them this year. Lord, thank you for the gift of my children and the privilege of praying over them this school year. Please mark their lives with a determination to fulfill the mission you created for them before they were ever born. Give [name] the wisdom to pursue you every day and a spirit of urgency in following your plans for their life. God’s word speaks: 1 Peter 2:9; Mark 16:15; 1 Peter 3:15; Ecclesiastes 12:13–14Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy