Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

Erin Weidemann joins Pardon the Mess as many of us find ourselves (unexpectedly and suddenly) in the throes of homeschooling. A professional educator and now a homeschooling mama, Erin offers extremely practical ways to maximize our homeschooling operations. You will love her “Top Six Tips for Setting up a Temporary Homeschool.” They are both grace-filled and doable for those of us who feel like fish out of water when it comes to homeschooling our kids. More than anything, I promise you will walk away feeling encouraged and capable.  During these times, Erin reminds us that our real goal is to form bonds with our kids and lead them to Jesus every day—the rest is icing on the cake.    Amen, sister!Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Grammy-nominated singer and songwriter Jeremy Camp experienced both love and gut-wrenching loss in his twenties after falling in love with Melissa Henning and then losing her to cancer shortly after their honeymoon.  I Still Believe is the newly-released film portraying their story of God’s faithfulness in meeting the deepest of needs, even in the midst of unimaginable loss.  Today, Jeremy is married to his wife of seventeen years, Adrienne. They have three children and are passionate about keeping Jesus in the middle of their life and marriage and sharing God’s love around the world any way they can.  Jeremy and Adrienne talk to us about the movie I Still Believe, as well as their new marriage book, In Unison. We chat about finding God’s blessings even in a pandemic and practical ways to navigate conflict in our marriages. The Camps will encourage you with their deep faith and unrelenting message of the hope that is only found in Jesus.Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I was reading through the book of Daniel this week, and I came across the part most of us learned about in first-grade Vacation Bible School: the part where King Nebuchadnezzar built a golden statue and told everyone they had to bow to it. When Daniel and his buddies refused to comply, the king promptly decided the next best step would be to turn up the temperature on the ol’ furnace and throw them in it. Daniel, committed to living the truths of his faith in God, said these profound words as he faced the possibility of going down in flames: “If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up” (Daniel 3:16–17). And God did deliver them, not allowing even one little scorch to their bodies. I was thinking about what a Daniel kind of faith looks like for us at present, as we’re experiencing the angst of this potentially life-threatening pandemic.  Are we sharing Daniel’s sentiment with those around us?  Are we sharing that our God is able to deliver us?  Even if he does not, we will not fall to the temptation of fear, faithlessness, and despair? In his commentary of this passage, Warren Wiersbe says, “The devil tempts us to destroy our faith, but God tests us to develop our faith, because a faith that can’t be tested can’t be trusted.” As we face these days of uncertainty, many will find their faith tested. But even in the midst of the testing, we have hope knowing that, in the refining process, we will come out with a faith that’s even more trusted. On today’s podcast, five-time cancer survivor and founder of Truth Becomes Her Erin Weidemann talks about the importance of praying for both the physical and spiritual health of our kids. Erin’s testimony reminds me a lot of David’s. After beating cancer five times, she has complete confidence that her God is able to heal her over and over again.  But even if he chooses not to in the future, she will choose to live each day at peace without worry or despair. Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Do you feel like you’ve got more questions than answers these days? Me too! Which is why I’m thrilled that we have Sissy Goff and David Thomas on our podcast to walk us through ways we can support our kids emotionally during these tough days. Sissy and David are on staff at Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville, Tennessee, and have extensive experience counseling kids. They speak all over the country encouraging parents to raise their kids with intentionality, focusing on the most common struggles parents face in today’s fast-paced society. One of the standout moments in our discussion was their advice that the best way we can help our kids work through their anxiety in these uncertain days is to manage our own. And then they give us some much-needed advice on how to practically do just that. We also discuss the differences between fear, worry, and anxiety, and they help us recognize when our kids may be struggling and need extra support. Spoiler alert: there’s a lot of talk about being hopeful and patient parents—and I may or may not have felt like that was semi-directed at me. Ha!   Although this interview was scheduled months ago, the Lord clearly knew we would need a word from David and Sissy at exactly this time.  So let me encourage you to take a few minutes today to hear from two people who love the Lord and our kids. Be encouraged as they practically walk us through ways to best parent our kids in these days of uncertainty. P.S. Want to hear and learn more from Sissy and David? Check out their podcast here and some of their book resources available now!Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you found your family doing some unusual things as you’ve had extra time these last few weeks?  Us too. For example, my family was sitting around yesterday searching pandemic playlists and laughing at the songs that have a completely new meaning in these days of social isolation. Here are a few we came across: “Can’t Touch This” – MC Hammer “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” — Elvis Presley “All by Myself” – Eric Carmen “Right Here Waiting” – Richard Marx “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” – The Police “I Will Survive” – Gloria Gaynor Stay with me, I’m coming back to songs in a second. We’re praying peace for our families this week on Pardon the Mess.  I love that when I wrote this prayer guide for our families over a year ago, the Lord knew this week we would need an extra dose of peace. (It’s as if God already knew what we would need before it even happened. Ha!) I think a keyword for us in the coming days is truth.  We need to be focusing on the truth of God’s word over the chaos in the world. We need to spend more time in Scripture and less time in the news and on our social media feeds. We need to be consumed with God’s promises instead of the world’s words of hopelessness. What are we doing today to write a lasting song of God’s faithfulness?  What song will our family hear us sing as we walk difficult days?  Are we writing a song that could lead future generations to worship our Savior?  One day, we will have the opportunity to look back on this pandemic and consider how we fared in a time when many found it difficult to understand God’s plan and questioned his goodness.  For now, ask Jesus to write a song of peace and faithfulness in your life these next days and weeks. Pray for a song that will speak truth and peace to our culture that needs Jesus, leaving a legacy of faith from your life. What’s your song today?Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The Israelites were trapped with seemingly no way out. The Egyptian army was fast approaching from behind. In front, they faced the unpassable waters of the Red Sea.  In frustration, they cried out to God, asking why he would allow this desperate situation and questioning if he really cared about them.  And then Moses answered with twelve words of truth: “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still” (Exodus 14:14). These twelve words are as relevant for us in the middle of a pandemic as they were centuries ago to a flailing nation with its back against the wall.   Singer, songwriter, and author Ellie Holcomb joins me today to talk about suffering and what this passage has meant to her in the seasons of struggle. We talk about knowing God better in the middle of hard times and how God’s word is our defense when we feel trapped and helpless.  My favorite part of our talk with Ellie is her reminder that suffering never has the final word in our life because Jesus is coming back. He alone has and is the final word.  Ellie is a sweet, sweet spirit who will encourage you as she shares vulnerably about balancing faith, family, and the work God has called her to accomplish. She also has a great word for parenting with intentionality, even when our days can seem very mundane and ordinary. And, let’s be honest, there are lots of mundane moments these days as we spend hours upon hours with our kids in a time of social distancing.  My prayer is that you will be encouraged today, in the midst of struggling, knowing that God is for us. We need only to be still.Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“You don’t have to worry about whether your world is under control. God rules. You just have to learn to trust him when his rule isn’t evident.” —Paul David Tripp This week, as we’re praying our kids through the school year, we’re focused on praying about service for our families (especially in days like we’re facing now). Paul Tripp’s devotional, New Morning Mercies, is relevant to what we’re facing today as it speaks to living in a world that seems out of control: Honestly facing your lack of sovereignty over your own life produces either anxiety or relief. Anxiety is God-forgetting. It is the result of thinking that life is on your shoulders, that it is your job to figure it all out and keep things in order. But there is a much better way. It is God-remembering. It rests in the relief that although it may not look like it, your life is under the careful control of the One who defines wisdom, power, and love. In all of the moments when life is out of your control, it is not out of his control. As we walk through days of uncertainty with the coronavirus and the fear surrounding it, let’s focus on serving others by sharing the message of Jesus’ sovereignty. Let’s teach our children that, even in the hardest of days, we are called to love our neighbor and serve them in our words, actions, and finances, and by praying for them. Serving others is an opportunity that is most present when people are suffering. We are here for a time such as this, and the Lord can use us mightily when we are willing to trust his heart and follow his plans. On today’s podcast, we talk about serving in the midst of a pandemic and how to best speak truth into our kids in a way that marks them for years to come. This is the closest thing to 9/11 that our kids have faced, so the opportunity is great. If you haven’t had a chance to read my blog on “Parenting During a Pandemic,” check it out here. These are times of uncertainty for all of us—but not for our Father. I’m grateful to be on this journey with you as we trust God in our lack of control, knowing “it is not out of his control.”Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“It’s never too late to start today.” That’s the challenge Latasha Morrison leaves us with on today’s podcast as we talk about diversity and racial reconciliation. I can promise you that listening to this forty-minute podcast will be one of the best uses of your time today. It’s that good! Latasha Morrison is the founder of Be the Bridge, a nonprofit organization equipping folks just like us to serve as ambassadors of racial reconciliation. She speaks very practically and grace-filled about the need to listen, learn, lament, and leverage as we consider our part in this pervasive issue. We talk about the call to being unified in Christ and that if one part of the body of Christ is struggling, we all have a responsibility to do our part to implement change. There’s so much to consider in today’s podcast, but I especially love the practical ways she suggests we teach our kids the truths about diversity beginning at an early age, starting with the books we read, the movies we see, and the restaurants where we eat.  The Lord has given a word to Latasha that we all need to hear, and I’m so thrilled to have her join us. Let’s keep the discussions on intentionality going this month as we tackle the uncomfortable but critical topics facing our families. Interested in books Latasha recommends in today's episode? Check them out below: Divided by Faith The Color of Compromise White Awake Just MercyOur Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How are your New Year’s resolutions coming? It’s been a few months since we kicked off 2020 and, undoubtedly, many of us have decided those naïve resolutions of January were simply a pipe dream. The crowds at the gym have died down while the lines at the In-N-Out Burger have maxed out. I have the “My Fitness Pal” app on my phone. Every single morning, it pops up a notification around 10:00 a.m. asking if I’ve forgotten to log my breakfast.  You’re precious, little app, but I haven’t logged my breakfast (or lunch or dinner) in about six weeks. But I do want to thank you for being so ambitious on my behalf and always thinking the best of me by assuming it’s just an oversight. This week, we’re praying that our kids have the resolve to turn away from the temptations they face and a willingness to turn to Jesus when they need a way out. Our kids’ generation is inundated with social media, pornography, graphic music, widespread internet access, and so much more. Their resolve will need to be mighty to withstand the temptation they will face in their lives. Kay Wyma joins us today with a needed reminder that worth is at the center of the ability to show resolve.  Our kids need to be reminded that they have immense worth in Christ and that looking away, or saying no, or living differently comes from knowing you who you are to Jesus. In short, we’re praying, through Jesus, that our kids will have the strength and conviction to live set apart or holy in a world that is growing further and further away from Christ.Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We’re kicking off a new series this March focused on intentionality. I can’t think of a better way to get started than with Jennie Allen encouraging us to be intentional in identifying the toxic thoughts in our lives.  Jennie says “the greatest spiritual battle of our generation is being fought between our ears.” And with an average of 30,000 thoughts a day going through our minds, it’s easy to see how quickly those negative thoughts can have a huge impact on our lives.   On today’s program, Jennie Allen, Kay Wyma, and I jump in the car for a carpool podcast of sorts.  We talk about:  identifying our negative thought patterns, acknowledging that we are in charge of our thoughts; they are not in charge of us, the science behind our thoughts, and remembering that God gives us the power to confront and overcome the toxic ones. It’s a fun interview you won’t want to miss. We even drove through McDonald’s for fries during our chat. We’re so fortunate to have Jennie Allen on Pardon the Mess. She’s a gifted communicator and the founder and visionary behind the IF:Gathering, an organization that equips women to know God more deeply and disciple others. She’s a speaker, author, podcaster, and much more. Listen to today’s podcast on your favorite podcast platform, or watch the video here!Our Sponsors:* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy