Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

Does your partner feel more like a roommate than a lover lately? You’re definitely not alone—and you’re not wrong for wanting more. In this Language of Love Session, I help Shauna, who’s been with her partner for three years. She misses the early days—the surprise love notes, spontaneous date nights, the simple act of hand-holding. Now? It feels like they’re stuck in a routine, more like roommates navigating a to-do list than lovers sharing a life. She’s tried dropping hints, even having honest conversations, but nothing seems to shift. Her question: How do I ask for more romance without making him feel like he’s failing? Together, we dig into why passion so often fades in long-term relationships—and how to revive that spark with intention, not pressure. You’ll learn: Why the “infatuation phase” ends—and what comes next in a healthy love story The sex-romance stalemate: what it is and how it silently sabotages connection How to give your partner a roadmap to romance (without it feeling like a chore) Why men and women often feel loved in very different ways—and how to bridge the gap How emotional and physical intimacy feed each other in a lasting relationship What role sexual availability plays in inspiring affection—and how to talk about it The subtle ways your own behavior might be discouraging romance (and how to shift it) When to seek couples therapy—and why it’s not just for marriages in crisis Plus, I share a simple, powerful communication strategy that invites your partner into deeper connection—without shame, blame, or ultimatums. If you feel stuck in a routine that no longer feels like love, this episode is your invitation to begin again. Have a question about your own love life? Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com to be featured in a future episode—or even join me live on the show. Looking for tools to deepen your connection and reignite your passion? Head over to my website for expert-backed resources designed to help you heal, grow, and thrive in your relationships. Explore my 7 Days to Better Sex program and take my free quiz to discover what you truly want in love. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You just had sex… and now you feel worse." The bodies were close, the chemistry was there, maybe even fireworks. But now you're lying there, staring at the ceiling, wondering why do I feel so damn empty? Maybe there was  no emotional spark, just physical contact—and now you're caught in the afterglow of regret. You’re not broken. You’re not alone. And no, you’re not crazy for wanting more than just skin-on-skin. In this episode of Language of Love Bite, we’re talking about lonely sex—why it happens, how to spot it, and how one honest sentence can shift everything. It’s raw. It’s real. And it might just save your next connection from becoming another ghost in your bed. We're going deep on: Why sex doesn’t automatically equal intimacy – How physical closeness can still leave you feeling disconnected    The “maintenance sex” trap – When sex becomes transactional (and why quickies aren’t the problem)   Why emotional foreplay matters – Especially for those with responsive desire or “feminine” energy    How past trauma or dissociation can creep into the bedroom – Leaving you feeling alone even when you’re not    The one sentence that can transform your connection – A simple invitation to bring hearts (not just bodies) closer   Feeling disconnected even in a sexually active relationship? You’re not the only one.  Share your story: Email languageoflovepod@gmail.com—your experience could help someone else feel less alone. Craving a deeper connection? Grab my book Sex Magic for tools on sacred intimacy. Because you deserve sex that makes you feel whole—not hollow. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when the worst thing you can imagine… actually happens? When Larry Carlat’s son, Rob, died by suicide, it shattered his world. Yet from that profound heartbreak emerged something unexpected: deep connection, renewed purpose, and a love more powerful than he ever imagined possible. In this raw and deeply moving Language of Love Conversation, I sit down with Larry Carlat—writer, father, and an unexpected guide through grief. His book, A Space in the Heart: A Survival Guide for Grieving Parents, weaves memoir with grounded wisdom, offering solace not just for bereaved parents, but for anyone navigating the loss of a loved one. But Larry isn't your typical grief expert. He didn't seek out groups. Spirituality wasn't his starting point. He wasn't even sure he believed in an afterlife—until grief cracked him wide open, leading to an extraordinary journey. Together, we explore: Losing his son Rob—and the love that outlived him How Larry went from a “lone wolf” to grief coach, group leader, and friend to fellow grievers The healing magic of community, even for guys who never thought they’d talk about their feelings Psychedelic journeys and psychic mediums—how Larry reconnected with Rob on the other side Why grief is one of the most potent paths to spiritual awakening What men need (but rarely ask for) when they’re in pain—and how Larry is creating safe spaces for them to cry, connect, and heal The truth about guilt, shame, and the choice to live again—even after unimaginable loss Larry’s story is a vital reminder: we don’t have to "move on" to move forward. Joy and sorrow can coexist. If you’re grieving or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers a beacon of hope and understanding. If this episode speaks to your heart, there’s more support waiting for you. A Space in the Heart: A Survival Guide for Grieving Parents is a powerful read for anyone navigating the impossible. For men navigating grief, check out Larry’s work at griefforguys.com or reach him at lcarlat@gmail.com. Curious about connecting beyond loss? The Grief Healing Collective offers live sessions, resources, and community. Start with my Good Grief Course for practical tools. If you’ve felt your loved one close or want to, this episode is for you. Share your story: languageoflovepod@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you looking for more ways to spice things up in the bedroom? We’ve all heard the usual—lingerie, toys, candlelit date nights, maybe even a threesome. But have you ever wondered if the real magic has been there all along, just waiting for you to try? What if feeling more, instead of doing more, is what really lights the fire? Curious to find out?  In this special Language of Love Bite, I dive into something that’s not just my newest obsession—it’s the subject of my brand-new book: Sex Magic. The truth is, the pandemic—and everything that came after it—opened my eyes. I started seeing more and more people, whether in monogamous or non-monogamous relationships, desperately looking for ways to spice things up. And while the desire was valid, the strategies? Often risky. I heard from couples exploring threesomes, opening their relationships, chasing novelty in ways that were threatening the very foundations of their connection. But what if I told you that there are powerful, beautiful, time-tested ways to bring that spark back—and they’ve been around for thousands of years? That’s where Sex Magic comes in. In this episode, I share: Why traditional advice on “spicing it up” only goes so far What the ancient traditions of Tantra, Taoism, and Kundalini can teach us about modern intimacy How to move sexual energy through your whole body—and even beyond A ritual you can use to manifest your desires during orgasm (yes, really) How sex magic can create emotional intimacy, spiritual connection, and even…miracles Whether you're solo or partnered, curious or all-in, this episode is your invitation to explore a whole new dimension of pleasure, connection, and personal power. Want to take it further? When you grab your copy of Sex Magic, you’ll also receive bonus tools: My Quantum Sex web course A beautiful Sex Magic Ritual Journal A live initiation replay to help you get started Visit drlauraberman.com/sexmagic to learn more.  And if you try these practices or manifest something juicy, I want to hear from you! Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com—your story might inspire someone else to claim their magic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever looked across the room at your partner and thought, “When did we become roommates instead of lovers?” Maybe you’re still affectionate, still loving—but the sexual connection? Practically nonexistent. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. In fact, nearly 1 in 5 marriages are considered “sexless,” but that doesn’t mean your spark is gone for good. In this Language of Love Bite, we’re diving deep into the real reasons couples stop being intimate—and exactly how to rebuild your sex life step-by-step, even if it’s been months (or years). By the end of this episode, you’ll know exactly what to say to your partner—and how to start feeling sexy together again. In this episode, we’re breaking down: The top 3 culprits behind sexless relationships (it’s not just stress!) Why emotional safety is the real aphrodisiac The exact words to use when you want to bring up the lack of sex—without it getting awkward The sensual (not sexual) ritual that jumpstarts physical intimacy without pressure A proven sex therapy technique called sensate focus that helps you reawaken desire The gentle roadmap from no sex… to next-level pleasure If conversations feel too loaded, find a certified sex therapist via AASECT. Don’t miss out on 7 Days to Better Sex —a game-changing guide designed to bring more passion and connection into your relationship. Plus, take my  Free  quiz to discover new ways to strengthen your bond and take your relationship to the next level. And be sure to check out my newest  book, Sex Magic, to take your sex life to an entirely new level.  You can also check my video  on Rebuilding Connection in Relationships Have a love language success story or a challenge you’re facing? I’d love to hear from you! Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com —your story might just inspire others in a future episode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever feel emotions that don’t seem to belong to you? Like you're carrying pain that started long before you were born? What if the things you’re struggling with—sexual trauma, shame, fear of being seen—aren’t just yours... but inherited? In this  Language of Love Conversation, I sit down with Dr. Frank Anderson, a renowned trauma psychiatrist who’s helped countless people heal—but had to take his own journey first. Frank’s new book, To Be Loved: A Story of Truth, Trauma and Transformation, blends memoir with a trauma healing guide. But before he could write it, he had to live it. He grew up disconnected from his body, afraid to show who he really was, and deeply shaped by generations of silence and suppression. In this episode, we go deep into: How trauma hides in families for generations—and how to spot it in your own Why intellect and “having it all together” often hide emotional chaos How hiding his identity became a form of survival—and how he found the courage to be fully seen What it really means to feel inherited pain, not just analyze it Coming out, breaking patterns, and embracing truth—on every level The life-changing magic of combining IFS with somatic healing And how you can start breaking cycles, too This is more than a conversation. It’s an invitation—to feel, to face what’s been buried, and maybe, to be the one in your family who finally sets it all down. Learn more about Dr. Frank Anderson’s work, including his new book To Be Loved: A Story of Truth, Trauma and Transformation, on his website and socials and register for his events. Also make sure to check out the Grief Healing Collective for a community of like minded people, amazing resources on grief healing, and live healing sessions and events.  You can also check out my Good Grief Course. Have your own story about breaking the cycle? I’d love to hear it—email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So… your partner watches porn. Does that mean they’re cheating? Or is it just harmless fantasy? If you’ve ever asked yourself this—or felt a pit in your stomach after finding out—this episode is for you. In this Language of Love session, I answer a powerful question from a listener named Karen. She just found out her boyfriend watches porn regularly, and she’s not sure how to feel. Hurt? Angry? Insecure? Betrayed? Here’s the thing—this isn’t just about porn. It’s about trust. Boundaries. Feeling seen and safe in your relationship. And we’re going there. In this episode, we get into: Why watching porn doesn’t automatically mean someone is cheating When fantasy crosses the line into a problem What porn does to the brain—and why so many people got hooked during the pandemic How too much porn can mess with intimacy (like, seriously mess with it) Why it’s totally normal to feel triggered or rejected—and how to talk about it with your partner The difference between emotional safety and sexual shame—and how to move through both Real tips for navigating conversations around porn, self-pleasure, and trust Remember to visit my website to take a free quiz and explore 7 Days to Better Sex. It’s not about right or wrong—it’s about discovering what’s true for you. I’m here to help you gain clarity on what you want, what feels right, and how to bring more honesty and connection into your relationships. And if you’ve ever felt alone in your struggles, know this: you’re not. So many of us are navigating the same questions. Got something on your mind? A story or question you'd like to share? I’d love to hear from you. Email me anytime at languageoflovepod@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

They say love is enough—but is it really? What if one simple question could reveal whether your relationship is built for long-term growth… or destined to quietly fall apart? In this Language of Love Bite, we explore the subtle but powerful force that separates short-lived connection from lasting partnership: mutual inspiration. This isn’t about how often you laugh together or whether you share a Spotify playlist. It’s about whether you feel proud of who you’re becoming with this person—and if your future selves are being shaped by love, not stifled by it. You’ll also learn a 2-minute reflection exercise (called “The Mirror Test”) that just might change the way you look at your relationship forever. Let’s dive in! What You’ll Learn: The one question that can predict whether your relationship is built to last Why growth—not just chemistry—is the real glue in long-term love Key signs your partner supports your evolution (and red flags they might not) How admiration and inspiration fuel deeper connection Simple ways to check in on growth—monthly rituals, vision sharing, and more How to use journaling to reinforce love, even in small everyday moments “The Mirror Test”: A quick exercise to assess who you’ve become in this relationship—and who you’re becoming Because true love doesn’t just feel good. It helps you grow. Want to see how your relationship is really doing? Start with my free quiz and explore 7 Days to Better Sex, a gentle path toward more connection, honesty, and intimacy. Got a question or a story to share? I’d love to hear from you at languageoflovepod@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does it mean to wait for love—not out of fear, but from deep, spiritual conviction? In this extraordinary Language of Love Conversation, we meet Sohale—a man who, at 32, has never been physically intimate with another person. Not because he’s afraid of love, but because he reveres it. For Sohale, sex isn't casual—it's sacred. A union of energy, soul, and spirit. And he’s been saving himself for that. But the story doesn’t begin (or end) there. It started in childhood—with a mystical calling, a boundary-crossing pediatrician, and a little boy who learned to transform trauma into prayer. And it continues today—as Sohale navigates the modern dating world with ancient longing, tantric wisdom, and unwavering faith that the right soul will meet him where he stands. Here’s What We Cover: How a sexually abusive pediatric exam shaped Sohale’s sensuality—and his lifelong relationship with spirit How Sohale discovered fusing  sexual energy with prayer from a young age How gratitude (and a simple email trick) became the emotional lifeline in his darkest hours The unexpected power of tantric self-practice—and how it helped him heal What it means to look for a partner not just with a body, but with a soul attuned to divinity Try Sohale’s Soul app—where spontaneous gratitude meets spiritual practice. Whether you're drawn to Sufism, Tantra, Kabbalah, or Kriya Yoga, there’s a 30-day soul path waiting for you. Use code: 30DaysOnMe at https://www.bringsoul.life/ Got thoughts? Stories? Or a tantric soulmate for Sohale? Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com And if this moved you—share it. Healing becomes sacred when we do it together. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Love after trauma isn’t just about passion—it’s about patience. The quiet moments between kisses, the hesitation in a held hand, the unspoken fear that lingers in intimacy… These are the places where love is tested—and where it can be rebuilt. In this Language of Love Session, we return to Brian and Stacey’s raw, unfolding story. If you’ve been with us, you know: this isn’t just about sex. It’s about two hearts trying to find safety in each other—while wrestling with the ghosts of their pasts. (If you’re new here, make sure to listen to my past sessions with Brian and Stacy to learn about the heartache, the fights, the small victories that brought them here.) So what happens when healing almost feels within reach? When the arguments soften, the warmth returns… and then—out of nowhere—the old pain rushes back in? Here’s What You’ll Take Away: “I want to, but I can’t”—why this conflict is more common than we admit (and how to move through it) How childhood wounds whisper in adult intimacy—and how to quiet them When even loving touch feels like pressure—and how to rewrite that story Why watching porn together became a bridge, not a wall The moment a simple kiss became the bravest act of all How couples accidentally retraumatize each other—and how to stop The shift that helped Stacey reclaim her body—and her voice Why Brian is learning that patience isn’t passive—it’s love in action Want to feel safe in your own skin—and in your partner’s arms? Start with my free quiz and then delve into 7 Days to Better Sex. If you're navigating deeper wounds, explore EMDR therapy or dive into the Drama Triangle—because real love shouldn’t reopen old scars. Your story isn’t over. In fact, the most healing chapters may be just ahead. Questions or thoughts? I’d love to hear from you: languageoflovepod@gmail.com And if this episode moved you, share it. Healing is contagious when we do it together. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices