Lost Spaces: Memories from Gay Bars, Lesbian Clubs, and LGBTQ+ Parties

If you've ever wondered what 90s New York City was like, then today's episode is the one for you. Before mass gentrification, before eye-watering rent hikes, and before all the personality was stamped out of it, queer night clubbing in the Big Apple was anarchic, unhinged, and magical. And the person that told me this is this week's guest, Sherry Vine - drag superstar, singer-songwriter, and host of The Sherry Vine Variety Show (available to stream now on OutTV and FrootTV), who was right there smack dab in the middle of it all. We talk about moving to NYC, getting started in drag, and Sherry gives a flavour of that anarchic magic that used to be on every street corner... Do you have any memories of sleazy, sleazy NYC, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Sherry by watching her tv show The Sherry Vine Variety Show on OutTV in North America or FrootTV in the UK. You can also find her via her website (https://www.sherryvine.com/), or following her on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/misssherryvine/) or YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/user/misssherryvine).

So, we talk a lot on this show about new, fresh, exciting love (or, let's be honest, lust!), and how magnificent and all-consuming that can be. But, we don't often talk about that wonderful long-term love - you know the kind where you can be cranky and know the other person won't get offended. Or when you know each other so well that you can finish off each other's sentences? Ahhh.... Anyway, all of that is to say that this week I'm joined by Charles and Martha from the Full Circle Podcast, who joined me to talk about The Venture Inn in Philadelphia. We jump straight in to their meeting story, and then weave a path from there to their experiences of enjoying the scene together, and how the pandemic had a significant (but wonderful) impact on them. Do you have any memories of The Venture Inn, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Charles and Martha by listening to their podcast Full Circle, or following them on socials - they're on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/fullcirclethepod/), Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/FullCircleThePod) and Threads (https://www.threads.net/@fullcirclethepod).

Have you ever fallen in love with your best friend? Because - spoiler alert - it's a terrible, terrible idea. Or, at least it is for most people. Anyway, my guest this week, singer-songwriter Benjamin Koll happened to do just that, falling in love with his childhood friend, no less. And so by the time he managed to overcome that, and realise that he needed to move on, he was chomping at the bit to explore the queer scene. And it sounds to me from our conversation that he landed in just the right place - a welcoming bar in Valencia, Spain, which was called Central. We caught up to talk about Central and why it was so important to him. Along the way, we also talked about the growing visibility of the bear community, and what it's like to follow your passion. Do you have any memories of Central, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Benjamin by visiting his website (https://www.benjaminkoll.com/), or following him on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/benjaminkollofficial/), or Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/benjaminkollmusic) or YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/c/BenjaminKoll).

So when I talk about the importance of queer spaces I'm usually thinking about the fact that they give people opportunities to find others and connect, as well as exploring their identity in a safe space. But there's this whole other layer that I don't think about much. And, that is the fact that, for performers these spaces are (on top of everything else) where they get to dream and craft and create and fuck up with a safe and understanding audience. And this week's conversation was a great reminder of this. For this chat I'm joined by the cabaret geek himself, Paulus, who took a break from his latest show Looking For Me Friend: The Music of Victoria Wood to talk me about London's Madame JoJos. It was here that he got his big break as a drag queen, and though drag is no longer his bread and butter the place remains important to him because of the magic within the walls. We talk about the thanklessness of drag, building a chosen family, and how sometimes all you need is a wonderful middle-aged woman to tell you what you should do next. Do you have any memories of Madame JoJos, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Paulus by visiting his website (https://thecabaretgeek.com/), or following him on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/thecabaretgeek/), or Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/thecabaretgeek/).

So, if you ask me reality TV, as awful and cringey and addictive and delicious as it is, has been monumental in increasing queer visibility in tv and film. Back in the late 90s/early 00s when reality tv was in its infancy, there were a lot of gay ‘characters’ (for want of a better term) that were cast on these shows as (I think) a bit of a shock tactic… And what TV executives maybe didn't anticipate was that audiences warmed to these people, and were rooting for them, and actively invested in their success. And, as a result, that made the aforementioned TV Execs a little less scared about including queer characters in other shows... Which brings us to today’s guest. Now, everything I've just said definitely applies to this man. He was the very first winner of the reality TV juggernaut ‘Survivor’ all the way back in the year 2000. He became an overnight star because of his antics on the island, which included his comfort with being naked. But, long before he found fame he was a bartender at Lost and Found, a gay bar that was found in Washington DC. We got together to talk all about the bar, and along the way we discuss body image, THAT tv show, and being on the hunt for ‘guile’. Do you have any memories of Lost and Found, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Richard by visiting his website (https://www.richhatch.com/), or following him across socials - Twitter (https://twitter.com/HatchRichard), Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/hatch_rich), Youtube (https://www.youtube.com/RichHatch) and Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/richardhatchofficialpage)

Sometimes I feel a bit dumb (or maybe just a bit sheepish) about some of the revelations I have through doing this show, especially since we're so close to 200 episodes (eek!) and I feel like I should know it all by now... But, then, on the other hand, the fact that I'm still learning so much is part of the reason that I'm so excited to share these stories with you. And this week the thing that resonated the most is the idea that when things are at their absolute worst also happens to be the time when being in a sweaty nightclub is actually the most fulfilling.... This week I was lucky enough to sit down with comedian and podcaster Sheria Mattis, and it helped me refocus on the importance of clubbing and nightlife and release. In those times of my life when things have felt so difficult and knotty and hard, being out and shocking my senses was the best way for me to recalibrate,. Oh, and before you listen to this episode - if you don't know who she is already you should probably google Rachel Maddow, because... well, we talk about her quite a lot and it's useful if you know what she looks like! Do you have any memories of Rock N Rollerskate, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Sheria by listening to her podcast, Semi-Woke - a show where Sheria brainwashes her co-host Pranav with one woke concept a week with the ultimate end goal of turning him gay. I mean, what's not to love? Or, why not follow her on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/sheriamattiscomedy) or on Twitter/X (https://twitter.com/sheriadidthat)

You know how they say that no matter who you fall in love with during the course of your life you'll always compare everyone to your first true love? Well, I think that's also true of nightclubs. Which I know sounds a little wacky, but I wholeheartedly believe that there's something really magical about your first place. This week I sat down with Digo and Caleb from the podcast Ants Humans Stars to find out about Digo's lost space, Mars Bar, which was in Richmond, Virginia. You can quickly see why he loved this place.- it was one of those dive bars that had an especially cheesy 80s night every week. And, it came at just the right time in his life - he'd just dropped out of college, fled to the nearest city, and was trying to fall in love (or, as he puts it, he was chasing D)... I loved this conversation because of the reminder of the importance and pull of the dancefloor. Do you have any memories of Mars Bar, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Caleb and Digo by listening to their podcast, Ants Humans Stars. You can also visit their website (https://www.antshumansstars.com/), or following them on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/antshumansstars/) or YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/@antshumansstarspodcast)

You know how sometimes these conversations are only very, very, very tenuously linked to a queer space, and in the intro I try and come up with some justification for why we didn't talk that much about it to prepare you for the episode ahead? Well, dear listener, this week I'm not even going to try to insult your intelligence by pretending that we talked about a queer space, cause we didn't. I failed you. BUT, that's not to say that it's not a great conversation! I was lucky enough to sit down with Jaimie Kelton, actor, voiceover artist, author and host of the Queer Family podcast. And in our conversation we talk all about what it's like to grow up in one of the gayest cities in the world, San Francisco, but still battle with coming to terms with your own sexuality, how to shed the idea of yourself being a 'good girl', and why the stereotype of the u-haul lesbian is so damn persistent... Do you have any memories of queer spaces that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Jaimie by listening to the Queer Family Podcast, visiting her website (⁠https://www.thequeerfamilypodcast.com/⁠), or following the show on Facebook ⁠https://www.facebook.com/ovariestalk/⁠), Instagram (⁠https://www.instagram.com/thequeerfamilypodcast/⁠) or TikTok (⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thequeerfamilypodcast⁠)

I am kind of intrigued by this phenomenon of queer men feeling more comfortable in a lesbian bar than in any other space. And, there's no one reason, obviously, but it seems like a lot of it comes down to the lack of pretence and lack of attitude that you can find in the good ol' fashioned lesbian bar. Which brings us to this week's conversation - we're heading back to the city I grew up in, Adelaide, to visit the lesbian bar Bean's Bar. My guest is Marcus Hamence, who is a bit of a man about town in Adelaide. He's an interior designer, events promoter and he writes a column for the local newspaper. When he first came out (and he came out to his parents following a Tina Turner concert, which is probably one of the best coming out stories ever!), he found that the first club he went to was a bit too intense, and felt more able to be himself and to explore his identity in a room full of lesbians! Do you have any memories of Bean's Bar, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos! You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod) Find out more about Markus by visiting his website (https://markushamence.com/), or following him on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/markushamence/).

Emma Goswell, radio presenter and host of Coming Out Stories, talks about her queer awakening through Les Miserables. She discusses the Manchester lesbian bar Follies and the north-south rivalry in England. The podcast explores coming out experiences, the acceptance of the word 'lesbian,' flirting, insecurities, reflections on past relationships, and promoting listener participation.