A Jaded Gay

The term gaydar, a colloquialism referring to the intuitive ability of a person to assess another’s sexual orientation, has been thrown around casually in the media and among the gay community. However, is there any truth to this concept?In this episode, we take a look at the early origins of gaydar, the science behind the phenomenon, and how advancements in technology may be able to identify a person’s sexual orientation from a photo.Additional ResourcesGaydar Definition (Urban Dictionary)Gaydar Definition (Green's Dictionary of Slang)What is Gaydar? Does it Work Like Other Gay Dating Apps, and Can I Join for Free?Detection of Sexual Orientation by Heterosexuals and HomosexualsAccuracy of Judgments of Sexual Orientation from Thin Slices of BehaviorGaydar: Visual Detection of Sexual Orientation Among Gay and Straight MenThe Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation?The Truth About "Gaydar"Inferences About Sexual Orientation: The Roles of Stereotypes, Faces, and the Gaydar MythDeep Neural Networks are More Accurate Than Humans at Detecting Sexual Orientation from Facial ImagesThis Psychologist’s "Gaydar" Research Makes Us Uncomfortable. That’s the Point.The Invention of AI "Gaydar" Could be the Start of Something Much WorseGaydar (2002)Gaydar (2013)Support the showGet Your Merch

In America, there has been a decrease in the number of teenagers who’ve received formalized sex education over the years. And for LGBTQ+ youth, inclusive sex education is practically nonexistent.In this episode, we’re taking a look at the current state of sex education in America, the lack of inclusive education for LGTQ+ youth, and how we can be advocates for inclusive, formalized sex education.Additional Resources:The State of Sex Education in America in 2022The 2019 National School Climate SurveyLet's Talk About (Queer) Sex: The Importance of LGBTQ-inclusive Sex Education in SchoolsIncluding LGBT-Content in Sex Education: Four Wrong Ways (and One Right One)A Call to Action: LGBTQ Youth Need Inclusive Sex EducationPlanned ParenthoodAdvocates for YouthSIECUSSupport the showGet Your Merch

At the start of a romantic relationship, it’s exciting to receive positive affirmations and affection from your partner. However, if this affection becomes exaggerated and excessive, it can lead to a manipulative cycle of abuse.In this episode, we look into what love bombing is, common red flags, and how to heal after being love bombed.Additional Resources:Love Bombing (Psychology Today)Spotting Narcissistic Love Bombing: What It Is — and Isn’tIdealize, Devalue, Discard: The Dizzying Cycle of NarcissismWhat Is ‘Love Bombing’?What to Know About 'Love Bombing,' the Trend That's Ruining Dating for EveryoneWhat is Love Bombing? 11 Ways to Spot this Relationship Red FlagEmpath Definition'Love Bombing': What It Is, Why It's Dangerous, and How to Protect YourselfSupport the showGet Your Merch

The history of horror goes back more than 250 years and has depicted queer themes since its origins. From Frankenstein to Freddy Krueger, horror has always been queer.In this episode, we’re taking a look at the history of the horror genre, queer coded representation in horror literature and film, and modern-day depictions of queer characters.Additional Resources:Britannica - Horror StoryGothic LiteratureThe History of Horror is GayGuessing the Mould: Homosocial Sins and Identity in Horace Walpole's The Castle of OtrantoQueering Gothic in the Romantic AgeThe History of Horror is the History of QueernessDid Mary Shelley Lose Her Virginity on Her Mother’s Grave?Did Mary Shelley Keep Her Late Husband’s Heart?Famous Bis: Mary ShelleyLesbian Representation in the Vampire Classic CarmillaThe Queer Life of Bram StokerOut of the Shadow of ‘Nosferatu’A Nightmare On Elm Street Part 2 Freddy's Revenge 1985 Film Clips I've Got The BrainsThe Nightmare Behind the Gayest Horror Film Ever MadeWelcome to Our Nightmares: Behind the Scene with Today's Horror ActorsGet Out: The Rise and Rise of Queer Horror33 Essential LGBTQ+ Horror MoviesTop 100 Gay Horror FilmsEleftheria by Rob LovelessSupport the showGet Your Merch

On October 8, 1998, a 21-year-old college student was picked up from a gay bar, tortured, and murdered because of his sexuality in a state that had no hate crime laws to protect him. More than twenty years later, we continue to remember his life and legacy.In this episode, we discuss the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard, the United States’ reaction, and the impact this tragic event had in bringing about stricter hate crime legislation.Additional Resources:Matthew ShepardMatthew Shepard, Victim of Anti-Gay Hate Crime, DiesMatthew Shepard: The Murder that Changed AmericaWitnesses Trace Brutal Killing of Gay StudentBeaten Gay Student Dies; Murder Charges PlannedMcKinney Gets Two Life SentencesGay Murder Trial Ends With Guilty PleaTwo Decades After Matthew Shepard's Death, LGBTQ Community Still Battles Hate ViolencePresident Clinton During Departure Statement (1998) (Matthew Shepard)Celebrity Vigil For Matthew ShepardThe Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act / Matthew Shepard ActMatthewsPlace.comSupport the showGet Your Merch

Many of us grew up knowing we were different than our peers, feeling like being “other” and fearing rejection at an early age. Therefore, it’s no surprise that gay men experience increased rates of anxiety compared to their straight peers.In this episode, we’re taking a look at anxiety disorders, unique factors that negatively impact gay men’s mental health, and strategies we can implement to better manage our stress.Additional Resources:National Alliance on Mental Illness: Anxiety DisordersIs There an Anxiety Epidemic?Understanding Anxiety and Depression for LGBTQ PeopleThe Mental Health Issues Gay Men Deal With11. Overcoming Internalized HomophobiaAnxiety Treatment Without Medication: Seven Holistic Ways to CopeWhen in Doubt, Shout It Out! Eight Drug-Free Ways to Battle AnxietyJust-Records: Dan Yost (Podcast Editor)Eleftheria by Rob LovelessSupport the showGet Your Merch

Previously, we discussed our iconic pop queens and how their songs typically fit into distinct categories that hit an emotional button that appeals to gay men.In this episode, we kick off the inaugural Gay Icons deep dive with none other than…Kylie Minogue. The highest-selling female Australian artist of all time, Kylie’s career has spanned five decades and taught us how to be vulnerable and resilient.Additional Resources:Episode 04. Pop Icons and Their Gay Emotional AppealGay Icons: My Name is Kylie PlaylistSupport the showGet Your Merch

It’s no secret that cities are typically more tolerant of the LGBTQ+ community, and a larger city allows for greater opportunities in general, as well as a larger dating pool. But how did the iconic gay neighborhoods we all know and love come to be?In this episode, we're taking a look at the history of gay villages, their core themes that attract LGBTQ+ people, and how gayborhoods have fallen victim to gentrification.Additional Resources:Between World Wars, Gay Culture Flourished In BerlinThe Wall Street of 16th-Century Venice : The Ghetto of VeniceGayest Cities in America 2022Top 10 Gay Cities in the WorldWorld's Best Gay CitiesWhy Gayborhoods Matter: The Street Empirics of Urban SexualitiesA Survey of LGBT AmericansOnce a Crucial Refuge, ‘Gayborhoods’ Lose L.G.B.T.Q. Residents in Major CitiesWhen It Comes to Gentrification, LGBTQ People are Both Victim and PerpetratorWhy Gayborhoods MatterSupport the showGet Your Merch

We’re all familiar with the F word (rhymes with maggot) and, unfortunately, we’ve probably been called it at some point in our lives. But where did this slur come from?In this episode, we’re taking a look into the etymology of the word and discussing its reclamation by some in the LGBTQ+ community.Additional Resources:Oxford English DictionaryThe Fa-Word: An Insulting Slur In the SpotlightThe Hobo : The Sociology of the Homeless ManInfo and Pics on "The F Word"...The New York Times - Theater: The F WordReclaiming the F Word is a Tricky Business21 Words the Queer Community Has Reclaimed (and Some We Haven't)Why I'm Reclaiming the Homophobic Slur I Used to FearSupport the showGet Your Merch

We previously talked about the concept of interpersonal vulnerability and why it can be harder for gay men to open up to a significant other. However, connection is an integral part of life—especially when it comes to romantic relationships.In this episode, we’re going deeper by discussing the importance of connecting with your partner through building emotional intimacy.Additional Resources:Emotional Intimacy, Sexual Desire, and Sexual Satisfaction Among Partnered Heterosexual MenHow to Build Emotional Intimacy with Your Partner — Starting TonightDevelopment and Validation of the Emotional Intimacy ScaleExperts Explain What Emotional Intimacy in a Relationship Actually Looks LikeGay Men & Our Desire for Deep ConnectionCouple Communication, Emotional and Sexual Intimacy, and Relationship Satisfaction05. Interpersonal Vulnerability: Overcoming the Fear of RejectionSupport the showGet Your Merch