Thinking Big: Mindset, Habits, and Hacks

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today is part 4 in a special 14 day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. Today’s challenge is on the second step of Faith I recently hosted a live 14 days Think and Grow Rich challenge that benefited Feeding America and I thought it would be great to put the challenge right here on the podcast.  So for 14 straight days I will be releasing a new podcast and the associated challenge that covers each of the 13 steps of Think and Grow Rich plus a bonus challenge on the introduction. It doesn’t matter if you have ever read the book or not, the challenge is designed for anyone to do. There is a link in the show notes so you can sign up for free and get download all of the challenge worksheets and a PDF copy of the original Think and Grow Rich Today we are thinking big and talking about the second step of success, The chapter on Faith, the state of mind which may be induced, or created, by affirmation or repeated instructions to the subconscious mind.  The 14-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. https://www.sean-osborn.com/14daychallenge Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/   Ratings and reviews directly impact search rankings for the Thinking Big Podcast. So please help and rate and review the podcast. Episode Transcription: industry and in the past. So let's go over a few quotes that are about faith, faith in ourselves. Um, Martin Luther King jr. Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step Wallace D Wattles. Things are not brought into being by thinking about their opposite. How many times? I mean, everybody can think and grow rich, but most of the time we think and grow poor, right? You cannot have a, if you're always thinking about B Howard white faith can move mountains, doubt can create them. (02:37): George Seaton, faith is believing in things when common sense tells you not to when competency common sense. I don't like common sense. Common sense is overrated. So we are on the chapter of faith. Welcome to tonight to start this off, we'll just read part of the actual intro to this, uh, to this chapter. Dave is visualization of and belief and attainment of your desire. And that is big there. It's not just, you know, belief in yourself, essentially it's visualization of and belief in attainment of what you desire. You know, if you don't see and feel your dream in your dream in your mind, you're never going to see it in the physical reality. You're never going to see that and let's go to page 45. And this is, you know, right at the beginning of the chapter page, excuse me, line 13 through 16. Faith is the head chemist of the mind when faith is blended with the vibration of thought, the subconscious mind instantly picks up the vibration, translates it into the spiritual equivalent and transmits it to infinite intelligence. (03:53): Now my think and grow rich mashed mind, we dive deep into infinite intelligence, what it is, how you get it. And we really dive deep into that, but this is so, so important. And did anyone from yesterday build their future memory? You know, one of the, one of the steps or the challenges from yesterday was to do your, you know, your statement of desire and build a future memory of it. Remember your future. When we build that memory, it is so important that you do that. And they is a state of mind which may be induced or created by affirmations or repeated instructions to the subconscious mind. It says that right in the book through the principles of autosuggestion that's tomorrow is out of suggestion, but they and autosuggestion go hand in hand. And this is why repeating your affirmations twice daily is so important. (04:47): That's why reading your statement of desire twice every day, feeling it, seeing it twice a day is so important. And how do we, you know, part of what this challenge is is how do we do these things? You know, how do we, how do we do these steps? How do we get to them? And so, so how do we build faith in our success? Well, I'll tell you the three to me, the three biggest things in building the faith is one confidence in what you're doing, builds faith. If you have confidence in what you are doing, it will build faith in your ability to do it accurate knowledge in what you're doing, builds faith. That's why accurate knowledge is so important. You got to know when you do a, you're going to get results. You got to have that accurate knowledge, and that builds faith in your potential. (05:40): It builds faith in you and knowing these 13 steps will absolutely build faith. These 13 steps build incredible faith that you can achieve, what you're setting out to achieve. And all of the greats have, you know, all the grades do this. They all talk about this. Yeah, I'm not sure if you, uh, like Tony Robbins, you know, Tony Robbins has a fantastic, uh, if you've ever followed me ever do this, he has a four box, uh, method of looking at this, basically the same thing. And he has four boxes. One, the bottom box is belief, which is faith certainty, you know, certainty in what you're doing. Faith belief above that as potential. Then you have actions and then below that you have results. So it's four boxes. And what it's doing is it's kind of a graphical way of showing you that the faith that you have in yourself, the belief, your certainty, and doing something, builds your potential, your potential then builds that that's what your actions are done. (06:40): Your actions are based on what you think your potential is. And those actions create results. And it's a vicious cycle either, either up or down. So your results then build into your beliefs, build into your certainty. So the higher you go, the higher your beliefs are the higher your potential. And it's a circle up. It's a always going up, but it can always go down too. As a matter of fact, thinking big, you know, my coaching thinking, big coaching, you know, my thinking big is a methodology and the B I G and big do the same thing. The B is for beliefs. That's your faith in yourself? That's the bleeping yourself. That's the certainty in yourself that generates more imagination. That's the eye. So when you believe, if you know, and you have faith that you can make $10 an hour, well, it's not hard to imagine, use your imagination to do 15. (07:31): It's not hard to imagine a little bit higher than you are in anything. What you're doing. If I can do this, then I can imagine a little bit more. And then the G is growth, which is a combination of your actions and your results. So again, it's the same way. We're all talking about the same thing. You know, your certainty, your beliefs, going into your imagination, going into your growth and your actions and your results. They're all tied together. So in addition to having that intense burning desire for riches or whatever it is that you're wanting, you know, that obsession really more than a burning desire, it's really an obsession. You must also have unwavering faith and belief in you in your ability to achieve it. You know, faith and belief is one of the most to me is one of the most important keys in converting your dreams, your thoughts into reality, you know, faith, it actually works on a subconscious level. (08:27): You know, it moves you towards your goal. If you have faith in yourself and your plans to achieve whatever it is, your wealth, whatever it will actually, when you have that faith that actually prompts or gathers or knows, or sees ideas and associations that lead you to success in that dream, you have, we talked about it. You know, I think in day one, you know, my philosophy on, uh, you know, the, the poorest theory, you know, the second I got when I all of a sudden started seeing it. So when you are focused on and have faith in a certain thing, you're going to start seeing that all around you. If you have faith in, in negative things, you're going to see those negative things around you. So having that faith is absolutely critical. And here's the thing. If you lack faith and believe the opposite, you'll be defeated every single time you will be defeated. (09:19): And that's when I talk about, you know, most people, you know, everyone can think and grow rich, but most people think and grow poor. And the thing is, is you don't even have to be consciously aware of the negative thoughts. You have thoughts going on, subconsciously that you're not even aware of that are going on. And those subconscious thoughts will either good or bad. So what we're trying to do is we're going to plant those good ones in we're going to plant them those. So it is critical to develop faith that really propels you toward your goal toward your dream. You know, faith inspires others to help you. You know, one of the things that we're gonna go over in this is the mastermind. That is one of the most important steps for me within think and grow rich is getting those people around you and doing masterminds and having access to the mastermind. (10:13): And it's hard to get people into a mastermind. If, if you don't even have faith in what you're doing, if you have faith in what you're doing and what you're gonna be doing is going to work, it's easier to get others to work with you. You know, this is, you know, that is literally by constantly telling yourself that you can succeed. You know, you have to have that faith and you do that by constantly, constantly telling yourself you can succeed. And more than that, it's envisioning yourself succeeding. It's what I was talking about is remembering your future. And one of the things that Hill talks about in the chapter is you eventually become a believer. You begin to, you know, you eventually become to believe the things that you repeat yourself, positive and negative. And here's the thing by default, we are absolutely fantastic at the negative. (11:03): We're constantly telling ourselves negative thoughts. And, and part of that day, one challenge was making the tick, Mark being consciously aware of every time we had those negative thoughts, we have those all the time. And you really, what I do is go beyond just envisioning your success. You know, you can see it, you can feel it. I want you to act as though you already have it, and I'm not talking about fake it till you make it. I'm talking about actually acting as though you have it. So let's say one of your goals is to be financial. You want to think, and you want to go rich. You want to have the freedom. You want to have the money, go out to dinner once a month, or once a quarter to a nice restaurant where that nice bottle of wine, don't worry about the money. (11:50): Don't, don't worry about how much it costs. Go do it act is if you were already there, because I'll tell you what, when you do that, your mind takes on the vibration of that thought that's dominating right there. It takes on you. You were at a different vibration when you're doing that. So I always tell people, act as if you have an alter ego of that person, you want to be, don't fake it till you make it act as if you already have it. And one of the challenges today is, you know, he, a Hill has in the book is what he calls his self-confidence formula. And it's part of, you know, again, it's part of today's challenge. I call it the success confidence formula. This is really something that we need to do to be successful, not just for ourselves. And it's five things it's in the book. (12:42): I think, I can't remember what, uh, what page it's on, but it's five things that you need to memorize and you need to do every day. And you're going to sign off, you know, part of the challenges you're going to sign off that you're going to memorize these things and you're going to repeat them. Now. I want to know it was quite a few, so I'm not going to go, or it's quite long each one. So I'm not going to go through all of it, but I'm gonna give you kind of a cliff note of what each one is for the first one is you're telling yourself affirmations that I know I have the ability to achieve my specific goal. And I mean, specific goal. Remember in day one, you gotta be down to the damn penny. If it's financial, you gotta, you gotta be very specific. (13:21): Number two is I will concentrate my thoughts for 30 minutes a day on the person I intend to become. That's the, you know, acting as if 30 minutes a day act as if you're that person act as if you already have what you're dreaming about. Spend in a third one is spend 10 minutes a day demanding self-confidence of you demand 10 minutes demand. Self-confidence number four is my goal determines that I develop self competence to achieve it, your goal demands. And if it doesn't demand that you develop self competence to get it, then it's not a very big goal. It's not something worthy of you going after. And number five is I will cultivate positive thoughts towards myself and others. That is such a biggie because I'm telling you, we are so negative in our thoughts all the time, and we don't even know it. (14:19): We don't even realize it. And again, that's what the day one was putting a tick Mark. Every time you, I just want you to become consciously aware when you do that. So you can eliminate it. Cause again, these are, these are at the subconscious level. We don't even notice that we're, we're doing some of these. So the second part of the challenge is really towards that is cultivating positive thoughts, thoughts towards ourselves. And as we're going to learn is autosuggestion or self-suggestion or, you know, doing these things and telling ourselves these things absolutely matters. So the second part of the challenge is besides doing what's in the book. So this is kind of what's in the book. The second part is I want you to write down five of your limiting beliefs in the opposite, in the opposite. And let me give you an example. (15:05): So for example, one of my limiting beliefs was that I was stupid. I had a limiting belief that I was stupid for so long because of where I came from him. And you know what my background is. So I thought I was stupid. You know, my, instead of my limiting, instead of my belief, I'm stupid. My limiting belief might be, uh, I would read something like I have all the knowledge I need and the things I am passionate about. I have the knowledge to help people conquer their dreams. So I want you to write down five of your negative beliefs in the negative, in a positive light. And whenever you're doing this, I want you to repeat your negative beliefs, your opposite, negative beliefs. We, the thing that we have to do is we have to start magnetizing our mind towards the positive things. Thoughts are things, they're everything, and getting a good representation of where you're at and what to do to gain faith. (16:03): So all of this will build your faith. That what you're doing is right. It's building fate, that what you're doing is going to work. What you're doing is absolutely there for you. And I'm going to tell you this, it is impossible, impossible for you to have a dream or an idea and not be capable of doing it impossible. If you have an idea, I don't care how many times you say I can't do that. I'm not big enough for that, or I can't, I don't know the people. And if you have an idea and you pulled it from infinite intelligence, you are fully capable of doing it. You would not be able to have that idea if you weren't. So today we're building the faith that you can do it. We're hacking your subconscious mind. This is a way to hack your subconscious mind and start putting in crap that we want, instead of the stuff that, that just goes in naturally the negative crap that goes in naturally work. We're putting in stuff that we want. So now we're hacking the subconscious mind. We're building our own fate and what we can do. So until tomorrow, tomorrow is another good one. Tomorrow is on, autosuggestion, goes hand in hand with this because autosuggestion is the way that we really hack our subconscious mind. That that is the tool we use to hack our subconscious mind. So tomorrow I will see you at seven o'clock.

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. This is part 3 in a special 14 day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. I recently hosted a live 14 days Think and Grow Rich challenge that benefited Feeding America and I thought it would be great to put the challenge right here on the podcast.  So for 14 straight days I will be releasing a new podcast and the associated challenge that covers each of the 13 steps of Think and Grow Rich plus a bonus challenge on the introduction. It doesn’t matter if you have ever read the book or not, the challenge is designed for anyone to do. There is a link in the show notes so you can sign up for free and get download all of the challenge worksheets and a PDF copy of the original Think and Grow Rich Today we are thinking big and talking about my favorite chapter in the book, The chapter on Desire, The starting point of all achievement. And the first step in having success in anything that you do.  The 14-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. https://www.sean-osborn.com/14daychallenge   Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Ratings and reviews directly impact search rankings for the Thinking Big Podcast. So please help and rate and review the podcast.

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. This is part 2 in a special 14 day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. Based on the book Think and Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill. I recently hosted a live 14 days Think and Grow Rich challenge that benefited Feeding America and I thought it would be great to put the challenge right here on the podcast.  So for 14 straight days I will be releasing a new podcast and the associated challenge that covers each of the 13 steps of Think and Grow Rich plus a bonus challenge on the introduction. It doesn’t matter if you have ever read the book or not, the challenge is designed for anyone to do. There is a link in the show notes so you can sign up for free and get download all of the challenge worksheets and a PDF copy of the original Think and Grow Rich Today we are thinking big on the persistence, the eighth step to Think and Grow Rich. The 14-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. https://www.sean-osborn.com/14daychallenge   Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/   Until challenge day 3, remember to always think big Ratings and reviews directly impact search rankings for the Thinking Big Podcast. So please help and rate and review the podcast.   Podcast Transcript (00:00): Welcome to the thinking big podcast today is part two and a special 14 day think and grow rich challenge. I recently hosted a live 14 day think and grow rich challenge that benefited feeding America. And it actually helped each person actually helped 400 people. Absolutely amazing. And I thought it would be great to put this challenge right here on the podcast. So for 14 straight days, I will be releasing a brand new podcast and associated challenge that covers all 13 steps in think and grow rich plus a bonus challenge on the introduction. And it doesn't matter if you've ever read the book or not. This challenge is designed for anybody to do. There is a link in the show notes, so you can go sign up. You can watch the videos, you can download all of the challenge, worksheets and a free PDF copy of the original book think and grow rich. So today we're thinking big on persistence, the eighth step in think and grow rich. (01:03): Welcome to the thinking big podcast with Sean Osborne, the show helping you think bigger and to your life and potential Sean believes, but equipping you with the tools, strategies, and philosophies required to be successful in all aspects of your life. You can achieve anything you believe in empowering. Our own growth makes a deeply positive and lasting impact on our lives community and our world. Now here's Sean. (01:28): I want to welcome everybody tonight. Tonight is the challenge on persistence. This is a very important one and it's step eight, but I'm bringing it to step one, bring it to perse because there's a surprise at the end on today's challenge. So I want to, again, I want to welcome everybody. It's such an honor to be here, such an honor to do this, and I want to welcome everybody to this challenge. This is a fantastic 14 day challenge. Day two. Here we go. Now again, this challenge is about doing rather than learning. So I'm not going to spend a whole bunch of time on these steps, teaching the steps we're going to do 20 minutes a night, 25 minutes a night at most going over kind of the, the step some of the content, maybe some of the things that stick out for me and go over the challenge of what we're going to do for the challenge for the day. (02:20): And again, it's about doing rather than about knowing, and you don't have to, you know, you've never had to have read the book in order to do this challenge. You can do this challenge without ever reading think and grow rich. I've distilled the, you know, the, the challenge of the day out based on what's in the, in the chapter and you can, there's a hundred different challenges you can do on each chapter. And what we're going to do is we're actually gonna focus most of this challenge on your thoughts, because thoughts are things, but we're going to, we're going to really focus this challenging on your current thoughts, where they are kind of take inventory where you're at now, and what will your thoughts have be when you get to your destination, when you get to your, when your goal, your dream, if you're there, what thoughts are you going to have at that point? (03:07): So that's really what, this is what this is about. And again, it's about doing, because how many times have you read a great book or gone to a seminar or listen to a, an audible and said, and that's a fantastic idea. I'm going to implement that in my life. And you just never do. That's what this challenge is about. And before we start every time, again, this is not employing Hill's stuff. He was simply a, you know, a knowledge broker. He interviewed, you know, 500 of the most successful people at the time and sorted out what they did, what they had in common. So, and, and all the great thought leaders, all the great people, all say the same thing, because there's really only one way for success. And there's a law of success. And that's what this book really, really teaches. But, you know, I, I want to start off each time with quotes based on that that step. (04:02): So tonight step is persistence. So I want to do a few quotes on persistence from other people that earn true in alignment with what is saying. So John D Rockefeller, I do not think there's another quality. So essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature, H Jackson Brown jr. In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins, not through strength, but through perseverance, Walter Elliot, perseverance is not a long race. It is many short races, one after another Vince Lombardi, the difference between a success person and others is not the lack of strength. It's not the lack of knowledge, but rather the lack of will. And I've given you the book download it's line numbered because every once in a while, we'll go into things. So if you go to line page, excuse me, page one 68 in the persistence chapter, we're going to line three 24 through three 26. (05:19): The only break anyone can afford to reply, rely upon as a self made break. These come through the application of persistence. The starting point of definiteness of purpose persistence is the essential factor for the process of transforming your ideas into their physical reality. You have to be persistent to do that. You can't do it any other way. And without persistence, you will be defeated even before you start. If you do not have persistence, you're done, that's it. And that's well pack up your bags with persistence. You win. That is pretty cut and dry the way he says that without persistence, you will, you will be defeated even before you start with persistence, you will win. Wow, it's pretty clear. So the question really becomes, so how can we build, you know, or manufacturer persistence? You know, how can we do that? Well, he'll go through eight definite causes of persistent in the book, and we'll quickly go through those, a definiteness of purpose. (06:30): You know, knowing what you want is probably one of the most important things that you have. You know, this is what breathes life into, you know, whatever task you're embarking upon. You have to have a clear and definite purpose desire. That's tomorrow's step tomorrow's challenge desire. Oh man, I'm telling you easy to be. It is when you have a burning desire, it is so easy to be persistent in what you want when that desire is burning, it's driving you. You're not driving it. That builds persistence. You know, and, and the weaker that, you know, he talks about this, the weaker, the flame, the weaker, the heat. And if you want more heat, you got to build more blame. You, you got to build that pipe. You've got to have the burning brick and desire. You got to have a fricking obsession and it becomes the fuel that really ignites your purpose into action. (07:25): And then he talks about self reliance and self-reliance is really the belief that you can do something. So let me ask you this. If you knew a hundred percent, that, that next step, the next, the next goal in the process, if you knew a hundred percent that you could do it, would you be more persistent in getting it done? I would say so. So that's what self-reliance is. And all the people talk about that. You know, if you follow, you know, Tony Robins at all, you know, he has this four squares. It's, you know, I think it's a God. I can't remember what it is, but it's a, you know, what you think your potential is your actions, your results, and that builds your certainty and your belief. So that belief that self-reliance gets bigger and it's a full circle. My thinking big, the big, you know, that's a framework, the biggest for belief, that's that reseller Alliance. (08:14): If you believe you can imagine, then you can imagine more if you're, if you're, if your belief is that you're at $50,000 a year, you can imagine $60,000 a year that goes into the G, which is your growth, which is your actions and your results. So then you're at 60. Then you can imagine you, so your belief now is at 60. Well, you can imagine now I can 75. Well, that channels the year and your actions and results, and you grow and you're 75. So you have to have that self reliance and know that you can achieve what you're dying to do. You have to have definiteness of plan, you know, an organized plan, even a crappy plan is better than, than none. You have to have steps. You have to have, you have to stay in action. You don't have to have the entire plan. (09:05): You just have to have the next step in your plan. You have to have the next, I remember when I was doing an Ironman and I went from basically not being able to run, swim, or bike, to doing an Ironman, you can't do that overnight. You have to chunk it down. I had plans. I paid for plans this week. It took me two years. You know, this week we're going to do this this week. We're going to do this this week. We're going to do this plans for every day. For over a year plans, you have to have those plans. You chunk it down. What's the next thing in the plan that you can do? You know, it makes even the most taunting thing. You know, I never knew a million years thought I would, I do an iron man, but it takes those. And when you chunk them down, it makes the, even the most wildest dream manageable with what you're doing, you have to have accurate knowledge, you know, knowing that your plan is going to work, get you more persistent. (10:00): When you know that if you do a, B and C, you're going to get D when, you know, when you have accurate knowledge, that that's what you're gonna do. And it works. That creates persistence, you know, maximizing the effectiveness really of your, of your plans. And you have to have that specialty. And that's what the whole thing is on specialized knowledge. You have to have cooperation, you know, harmonious cooperation with others helps build persistence. You have to have other people involved. And that's kind of where the mastermind group comes in. And we're going to go over that. And one of the challenge you'll run groups. If you ever run, you, you, you had the Kumar comradery, you've got the, you know, support system. You you're not, if you find anybody that's successful, they have not done it alone. There has been a team of people that have helped them along. (10:48): You know, this creates when you bring other people, it really creates the magic of energy and it builds without a doubt, persistence, a willpower. You have to have the habit of concentrating your thoughts on building your plan. You know, it keeps you going through the grind when you got to drill it out sometimes, but then you build the habit and the habit persistent is a direct result of habit. And I want to explain it to you. And again, I do running into just so I have a lot of analogies of running and, and, and that kind of stuff. But when I first started running, I couldn't run to my cupboard without getting winded. I didn't have the habit of running. So it was a chore. It was so hard to force myself to out and run. It was excruciating. And then all of a sudden I look back and I had built the habit of doing it. (11:44): I was no longer going to run running was running me. You know, you, you've got to do the thing before you get the energy to do the thing I had to go and do, build the habit of doing the thing to running before I really had the habit of going and doing it for you. It was running me. You have to build a habit because habit will absolutely keep persistence going and going and going. And I'm telling you, the lack of persistence is the major cause of failure. You find anybody that's failed and I can tell you, they lacked persistence. How long do you have to persist until how long do I have to go until, until your dream? Is there any idea that you have, you're automatically capable of getting, if you've got a great idea of you've got a dream, you, you can't do that and not be, you know, automatically restores to get it. (12:43): The only thing that stopped you from you and your dream is giving up. Some people do it at the first sign. Some people, you know, after a year, some people, but you don't give up, you keep getting up. If you get knocked down 99, you get up a hundred. You just keep going. And that's the number. One thing that causes people to fail is persistence. You can have a, not a bad desire and, and still make it. If you're, if you're persistent and you don't have to be the strongest, you don't have to be, you know, the smartest you don't have to, you just have to be the most persistent. And there are four simple steps and they're actually in the, in the town. So here's, here's a day's challenge. It's two, a two sheets, but there's a, there's a bonus challenge in here. And he talks about here. (13:28): He talks about, there are four simple steps leading to the habit of persistence, a definite purpose, backed by a bird, a burning desire for its fulfillment. A definite plan expressed in continuous actions. We're talking about that. Build a plan. What's the next step. Continuous action. You don't stop. You build the momentum. You keep going. You keep going. And this is a good one. A mind close tightly against all negative and discouraging influences, including I would say not only including, I'd say especially negative suggestions of relatives, friends, and acquaintances. Let me tell you, your friends and family are full of BS and that's belief system. They are full of their belief system, and they're going to do everything they can to keep you from getting hurt. You know, they love us. They don't give us these negative things cause they don't want us to succeed. They don't want us to win. (14:22): They don't want us to, you know, don't have the crab. They're not trying to pull us down. Human nature is we we're, we're made to survive, not be happy. We're made to survive. They do not want to see us get hurt. So we got to close their mind tightly to their BS or else we listened to them. You know, we're not good enough. Maybe, maybe this isn't the right time. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe I don't know the right people. It's all BS. It's all in the belief system. So don't do not listen to them. A friendly Alliance with one or more people who will encourage you to follow through with both plans and purpose. And this is what I'm talking about. We're going to get into this. I don't know which day it is, but the mastermind we're going to help create the mastermind group. (15:06): This is when you go up and you, you create your Alliance, you know, how are you going to create your lions to keep you going during the tough times that are going to keep you motivated that are going to keep you persistent. The first part of the challenge really is the second page. And this is something I'm gonna read this directly. This is directly from the book and study this list carefully and face yourself squarely. If you really wish to know who you are, these are the weaknesses that must be mastered to be successful. They must be mastered to be successful. And we'll just go over a few of them. I'm not going to go over all of them. This is the list is the printout symptoms of lack of persistence. And we've got to master these failure to recognize and clearly to find exactly what we want procrastination with or without cause usually backed up by a formidable array of alibis and excuses. (16:02): Hello? Yeah, we do that all the time. Lack of interest in acquiring specialized knowledge, you've got to always be learning. You've got to always be getting that specialized knowledge for whatever it is that you're dreaming, whatever it is that you're wanting, you've got to always be learning and getting that specialized knowledge in decision. The habit of passing the buck on all occasions instead of facing issues. Squarely also backed by alibis. Yeah, we do it. The habit of relying upon alibis instead of creating definite plans for the solutions to problems. Wow. Self satisfaction. I read this one wrong before. So it scared me. This is really self centered. So if you are self centered, this is one of the things in the book that he says there is, but little remedy for this affliction. If you are self-centered you better find a way to be unsafe centered because you're not going to be successful until you are not. (17:00): So self centered. You've got to give before you get in deference, usually reflected in one's readiness to a compromise on all occasions, rather than meet opposition and fight it. The habit of blaming others for one's mistakes and accepting unfavorable circumstances. By the way, that's my 150 pound great Dane down there barking up a storm. I love him, but he's so sometimes he's a butt weakness of desire due to the neglect of choice of motives. That impel action. Willingness, even eagerness, not just willingness, sometimes eagerness to quit at the first sign of defeat. How many times do we do that? We do it in diets. We do it in relationships. We do it in finances. That's a biggie willingness, or even eagerness, lack of organized plans. That habit of neglecting to move on ideas. Here's the thing. We played this video, or we played the audio yesterday. (18:00): Look right where you are. Don't be searching out in the future for what you need. It's it's already there. It's already in you willing, excuse me. The habit of neglecting to move on ideas or grasp the opportunity. When it presents itself, ideas are like babies. We've got to breathe life into them. We cannot, the second you have an idea. You've got to nurture that. How long if you had a baby and you neglected it for a couple of days, what do you think would happen? Yeah. Same with your ideas. Same thing. Your ideas are like babies. If you don't nurture them, they're going to die. Someone else will take them. You've heard that before. Oh, that was someone stole my idea. BS the habit of excuse me, wishing. Instead of willing the habit of compromising with poverty, instead of aiming for riches searching for all shortcuts to ridges, people think thinking we're rich is a shortcut to riches. (18:59): It is not a shortcut. It's a map, but it is not a shortcut. It is a law. It is a process, but it is not a shortcut. There is no shortcut. This is, I've seen so many successful people. Whether they read this book or not, and many successful people refer to this book is one of the things that helped them become successful, but you don't have to have the book to become successful, but every single person I've ever looked at that's been successful. I see these plans. I see these traits. I see these steps and what they have done. And here's the big one on that last one, fear criticism. How often has the fear of criticism stopped us from doing what we need to do, stopped us from doing what we want to do. That fear that you know, what are people going to think? (19:49): What are, what are people gonna do? The fear of criticism? It to me is one of the biggest ones that we have to master. We have to master that in order to become successful. Now here's the big challenge for the day. Oh, you're going to love this. Here's the big one. You gotta read chapter. This is by the way, this is why I pulled it from it's the eighth step, but I've pulled it. Number one, to give you a little bit of a buffer, I want to make sure that you complete this challenge. I want to make sure you win. I want to make sure that with this challenge, we feed 400 people. Every time someone completes this challenge, I'm giving you extra days. This is the longest challenge. This one by far takes more time than any of them. So for nine days straight, not nine days, total nine days straight. (20:35): I want you to read chapter nine, read chapter nine, not cliff notes, not audibles. I want you to read chapter nine for nine straight days and we'll visit this again at the end, but the reason I'm not going to give you that now we'll visit. Revisit it then. But how you do this is the one thing that my mentor told me. I didn't understand it, but how you do this is how you do everything. How you do this is how you do everything. So read chapter nine for nine straight days. If you miss a day, you start over again. So you can go up to day nine, Ms. Day nine and still still make it. Cause you have 18 days to complete this. Okay? So nine straight days, you're going to know the chapter. Well, I assure you. You will know this chapter very well after reading it nine times straight. So until tomorrow, tomorrow is on desire. Oh, it's a good one. I love desire. It is the starting point. It is the crux. It's the heart tomorrow desire do today's to do tonight's challenge. It'll take you about 35 minutes to read chapter nine, spend at least 30 minutes on this, or spend a good hour tonight, at least on the challenge. And I will see you guys tomorrow

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. This is part 1 in a special 14 day series.  We who are in this race for success, should be encouraged to know that this changed world in which we live is demanding new ideas, new ways of doing things, new leaders, new inventions, new methods of teaching, new methods of marketing, new books.  And back of all this demand for new and better things, there is one quality which one must possess to win, and that is DEFINITENESS OF PURPOSE, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning DESIRE to possess it. That statement could have been written this yesterday, but it was actually first published in 1937 (over 80 years ago) in the book Think and Grow Rich, or more appropriately Think and Grow Successful, by Napoleon Hill That is why this book has stood the test of time, and it is more relevant today than ever before. I recently hosted a live 14 days Think and Grow Rich challenge and I thought it would be great to put the challenge right here on the podcast. So for the next 14 days I will be releasing a new podcast and challenge that covers each of the 13 steps of Think and Grow Rich plus a bonus challenge on the introduction. It doesn’t matter if you have ever read the book or not, the challenge is designed for anyone to do. Today we are thinking big on the introduction to Think and Grow Rich. The 14-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge. Signup for free and download all the challenge worksheets. https://www.sean-osborn.com/14daychallenge Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/   All right, everyone. Here we go. I am so excited for this 14 day think and grow rich challenge. I want to welcome everybody that is tuning in that's that signed up that's online. I am absolutely honored to be able to do this. And it is just an amazing thing that we're able to get this done and get this going. Oh, this is such, such a great thing to do the goal of this think and grow rich challenge is more about doing than learning. And really, if you think about it, when we, you know, so many times I've read great books, I've listened to great audibles and I'll be reading and I'll be listening. I'll say, man, that is a fantastic idea. I really need to implement Nani. I need to do that. But then I never do. I don't do it. So this challenge is really about, rather than just keep learning and learning. (01:04): Learning is as I've taken and I've distilled down something within that chapter or something within that step, and I've made a challenge. I've made a tool to start moving you closer to your dreams, into your goals of being successful. And this challenge isn't about, you know, again, knowing the book, matter of fact, you can take this challenge whether or not you've ever read, think, and grow rich or not. These tools stand alone. You don't need to know, think and grow rich, although it will help you. It will absolutely help you. The next time you go to rethink and grow rich, or if you've already read it multiple times, it'll bring some clarity to some of the tools that you can get from thinking grow rich. And really the entire goal of doing this was to have you see where your thought patterns are, your thought habits are now, because again, the name of the book is think and grow rich. (02:05): It's about thought it's about our mind. And it's about these six inches between our ears. So we're going to the goal is to, you know, what are your thought habits now? You know, what are you thinking? What are the negative, the positive, you know, how are you thinking right now and really take an inventory of your thoughts and then what will your thoughts need to be? Or what will they be when you become successful when you reach that goal? No matter what it is, again, this isn't about money, whatever your goal is. So each day what we're going to do is we're going to do a 20 to 30 minute video or audio. And at the end, we're going to have a challenge on that, on that step. So for 14 days, we're going to, today's the introduction, which isn't even a damn chapter, but man, there's so much gold in it. (02:52): And then the 13 steps. So that's 14 days total for the 14 day challenge, 20 to 30 minute audio video, and then to go and actually do the challenge. And one of the things I really wanted to start off with is the biggest misconception of think and grow rich is that it's about money and it's absolutely not about money. It is about success. I don't care what it is you want to be the best at. I don't care what it is you want to be successful in. That's what this book is about. This is the law of success. Every successful person I've ever seen has followed these laws, whether they bred the book or not. And if you think about when the book was published, it was published in 1937, you know, it was after the 1918 pandemic which is very similar to what we're going through. (03:45): You know, we're kind of in the same type of situation was after the depression and people. That was the biggest thing on people's mind was money, but honestly the book should have been called, you know, think and grow successful. That's what the name of it should have been and think and grow rich isn't Napoleon Hill stuff. You know, he's just really a knowledge broker for all these other people. He, you know, 500 of the most successful people that he got to know and, and started seeing what their day to day was, what they did to become successful. So he really just documented what these other people were doing. This is this book. Isn't something that, you know, Napoleon Hill invented or did anything. This is about the documentation and of knowledge that he gained from talking with 500 of the most successful people. And he was really commissioned by Andrew Carnegie because he knew that there was a law to success. (04:42): He had lived it, and he knew that there was a law and he wanted to get that documented. And if you think about it, you don't absolutely do not need this book to be successful. But one of my friends, Ron, you know, he has a great saying for this that is very poignant about this is if it's success was on the other side of a big piece of land, a landmine. And on the other side of this land, mine was your success was your dream. How would you go across that land? Mine, anybody can just go across it, but how would you go across that landmine? I know what I would do. I would look to see someone who else has got over that landmine to that success. And I would take his footsteps. I wouldn't deviate a single bit. I would take every one of his footsteps all the way through, because if he can take those footsteps and be successful, I can be just as successful going through those exact same steps. (05:43): And I wish there was another way. I wish there was an easier way for success, but this is the only thing I have ever seen. These steps. These philosophies are the only thing I've ever seen. And everybody I've ever looked at everybody from, from artists to chefs, to, you know, business, every single one of them. I can see these laws of success from think and grow rich within them. And again, the book is about thinking. So I wanted to go over and just kind of a a brief overview of really how powerful the mind is. And, and some exercises I do in my mastermind just to show the vastness of what our mind does and people, you know, most people, especially listening to this, understand, you know, you have a consciousness, subconscious mind, the speed of which so I'm in it, I've been in it. (06:39): So I do, I have a lot of things that relate back to it just because it's something I know and it translates very well, but your, your conscious mind operates at about 2000 bits per second, not shabby, you know, 2000, you know, two K bits per second, not too bad. Your subconscious mind operates at 4 billion, 4 billion bits per second. And people talk about this in alderman things, but there's a book by Pam grout that it would take 8,000 average size novels to fit 4 billion zeros. So every second, you, you were basically comprehending 4 billion. It would take 8,000 average sized books to write 4 billion zeros at 2000. That is one half of 1 millionth of a percent of what you're processing. So you are consciously aware of only one half of 1 millionth of a percent of what your complete mind is actually processing. You know, and, and one of the other things that that was taught was, you know, how many pin dots can you do in a second? (07:46): So if you had a pen and you just, you know, tapping on the page and making dots, you know, how many dots could you do if let's say you did. the highest I've gone is like five or six dots per second, but let's just to make it easy. Let's say you could do 10 dots in a second on paper, you had a pen and you could do 10 every single second over and over and over and over again, it would take you only about three and a half minutes to do 2000 dots. It would take you 12.5 years to do 4 billion. That's how much processing power your subconscious mind has. It's unbelievable. You know, if you were to, for instance, move your finger consciously, it would take your conscious mind weeks, probably months to move your finger where your subconscious mind knows every ligament, every muscle, everything that needs to happen. (08:37): It knows to do that. And what you're consciously aware of is really based on your programming. It's based on who you are, where you've been, the things you've seen, what you've been programmed. And I like to call this the Porsche principle. And I say only because it became very apparent when, when I first, you know, one of, one of the things that I wanted more than anything was a porche. So when I finally, you know, got successful and enhance some money, I went out and bought a Porsche. And I'm telling you on the way home, all of a sudden at that corner, at that corner over there, there was a porch. There's a porch that is just like mine. But until I became consciously aware of that, I didn't notice those. But the second I became consciously aware, I started noticing those. And if you think about that, if we expand that out a little bit, if we're consciously aware of successful things, we're going to start seeing successful things out there. If we're in a negative state and, and we're, you know, we're going to start seeing negative things, that's all we're going to see out there. You know, for me, the only job the conscious mind should do is ID problems, formulate goals, and turn it over and get the hell out of the way. That's the only thing our conscious mind should be doing. One of the things that I like to, (10:03): To kind of talk about just because I think it shows the vastness of our mind is, think about a self driving car. Now, self driving, car Tesla, you know, the latest and greatest. This is the latest technology that we have for cars. You know that a Tesla, it's got multiple computers, running, everything. It's got, you know, sensors all the way around the car has got cameras all the way around the car. You know, it's sitting there driving, it's reading signs. It's seeing the distance between cars in front of it. It's seeing the, the lines in the road. It's seeing people come up behind, has all this power and all this technology. When you first started driving, you remember how hard it was. It was because you were driving consciously. You were trying to do all of that stuff at your slow ass, 2000 bits per second, and trying to drive at 2000 bits per second. You can't take in all that data, all that stuff, and process it with only 2000 bits per second. But what did you do after about two or three months, you completely turned over driving to your subconscious mind through habit. You completely nowadays, you you're sitting there driving down the road, eating, drinking, texting, looking through Facebook, listening to podcasts. I hope. And you did that within a couple months. You completely turned over that entire process in a few months without even realizing it. (11:35): And you didn't think twice about it. You didn't even think about, Hey, I've just turned that whole process over. That's the highest technology we have. Computers and cars is just doing what you did automatically in three to, you know, three to six months. That's just how powerful it is. And this book means so much to me because of what it has done to my life. It's explained so many things, you know, a brief story about me is I remember when I was 15 and I was living on my own and I was working menial jobs. I was washing dishes. I was working at subway shops, not, not subway. This was prior to subway, but working at a subway shops, washing dishes, you know, a dishwashing, I was doing all these jobs and I remember 15 on my own. And I just didn't know that there was a way out, I thought. (12:33): And I thought there has to be a better way. There has to be something that these other people are getting, that I'm not getting. You know, I would look around the restaurant when I was, you know, busing tables. I think it was somewhat of an upscale restaurant. And I would think, God, what are these people doing that I'm not doing? What do they have? I don't, how can they do what they do? I just didn't understand it. And luckily I got mentors and, you know, and did the steps within think and grow rich without think and grow rich, but with the same exact laws of success, and it completely changed my mind. In 15 years, I went from washing dishes, living on my own, high drop out. I actually kicked out in the ninth grade in 15 years to running my own company, multimillion dollar company that I started by the time I was 30. (13:26): So in 15 years, and that's one of the biggest things. People we just, we overestimate what we can do in a year. And we completely underestimate what we can do in 15 years or in 10 years now, going through this challenge, I really want you to have an open mind you know, even if the information does not fit with what your current belief system is, and we're going to be talking a lot about belief system and I call it BS. So belief system BS, your BS yeah. Is your belief system. And one of the things I wanted to play for you is I wanted to play a little thing from Napoleon Hill. And it has some great meaning, but I really wanted to bring him in on this. And, and, and have you get the feeling of his voice and, and, and what he was doing. So let's listen to this real quick. (14:19): And now may I reach out across the space and the time which separated us and offer you a hand of friendship and a sincere prayer that you will be blessed with a richer and fuller life because of this message, your big opportunity may be right where you are now follow these instructions faithfully. And it will reveal itself to you. This is Napoleon Hill saying, don't search for opportunity in the distance, but recognize it and embrace it right where you are. (14:54): Wow. Don't look for opportunity in the distance, recognize it and embrace it right where you are. That is really what this is, recognize what you have embrace it and move. That is that, that is some that is very, very powerful. Okay. So let's actually get into the challenge. So today's challenge is actually on the introduction. It's not one of the 13 steps. It is how many people actually read the damn introduction? I never read the damn introduction of a book, but it's an introduction it's and I have in the book, but there is so much gold in this introduction. And matter of fact, I think the newer versions of the book, it's actually not called the introduction anymore. I think it's a thoughts or things or the power of thought, and there's various different things. But I think that's what it's called now, because there is so much gold within this, within this chapter. (15:47): And you know, part of this challenge, you got the book to download and it's line number because we're going to every once in a while, we'll go into things and into the book and I'll read stuff from the book and I'll give you the line number and the page number, just so you can follow along or you can go back and reference it if you'd like. So we're going to start off right here at the beginning. Page 10 is the first damn paragraph of the introduction of the book. Truly thoughts are things and powerful things at that. Now he'll get to stop right there. And that's a complete sentence, right? But that's not the whole thing. And I think that's one of the biggest confusions people have when they come into, you know, personal development is, is they start hearing these things and they think, well, thoughts are things well, thoughts? (16:33): Aren't things. Thoughts are nothing. They're part of the ether. They're not things, but they are there things in their power things, but it's only when they are mixed with definiteness of purpose, persistence, and a burning desire for, for their translation into riches or other material objects. He puts it right there or other material objects. This isn't about money. He focused again on money because at the time I hate to tell you this, but that is, think about it as if one of your children or one of your family members was sick and you had to do one thing to raise the money, or you had to do something to help your level and get better. I guarantee that you would have one, a single desire, wouldn't be a multiple things. It would be get what you need to help your loved one. You'd be persistent as hell. (17:30): And you would have that burning desire. That's kind of where you want to be. And actually that's what the book. So the steps support you getting there. The 13 steps support you getting persistent support. You lighting a fire under your ass to have a burning, you know, support. You getting a definite NSF plans have a purpose. That's what the steps were about. And I think one of the best when he talks about the 50 cent lesson on persistence, and I don't know about you, but when I read that, it, it almost makes me sick to my stomach because of when this was written. You know, I think it's such a valuable thing in there, and it's such a powerful, but at the same time, it really does almost make me sick to my semi because how we as humans treated other humans, you know, we're going through a big race relations right now in, in, in this country and in the world. (18:27): And although we're better than we were when this, when this book was written, we still have a long ways to go. But if you look at the story for the story, absolutely demonstrates this young child nailed what success takes. She, this little child absolutely nailed it. If you've read, you know, if you've read it, you know, right. You know, she's, she has a definite purpose. She wants her, or she wants her money. She has desire a burning desire board. She's not leaving. And she is persistent. You think she's going to leave there? No, she won't leave there until she gets what she wants. But here to me, here's the most powerful portion of that little story. And that is right when the shit was about to hit the fan, you know, right. When he was going to come at her with a swatch, she did something extremely powerful. (19:23): She didn't bow down. She stepped forward and demanded what she wanted. She didn't just demand what she wanted. She stepped forward and demanded what she wanted. That is such a powerful, powerful story. Let's move on with this, with the chapter, let's go to page 10, line 22 through 27. And this is when Barnes wanted to go into business with Edison. Now let's think about that for a second. When Barnes wanted going, that is like me going to Elon Musk's office or Richard Branson's office and announcing, Hey, I'm, I'm coming into business with you. You know, Edison was no small person. This was, you know, the, the Elon Musk of the time. So let's read that, you know, when this desire or impulse of thought first splashed into his mind, and we're talking about Barnes here, he was in no position to act upon it, to difficulty student his way, one. (20:20): He did not know mr. Edison. It's like, he didn't even know him. And he did not even have enough money to pay his railroad, his railroad, a bear to orange, New Jersey. So think about it. This guy had this flash of an idea and thought, man, I want to go into business with mr. Edison. I'm going to go into business with mr. Edison. And he didn't even know didn't even know him. Didn't know how he was going to do it. And here's the thing. When any idea that we have, so that idea, he didn't know how he was going to do it. He didn't know, you know, didn't have the money for it. He didn't have the time, you know, he didn't have anything. And what do we do when we get these ideas? You know, when we have these, it's like putting a square peg in a round hole, when you have these ideas, the first thing that we normally think of is, (21:12): Oh man, that's a great idea, but I don't have the time. I don't have the resources. I don't know the people, you know, I don't know how I'm going to do that idea. And we just give up on that idea. And so move on to page 31 excuse me, page 10, line 31 through 36 is he presented himself and mr. Edison's laboratory announced that he had come to go into business with the inventor. And speaking of the first meeting between Barnes and Edison years later, mr. Edison said, he stood before me there. Or he stood there before me looking like an ordinary tramp. Basically he looked like a hobo to, to, to mr. Edison. But there was something in the expression of his face, which conveyed the impression that he was determined to get what he would come. He'd come for. Think about that. (22:06): How many times do you know, have you seen people that when you, when you meet them, you know, you know that that is their dominant, that you, you feel that before they come in the room, you know, the vibrations that we have, you know, we feel those vibrations of others before we even see them, the vibrations that we have. So he knew he was determined and Edison could not only listen to it, but he saw it. He felt it, he knew there was something different about the way Barnes presented himself. It's because he had the burning desire and the faith that he was going to do it. So today's challenge on introduction. Again, this is not one of the steps, but there is such good stuff within this chapter that we've got a challenge for today. And if you're, you know, if you're listening, if you're watching, there's going to be a link within, within whatever we're, whatever platform you're on to download the D the challenge for today. (23:05): So go download the challenge and actually do this work, do this every day as we move forward. And I guarantee by the end of 14 days, you're going to have a much clearer path and plan on how you're going to get what ever it is that you desire. So on the introduction, the first thing is write down the three things necessary to convert thought into their physical object, into the physical realm of things. And again, it's the definiteness of purpose. It's the burning fricking desire, and it's being persistent as shit until you get what you want. You know, success comes to those who are success conscious. This book builds that and the universe will provide what we hold in our mind, what we think we become. And then again, I'm trying to part of this, especially the beginning is I want to get us in a place where we take inventory of our thoughts. (24:05): We kind of know where we are. We can't do better until we know where we are until we have a good assessment of where we are. So there's three, basically three things on the, on the first page. And that is answer these spend 30 minutes doing these first one is what do you spend most time thinking about? Are these thoughts getting you closer or further from me, dreams sit down and, and what are, what are you really thinking? You know, you're going to have to sit down in a quiet spot and kind of take inventory of what you're thinking. And then also for the next 24 hours, I want you to place a tick Mark in this box. Every time you have a negative thought or limiting belief, you know, how many tick marks did you get? We're going to see a part of the part tomorrow. (24:47): We're going to, we're going to see how many tick marks you got. And I did this when I was first starting out in doing this stuff, and I was blown away by how many tick marks I have. I thought, yeah, I have some negative thoughts here and there. Oh, I'm stupid. Oh, I can do that. Who do you thank you are. I had so many tick marks. You might need an extra page. You might, I'll allow you to get an extra page to Mark all the tick marks. And what my goal with this is, as we start recognizing these limiting beliefs or these negative thoughts by making you Mark them down, you start seeing them, or you start getting more aware, you start realizing that you have them. And you'll be able to recognize them quicker because you're writing them down. (25:31): So write that, put a tick Mark, every time you have a negative thought. And then the next part is really just getting a self assessment of where you are. And we'll take this assessment again at the end. But this is really a success conscious self assessment. It's 20 questions, all of them are answered as always, sometimes, or never. And you get your total at the end, just gives you a good feeling of where you are, you know, where you are in the process of having a success conscious mind. Yeah. And you will see it. These are some great questions to make you think. So until tomorrow tomorrow's a challenge is going to be on desire, how you're gonna like that. It is a fantastic challenge as well. So do this work today, we're going to spend again, 20 to 30 minutes. Most of these challenges shouldn't take you more than 20 minutes to an hour at most. The one on imagination might take about an hour and a half, but in general, it's not going to take you a great deal of time, but let's do this. Let's actually get some work done instead of just reading a damn book, let's take the steps and let's do something. So until tomorrow I will see you guys love you. Bye.

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today we have a fantastic guest that is going to help us understand Why Your Digital Marketing Strategy Doesn't Work Now, and to help us uplevel our marketing strategies and connections to our groups and tribes. I wanted to bring Jason Wright onto the podcast because so many people I know are starting their own company, a side gig, or turning their passion into a business, and I always get asked about marketing. Jason is the Founder and CEO of Intentionally Inspirational, a marketing automation company. He is a Top-Rated freelancer on Upwork and an ActiveCampaign Certified Consultant  Jason is an author, entrepreneur, consultant, and digital marketing architect with a passion for helping other startups and small businesses with their sales funnels. Jason prides himself on his ability to connect with people and speak to them in a language they understand. Jason is able to design successful marketing plans all while keeping a positive attitude and sense of humor along the way. He teaches his clients and his audience, how to simplify their sales funnel while skyrocketing their results. Today we are going to think big into marketing. Get your free email sequence + screen share explainer video https://www.perfectemailsecrets.com/   Connect with Jason Wright at the following social media link: Website https://intentionallyinspirational.com/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/IntentionallyInspirational/ Linkedin https://www.linkedin.com/in/jasonjwright/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/intinspodcast/ Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCimr3WepHAUcJr-n9m9k4IA   Leaders are Readers, here are some free books for you to get. Free copy of Think and Grow Rich http://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook   The 14-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge, Let’s Grow and Give with a goal of feeding 40,000 people through Feeding America. https://www.sean-osborn.com/14daychallenge   Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Until next week, remember to always be thinking big

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today we have such a special guest with Dr. Debi Silber and we are going to talk about Post Betrayal Transformation. I wanted to bring Dr. Debi on the show because betrayal doesn’t have to be some huge event, we have betrayal in our everyday life, at work, at home, in our social areas and it can eat at us if we don’t deal with it. Her doctoral study led to 3 discoveries around how we experience and heal from betrayal. Based on her findings, along with 28 years of health, mindset and lifestyle coaching, she's created a proven approach to help people heal (physically, mentally and emotionally) from the betrayal of a family member/partner/friend/coworker/self.  Dr. Debi Silber, is the founder of The PBT Institute, is a holistic psychologist, a health, mindset, and personal development expert. She's an award-winning speaker, coach and author of the Amazon #1 Bestselling book: The Unshakable Woman and The Unshakable Woman -The Workbook, 2 books recommended by Brian Tracy, Marshall Goldsmith and Jack Canfield,  Dr. Debi has contributed to FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz show, TEDx (twice), The Thinking Big Podcast :) , The Huffington Post, Shape, Self, Health, Working Mother, Forbes, Psychology Today, WebMD, Ladies Home Journal, Woman's World and Glamour, amongst others.  I love it when people bring their passion into their careers, when they turn a huge life event in their life into something that can help so many other people. Today we are going to think big physically, mentaly and emotionally. Connect with Dr. Debi Silber at the following social media links: Website https://thepbtinstitute.com/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/InspireEmpowerTransform/ Linkedin https://www.linkedin.com/in/debisilber Twitter https://twitter.com/debisilber Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClpiRrwk1mPjMYEEcn42Bdg/featured TEDx https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XX30i6nC7ro   Leaders are Readers, here are some free books for you to get. Free copy of Think and Grow Rich - http://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook The 7-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge - https://bit.ly/tagrchallenge Free Audibles book - http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible   Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website - http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/   Until next week, remember always be thinking big Ratings and reviews directly impact search rankings for the Thinking Big Podcast. So please help us get more ratings and reviews.   Podcast Transcription: Welcome to the thinking big podcast. Today, we have such a special guest with Dr. Debbie Silber, and we're going to talk about post betrayal transformation. And I wanted to bring Debbie on the show because betrayal doesn't have to be some huge event. You know, we have betrayal in our everyday life at work at home, and it can absolutely eat us up if we don't deal with it. And Debbie is the founder of the post betrayal transformation Institute. She is a holistic psychologist, a health mindset and personal development expert. Oh my god. She is an award winning speaker coach. She's the author of Amazon number one bestseller book The unshakable woman and unshakable women workbook. Both books by the way, recommended by Brian Tracy and jack Canfield. Debbie has also contributed to such things as Fox, CBS, the dr. oz show Ted x twice, and now the thinking big podcast. Anyways, I wish I could just come up with some great little saying for what she does, but jack Canfield, I must steal his because he's just much better at that than I am. Dr. Debbie Silber has the ability to blend knowledge, expertise, enthusiasm, and compassion to help people create the body lifestyle and life they crave. Oh, that's not to say I could not I could not come up with that. So today we're going to be thinking big physically, mentally, and emotionally. 1:33 Welcome to the thinking big podcast with Sean Osborne. The show helping you think bigger into your life and potential. Shaun believes by equipping you with the tools, strategies and philosophies required to be successful in all aspects of your life you can achieve anything you believe in empowering our own growth makes a deeply positive and lasting impact on our lives, community and our world. 1:56 Now, here's Shawn, it is absolutely fantastic. having you on the on the podcast, Debbie, tell us a little bit about what you're doing. 2:06 Mm hmm. Well, what I'm doing is helping people heal from betrayal. Physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, you know, you don't, you don't jump into something like that, of course, unless you need to. And I've been in business since 1991. It started with health and then mindset and personal development and then my own traumas. And after two horrible betrayals, it catapulted me into a PhD program in transpersonal, psychology, the psychology of transformation and human potential. While it was there, I did a study, I studied betrayal, what holds us back what helps us heal and what happens to us when the people closest to us lie, cheat and deceive. Right. And that study led to three groundbreaking discoveries and led to a whole new business, family, marriage life, all of it. 2:54 That is that is absolutely amazing that you've gone through that net, you've done that. Now you said something about, you initially went in for human potential, that's part of what you went into, to me that that is something that is so so either not overlooked, or not many people actually, as a society, we don't look, I think as much into the mind and human potential and any of this of the betrayal, anything that happens, anything that happens within the mind. Now, do you think that this stuff that is going on now. And as we get longer into this, this COVID stuff? How do you think that's going to affect what you do? Like, your, I don't wanna say your clients, but how do you think that's gonna affect society? That's going to need this type of help. Do you think it's going to increase? I think it's, mentally we're going through one of the most challenging times I think we have, 3:54 Oh, absolutely. You know, I what I'm seeing is the best and the worst in all of us. Having this time, this extra time that we normally don't have, we do a few things with it, we either numb avoid, distract as desperately as we can. Because we're so unwilling to feel or face right. Or we take that time, and we look within and and with many of us where we're shocked at what we find, but that's how transformation happens. Yeah, so it's typically one of the two you know, it's interesting, I did two TEDx is and my first one was exactly on how we do that we numb avoid, distract. We use food, drugs, alcohol, work, TV, keeping busy reckless behavior, because what used to work doesn't work anymore. What used to feel good, doesn't feel good anymore. What used to make sense doesn't make sense anymore. So we, we think we like change middle age. So we do all those things. So we don't have to look at it. But you know, we get that tap on the shoulder. And we just keep numbing and avoiding the stakes get bigger and bigger until we're forced To look 5:00 Yeah. And self sabotage I, I do that all the time. And I do it subconsciously, I don't even realize that I'm sabotaging myself. This is that little inner, a little inner voice that kicks in that we don't even when we don't even see it that that really starts sabotaging what we do. Oh, absolutely, yeah, it's like that negative negative talk, though you can't do that, or Who do you think you are? You know. 5:27 And it's so interesting because it's, it's almost, we use that as a safety mechanism. You know, because it keeps us we think safe, but it keeps us stuck. It keeps us small. Because if we were to actually combat that voice, and challenge it and take it on, we would shake up everyone around us, we check ourselves. So instead, you know, it may seem easier, just to quiet that voice as best we can. But you know, I use this example a lot. And it's, let's say there's a, let's just take a boy, and let's say he has his favorite stereotypical blue shirt. He outgrows the blue shirt, the blue shirt doesn't become bad. He's just outgrown it. And that's what happens with us. Where we're ready for something new, we're ready to play a much bigger game. And we're using those things because it's it's we're venturing into new and unfamiliar territory, 6:25 right. Yeah, that that that is a great way to look at it. That is that that is now on front. So from a betrayal standpoint, how does? How does betrayal affect this? Do you think? I mean, how does it How does it feel? What is it? Because I've gone through that, but I don't think too, near the magnitude that some people have. 6:45 Yeah, you know, the way it works is, the more you trust it, the more you depended on that person, the bigger the betrayal. So for example, a child who's completely dependent on their parent, let's say that parent is something awful, that's going to have a greater impact than let's say your coworker taking credit for your idea, right? It's still a betrayal, but not to the same level. And the, you know, what happens is the more time, the more trust, the more heart, the more sacrifice, you know, the bigger the bigger the betrayal and and one of the ones I had been through it was my family. And you know how the universe works. If you don't quite learn the lesson, you're meant to learn to get more opportunities? Well, I did. And the next one was my husband. I mean, anybody who's been through it, blindsided is the word we use, because you never see this coming. You know, this is the person that you trusted the most. So So really, we look at it, we say, if the person we trusted the most proves untrustworthy, who do we trust? If the ones we'd run to when other people are causing the harm? are the ones causing the harm? Where do we go? And it's such a shock to the body in mind. And it hits us on every level physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually. So different types of betrayals hit us in different ways. But I'm convinced it's one of the most painful of the human experiences, 8:08 I think, I think it is because it does it entails our beliefs entails our core of who we are. 8:18 You know, what, one of the discoveries in the study that I did, we made three discoveries, which was just and I'm happy to get into each one. But one of them was that there is this complete and total shattering of our worldview, a worldview is our mental model. That's how we view the world. This is safe, these are the rules, this is how it works. And a betrayal is enough to shatter all of those rules in an instant. So think about it. Now all of a sudden, you had your rules that were governing you, you thought you knew who was safe, who wasn't how the how the world works. And in a in one shockingly painful moment, everything you thought was real and true, is no longer. Yeah, and the entire self is destroyed. You know, originally, I was studying something called post traumatic growth, which is like the upside of trauma, how trauma leaves you with this new awareness perspective inside that you didn't have. Right, right. But I I thought about it. And I said, you know, I've been through death of a loved one. I've been through disease. I was in ICU for 11 days. And betrayal was so different. So I asked my study participants and I said, If betrayal is different, you know, if that if you've been through any other traumas, can you compare it to betrayal? And does it feel different for you? Hands down unanimously, everyone said, Oh, my gosh, it's so different. And it's because betrayal feel so intentional. We take it so personally. So the whole self has to be rebuilt, rejection, abandonment, competence, worthiness, belonging, trust, they all have to be rebuilt. So it needed its own name. It didn't quite make sense to call it post traumatic growth. So I coined a new term post betrayal transformation. Do you 9:55 think that part of it is is how we view it or how We look at it as part of the betrayal. Because Because if I'm looking out, there's some things that could happen to me. And I would say, that's just the way it is. I'm not the answer. But that same thing can happen to someone else. And the world is falling apart. So how do we is there? Is there something in that whole mechanism or that whole thing that is based on how we how we see things, how we look at the world, how we how we see those? 10:29 Absolutely. And it really is, my definition of it is, it's the breaking of a spoken or unspoken rule. You know, in every relationship has rules. I mean, think about it, we sort of had a rule that I was going to meet with you today we were going to have a conversation. And if I didn't show up on some level, I would have betrayed you. You wouldn't have been devastated. Right. But on some level, that's a breaking of that rule of breaking of that trust. So there are those micro betrayals, those death by 1000. cuts, betrayals, and then there are those huge ones that just absolutely knock us down, knock us out. 11:07 yet. So I'm also interested in in your TED Talks, I watched, watch one of them. But what was it like to get up there? See, I'm always the one I always I mean, I love what you do. And we're gonna get into that. And but I'm also like, how do they do something? How does it feel? You know, what's the when you got up on stage? The first time for TEDx? How was that? You know, 11:30 I'll tell you, I don't know which one you saw. But I did two, the one on sabotage was the first one. The second one was do you have post betrayal syndrome. But that first one was six weeks after my betrayal. I don't even know how I was able to do that. But it's so interesting, because that talk got a got a lot of views, I think, I don't know, 730 thousand or something like that. And it's interesting, because I think people felt and they sensed they sense, something's brewing there. Right transformation was underway, I wasn't quite sure what it was going to look like yet. And I wasn't ready to talk about my betrayal. You know, I remember Dr. Joe dispenza, said, I think it was something like wisdom is experienced without the pain. And I was in way too much pain. So I wasn't coming from that place of wisdom just yet. And I wasn't ready to share it. And it's interesting, because by the time I did the second one, you know, any good coach as a coach, right? And I'll never forget, we were in a zoom call with my coaching group, and everyone's talking, you know, the big everybody's in their little zoom boxes, and what's going on with you what's going on with you what's going on with you. And I was talking about this study, and I was so proud of the study in this study, the study, and my coach just stops be dead in my tracks. And he said, Stop hiding behind your ethics study already. 12:49 Oh, 12:51 it was time to go bigger, go home. And it was terrifying. I mean, it was, you know, it's a very vulnerable topic. Yes, stuff that gossip thrives on. But, uh, you know, I really made peace with it, saying that I see the transformation here with, you know, with what I was doing with clients privately. And if I can do that privately, because they see what I'm doing with what this discovery showed, and I'm implementing it and it's working. How do I keep it to myself? So all right, George was gonna come but and 13:24 Yeah, well, that and that's why I asked that. I saw that and that's when I watched but there were I saw something in there. I saw there was there was passion there was I saw something, something there. Yeah, absolutely. So can you can you kind of see sabotages like I know when it if I'm walking down the street, and I see someone that's in a bad mood, or someone that's just that just not doing over? I can tell before they even get to me that you know, their heads down their shoulders. You can tell when someone's not doing great you know, you you never see someone walk around going. I'm doing fantastic. So can you kind of from a physical side, what is it what is you know, this betrayal? To me, God, it's gonna be just so crushing. What does it do to you physically? 14:15 You know, I'll give you the typical profile of the men and women we see who walk through our doors every single day, right? Let's call her so. Before she says a word. You can feel her stress. Her anxiety, her said is her pain. It's palpable. She can't sleep. So she's taking something to help her get to sleep. She's exhausted. So she's using sugar and caffeine for energy. Because of that she's putting on weight particularly around her midsection. She's so anxious, she can't focus. So she goes to her doctor who prescribes mood stabilizers or anti anxiety meds to help her get through her day. Or she's just drinking on her own eating anything to numb avoid, distract. She's her nerves are frazzled, she's on edge. So how is she supposed to manage her day raise her kids go about her business, her world just collapsed. And not only that she's ignited the stress response. So now she's also headed for every single symptom illness condition, disease. And, you know, there is this, that was one of the other discoveries, there's this collection of symptoms, so common to betrayal, it's known as post betrayal syndrome. I mean, it, it almost leaves nothing untouched. And so imagine you're walking around in that state in the state of anger, sadness, rage, confusion, exhaustion, you know, physically all of these symptoms, and, and you're supposed to put your life back together, you know, so it's an easy way to see why someone would choose who drugs, alcohol, you know, whatever, right. But what we see is in the five stages of betrayal, which is that was the third discovery, there are five stages. That's a typical stage three, and that's where people stop, and they resign themselves to thinking, Oh, this is as good as it's gonna get, I might miss, we'll just find a way to make this work. So they're not happy with their bodies, with their health, their level of relationships with their income, you know, with their work, but they think that's as good as it's getting. 16:20 And all the time. And over time, how does that? Because I see people that I would imagine, have gone through that. I know that they're stressed, for some reason, whether it's from, you know, betrayal, or some sort of mental, you know, happening, that after years, it's, you can tell that, and do you find that the longer that people are in this betrayal, or in this area, the harder it is for them to get out? 16:52 Absolutely. Because what happens is they start receiving all of these small self benefits from staying there, think about it, they get to be right, they get someone to blame. They get a target for their anger. They don't have to do the hard work of trusting and learning to trust again, do I trust you to just your effort? Yeah, they won't trust anybody. Right, they get to justify inaction. They get sympathy from other people. I mean, these are all small self benefits, right? But they serve them. And then what happens is, the longer they stay there, now like energy attracts like energy. So now they're calling situations, circumstances, opportunities that confirm that's where they belong. So now the mind starts thinking, well, maybe I deserve it. Maybe I'm not all that. Maybe they maybe maybe maybe, right, and they're rooted. 17:36 And when your mind starts thinking, that's the way you are, that's what you're gonna get. And that's good or bad. It works both ways. But good or bad. Now, you talked about kind of the holistic side, I'm of the mindset that I don't want any drugs from, from drug companies. To me, it's, I think we have lost our way over, over centuries. I don't know if, over a long time, we've had the cures to almost everything that we have way back from plants from, from food from the things that we have. And over time, we've, we've either forgot, or we've got brainwashed to, hey, you need this pill to do this. Your stuff is all holistic stuff. And how do you see holistic stuff coming into this type of an environment kind of a clinical To me it's kind of a clinical environment where generally you would see people try to get you on uppers, downers, whatever they call them, to to try stabilizing your your mind, 18:44 is such a great question. Here's one thing, I noticed, there were three groups in the study who did not heal. Now as the researcher, I assumed you're not supposed to assume anything. As a researcher, I was new with this, you know, doing my best. And I assumed that the people who were the hardest hit would grow the least, because they had the most to overcome. I was dead wrong. That had nothing to do with it at all. It was the ones who were willing to face it, feel it heal, it blew past the ones who were medicating because they didn't deal with it. I mean, yes, it may have made it a bit easier to get through their day. But that was it. It did not contribute to the healing. Now, as far as you know, what, what we offer within our community. It is holistic based, but there's there's such a variety. I mean, even one thing we have is a three phase supplement line, just to offer some additional support for sleep, for clarity for nerves for gut health. I mean, you're one of the things that typically happens in betrayal, your gut is erect. What's so interesting about that too, is you know, when you think about it, look what your gut does, it absorbs processes and digests, right your food now isn't it difficult to absorb digest and process betrayal. Like, is there any wonder why your gut would be so jacked up during a betrayal? So everything we're approaching this with, because you can't just go for talk therapy? I mean, it's only a piece of it, there's so much more. But you know, when you when you medicate may make the day a bit easier, but that betrayal is not going anywhere. Right? 20:24 Yeah. What's what do you think? What is the the biggest, biggest difference in can they be treated the same? Like just post traumatic? You know, trauma or or betrayal trauma? Is? Is there a difference in in power? How different betray are different traumatic experiences affect what we do? 20:45 Absolutely. And that's why when I was originally setting post traumatic growth, betrayal just kind of didn't qualify. Because let's say you lose, you lose someone you love, like I lost my mom, right? You don't question the love? You don't you know, that stays intact. Betrayal has you questioning everything, even your very sanity? Right? Because it's it's the sort of thing where, let's say, you know, or even something like I had one participant who lost everything in the house fire, you know, you you mourn the loss of your home and your belongings, but it's not a rejection to the self. Right? Well, you know, the whole thing about betrayal is the impact to the self. And that's why if I had to come up with a formula, it would be, it would be post traumatic growth, right? The healing after trauma, plus rebuilding the self completely and fully equals post betrayal transformation. Because you can't fully heal unless you rebuild that trust. You know, how you relate to other people again, you know, so are we here's the thing, too, we see betrayal impacting every single area of our lives. And we've all heard Time heals all wounds, I have the proof that that's not true. We've had over 8000 people to this point, take the post betrayal syndrome quiz to see to what extent they're struggling people. And there's a question that reads Is there anything else you'd like to share? I read every single one of them. And people write things like my betrayal happened 40 years ago, I can feel the hate. My betrayal happened 30 years ago, I'm unwilling to trust again, my betrayal happened 15 years ago, I feel gutted. Now we know if you're walking around feeling that way. You're not venturing, you know, back out there to pursue other relationships. It's affecting your work, it's affecting your health. And specifically, we see it like this. With relationships, I see it in two ways. We put the big wall up, you know, oh, I'm not letting anybody close to my heart again, or the faces change. But it's the same thing. Because that profound lesson has yet to be learned. Yeah, we see, you know, or we see it in health, someone goes to the most well meaning doctors, coaches, healers, therapists to manage a stress related issue or disorder, at the root of it, is an unhealed betrayal. And we see it in business. Someone wants to be a team player, but they're terrified. The person they trusted, the most proved untrustworthy, how can they trust that boss or co worker, or they want to ask for that raise or promotion, but their confidence was shattered, right? So they don't have the confidence to ask if they're bitter, resentful instead, 23:20 that is a lot broader than I, I was thinking, I mean, it's, boy, you betrayal is everywhere. And that's the thing, it's like, when it gets to your core, when it gets to your beliefs of who you are. And something is damaged are taken away from that, believe it that is much bigger than just a post traumatic where something happens, and hey, I gotta get it, you know, I gotta get over that it's, you know, shit happens. But, you know, we've got to move on. But this is this is at the root, this is at the core of, of what we what we are. And when someone takes out one of our pillars of belief, boy, that that is a huge thing. Now something if someone's from the outside, so if we've got listeners on here that, you know, maybe they're not going through something like this right now, but how can we as humans, as you know, wives, as husbands, as you know, parents as grandparents, how can we look and see signs of betrayal or signs of somebody so we can help other bit, ourselves included, but But what are the things that we can look at to help our loved ones because I've got loved ones that I know are in a place where they've been betrayed. And, you know, it's, I can see it, if you don't take care of it, it does not go away. There's they're they're still dealing with stuff. It might be in different ways. Like they might have changed vices, but they're still going down that same path, whether one time it was you know, drugs or alcohol now it's food, but they're still and I can still see the biases being being done just differently, you know, how can we? 25:04 How can we help people that we love? 25:07 And well, you can let them know they're stuck in a classic stage three, but they're not going to know what you're talking about the five stages of betrayal, that's exactly where they are. You know, the first thing is awareness. You can't change anything you're not aware of, right? It's interesting, because someone interviewed me a couple weeks ago, and he said, Well, you know, Debbie, I really haven't been betrayed. I'm like, that's fine. Not everybody has. And we start talking about it. And he says, Oh, my gosh, because you know, it's really interesting. When I was little, my brother used to always take my toys, and he used to always break them. And I remember getting this amazing toy. And he said, Can I play with it? And I said, No. I said, No, because you're going to break and he's like, No, no, I really won't. He's fine. and takes it two seconds later, he breaks the toy. He goes, you know, I'm 36. And I'll let anybody touch my stuff. That's the only real betrayal, right? That's what I see. How are you acting? Where's that coming from? Where's it coming from? What's the fear behind it? What's the reason behind it? Because you'll know, I mean, I even even when someone is numbing, avoiding distracting, so often, an unhealed betrayal is at the root of that. So you just want to get really, really clear. And I actually have four questions that I'm happy to share to see if someone's actually doing that. Absolutely. 26:19 Absolutely. And they're gonna be in the show notes too, by the way, so But absolutely, 26:23 great. Okay, so the first one is, am I numbing, avoiding distracting? if so how? Be honest with yourself? Do you come home at the end of the day, and the first thing you do is put on the TV to desperately drown out the sound of your own thoughts? Do you go into the kitchen, open up the cabinets, because you have to stop stuff yourself to stuff that voice? Right? Second question. Here's the big one. What am I pretending not to see? Very my pretending not to see there's trouble in my relationship. My pretending not to see I hate my job. My pretending not to see that health issue that needs my attention. The third question, What's life going to look like in five to 10 years, if I keep this going? Play it out, play it all the way out. Take that health health issue out five to 10 years, what's gonna look like, take that work? issue? Five to 10 years play it out? What's that gonna look like? And the relationship issue, ignore that relationship issue? Five to 10 years? What's it gonna look like? And the last question, what could life look like if I changed now? Now, I'm not saying that's easy. But transformation happens when you tell yourself the truth. 27:33 You know, and until you until you are have complete clarity, you're for other stuff. I mean, besides this until you have clarity in whatever it is you're doing, you will not have come to a direct answer. You will not 27:49 it You're so right. And we avoid it. We wonder why isn't life working for us? You know, I'll give you an analogy. It just makes this so clear. Everybody has what most people have a messy room, you know, drawer garage in their home right? Now think about think about what you do, you do everything you can to avoid it. You just don't like it because it doesn't feel good. And when you have to go, you just go as quickly as you can grab what you need, and you leave, right. But then think about what happens. There's that one day where you're like, that's it. I'm going in, you know, and you grab your garbage bags, and you roll up your sleeves, and you and you dive in Now think about what happens. At first, it looks worse, it looks worse. Because now you have your stuff all over the place. You're like, I'll donate this, I'll toss that I'll fix this, right? And it's all over. And then you put the stuff in the car, you're going to fix and you donate and you get whatever. And now you have your pile left of things that you're going to keep. And you get your fancy little boxes and you know, containers and you put it back. Now think about what happens. Now, you stand back with pride. You feel awesome. You like look at me, right? You actually want to open your garage doors show to everybody. But that's earned. It was only because you went in and did the work. That's what happens. You cannot feel that sense of empowerment of pride of accomplishment. When you're numbing, avoiding distracting you know, I don't know about you. But when I was a kid, if someone said something that you didn't want to hear, you'd stick your fingers in your ear and be like, lalalala I don't hear you, right. When we grow up. We use food, drugs, alcohol, all that stuff. It's the adult version of that same game. 29:25 Yeah. Yeah. Now you mentioned kid now, I'm of the belief that we get pretty well programmed in our beliefs and everything. By the time were, you know, eight or nine years old. I think we're you know, pretty well programmed. What is the effect of betrayal? at a younger age before we've got all those beliefs in place, like if we're six or five or six and we get betrayed by a parent or or a family member. I'm just thinking No, you all the stuff you're saying it's like, is that even more traumatic? To someone to get their beliefs taken, betrayed at that age, 30:06 you're, you're not starting at the starting line, like everybody else. It's a harder road. Now, that's not to say you cannot catch up and blow the doors past everybody, but you'd have a bit more work to do. Right? 30:18 And I think with what's, so I'm worried about, you know, everything. We're all quarantine, we're all you know, this is all through the pandemic is. Are you seeing a lot more of this happening just because everyone is so close? I again, as I said, I think the mental side of this is going to be worse than the pandemic itself. I think the the after effects are going to be 30:44 it's Yeah, it's very challenging, because think about it. I mean, there are so many people who are quarantined with their betrayer. I mean, if that's not torture, right there, yeah. So, you know, what's that, like, and then there's, you know, there are financial issues. So as if the betrayal, you know, wasn't bad enough, now, they're dealing with that on top of it. So it's, it's confronting everyone, with their deepest, darkest demons, right. And betrayal is one of those things, that it absolutely shatters your heart, your mind. Everything has to be completely and totally rebuilt. So if you don't have the bandwidth, because you're just struggling in so many other areas, if your nerves are frayed, because like, now, you lost your job. Now your kids can't go to school. Now you're, you know, you're all over the place. It's that much harder. I mean, I have four kids. And I mean, thank goodness, they're older, but but I feel it for the parents who they're not sure if their kids are going to go back to school. I mean, like, I could never homeschool my kids, they'd be in deeper trouble with that. I haven't been able to do their math since like second grade. 31:56 Yeah, that's gonna be challenging for for many, many people. So for the listeners, what is the best way? Or, you know, what can someone do? If they if they see this in themselves? If they see it in a loved one, what is the best way for them to contact you? 32:13 Yeah, the best thing to do is is for them to take the post betrayal syndrome quiz. And I'll be honest, it's a little it's a little jarring, because what you're doing is I mean, I'm having I'm having them respond to every single symptom that they may be struggling with that they may have said, Oh, well, it's aging, you know, it's because I'm older, it's because of No, it's not because of your betrayal. And when they see the physical symptoms, the mental the emotional symptoms, and then they see how it's affecting their ability to trust, how it's affecting how they move forward, how it's affecting their relationships. I mean, then it's in plain sight. And then from that point, you know, people who say, oh, I'll do anything to heal. No, they won't. No, they won't. If I tell you how many people say, you know, I mean, ask them on a level of, you know, one to 10. How is important? You really, I don't think anybody gives me less than a 10. And a fraction of them take that step to move forward. Because it's scary. Yeah, I get it. We gotcha. But I but I get how scary it is. 33:11 Any changes is getting out of our comfort zone at all, is it but but dealing with something that we don't want to deal with is a tough thing to do. 33:21 And also, it's because there's a really good likelihood that when we heal, we're going to outgrow that person. If I tell you how many times someone says, Oh, can we just make it that we're, we're good again, I said, That's not my work here. My work is to get you to your physical, mental, emotional, Best place. And now this person has two choices. This person could say, Holy smokes, I better step up my game to meet the power of where this person is. Or they say, you know, like, you get this going on. They're like, ooh, what happened to you? It's like, Ooh, I'm not the least bit interested in you. Yeah. But my job is to get someone here. That's it. And usually what happens is, this happens, or that happens. 34:03 Yeah. And I think that holds a lot of people back that not wanting to get what they want to fix themselves, or they want to get better and physically, mentally, if they even subconsciously, think they're going to lose that other half. That's not going to grow with them. I see that in other areas Besides this, but yeah, that that is, that's the big hold up for many, many people. 34:29 It's, it's so huge, you know, when I gave this, you can see I'm big on the analogies I gave this analogy in the second TEDx. And this was about the analogy of I use the example of a house. And here's the difference between resilience and trauma and transformation. Resilience is bringing back restoring you need that for your every day. trauma and transformation is different. So let's take a house that needs a new boiler and you get a boiler that would be resilience, or let's say it needs a new roof. You get a roof that's resilient. You restoring it. Here's trauma and transformation. A tornado comes by levels your house, like a new boilers not gonna fix it, and new roofs not gonna fix it right? Neither of those things won't fix it. Now, here's the thing, you have every right to stand there at the lot where your house once stood and say, This is the most horrible thing that's ever happened. And you'd be 100%, right? And you can call your friends over and say, Look at this, isn't this the worst thing you've ever seen, and they all agree, and you don't have to do anything, but cry and kick and scream and mourn the loss of your house until your last breath. However, if you choose to rebuild your house, you don't have to, but if you choose to, there's nothing there. Why would you build the same house? Right? That's what trauma allows you to and with betrayal, rebuilding is always a choice, whether you rebuild yourself and move on. And that's what I did with my family. Rebuilding wasn't an option with them. Or if the situation lends itself if you're willing, and if you want to, you rebuild something entirely new with the person who hurt you. And that's what I what I do with my husband. You know, it's two totally different people. We married each other again, you know, not always an option. Yeah. 36:13 Yeah. It's funny, you mentioned that I actually have a friend that their house burned down. And they built the exact same deck. Down the identical house. Wow. That was like, there's not one thing you didn't like about your old house, you you built this same damn thing. 36:32 Well, but if that's what works, that's what works. But but but I'll tell you, one of the biggest reasons why people don't heal from betrayal is they're afraid of that transformation. Like after my betrayal, I was going to heal regardless having no expectation of what was going to show up. And that's when transformation can happen. It's when you're only committed to will only patch it up. And I'll tell you, the group that was that didn't heal and was also by far the most sick was the one where the betrayer had no consequences. Where they tried to turn the other cheek. They tried to look past they tried to just move forward, you tell that to your broken heart. You know, not only did that not work, it only made them sick. Yeah. But it's scary to say, Okay, now it's about me healing, and I have no idea what's gonna show up. 37:21 Yeah. No, do you do like group type coaching with people? You know, 37:27 we opened the it's called the PBT, post betrayal transformation Institute membership community, because what what I found was really what the only thing that it seems people do is they medicate, or they see a therapist that their insurance provides, you know, maybe they're good or bad at this, I you know, sometimes they're not skilled in it, and it does more harm than good. Or they're in some type of support group that just, you know, bashes the betrayer. And that doesn't help. And my study proved exactly what we need to heal. So what the membership community is, is what the study proved, you know, and along with what the 8000 people who've taken the quiz, say they want what worked for me along with, you know, my clients, and we put it into a beautiful membership community. That's been, and I know, for me, 38:22 and there's probably going to be a lot of listeners that that are saying, as well, my betrayal is just not that bad. You don't have to have something that is completely debilitating. I can't even get out of bed to go and work on this stuff. It doesn't have it. But a lot of people have that. Well, it's just not that bad yet. Oh, I'll wait until it's until you know, until I absolutely have to go get and talk with people and get things. It doesn't have to be that bad. 38:51 Well, you know, what I see there are two people who come our way. There's the person who's been blindsided, and they're in crisis. But then there's that other person who is in that classic stage three, where they've resigned themselves to thinking this is as good as it gets. But meanwhile, like I said, their weight, you know, they're not happy with their body, they don't feel good in their own skin. They're not happy with their work, their finances, any of it and it shows up in every area of life. Think about it just in business. If you're not happy with your body, or you don't have the energy, you need just those two things. And let's say you're an entrepreneur, now, how are you showing up on video? How are you promoting yourself? Yeah, right. That's directly impacting your finances. Yeah. Or if it's affecting your confidence, your confidence was shattered, how is that affecting who you network with, who you collaborate, if you don't trust? How you collaborating with anybody, so it affects everything. So it doesn't necessarily have to be that it was the most, you know, extreme trauma, where you're you're you're curled up in a fetal position. But if it's holding you back at all, check how you are in your business, in your relationships in your health. Yeah, and there's an unhealed betrayal at the root of it. That's a choice. I mean, you're looking at the person who did the study. It's proven. We know what it takes to heal.

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today we are talking with Tim Ringgold, who I call the relaxation Ninja because he can do stuff with music and you never see it coming. You will look at, and FEEL music in a different way after hearing Tim and the work he does. Tim is the Owner of Sonic Divinity Music Therapy Services and author of Sonic Recovery Tim has given over 80 talks nationally and internationally on the subject, including the very first TEDx talk on music therapy, and has shared the stage with top thought leaders and researchers on how music affects the brain. Tim’s mission is to empower people to reach for music when they are facing stress in work or life, rather than harmful substances or digital distractions and he spent the past 11 years in hospitals and treatment centers helping people to reduce pain and relieve stress.  Today we are going to think big and “go all ninja” on the benefits of music for stress and relaxation. Connect with Tim Ringgold at the following social media link: Website FaceBook Linkedin Instagram  Podcast - Reduce your Stress with Tim Ringgold Take the Relaxation Vacationhttps://www.timringgold.com/ Leaders are Readers and here are a few free books for you. Free copy of Think and Grow Rich http://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook The 7-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge https://bit.ly/tagrchallenge Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today we are talking with Dr Lynette Reed about the Layers of Success for Your team or Organization. Lynette’s mission is to help people and organizations feel more connected to the world around them and the relationships that are most important to them.  I remember 25+ years ago when I started managing people, it was definitely a top down management style.  Lynette understands the modern work world is recreating itself into a place where creativity, teamwork, and human value are being brought to the forefront.   And that employees are looking for leaders to create an environment that promotes trust, and openness.  Today we are going to think big into our connections and leadership. Connect with Dr. Lynette Reed at the following social media link:Website https://www.expectations2reality.com/ Linkedin https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-lynette-reed-1b91051b/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/expectareality/?hl=en Podcast Five Minutes With Dr. Lynette Reed Leaders are Readers, and the show notes are packed with free books for you to get. Free copy of Think and Grow Richhttp://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook The 7-day Think and Grow Rich Challengehttps://bit.ly/tagrchallenge Free Audibles bookhttp://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching Website http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/

Welcome to the Thinking Big Podcast. Today we are talking with Ryan Lockee about his new book Wisdom Beyond the Classroom. Today is going to be a great show because I love it when people bring their passion into their careers. When they see something and use their imagination so they can help others, and grow them self. As someone that taught in school for a number of years, Ryan feels that personal development for all people, especially our young people, is vitally important and needs more attention and guidance. This includes the topics of meditation and mindfulness, managing our emotions, giving ourselves better self-care and love, asking ourselves empowering questions, choosing thoughts that serve us, and having a growth mindset. I believe that when this happens, our society will take a giant step forward. Today we are going to think big into our children's, grand children’s, and our own personal growth.. About Ryan Lockee: Ryan is an avid learner and meditator, with great interest in the happiness, fulfillment, health, and development of us as individuals and as a society. He believes that with the right mindset, anything is possible. Ryan has been a high school baseball coach, a 4th and 6th-grade teacher in San Francisco, California, and taught English in Seoul, South Korea. He grew up as the oldest of six kids in Omaha, Nebraska, and currently lives with his wife and newborn son in San Francisco, California. Connect with Ryan Lockee at the following social media link: https://www.wisdombeyondtheclassroom.com/ https://www.facebook.com/ryan.lockee https://www.instagram.com/ryan.lockee/ Leaders are Readers, and the show notes are packed with free books for you to get. Free copy of Think and Grow Rich http://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook The 7-day Think and Grow Rich Challenge https://bit.ly/tagrchallenge Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/

Today we are talking with Tugce Ozdeger about Heart Centric Tech I love it when people bring their passion into their careers. When they see something and use their imagination so they can help others, and grow themself. Tugce is an experienced Software Engineer working in the banking and defense industries, she is now known for shifting the mindset of other software engineers and helping them to gain a new perspective in tech. She holds Master's degree in Computer Science from Uppsala University in Sweden. She graduated from Athlone Institute of Technology and Bilkent University as a honor student in Ireland and Turkey. I believe that no matter what field you are in, personal development is the key to having a great career Tugce noticed through her own development the need for mentoring other technology people and started her Heart Centered tech mentoring. Today we are going to thinking big into the mindset. Connect with Tugce Ozdeger at the following social media link: https://www.heartcentrictech.com https://www.facebook.com/tugceozdeger https://instagram.com/heartcentrictech Leaders are readers, and here are some links to some free books for you to get. Free copy of Think and Grow Rich http://bit.ly/free-think-and-grow-rich-ebook Free Audibles book http://bit.ly/thinkingbigaudible Connect with Sean Osborn at Thinking Big Coaching http://www.thinkingbigcoaching.com https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/ https://www.facebook.com/thinkingbigcoaching/