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Empowered Through Compassion: EMDR and IFS Informed Therapy

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Mar 30, 2024 • 45min

Compassion Through The Media: Eli Holzman

Season 2, Episode 24, Release Date: 3-29-2024 Compassion Through The Media   Welcome to this episode, where I was able to have a "Compassionate Conversation" with a childhood friend of mine: Eli Holzman. Eli is the CEO of The Intellectual Property Corporation, which he founded in 2016. Eli is President of Sony Pictures Television, Nonfiction. I wanted to speak with Eli about therapy, and how it is represented in the media, because Eli knows media! He is a writer and executive producer who has won numerous Primetime Emmy Awards, Critic Choice Real TV Awards, and also MTV and TV Awards.  He has over 75 shows that he has been the Executive Produce on, which include Undercover Boss, Project Runway, Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath, Free Meek, American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance.   We spoke about Project Runway, and how Eli filmed this at Parsons: The New School for Deign, and positive power that the show had to influence people. Eli said, "On the show something special happened. Contestants started helping each other, they weren't cut throat. They were kind."   Eli shared that as he was building his first company he was creating Undercover Boss. "This helped me define my values." Eli shared how some of his employers led by fear, but he wanted to find another ways to lead! He recognized on Undercover Boss that "humans crave esteem as much as water and air. Just seeing someone receive this can touch us."   Eli spoke about the current crisis in television. "Our tastes have become so broad, and there are so many options out there now."    I wanted to know, what would a counseling reality show look like? We spoke about "Couple's Counseling" as one option. Eli spoke about some of the challenges of a counseling reality show. (a) people like stories were there are big changes, and drama. Counseling could be slow and incremental. (b) the topics that are covered could be very specific to the people involved. (c) TV and media are going to represent a small percetage of the population that have the personality and skills to capture the interest of an audience.   Eli said he feels it could be very helpful to explore how we can monitor our bodies, and how this information can lead us to making better decisions. He also feels that it could be interesting and important to understand more about inter-generational legacies and how these are passed down and impact us.   Eli spke about how our mental health is manipulated on a regular basis, perhap more than any other time in history. This is done by the computers that we carry around in our pockets (our smart phones). This technology is engineered to capture our attention, and is very deliberate. We are in a time in history where these devices in our pocket also hold all of the solutions to our problems-- all the answers to our mental and emotional health are within our reach, if we know how to search for them. 
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Mar 23, 2024 • 44min

Compassion Through Spirituality: Frank Rogers Jr

Season 2, Episode 23,    Release Date: 3-19-2024 Empathy Through Connection Frank Rogers Jr., PhD, is professor of Spiritual Formation and Narrative Pedagogy. He is a spiritual director, speaker, retreat leader and author. His books include, “Practicing Compassion,” and “Compassion in Practice: The Way of Jesus,” as well the fiction work, “The God of Shattered Glass.” He is the cofounder of the Center for Engaged Compassion. Find out more about Frank Rogers Jr. here: www.centerforengagedcompassion.com/rogers.html    Frank wrote and dedicates his latest book, “Cradled in the Arms of Compassion” to his sister who took her life. He honors her spirit and also answers a question that she had for him before she passed, “How did you find healing?”   “A kindness doesn’t take the pain away, but it helps you get through it,” shared by Sister Veronique at Our Lady of the Redwoods. Frank said, “Kindness keeps the spirit alive, as we are going through suffering… that speaks to my heart.” Frank shares how compassionate Self-Restoration two fundamental components: (1) Everything happens inside of you for a reason, and we can listen to this wisdom (2) We have a self-essence, and we can always trust this no matter what we face Frank shares how he sees self energy as a spiritual energy. He said, "This is a cosmic energy to this as well, and we can plug into this energy." We spoke about Bob Falconer’s book, “The Others Within Us.” When speak about the common IFS term "burdens" Frank shared that another term used for this in religion is “demons.” He spoke about how demons can affect us on an individual level (our personal demons) a community level, and even on cosmic levels. Demons can always be met with compassion, and helped to return to the part of the universe where they belong!  “IFS is the belief in the inner goodness of all things when met with love and compassion.” I also asked, “How do we spread this urgent message that there can be more healing and compassion in the world?” Frank’s beautiful answer is that we, “follow the self-energy to where it takes us. We all can find our unique gifts, and use these to spread this positive energy within our sphere of influence.”  Frank was interviewed on "Deconstructing the Myth Podcast: Episode 43." At the end of this episode, Frank Rogers Jr. explains the name of my Podcast better than I ever could! He completed understood my intension for naming this podcast, "Empowered Through Compassion." Thank you, Frank for such a lovely conversation and connection!  
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Mar 19, 2024 • 36min

Empathy Through Connection: Stephen Andrew

Season 2, Episode 22,    Release Date: 3-19-2024 Empathy Through Connection   Stephen Andrew is CEO (Chief Energizing Officer) of Health Education & Training Institute (HETI) (https://www.hetimaine.org/stephen-andrew) He is the co-founder and President of Agape, Inc. (https://www.agapemaine.org) which supports the Men’s Resource Center of Southern Maine whose mission is to support boys, men and fathers and oppose violence and dignity for people using opiates.   Upcoming Events: April 9th and April 10th 2024… There is the 4th Annual Recovery, Inclusion, Community, Harm Reduction (RICH) Conference  (https://www.agapemaine.org/dignity)    Notes From Episode I mentioned his interview on Heart Centered Therapist Podcast    Here are the steps of Empathy according to Stephen: (1) Really see the other person (2) Listen to the content (3) Take a breath and drop into your heart (4)  Offer something: What do you imagine this person is feeling? Thinking? (5)  Watch how it lands   I believe for Stephen, “Curiosity” is similar to “Detective work” and he cautions us against this saying,  “Instead of being curious of the other person, we should be curious about our heart, and the felt sense we have of the other person.”    Stephen shared that concepts of “Self-Empathy” and “Self-Compassion” are problematic for him, because these should not lead to isolating ourselves.   “The key to self-compassion is giving it away.”   “This is about duality; we need to show up for others and ourselves.”   “We don’t want to confuse this with being in our head, and having to take care of others. We never want the other person to feel like a victim. This might lead to an unbalance of power in the relationship, and the person being "cared for" might start feeling controlled.    Stephen shares his term “Boundaries with kindness” where we simultaneously focus on our needs and other people's needs. In this way, we do not fall into a “Caretaker” role, and we maintain our own integrity. We can hold the thought, “I am here for you,” while at the same time, not slipping into a more compulsive caretaking role.     Stephen's Three Skills That Everyone Needs: (1)  Empathy, Compassion, Radical Acceptance (2)  Boundaries with Kindness (3) The Heart-Felt Apology—when you don’t do the first two correctly   Near the end of the interview, when Stephen and I are speaking about men's groups and the recent mass shooting in Maine, we were referring to a mass killing that occurred in Lewiston, MA at the end of October, 2023 (this happened about a week before we recorded our own interview).    Our love goes out to all of those people and families affected by this tragic event!
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Mar 16, 2024 • 43min

Healing Through The Self Compassion Container: The Compassion and Journey of Nancy Simons

This week I had the priviledge of speaking with Nancy Simons, who is a trainer at Syzygy Institute (which weaves together EMDR and IFS training). She speaks about some of the strengths of IFS Informed EMDR training (IIE). She also shares some of her wonderful creations in the field, including a very special protocal that she has named, "The Self-Compassion Container." Enjoy this episode, and our special converesation.
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Mar 9, 2024 • 43min

Relational Repair Through Tapping: Daphne Fatter and Self Tapping for Attachment Readiness and Repair

This week I had the pleasure of speaking with Daphne Fatter. She is a leader in the field of interweaving IFS and EMDR. She is a teacher and writer who has a lot of first hand experience with these models. I learned so much about the integration of the models from her, and I am excited to share our compassionate conversation with you. I hope you can feel some of our excitement with these models. I hope that this also inspires you to want to learn more aobut these two models and how they could help with trauma healing. Enjoy this episode!
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Mar 2, 2024 • 39min

Therapy Through The Waldorf School Experience: The Spirituality of Childhood

In this very special episode I am speaking with my 7th and 8th grade teacher Mr. Trostli. He is a Waldorf class teacher (grades 1 to 8), high school teacher, adult educator, author, and lecturer. He is the Founder and Director of Hartsbrook High School and served as the Director of the Waldorf Research Institute. We speak about the incredible impact he has had in my life, and how his beautiful views of education and Rudolf Steiner converge with my understanding of IFS and EMDR therapy. 
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Feb 23, 2024 • 53min

IFS Through EMDR Insight: Annabel McGoldrick, Journalist and EMDR Master

Today I was fortunate to speak with Annabel McGoldrick. She is a compassionate and amazing soul, who started "Peace Journalism" with her husband, and then went on to become an EMDR therapist, consultant and founder to EMDR Insght: New Horizons in EMDR Therapy and Training. She teaches classes that weave EMDR and IFS together, and has a lot of wonderful insights to share with us!  
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Feb 18, 2024 • 23min

Listening Through Poetry: Gary Whited Connects Ancient Poetry and Philosophy to IFS

Gary Whited has studied philosophy, taught philosophy, and is now a trained IFS therapist. He has published books with his poems, and has done a number of translations of the great poet and philosopher Parmenides. It was so wonderful to be introduced to this ancient world through Gary. It was also a treat to have him read some of his original poetry! It was so interesting to look at some IFS concepts through a poetic lense. I hope you ejoy this episode as much as I did!
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Feb 17, 2024 • 34min

Core Self Through the One Inside: Connecting with Tammy Sollenberger

In this episode I had the pleasure of speaking with Tammy Sollenberger. She is very well known in the IFS community. She has a popular podcast called "The One Inside" and also has written an incredible book with the same name. She has been trained in IFS, and is an IFS therapist and consultant. It was a wonderful oppotunity to sit inside some of Tammy's positive self energy as we spoke about all things IFS. I hope you enjoy! 
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Feb 9, 2024 • 51min

Addictions Through IFS: Cece Sykes and a Paradigm Shift

Welcome to this beautiful conversation with one of the masters of IFS-- Cece Sykes. She shows us how IFS can be helpful for people struggling with addictions. In fact, she goes a step further, and we speak about how addictions are all around us, sometimes we don't even recognize how many things we are all addicted to in our culture! Some addictions are even encouraged (think about the workaholics or the greedy politicians as examples). 

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