The One You Feed

Hilary Jacobs Hendel is a psychotherapist who switched from practicing traditional talk psychotherapy to accelerated experimental dynamic psychotherapy. She teaches us that our core emotions are automatic and grounded in universal physical experiences. Her new book is called, It’s Not Always Depression: Working The Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to your Authentic Self. In this episode, she goes into great instructional detail about how to identify and process your emotions in the moment. If you’ve ever felt a strong emotion (and who hasn’t), this episode will teach you how to move through it skillfully, rather than having your strong emotions wreak havoc in yourself and with others. RxBar & RxNut Butter wants to build delicious food the right way – with transparency on their simple, real ingredients. Get 25% off your first order of their best seller variety pack. Use URL http://www.rxbar.com/wolf and enter promo code WOLF at checkout (the US only)Ancestry DNA- unlock your family story – the perfect holiday gift. To get it for the special price of $59 use URL http://www.ancestry.com/wolfIn This Interview, Hilary Jabobs Hendel and I Discuss… Her new book, It’s Not Always Depression: Working The Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to your Authentic Self The 7 C’s of our authentic self The science and biology of emotions The change triangle The Core Emotions: Fear, Anger, Sadness, Disgust, Joy, Excitement and Sexual Excitement The 3 Inhibitory Emotions: Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame How core emotions have energy and want to come up and out- to be expressed Inhibitory emotions dampening our core emotions  The difference between defenses and inhibitory emotions How to work The Change Triangle Trauma vs trauma The power of naming your emotions Our open-hearted state When our emotions overwhelm us, it can be helpful to have someone else process them Grounding and breathing The role of core emotions is to ready us for action so they are first physical sensations, traveling from the brain down the vegus nerve All core emotions have impulses associated with them How harmful self-criticism and self-judgment can be Relating to ourselves as a small child Healthy shame vs toxic shame Hilary Jacobs Hendel LinksHomepageTwitterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Neil Pasricha is a New York Times bestselling author with books published in over a dozen languages. He’s spent 7 years (and counting!) on best-seller lists and his books have sold millions of copies. You may know his blog – 1000 Awesome Things – it’s won 2 Webby awards for the Best Blog in the World and has had over 50 million hits. His most recent book, The Happiness Equation: Want Nothing + Do Anything = Have Everything, is what we focus much of this interview on. You’ll learn really practical advice, grounded in research and science, on what you can do to be happier.Fin – Do you feel like you can never get everything on your to-do list done? Get a little extra help getting tasks crossed off with Fin, a digital personal assistant which can do things like book travel plans or find contractors to fix things around the house. Send Fin a couple of requests for free! Use the link www.fin.com/wolfAncestry DNA – give the gift of finding out your family history www.ancestry.com/wolf $59Quip – an electric toothbrush that makes brushing better at an affordable price $25 www.getquip.com/wolf get your first refill pack freeIn This Interview, Neil Pasricha and I Discuss… His book, The Happiness Equation: Want Nothing + Do Anything = Have Everything The 9 critical steps in achieving the happiness equation The 7 ways to be happy right now The benefits of 3 brisk 30-minute nature walks each week The power of random – or conscious – acts of kindness A complete unplug Why you should never retire Social, Stimulation, Story The importance of structure The bench test for all major life decisions His upcoming audible book on resilience The war between more and enough Neil Pasricha LinksHomepageInstagramTwitterNeil’s New Audible ShowSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Omid Safi on Radical LoveSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ralph De La Rosa on the Mind as Your TeacherSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ruth King is an emotional wisdom author, coach, and consultant. She's a guiding teacher at Insight Meditation Community of Washington and she's on the teacher's council at Spirit Rock Meditation Center. In addition, she's the founder of Mindful Members Insight Meditation Community in Charlotte, NC. She has a Master's Degree in Clinical Psychology and is the author of several publications including her new book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism from the Inside Out. In this stirring, thoughtful and wise conversation, she touches on the heart of racism and teaches how we can move to heal this heart disease.Get Ad-Free Episodes and More Ancestry DNA - more detailed in the different regions globally- www.ancestry.com/wolf get your kit for $59Casper - you spend 1/3 of your life sleeping so you need to be sleeping on the right mattress that's comfortable for you. Casper mimics the shape of your body. Affordable because it cuts out the middleman and sells direct to you www.casper.com/oneyoufeed promo code oneyoufeed get $50 towards select mattresses In This Interview, Ruth King and I Discuss... Her book, Mindful of Race: Transforming Racism From The Inside Out The value of being curious about the good and bad wolves inside of us Racism being a heart disease that is curable Her open heart surgery at the age of 27 Rage being an exit route Rage being energy moving through the body Habitual patterns of racism being a layer on top of the real issue that we can't tolerate - they are defense mechanisms Racial affinity groups 6 hindrances The structure of racism Racism vs Prejudice Racist vs Racism Understanding our own experience with racism and talking about it What it's like to be "membered" Individual vs group identity Diversity within the body of color Ruth King LinksHomepageFacebook Please support the show with a donationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Chances are, you've heard the name James Clear. Especially if you have done any research whatsoever about building habits. That's kinda his neck of the woods. His work has appeared in The New York Times, CBS This Morning, Time, Entrepreneur and he has taught in colleges around the world. In this episode, part 2 of a 2 part series, he talks more about his new book, Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones. You'll learn some really specific, easy and flat out "why didn't I think of that" genius methods to apply to your life and habits.Get Ad-Free Episodes and MoreQuip electric toothbrush fraction of the cost of other electric toothbrushes www.getquip.com/wolf and get first refill packet freeBombas INCREDIBLY comfortable socks which is reason enough to wear them but they ALSO donate a pair to a local homeless shelter for every pair that they sell get 20% off first purchase www.bombas.com/wolf offer code WOLFBlinkist- read or listen to thousands of nonfiction book summaries all on your phone in under 15 minutes www.blinkist.com/wolf to start your7-day free trial  In This Interview, James Clear and I Discuss... His book, Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits and Break Bad Ones Habits are a response to the physical cues in our environment Increasing the friction it takes to complete the task The more you increase the steps between you and the bad behavior or decrease the steps between you and the good behavior the better Habit stacking/Anchoring "After _____ I will _____" The more specific the better Social environment and habits You want to join groups where your desired behavior is the normal behavior Make it easy The two-minute rule A habit must be established before it can be improved Optimize for the starting line rather than the finish line Make it satisfying Feel successful at the end Bring the long-term consequences into the short term James Clear LinksHomepageInstagramTwitter  Please support the show with a donationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

James Clear on the Compounding Nature of Habits Part 1See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week we talk to Dr. Gabor Mate´ about addictionA renowned speaker, and bestselling author, Dr. Gabor Maté is highly sought after for his expertise on a range of topics including addiction, stress and childhood development.For twelve years Dr. Maté worked in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside with patients challenged by hard-core drug addiction, mental illness and HIV, including at Vancouver’s Supervised Injection Site.As an author, Dr. Maté has written several bestselling books including the award-winning In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction; When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress; and Scattered Minds: A New Look at the Origins and Healing of Attention Deficit Disorder, and co-authored Hold on to Your Kids. His works have been published internationally in twenty languages.Dr. Maté is the co-founder of Compassion for Addiction, a new non-profit that focusses on addiction. He is also an advisor of Drugs over Dinner.Dr. Maté has received the Hubert Evans Prize for Literary Non-Fiction; an Honorary Degree (Law) from the University of Northern British Columbia; an Outstanding Alumnus Award from Simon Fraser University; and the 2012 Martin Luther King Humanitarian Award from Mothers Against Teen Violence. He is an adjunct professor in the Faculty of Criminology, Simon Fraser University. In This Interview, Dr. Gabor Mate´ and I Discuss...  The One You Feed parable The degree of choice we have in life What is the Realm of the Hungry Ghosts? What is addiction? The characteristics of addiction Recognizing what addicts get out of their addiction The fundamental question is not “Why the Addiction” but “Why the Pain” How all addiction comes out of some hurt or trauma The different types of trauma The role of neurotransmitters in addiction How drugs and alcohol destroy the parts of the brain that allow us to make sound decisions Whether or not genetics play a significant role in addiction Whether our culture breeds addiction How our children get most of their leadership from other children How the breakup of family, community and clan is contributing to addiction The critical role of the culture in our the development of our brains Recognizing our inherent value To what degree we have freedom over our choices Without consciousness, there is no freedom Paths to recovery How compassion can help with recovery Developing compassionate curiosity towards ourselves Dr. Gabor Mate´ LinksHomepageTED TalkFacebookSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

249: Tara Brach- Re-ReleaseSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dorothy Hunt on The Heart of AwarenessSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.