Make Some Noise with Andrea Owen

Finding joy when a difficult relationship ends is possible. This week, Liza Harper, a life redesigner, joins me to talk about finding joy and clarity through relationships and life’s transitions. She’s a life and divorce coach who seeks to empower women to unleash their desires. We discuss some ways you can infuse joy into your life. Liza opens up about the personal development work she did for herself and how it led her to do the work she does today. Plus, we explored fear, shame, and stigma surrounding failing relationships.In this episode you’ll hear: How Liza helps her clients find joy in the next chapter of their lives. (5:02) Why it always works out when you bet on yourself. (14:42) Ignoring your intuition during a difficult past relationship. (26:02) Fear and shame women may experience following a relationship with a narcissist. (35:04) http://yourkickasslife.com/360  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s no secret that this year has been challenging and many have been put into situations where they need to have tough conversations. In fact, many problems can be solved when two people can have a thoughtful, mature, and healthy conversation. Yet, having tough conversations or simple communication was never taught to most of us in school; we don’t know how to do it. This week, Alexandra Jamieson returns to the podcast to discuss how to have game-changing conversations. Alexandra is the co-author of Radical Alignment, a book about how to have tough conversations at work and at home. In this episode, Alex helps us learn the steps needed to show up as your best self, regardless of how the conversation turns out.  How a communication workshop for couples inspired Alex and her husband, Bob, to write their book, Radical Alignment. (22:00) How we fall into traps of bad communication. (10:00) Why the common culprit in miscommunication is the missing conversation. (18:16) You can create team psychological safety with equal speaking time. (25:00) The 4 steps in the All-In Method, including declaring the topic of conversation. (24:27) How to invite someone to an emotional or high-stakes conversation. (40:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/359 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“Narcissism” seems to be a buzzword these days and I wanted to have an expert on who can give us the low-down. According to trauma therapist, Britt Frank, everyone has shades of narcissism. She goes on to say that high-level narcissism is an addiction to self-protection by any means necessary. And for those who have experienced a relationship with a narcissist, it is a traumatic experience. In this week’s episode, Britt joins me to discuss how to heal from traumatic relationships, including those in which narcissistic abuse is present. Britt is also a teacher and speaker who specializes in the "Science of Stuck." In this episode you’ll hear:  What is a narcissist and how does someone know they may be in a relationship with someone who is a narcissist? (6:33) Britt’s goal is “dismantling the mental health myths that keep us feeling STUCK and SICK”. She shares what she means by that. (13:34) Dealing with trauma: Some signs or patterns which signal someone should deal with their trauma. (16:07) Why someone may get physically addicted to their narcissist and experience withdrawals. (22:27) How someone can begin to heal from a narcissistic relationship. (27:03) Mother wounds and grieving our childhoods (the things we didn’t get) or other parts of our lives. (31:04) How COVID has affected Britt’s work, including the collective processing of COVID trauma. (38:13) http://yourkickasslife.com/358  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I am doing something I have never done in any podcast episode. For the first time, I am bringing you an interview I did on another podcast, where someone interviewed me. My dear friend Rebecca Ching has a podcast called The Unburdened Leader. It was such a fantastic conversation and I am so grateful that she said, “Yes,” when I asked her if I could air it for my listeners. We talked about a lot of hard things, including grief and addiction. On 9/27, I celebrated nine years of sobriety and recovery from alcoholism. It is something we talked about in this particular episode. I share how commitment to my values helped me maintain my continued healing and sobriety and how grief nearly brought me out of recovery. In this episode you’ll hear:  My addiction to alcohol and what it symbolized. Why I needed to understand and heal my traumas in order to fully unburden the last of my addictions. Perfection, control, and overachieving worked until it didn’t. Drinking worked for a while until it didn’t.  The role community plays in my sobriety. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Alexandra Katehakis is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist and Founder of Center for Healthy Sex and she joins me to discuss the topic of healing from love addiction. While love addiction may not be something affecting your life where you need to seek treatment, it could be something to look at in terms of some unhealthy coping mechanisms affecting your life.We discuss what love addiction is, the root cause (which stems from father abandonment), and what the steps to healing look like. Dr. Alex offers amazing insight and advice about what it means to be a love addict and how to step into recovery. I hope this episode is helpful to you, in some way. In this episode you’ll hear:  What is love addiction? And how it differs between men and women. (5:59) Women struggle with a concept called ‘mother hunger’ and therefore it is crucial for women to find support from other women in order to heal from sex or love addiction. (12:33) The root cause of love addiction. (14:45) There comes a point when we realize we are hurting ourselves, plus why going into the pain (withdrawal) is how we can heal. (18:22) What sobriety looks like for love addicts and some of the first steps someone can take to heal. (22:03) How to assert healthy boundaries for more equal relationships. (35:11) http://yourkickasslife.com/356  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This September is the 10th year anniversary of Your Kick-Ass Life! Over the years, the YKAL team has evolved and grown. In this episode, Liz Applegate, our lead coach here at YKAL, joins me for a conversation about shit that matters. We are talking about aging, perimenopause, and depression. One of the reasons I wanted to have a conversation about these topics was to shine a light on some of the ways they can show up in one’s life, especially in 2020, and the curveball we’ve been thrown this year. In this episode you’ll hear: Liz shares her history with depression and antidepressants and how she gave herself permission to seek mental health help. (8:30) I share my experience of how a discussion with my therapist about burnout turned into one about high functioning depression. (19:33) Our thoughts and feelings (and struggle) on being middle-aged. (22:08) What we think about navigating perimenopause. (34:25) http://yourkickasslife.com/355 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Happiness. It’s 2020 and I have a feeling that many of us could use a dose of that. Right? Well, you’re in luck because Kim Strobel, happiness coach, joins me to talk about how to be happier. Happiness isn’t always born from unicorns and rainbows. In fact, you’ll hear how Kim’s happiness coaching was born out of her own trauma, darkness, and suffering. Together we discuss toxic positivity, why turning off negative feelings isn’t helpful, and the importance of putting your happiness first. Kim also shares some of the happiness habits we can practice in order to increase happiness levels. Finally, we also explore the Arena of Bigness, what it means, and how to step into the Arena with courage and do really hard things. In this episode you’ll hear: Kim opens up about her struggle with mental illness and what that looks like in her life now. (5:20) Why today’s culture of positivity and the conventional formula for happiness is wrong. (21:30) Putting your happiness and wellbeing at the forefront is of the utmost importance. (23:54) We all have a set baseline happiness default. Kim talks about how we can work to retrain the brain to feel happy even when struggling through tough times. (26:47) How somebody who feels as though they are living a small life can step out of that and into the Arena of Bigness. (42:08) http://yourkickasslife.com/354  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week on the YKAL podcast we’re talking about resilience and intuition. To help me unpack this topic is my guest, Dr. Andrea Pennington. She is an integrative physician, acupuncturist, meditation teacher, #1 international bestselling author, and TEDx speaker. Together Dr. Andrea and I discuss what it means to be resilient, how tolerating stress is not the same thing as being resilient, and how self-care plays a key role in resilience. Plus, she shares what it means to learn who you really are, how to share your personal story, and listening to your intuition. In this episode you’ll hear: Dr. Andrea shares her story of debilitating imposter syndrome and how it led her to do the work she is doing today. (9:18) What it means to be resilient and some traits of resilient people. (11:30) Tolerating stress is not the same as being resilient. (14:20) In order to embrace who you are, you must first need to learn who you are. (17:49) Dr. Andrea shares about her own struggle with depression and how music has been such an influence and help. (24:09) The power in sharing your personal story and how you can start sharing yours. (36:01) http://yourkickasslife.com/353  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

 Are you a woman who struggles with asking for what you want at work? This week we are talking about some of the things that hold women back in the workplace with guest, Sara Laschever! Sara is an authority on the challenges that shape women’s lives at work. She is the co-author, with Linda Babcock, of Women Don’t Ask, the groundbreaking study that first focused public attention on the forces preventing women from negotiating on their own behalf. I stumbled upon Sara’s work while doing research for my third book and I was fascinated. I am thrilled to have her on the show!In this episode you’ll hear:  Some common obstacles women confront in the workplace and some ways in which they can overcome them. (5:35) The impact of subconscious biases on women in the workplace. (13:07) Direct or controlling behavior in men at work will often go unremarked, yet with women, we tend to mark it. (18:12) Some ways in which women can go through the process of evaluating their talents and target what will make their personal and professional lives more fulfilling. (19:31) Why most women find it hard to negotiate their salaries or ask for the things they want. Plus, some small steps they can take towards asking for what they really want.(22:22) Has the culture of work changed? I asked Sara if the struggle with negotiations is more of a Baby Boomer, Gen X, Millennial, or Gen Z generation problem? Listen in to hear her answer. (30:59) http://yourkickasslife.com/352  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When it comes to personal development, positivity and cheering people on is great. And…if we really want to support and love women, we have to also make room for the difficult stuff, for the traumas and the “shadow side”. That is where this week’s guest, Christine Gutierrez’s work really comes in. Christine returns to the YKAL podcast and together we discuss honoring your pain, going to the darkness in order to get to the light and living in a world where your light side and dark side can co-exist. Christine is a Latina licensed psychothera​pist, life coach and expert in love addiction, trauma, abuse, and self- esteem. She is the author of the upcoming book, I am Diosa: A Journey to Healing Deep, Loving Yourself, and Coming Back to Your Soul. I hope you enjoy our conversation. Who is Diosa and what being Diosa is all about. (4:06) Christine’s book is broken up into three parts: The darkness, the light and the integration. She explains why she chose to write it in this way. (9:34) Why it is important to explore your emotional triggers. (14:26) How to know if you’ve experienced trauma. (16:03) Repairing your intuition after trauma and how to heal. (20:00) Why Christine walks people through a meditation journey to help them visualize their first memories of anger or sadness. (27:38) http://yourkickasslife.com/351  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices