Unhurried Living | Helping Christians Rest Deeper & Lead Better

What would it look like for you to slow down your inner pace as you converse with someone else? Here are five ways you can practice being present and listening to another person: Begin to quiet your mind as you listen. We all have distractions, but begin to practice setting aside your own inner whirlwind for a bit. Let the life of the person in front of you come to center stage. Quiet your own mind and tune in to what they are saying. Be at rest in their presence. Let God’s love for the person enter into your heart. This is the time for empathy. Remind yourself that this person is loved by God exactly as they are. Let God’s reality become yours. As you listen, let your heart fill with love for them. Whatever they share, you know that God is already there. God is accomplishing His work in their life. You can become a conduit for God’s love by opening yourself to God as you listen. Resist the temptation to problem-solve. It is easy for us to move directly into problem-solving or advice-giving mode. Watch out for this tendency. Most people truly just need to be heard. As they are talking things out, they often stumble upon their own solution. Even if they don’t, your humble, listening ear is still a gift they may not find anywhere else. Don’t rob them of the beauty of simply sharing their life. Think about what God might have on His heart for the person. Listening to the person and at the same time listening to God—this is an art form we can learn. As you listen, remain open to the heart of God. How might God feel toward this person? What might God desire for their life? Respond with invitations and questions. When you respond, try to do so in a way that shows you really heard them. Let your response be filtered through the question “What would God desire for them?” For example, you could replace “You know what you should do…” with “What is God inviting you to in this situation?” Give them space to thoughtfully respond. Listening can help us learn that we do not always have to be “on” or fix other people. The Lord Himself is working His own processes in each of our lives. We can learn to be true friends, mentors, & influencers as we cooperate with Him. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

In this week's episode, we share a recent conversation Alan had with James Bryan Smith about his latest book, The Good and Beautiful You. In it, he talks about who we really are in God. How has God created us to flourish? What does it look like to be fully alive inside? How do we discover the person Jesus created us to be? We think you’re going to find this episode really helpful in answering questions like these. A few years ago, Alan and Gem wrote their book on the soul titled What Does Your Soul Love?  There is such a difference between being a self that we define and being a soul made in the image of a good and beautiful God. We have no better sense of meaning, purpose or identity than one given by a Master Artist who created us as an expression of divine vision. God makes us special. In God we belong.  James Bryan Smith is a professor of theology at Friends University in Wichita, Kansas, where he also serves as the director of the Apprentice Institute for Christian Spiritual Formation. He is a founding member of Richard J. Foster's spiritual renewal ministry, Renovaré, and is an ordained United Methodist Church minister, serving in various capacities in local churches. Jim is author of a number of best-selling books, including the Good and Beautiful series which includes The Good and Beautiful God, The Good and Beautiful Life, and The Good and Beautiful Community, and the latest in that series that we’re talking about today, The Good and Beautiful You.  Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

"So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t." (Romans 12:5, MSG)⁠⁠"Love one another from the center of who you are…" (Romans 12:9, MSG)⁠⁠I now often use these verses as I prepare I speak to a group. I remind myself to embrace and to be who I am, without qualification. ⁠⁠I get to be exactly who I was made to be. ⁠⁠And I remember that I get to love those in front of me from the center of who I am. What a treat. What a privilege! And, to borrow a phrase, I can do that!⁠⁠This is an Unhurried Living way of serving. I serve from my authentic self and I love from the center of that place. ⁠⁠So much freer than trying to pretend I am something I am not and trying to impress those I am teaching.⁠⁠I prefer authenticity and love over pretending and impressing.⁠⁠If you are suffering from situational anxiety today, remind yourself that you are loved, that you get to be exactly who you are, and that you can love from the center of your deepest place. ⁠ Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website.⁠You, too, do not have to pretend or impress. You can give your best and leave the outcomes to God. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

In our book, What Does Your Soul Love?, I shared the story of how I was learning photography at the same time as I was in the midst of a dark night of the soul. At the time, and to this day, I carry within me the principles and metaphors of photography as a paradigm for my life. There are many connections here between photography, presence and perspective. I’d like to share three with you now. 1. Look for the light.2. Remember the rule of three.3. Choose where to focus.Listen to today's I Can Do That Podcast as I unpack all three of these dynamics. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

I’ve been a spiritual director and coach for many women over many years. There are common themes that have arisen in that time. ⁠⁠One prevalent theme I bump into over and over is this: Women tend to think there is something wrong with them if they are not progressing quickly through their current situation. ⁠⁠Whether it’s a difficult work situation, a troubled relational issue, a period of extended grief, or any formational dynamic, most are convinced that quickly is the only reasonable and truly healthy way forward. This is usually an unconscious bias that goes unnoticed until you say some things out loud and look at them a little closer.⁠⁠What’s the rush? Let go of the need to get over it and to continue a production-line mentality. This takes courage and hope, but in the long run you will have participated in your own transformational process. ⁠⁠You are being shaped more and more into the image of Christ. How long might that take? Breathe. Feel. Cooperate with the invitations set before you. It’s counter cultural, but this isn’t a race and no one is grading you.⁠⁠Allow yourself the gift of grace. Grace of pacing. Grace of process. Grace of permission.⁠⁠Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

As a person of influence, you may be tempted to move ahead more quickly than your people can move. Be sure they sense you are with them in their journey, that you aren’t trying to drag them forward at your pace.If you are accompanying someone on their journey right now, notice if you are allowing them the dignity to set their own pace. Are there any adjustments you need to make as you accompany them? Relationship is more important than achievement. And, if you find yourself on the receiving end of someone else’s grace, it’s ok to receive that gift from them. If you need more time, that’s ok. The fact that you are still pedaling means something. You aren’t giving up and you will get to your destination. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Often, when I talk about Unhurried Time with God, I offer that the reason we do it is because Jesus himself did it. Jesus often withdrew to lonely places to pray. He got in touch with the Father so he could find out what to do, and more importantly, who he was. Jesus said that the works he did were the Father’s works and the words he spoke were the Father’s words. How else did he know what to do and say except for time spent in God’s presence? Wouldn’t it be great for someone to look at your life and work and exclaim, “Wow! That looks exactly like Jesus. I can’t distinguish between the two of you because you are so much alike.” How might we copy our Master so that our work is indistinguishable from his? What amount and kind of time does that take?Ask yourself: What sorts of practices are conducive to receiving the love, mentorship, and guidance of Jesus? What does apprenticeship to Jesus look like in your current season? Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn even more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

A few of our deepest needs are to be seen, known and heard. Some of us can share our hidden spaces directly with God. Others may need to make their way to God with the help of trusted friends, spiritual directors, coaches or counselors. Either way is beautiful because it means you are becoming more whole. So…show it all to God. Tell it like it is. It’s already happening and God knows about it. You are not hiding just because you have your hands over your eyes. That toddler game of peek-a-boo is cute with a little one, but it is exhausting for us if we continue to play it as an adult. Find the freedom you desire. Take that next small, simple and gracious step forward. The one that you can see. Don’t worry about all of the other steps. The grace for each of those will be there when you get there. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her programs at the Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

“Unnatural, frantic, anxious work, work done under pressure of greed or fear or any other inordinate passion, cannot properly speaking be dedicated to God, because God never wills such work directly.” (Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation, p. 19)These words are a direct blow to my anxiety. Frantic work is never God’s invitation. Simply being reminded of this can be enough to quell the low hum of anxiety.If I know anything about myself it’s this: I want all that I do to be dedicated to God. And if anything stands in the way of that, I want to stop doing it as soon as I am able.So I’ll sink further into this reality: “The Lord is my shepherd. I have everything I need.” The ways of Jesus are found in the Great Commandment, the Fruit of the Spirit, the Sermon on the Mount, Psalm 23, and more. We do not see Jesus moving frantically or anxiously.  Even with all of his interactions, he always shared underlying dynamic: “I do what the Father is doing. I say what the Father is saying.” He always knew what he was about and he felt no need to push or to burn the fuel of anxiety. Jesus was not frantic.Identify an area of your life in which you are moving frantically or anxiously. Remember, as Merton said, God never wills such work. How might you make an inner shift that leads to working from a non-anxious heart? Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn about her at the Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Wherever I go, do I act as though I should be there or am I held back by self-doubt? Do I enter with holy confidence or am I hamstrung by fear? Do I engage with assured presence or am I pressed down by anxiety? What if a “Beloved child of God” ticket was in my hand and I could use it at will. Like an eternal park hopper pass at Disneyland. Or like a never-ending entrance to the Cathedral in Florence. Of course, I don’t need to wonder—because I am a beloved child of God. Jesus assures me of this. It isn’t in question. How about this: the next time you stand on the threshold of a new opportunity, and fear raises its ugly head, look down into your hand and see your “Beloved child of God” ticket. Then proceed to enter in like any ticket holder would. The next time you need to set a healthy boundary, look down into your hand, see your ticket, remember you are loved, and then continue to make your way. The next time you want to enter more deeply into an unhurried way of life, and anxiety about your value-apart-from-production pops up, notice the ticket in your hand, and move forward. Confidence in my belovedness can be at least as sure as when I hold a ticket to a concert and I know I’ll get in the door. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn about her programs at the Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.